Aug. 17, 2009 A Life on Hold
That's what I've been living for the past... oh, three years maybe. Constant nausea is so difficult to deal with. So I say, "Oh, I really want to go swimming (or hiking or take a dance class or whatever), but I just don't feel good enough. Maybe next week I'll feel good enough (or next month or next year or whatever)." But so far, the only thing I've gotten is worse. More sick, more weak, more nauseas, more self conscious, more depressed. But you know what? I can't keep living my life on hold. I can't keep waiting to feel better before I enjoy life. I want to enjoy it NOW!!! And I can at least pretend to enjoy it even when I feel sick (at least most of the time I can pretend).
So you know what? On Saturday I went in the sprinkler at my grandma's house with my little sis and bro. And you know what? I felt really really sick. But you know what else? I didn't actually 'get sick' (if you know what I mean), and afterwards when I was all dryed off and everything I did feel better.
I've been going for bike rides and working out, but I want to do fun things! Yesterday we went to visit one of my friends at her church. That was fun, and guess what? I didn't pass out. I didn't even 'get sick' even though I felt like I might.
Maybe this is my 'thorn in the flesh', ya know? Maybe this is what I will have to live with for the rest of my life. I don't want to live my whole life saying "Tomorrow....next week.... next year..." I want to enjoy it now. Of course, there are times when I really can't do much of anything and I do have to stay in bed or on the couch, but I'm going to try to enjoy life more and try doing things even when I don't feel good.
I've had times of not wanting to live anymore at all, but hopefully this will help me not to think about that anymore. |
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Aug. 6, 2009 Hey there ho there how do you do?! (random line from Princess diaries if you didn't know)
So I had another dr's appointment yesterday. It went good she said that I look a lot better and I've gained 2 pounds so that's good. Bad news is that I've gotta keep on this no gluten no lactose diet! Bleck ! I was so hoping that I'd be able to go back to eating normal food now!
Anyways, next week I have another dr.'s appointment and it promises to be more embarressing than usual, so ugh! pray that it goes well please.
On another note, I've been enjoying the summer weather (except for having some kind of allergy where my throat gets all scratchy and feels like I can't breathe good  ) But I went for a bike ride and stuff yesterday and it was great! then I went down to the lake and it was really nice and refreshing. I'm so glad that I don't live where there are alligaters and crocidiles! (You can probably tell that I don't since I have no idea how to spell them!)
One thing I've been thinking about is that one of the reasons that it's important to be modest no matter where you go and whether you are 12 or 20 (or older lol) is so that you can be a good witness for Jesus and so that you don't attract the wrong kind of people to be around you. Immodest girls get a lot of attention but it's the wrong kind of attention and stuff and so we don't want to be like that but we want to be treated like the daughters of the King that we are, not like some kind of cheap fix or whatever.
So yup, that's what I've been thinking about.
Hey, I watched "Clueless" last night and it was awful! I mean, it was a cute story but it was so innapropriete that it's not worth watching! Bleck! I fast-forwarded quite a bit of it. I love "Emma" though so I thought that I'd like it but I didn't. 
Hey there is a great website that you can look up movies on that I found it's called "Kids in mind" and if you google it it's the one that says "Kids in mind: movie ratings that actually work" and it's really cool but it can make a movie sound lots worse than it is sometimes! (Or in the case of "clueless" not nearly as bad as it actually is)
We're going to a family picnic this Saturday. I hope that it goes good!  |
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Jul. 27, 2009 I love summer!
Isn't summer great? Yesterday I went out and picked raspberries for a pie in our own backyard. Today we're going to go blueberry picking and probably get enough to put in the freezer for winter.
I've been feeling a lot better. this diet of gluten and lactose free is really helping I think. Though I still have times when I don't feel good.
Guess what?! One of my friends had a birthday party on Saturday and you know who came and sang at it? Charlie Zahm! It was really cool
But while we were there this lady who I hardly even know just randomly came up and started asking me all kinds of kind of personal questions. And then she started telling me about all of her troubles and how she had been sexually abused and stuff... I don't know how to react when people talk about stuff like that. It's kind of like whoa, probably shouldn't be telling me about it! Yikes! So that kind of weirded me out... I felt really bad for her but I just don't know what to do in a situation like that. 
Hey I went for the first bike ride of the year last week! It went really good too, not nearly as hard as I thought it would be! 
