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May. 28, 2007
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Cherry-Watermelon-Tang-Lemon-Limade, Anyone?
| I'm incredibly thirsty. I did not just exercise, or sit in a sauna, or eat an extremely salty dish of food. I'm just craving some form of liquid to quench impending dehydration. Wait! What are you insinuating?! That I am incapable of satisfying my own thirst?! That my own foolishness is the cause of this parched throat?! That I might as well go and drink a carton of dishwashing liquid?! Well, sir! I will!.........so there!!! |
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May. 25, 2007
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New! Improved! (In some's opinion...)
| I just changed my template. The pink polka-dots were getting a little annoying. |
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May. 25, 2007
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Cliched cliches
| Contest! Got a cliche you know of? Post it as a comment along with YOUR version (i.e., CLICHE:Think outside the box! MY VERSION: Don't try to cipher with your head inside a cardboard cube!). I'll post the funniest ones in an upcoming entry! Please don't send any after the 29th of this month—I'm going on vacation on the 30th and won't be back for three weeks! May the superior competitor suceed! |
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May. 25, 2007
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Unfortunate Squirrels
| My dog is an amusing sight. He enjoys the relentless pursuit of those furred rodent cousins that reside in tall, spreading pines. Unfortunately, they also become euphoric at the sight of him--because they love sitting high above his snapping mandibles, teasing him with twitching tails and squeaking mouths. He can leap and bark for hours on the clock, no matter how futile the chance of actually catching the squirrel. Poor, empty-headed puppy. Tragic, the way he frantically races along the fence after the bushy-tailed creatures, completely oblivious to anything else, like the tool shed in front of him. Poor, injured, empty-headed puppy. Tsk-tsk--those squirrels always get his goat. Poor, injured, chewed-on, empty-headed puppy. He'll never learn that he just can't catch a squirrel in his condition. |
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May. 17, 2007
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Don't Even Start!!
| My deepest apologies. My wonderful computer has been blocking my valiant attempts to post entries. I have to leave—there's a thunder storm coming. Forgive me! |
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Apr. 11, 2007
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Shadow Lillian
| I apologize for my incredible lack of entries since January. I am posting this to let everyone know...my cat died this morning. I wasn't totally shocked—she was eighteen years old, and she had a kidney problem—but, having had her for seven years, it seems surreal to see her lying in a box in our computer room. It's a crazily barbaric event to lose a pet. (No, I am not going to write that cliche about having a hole in my heart!) People show that grief in myriad different ways. My sister kept cutting off pieces of the cat's fur, and my little brothers bawled. Yet, only a few saline drops found their way out of my 'lovely lanterns'. — You start to explore the tunnels in your spirit, attempting to discover what and why after you have been through a disturbing experience. You end up opening secret passegeways to different rooms, and you can sometimes find answers there. Sometimes you can't. We wish we could have the keys to every room, so that we could find all of the answers...but, even if we unlocked every little space, all of those anwers would still be absent. We don't have them. Jesus does. We want answers, we ask Him for them, and sometimes He gives them to us. But, other times, He doesn't. Why? Once, when Corrie ten Boom was a little girl, she asked her father a question about a very mature subject. Instead of repremanding her, he pointed to his traveling-case. 'Pick it up,' he told her. Corrie tried, and couldn't. 'Father, it's too heavy!' she said to him. Her father reached over and lifted it easily. 'You see, Corrie,' he told her, 'some burdens are to heavy for you to bear—like the answer to your question. That is why I must carry them for you.' — I think that most of the anwers that we seek would be too heavy for us to carry. That's why Jesus carries them for us. We might think that it would be easier if we knew everything. Unfortunately, the weight of that knowledge would crush our souls. It's like when your friend confides a secret in you, one that you would never tell anyone. You begin to feel the heaviness of that secret over time. Imagine if you knew every secret that there is to know! It would be too much. That's why Jesus bears the burden for us. |
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Feb. 18, 2007
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Oooo! Ahhh!
