I posted a while back about my mission of motherhood (a term I am borrowing from one of my favorite books by Sally Clarkson "The Mission of Motherhood").  You can click on the link above if you'd like to read my previous post.  Since that time ... about a month ago ... the Lord has taught me so much about myself and my high calling that it is amazing to me!  Talk about an answer to prayer!  May I share with you what I have learned?

It all started with that cry about a month ago to the Lord to help me change my ways ... and then I "stumbled" (HA ... God put it in my path!) upon "Heartlfelt Discipline" by Clay Clarkson.  What an eye-opener that book has been!  I loved it so much from reading a copy I found in our local library that I ordered one from eBay. 

One HUGE thing that grabbed my attention was the author's discussion of the parable of the sower in Luke 8.   

To quote from the book ... "This parable is not about good seed but about good soil.  The emphasis is squarely on the condition and quality of the soil, an image used here to represent a person's heart.  In this parable the seed is always good because it's the gospel message, but the soil of human hearts varies greatly ... I realized that even as I scattered seeds in my child's heart, I needed to pay more attention to soil preparation ... My real work is not to grow character qualities but to prepare the soil of my child's heart to be ready to receive the seed of God's Word, the gospel.  That's when character growing begins - when the Spirit of God brings Christ's life into my child's heart."

How do we cultivate the soil of our children's hearts?

• With the language of God's truth
• With the behaviors of the Christian life
• With the reality of God

Some other things that the book talks about that I agree with are:

• We familiarize our children with the ways and words of God so that accepting the gospel will be a natural step forward
• We are readying their hearts, preparing fertile soil that deep roots can sink in
• The task is not to plant enough good seeds to crowd out the world's weedy influences; it's about faithfully preparing the soil of our children's hearts
• I can grow a million seeds of character into my child's heart, but unless her heart has been prepared, and until it is changed by Christ, those seeds will be wasted. 

And my favorite:

• There must be hoeing if the sowing is to result in growing.

I realized that I had been focusing on the seed I was planting and not really so much on the soil into which I was planting it.  My parenting was not full of grace, I was not being "Jesus-with-skin-on" to my child, I was being a "better parent" than God ... I have since realized that I need to relate to my children in the same way that the Lord relates to me. 

Does He make me feel guilty?  Does He express disappointment with me?  Does He yell at me?  Does He get angry with me?  Does He exasperate me?  Does He get irritated with me? 

Or ....

Does He love me unconditionally and make sure in His Word that I am aware of that fact?  Does He ALWAYS welcome me with open arms?  Is He patient with me?  Is He understanding with me?  Is He slow to anger?  Does He forgive me of  my sin and remove my sins from me as far as the east is from the west?  Does He comfort me?  Does He discipline me lovingly and only when He sees that I really need it?  Is He creative with me?  Does He allow me to be free?  Does He allow me to be who I am? 

Oh, there's so much to Gods' grace and His character and His love that I have misunderstood for so many years ... I am only recently coming to understand who He truly is.  And in that growing understanding He is asking me to also be who He has called me to be ... a representative of Him here in earth and it starts with my family.

Thanks for letting me share and I hope this all made at least a little bit of sense!

~Heather