Oh yeah, and I watched "Princess Protection Program" with my little sister. She loved it. I think that me and her are going to get dressed up later today to look like princesses just for fun. For my birthday I got two really really pretty necklaces that look like royal jewels, and so probably we'll wear those.
I LOVE SUMMER! Make sure that you are enjoying summer today! (Even if it's too hot to go outside where you live!)
Bye  |
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So according to the blood test results there's nothing really wrong with me. It didn't go very well getting my blood taken, and she didn't get all she wanted because I was passing out, but at least it's overwith. And at least we know that it's not my blood sugar or anything.
I've been feeling better with this diet, but for the past two days I've been tummy sick again. my poor littlest sister is really sick too and has hives and is tummy sick. please pray for both of us because we're pretty misruble.
I got an award from NachoAverageGirl!
Thank you so much! It made my day. I'm going to award it to
1AspiringLilly
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Jun. 18, 2009 award and dr.s
 Yay, thanks Lilly for the award!
i'm giving it to
• nachoaveragegirl
• shootingstar
• anniegirl
• Lizzy4124
• 1ofhis
• Twizzlergirl
(and I would give it to Lilly only she's already got it!)
thanks again lilly! i love this award, it's so cool!
So anyways, i went to the dr.'s and she said that she thinks that I'm sensitive to gluten and milk. so now I'm off of those things for 6 whole weeks (and maybe longer after that). I also have to get my blood drawn and a bunch of tests done. Do you know what I dreamed about last night? that I was really hungry and the only thing we had in the house was pizza and I couldn't eat it and then I dreamed I had to get my blood taken and they made a mistake so they had to do it again! It was awful!
so I'm kind of freaked about getting my blood taken but it's going to be soon, MAYBE today! I don't know. i wish that i did!
but I was kind of freaked about going off of gluten and milk because guess what I eat all the time? BREAD, Cereal, Milk, yogurt and stuff like that. but she said that I could still have some yogurt once in a while, and we bought a bunch of food from the healthfood store that didn't have gluten or lactose in it. Lol, so in a funny kind of way I'm enjoying it because of all the treats that I've got. 
weeeelllll.... that's about it. I actually am feeling better and not having as many tummy aches already.
Edit: i'm going in to get my blood taken in one hour at 10:20 AM! Please pray for me because I have this irrational fear of needles... I know, it's retarded, but I do. But right now I'm willing to do just about anything to get better!
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Yep, i've been sick lately. don't exactly know what's wrong with me. in fact I've been sick for like three years. Mostly that I can't eat without feeling sick, but a few other tings too. So i've got a dr's appointment tomorrow, and I'm really hoping that she'll be able to tell what's wrong with me. But she want sme to get blood tests and I hate blood tests.
But oh my goodness, you'll never guess how God provided the money for this! One of my friends dad's that I had only met once just randomly wrote out a check for $500 and gave it to my mom specifically for getting tests done for me! IT was like, wow! God really does care about ME! And He does hear when i pray! It's awesome!
Oh, my sister's party was yesterday, so that was crazy. My grandparents were there so of course they insulted my dad and he was upset last night. *sigh* why can't they act maturely?
But hey, I got to see my cousin's new baby! *squeels* soooooooo cute! Looks just like my cousin's baby pics! Like totally JUST like him! Can't even believe it!
So yeah a couple of days ago I was at a homeschool convention for a few hours (didn't go for the whole thing) and I totally got snubbed by two of my friends. It was just mean. I don't even know what they're mad about because I haven't seen them in like a year. I really wish that I could ask them why they're mad and if I could appologize for whatever I must have done wrong, but they seem to have completely cut me off. Actually, I don't know if it's me because their parents got really mad at my dad a while back cause of they didn't believe in baby baptism or something silly like that and then the mom was like really upset with me for NO reason. But I was sad that they didn't even smile at me! We used to e-mail every day! But I did see a old friend who was SO sweet! Just ran right up and gave me a hug! So that made up for the others. And you know, someone who knew me for over six years must know me better than someone who only knew me for about two, right?
So anyways, hopefully after tomorrow I'll be able to start eating normally! Pray for me if you think of it!
Oh, and I just found this really cute song by Taylor swift! Here is the video for it (but one of the outfits is kind of immodest) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGWE3hwJ21U |
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Well, ok, I've been back for a couple of weeks. I have just been so busy because we are cleaning the house and everything that I haven't posted. Sorry!