| Step right up, ladies and gentlemen! You, too! Yes, you—and your friend there. Come and see the amazing lost blogger! Yes, friends, for only—ahem—ten dollars, you can read her latest entry, written an entire month after her last one!! What are you waiting for? Step right up! |
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Jan. 5, 2007
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Lost at Sea...
| To anyone who discovers this message...to any friend who has been crying out as to why I haven't written since December tenth...let me tell you. Our internet got shut down during this big stoem and the company took two weeks to get it working again!! That's all I have to say. |
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Dec. 10, 2006
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I'M LEAVING!!!!!!!!
| To Whom it May Concern: I am Embarking, as of To-day, on a Noble Quest, one that shall take me upon many Grand Adventures. This Quest is one that No-one has ever dared to attempt before—a Quest of such Great Importance that one must prepare oneself for it Months in Advance. One must simulate all Perils that one is likely to encounter on such a Quest in order to be Ready. I have, on Account of Much School-work, neglected to prepare for this Quest as much as one should. Fortunately, I have many, many Companions whom have gathered all required Items, including those which will be Useful to one such as Me. And so, I Depart on this Quest of All Quests to the Noble Region of Pagosa Springs. And, if we Meet not Again, I bid you Good Health, Happiness, and God-speed! K.T.G.A., Esquire |
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Nov. 24, 2006
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Happy Thanksgiving (a day late)!
| Oooohhhh, I'm so glad I don't have to eat this much every day!! I'm STILL full. I actually fell asleep at 6:03 pm yesterday—with our friends big-screen tv turned up to about 500 decibles during the Broncos vs. Cheifs game! But, I had a great time anyway. Happy Thanksgiving!! |
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Nov. 11, 2006
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Yay!!
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Oct. 31, 2006
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Fall Festival
| Well, here it is at last: Halloween. So many people are compromising their faith today by wearing gory or scary costumes, decorating their houses with monsters and graves, and watching horror movies. Satan is doing his worst work on this day, and what are we doing? Going right along!! We need to make a stand for righteousness—otherwise, our neighborhoods and towns will continue their moral erosion. Several churches in my area are hosting Fall Festivals—an autumn celebration full of games, fun, and God. One motto a church has adopted for this activity is "Taking the Night Back for Jesus." I encourage anyone out there to remember our duty as Christ-followers and start a similar tradition at your own church. Please, don't ignore this! Many, many people have come to God through this program, and hopefully many more—with your help. |
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Oct. 27, 2006
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Accountability!!
| I am making a commitment, as of now, to write at least ONE entry every week. I need YOU to help me!! If I fail to write anything in a certain week, leave me nasty comments and nagging reminders so I feel extremely guilty!!! If I do not write anything in a month, send vicious junkyard dogs after me! And if nothing is posted within a year, presume me dead and find a different blog to loiter about. Thanks ever so much! |
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Oct. 27, 2006
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Oh, the Weather Outside is Frightful...
| There are snowmen in the yards/There is frost on the cars/Happy children play each and every day in the snow! Oookay, I don't know the name of that song, but I think I heard it on the radio. We received 26 beautiful inches of it yesterday! ( Kara, if you're reading this, be jelous!! ) And, the best part is, we have yesterday and today off from school!! Oh go and scream with envy!! I don't care!! I'm going out in the snow!! |
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Oct. 23, 2006
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Ooodles of Noodles!!
| Lasagna!! Spagetti! Pizza! (Wait a minute...) Okay, so pizza isn't a noodle. Please pay no attention to the former and latter comments. I have no idea why I wrote them. My sister is currently hitting me with a magazine, so maybe some brain cells are on leave in the bahamas. Sooooooo...maybe I'll go take a nap. But don't leave!! I know you! The second you finish reading this, you'll frolic off to do some random act of weirdness! But, if you stay here...well. There's no TELLING what might happen! A fly could land on your face, or your annoying neighbor could stop by for a wonderfully long visit! So, just keep on waiting... |
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Oct. 13, 2006
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Drag the Dot
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Sep. 24, 2006
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Congratulations!!