I have my herb garden planted! (Doesn't that sound great? Actually it's basically parsely and basil plus dill and one or two other things that I don't know the name of. )
Sometimes it's hard to believe that there is a guy out there that I could marry someday. All of the homeschool boys I've met (lets say between 14 and 24) are selfish and lazy and almost nasty. Are there actuallly guys out there who don't look at junk online? Who can be even civil to their parents and siblings? Whenever you talk to most of them you feel gross because you can tell that they're not looking at your face (and believe me, I don't dress immodestly).
But there's got to be at least one godly young man out there who isn't married or over 30.
I guess it's just important to remember that God is in control of our lives and if He wants me to get married I will and He won't make me settle for a jerk. Right???
Hey, my hair has been driving me crazy lately. I have waistlength curly hair. Does anyone have any sugguestions of styles that wouldn't hurt my head? I do pony tails, and half up half down usually. |
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May. 10, 2009 YAY! We're leaving! Apr. 30, 2009 Edible Plants
I have been thinking how much I would like to know that if i got lost in the woods for a week that i would be able to know what to eat so that I wouldn't have to go hungry. So I am going to be learning about edible plants in the next couple of weeks. So far I've identified Dandylions (very easy) Violets (even easier) and Plantain (harder) as far as eating the leaves. My brother and I made a salad out of them last night and it was kind of bitter except for the violet leaves which were almost sweet and good.
I'm using the Peterson Field Guide of Edible Wild Plants and it's really easy to use.
By the way, if you are worried about the swine flu you should read this article http://www.cqs.com/influenza.htm My dad says that what it says is true and he should know.
I'm leaving next Sunday (not this sunday but the 10th) and will be gone for two weeks, so don't get worried if I don't post for two weeks. I will try to take pictures and everything (it's kind of hard to take pictures without any people in them, but I can't really take pictures of my family and put them up on the internet. Oh well)
I didn't realize how many evenings I go to watch a movie until I tried stopping. almost every night. I don't know how it happened because my mom used to just let us watch one hour a week. Who knows. But I think that not watching movies is good for me.
By the way I want to make a costume like Marian's in the robin hood series 1&2 (I like basically all of her clothes though I would 'modest them up' a bit if I was making them) does anybody know of a pattern I could use for them?
Oh yeah and my grandma is doing really good. almost completely better!
Well, bye. |
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Apr. 27, 2009 So, yup, what's going on with me.
On Saturday, at the homeschool convention , I bought "Set Apart Femininity" by Leslie Ludy (katy told me to get it. *thanks katy!!!*) I started reading it that afternoon and really liked it! I was expecting another book that would tell me that to obey God I had to wear a huge bag for a dress to be modest, but Oh my Goodness! That was not what it was about at ALL! This book is amazing, I think that it would be helpful for any Christian, but especially teen girls.
I have decided that for this week i'm not going to watch any movies or listen to any secular music. during the time that i would usually do that I'm going to read my Bible and pray. Do you know what? I usually pray an average of like 2 minutes a day. Now how can I be a true princess if I only spend 2 minutes with the King??? I'm going to try to be better about that and to try to pray for things specifically instead of just being like "please bless Mrs. smith amen".
Plus I'm doing a no-sugar fast. I'm hoping that God will give me a clear idea of what I need to change.
already I can see that He is 'repairing the breaches' in my 'wall' (read the Set Apart Femininity book).
So yeah. If you think about it, please pray for me because I have a feeling that this is going to be harder than I thought. (espeically the music and sugar) |
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How come I can be perfectly happy one day, and then the next day be so low that I don't even want to live anymore?
Anyways, my grandma is having her operation this Thursday on the 2nd, so please pray for her. It's a bigger surgery this time, I guess, cause she's staying overnight this time.
And I found a cute little barbie vid to the song "Princes and Frogs" by Superchick. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Im6JZ9eVBg
I don't like barbie, but I thought this was cute. |
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Hey, Guess what I bought today? A "Moss Rose" Tea Set for 5 bucks at a thrift store! first I'll paste some info on it, and then I'll show ya some pics.
"The Moss Rose pattern was very popular during the 1940's to 1960's and was produced by several manufacturers with slight variations, but always recognizable with the familiar tiny closed rosebuds."
And now for some pics. Pretty huh?
I put it in my hope chest. :-)
Only trouble is that there are like two flaws on two of the cups, and there's a chip out of the teapot lid (which doesn't match). But that's ok, I'm still really happy about it! |
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Mar. 19, 2009 Adrenal Fatigue?