| I am pleased to announce the WINNER of my little puzzle! InfoJunkie, AKA Pam, used her infinately fact-fertile intellect to crack the code! And since she was just one of the TWO PEOPLE who responded, it doesn't give her that much to rise above. WHAT HAPPENED?!?! Don't you people love me?! HUH?! Shame, shame! I mean, come on, it doesn't hurt to guess! Perhaps it has something to do with there being no reward for a right guess. But there IS a reward! It's getting recognized on this esteemed and highly- read blog! Or isn't that enough for you? Again, shame! I am apalled at your behavior! Not receiving a prize for your efforts causes you to decide not to guess at all! I'm crushed. Just leave. Oh fine, don't! It doesn't matter! I'm still ashamed of you. |
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Sep. 20, 2006
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JUST PEACHY!!!!!!!
| Oh, how can I stand this torture?! My blog title was brown, so I re-loaded the template...and now, my precious pets are gone!! Oh, the irony! Oh, the despair! Just leave me to DIE!! ( No, I won't actually die on account of virtual pets. I'm not THAT sentimental.) Well. At least I still have my real pets! 'And.....who are they exactly?' you ask? Aspen is my <3 "cute nittle fanoobst" <3 (I have, LITTERALLY, 523 nicknames for him just like that.) - he's my golden retriever. Then, there's Blackie, aka Blik, aka Little Charred Sausage, aka It. He is the cutest fat cat in the universe!! Shadow doesn't have many nicknames, just Badow and Kitten. She's our resident Queen of Cats. Of course, we can't forget Mop! He's also Moppy, Mopso, Moppalina, Moppalina-Loodle, and Elvis. He da baddest guinea pig evah! Seriously, that's his attitude. He has long white hair that he flips out of his eyes! CUTE!!!!!!! I love my pets enormously!! |
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Sep. 17, 2006
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The Puzzle of the Century!
| Oh, all right, it's not the puzzle of the century. Or the decade. Or the year. Okay, fine, it's not even the puzzle of the week. Bear with me. This puzzle is an incredibly long acronym (the first letters of a scentance). Anyone can make a guess as to what the acronym stands for. You have until this Wednsday to leave a comment with your answer. And now...the puzzle of the day! (Don't laugh, you hypocrite!!) "....HCYAWJWDIYDKWHD?...."(Hint: It has something to do with Jesus.) |
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Sep. 16, 2006
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New Blogger!
| Well, I know that all of my readers are bored beyond human comprehension while reading my entries (no contradictory comments, IF you please!), so, I have a more interesting blog for you to read: lovetodance29. Oh, don't pretend you'll still come back to MY blog-I know where your real alligence lies! Alright, now I'm sobbing like a baby. I'm not ashamed to admit it! Go on, go! She IS my cousin, you know. I will rest easier knowing that you have seen her blog. |
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Sep. 9, 2006
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Finally!!
| Joy! Bliss! Wonderful and indescribable feelings! I have, at long last, succeeded in changing my profile picture from rocking chairs to a tiger (with help from my pal leopardlover)! Rejoice with me! Praise God! Squirt silly string all over your local YMCA! (Oh, alright, DON'T. You will regret doing it when the YMCA director forces you to scrub the faux rock climbing wall for two hours.) But do something to celebrate my happiness!! |
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Sep. 7, 2006
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Medival Attributions
| Greetings and a blessing upon thy fair head, friend! Cans't thou grasp the infinate and undisputed inner meaning of me vocalizations put out upon this honest air? Fie on thy accquintance in the event of their whispers of treason and defiance projected at my innocence! Reason and motives are lacking within thy horrible and distrustful tastes in company if thou hast comrades of that villainous sort! A pox! Departure is but one ripping section contained in me narrative! Fare well in this fruitless earth! |
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Sep. 4, 2006
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OOPS!!