Hey everyone!
I have a question. My Mom has Adrenal Fatigue (however you spell that!). Do you know anything about what it is and if I can do something to help her? (or if she needs to take some kind of vitamin?)
My Grandma is going to have to have a mastectomy on April 12th 
My Aunt has some kind of yeast problem and some people are trying to sue her or something.
I just want to help my Mom, but I don't really know what to do, especially since she's stressed out and one of her friends had a miscarriage recently.
I just feel so useless. I want to help! |
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Mar. 16, 2009 Onion Poultice
Today my little sister was having trouble with a cough and deep lung congestion. So Mom and I made an onion poultice.
Here is a picture of Mom's hands cutting up the onions.
It worked pretty good, but my little sister kept saying "Oh, it's too hot!" so I kept cooling it but I think it would have worked better if she had been able to have the onions a little hotter. They weren't burning or anything, but I think they were just uncomfortable. Probably cause her skin is sensitive from the cold that she has.
So that was interesting.
i started a new schedule today where instead of saying "at 7:00 do such and such" I say "do such and such for half hour" so that I don't get depressed when I am over fifteen minutes or something.
So far it's going really good.
Well, bye! |
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Mar. 12, 2009 Back From Our Trip!
Our trip was fun. It went really well even though we had a delay before we left because of a snowstorm so we had to leave in the afternoon instead of in the morning.
here is a picture that i took in CA. Aren't the trees pretty? It was blossom time so there was a lot of beautiful flowers and blossoms.
We got to stay with two families during the week. One of them had three boys (all younger than me) and one of them had 6 boys and 3 girls. the two older boys worked almost the whole time, but we had fun playing tag and Fugitives with everyone else. Oh yeah, and we got most everyone to play duck-duck-goose!
One thing that i realized when I was out there is that I use the computer to escape reality a lot. But now that i know that I can work to not do that anyomre.
We had a really good time.
Here is one more picture of flowers that I took. I love flowers. It isn't until May that we get them.
So yup, we had a great time! |
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Feb. 26, 2009 A little bit of this and a little bit of that!
So, it turns out that even though my grandma's lumpectomy went good, and there was clean margins or whatever, they still want her to have radiation. So now she has to decide if she's going to do that or not.
To change the subject... I got a four-hoop-skirt off of e-bay, and it's really nice but it's way too big around. It doesn't fit under my skirts at all. Does anyone know if I should go with a three-hoop-skirt or a semi-full-A-line-skirt or just a regular A-line-crinoline ? I'm only 5'3", so I want to get something that won't look really silly and I will be able to be comfortable in. I'm leaning more towards the A-line or the semi full A-line. Any ideas? Oh, and I found this really cool site about etiquette in the 1800s... http://web.archive.org/web/20040210020216/http://members.aol.com/gallen9075/ettiquet.htm I thought it was cool
We are going on a trip on Sunday night. Or rather Monday morning at 3:00 AM. But that's night time to me! We're going to be gone a week to California. I will try to show you pictures when we get back.
I'm sorry I haven't posted in so long. I was having a really hard time, but I had a really long talk with my parents last Sunday and I'm feeling much better now.
I have decided that I really like "Lois and Clark", at least the first season. They're so cute together, and I like that they are friends.
You know, I'm starting to really hate smallville! I decided that I only really like a couple of episodes in the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, and 4th seasons and then they really go down hill. it's much more of a soap opra now. ick! Oh well.
Guess what? I went to the dollar store the other week and they had handkerchiefs! Really pretty ones too. One of them was even embroidered!
I'm making a 40s style dress. I've never sewn a dress with a real collar before and it's really challenging. But I tried on the bodice the other day and I think it's going to fit!
Well, that's all for now! Bye. |
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Feb. 3, 2009 I was AWARDED!!!
Yeah, awarded! How cool is that??? Thank you to 1AspiringLilly for awarding me. that was so sweet of her. It really made my day.
RULES
1. Put the logo on your blog or post.
2. Nominate at least 10 blogs which show great Attitude and/or Gratitude.
3. Let them know that they have received this award by commenting on their blog
4. Share the love and the link to this post and to the person from whom you have received the award!
Well, I don't have 10 blogs to nominate... but I do nominate each of my wonderful friends on here. (of course, I can't award 1aspiringlilly back... can i?)
• nachoaveragegirl
• shootingstar
• anniegirl
• 1ofhis
• Twizzlergir |
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