| I forgot to tell everyone-I had my birthday on August 20th! But of course, they changed that accursed driving-age law, so I must curb (ha, ha, no pun intended!) my urge to get behind the wheel until next year. Yes, I heard you-breathing a sigh of fevered relief! I'm crushed, I tell you! My heart has been wrought from my chest and cast into an abyss of endless dispair. Please, cease your mistrustful oral projections! I pledge to be the most courtious and cautious driver, on the road and off! (I heard you laugh! Go on, say that you don't believe me! I shall prove you wrong!) Farewell, constructively critizizing human beings! |
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Sep. 3, 2006
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Amazing Discoveries!
| The other day (oh, all right-yesterday), I was doing my devotions when something hit me-no, NOT literally! I had been beating myself to a pulp for slacking on my preperations for the beginning of the school year, when God pointed out that I was relying far too much on myself-I wasn't giving my burdens to Him. So, I have been trying to come before Him every day and talking to Him about my troubles. What grace! He has helped me realize that He is the Rock that I can lean against any time I need to. Praise the Lord!! |
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Sep. 3, 2006
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New Pets!!
| Hello animal lovers!! I am happy to announce that I have adopted several virtual pets from Bunnyhero Labs!! Please feel free to play with and feed them-they love the attention! (And, by the way, did you notice that they're all pink?) |
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Sep. 3, 2006
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Amnesia Attack!!
| I cannot beleive myself. How hypocritical! I promised myself that I'd write every other day-yet, here I am, practically rupturing my voicebox by way of harsh reprimands to myself. Please, save your stern words! Can't you see that I already feel horrible?! This is no excuse, but I have been ploughing-er, crawling-through a book entitled "War and Peace". It is, by far, one of the longest, yet most interesting, books of my acquaintance. It is my first priority every day to read one hundred pages of this volume (which, I might add, is 696 pages abridged). Alas, this is before any other form of informative entertainment-including blogging. And so-I beg your forgiveness, good people! Do not condemn me as I depart once more for the land of 18th-century literature! |
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Jul. 31, 2006
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Fantasy and Facts
| I have an important announcement: For those of you that enjoy reading fantasy stories, I am currently working on one that I hope to post as a serial in the future. As you will soon find out, I am a fount of useless information and facts. Just a warning for those of you that delight in a lack of informative and/or educational tidbits in a blog. Protect yourselves! Close your eyes and cry out against me! Threaten to force-feed me Grandma Jo's fruitcake! You cannot silence me! Sorry. I got a little out of control there. By the way, did you know that the oldest cat that ever lived was 43? |
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Jul. 30, 2006
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A Life of Torturous Unfairness
| Ahhhh....who doesn't enjoy a relaxing afternoon cleaning one's room? You may find yourself shocked as you discover that I, myself, loathe this popular task. Please try to understand...I am just one of those bizzare people that would rather do anything than chores. Perhaps this might put it in perspective: You have just visited your local library, obtaining a book that you have been longing to read since time had meaning (okay...I do exaggerate a bit). You recline in a deliciously comfortable La-Z-Boy and turn to the title page—"Honeyyyy! I need you to work on that room of yours!" You do your best to project your frustated verbalizations to the part of the house from which your parent is calling you. Unfortounately, he/she does not appreciate your unenthusiastic response, and so, forces you into four hours of spirit-breaking labor. Unfortunately, this description of psychological torture only scratches the surface of it all. And so, I leave you, to perform yet another mind-numbing task... |
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About Me
In an unfortunate and completely unintended popcorn accident, the owner of this blog has become psycologically infirm. Although she may seem unobtrusive, she can rant for paragraphs on end and to an intense degree. Do NOT, under any desperate and unavoidable circumstances, read her entries, or you, dear friend, will become an insane human being not unlike her. |
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I'm writing this on a friend's computer, so I can do SMILIES!!!!
( I have a Mac, so normally, I can't do it.) Oooo yay!!!
I am so excited that I'm annoying!!!! So, because I never get to do smilies, I'll do a million!! hey, go to my friend's new blog!! Her name's 
