If you ask anyone who know's me, if I keep my home clean. They would most likely say, "yes."

But its not always as clean as I or my dh (dear husband) would like it to be.  My dh complains to me frequently about this. So what do I do? I dig my heels in and let the house get WORSE! This is really not a very good attitude for me to have.

Shouldn't I want to avoid hearing my husband complain about the house?  YES!

Shouldn't I want to please my husband? YES!

Shouldn't I strive to be the helpmeet I was created to be? YES!

Afterall high standards are a good thing. So why have my standards for other people been so high and for myself so low?  

Because I have been double minded (Psalm 12:2, James 1:8, 4:8) and a hypocrite(Proverbs 11:9, Matthew 7:5, Luke 6:42)!

Ouch, you may say. Don't be so harsh on yourself, afterall I haven't had a chance yet. :-) But there is really no sense in beating around the bush. Sin is sin, so let's call it that. And even for reasons that I am unaware of I have taken personal offense at the way my dh tells me he wants things done around here. 

By my actions of NOT cleaning the house, I have tried to force my dh to change his behavior, attitudes, outlooks on life, and...well...everything about himself that *I* consider to be bad or quirky. Which is really foolish of me. Dh is just as stubborn if not more so than I am and the more I dig my heels in, the more he digs his in! lol God really has chosen a great man for me. 

If something has to change it deffinately needs to be me. If I really want him to change then I need to accept the way he is now and love him the way he is now, because if I don't I will only keep building unnecessary bitterness and resentment toward him. Jesus loves him just the way he is, why can't I? Afterall I loved him enough to marry him just the way he is.  

"But he knowing their thoughts, said unto them, EVERY KINGDOM DIVIDED AGAINST ITSELF IS BROUGHT TO DESOLATION; AND A HOUSE DIVIDED AGAINST A HOUSE FALLETH."

This is a good verse for me to remember before I challenge my husband's authority.

Reading in Matthew 10 (at least 6 months ago) I came across something that the Lord has not let me forget and laid on my heart to look further into.

Matthew 10 : 38-39  KJV   

" And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me. He that findeth his life shall lose it; and he that looseth his life for my sake shall find it."

Our culture is so much about "searching within ourselves" and "finding ourselves." With movies like "How Stella Got Her Grove Back",  and, "Bridget Jones' Diary" where the leading ladies shed their morals (if they had them to begin with) and "free themselves" to "live their life "HOW THEY REALLY WANT TO," its been hard for me not to get sucked into this femmenist way of thinking in the past. For even Jesus said that "he who finds his life shall lose it." Talking of course about losing our eternal life for the mementary pleasures of the flesh.

 Fortunately,    the Lord has shown me His Grace and as I have been growing more in the Lord these last few years, I have been personally convicted by just how "worldly" I have been. Usually when I try to change a bad habit or attitude, I notice how hard it really is to change. I have either stopped trying to change immediately or I stop slowly--holding onto what I had previously considered important. Each day becomming a little less important until my convictions are completely gone and I forget about it.

Really, its a sad state to be in.

Looking up the word CROSS in The New Strong's Exhaustive Concordance, the word only appears in the New Testament, starting in Matthew 10 : 38. Appearing 28 times total.

Naturally there would be some scripture about the cross Jesus was crucified on. But to my surprise the meanings for those passages holds the same meaning that Jesus Himself referenced when talking about us all dying to ourselves.

The Greek word for CROSS is 4716, stauros, (stow-ros') from the base of 2476; a stake or post (as set upright), ie, specifically, a pole or cross (as an instrument of capital punishment); Figuratively, exposure to death, ie self denial; by implication, the attonement of christ:--cross

2476 meanshistemi, (his'-tay-mee); a prol foprm of a prim. Stao (stah'-o) (of the same meaning, and used for it in certain tenses); to stand ()trans or intrans), used in various applications (lit or fig) :-abide, apoint, bring, continue, covenant, establish, hold up, lay, present, set (up), stanch, stand (by forth, still, up).

So just from looking at the scripture in Matthew 10:38 and the greek words, I think it is pretty obvious that we are to stand up against sin and die to self by carrying our figurative crosses. But I do think that it is always good to have other scriptures to go with a theme, so below are the rest of the scriptures which mention dying to self by way of carrying our cross.

Matthew 16:24    "

Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me."

Mark 8 : 34-38

"And when he had called the people unto him with his disciples also, he said unto them, whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. (35) For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall have it. (36) For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and his own soul?(37) or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul? (38) Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ahsmed when He cometh in the glory of His Father with the Holy Angels."

Mark 10:21

" Then Jesus beholding him, loved him, and said unto him, 'One thing thou lackest; go thy way, sell whatever thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven; and come, take up the cross, and follow me.' "

Luke 9:23-27

" And he said to them all, 'If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me. (24) For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it. (25) For what is a man advantaged, if he gain the whole world, and lose himself, or be cast away? (26) For whosoever shall be ashamed of me and of my words, of him shall the Son of man be ashamed when He shall come in His own Glory, and in His Father's, and of the Holy Angels. (27) But I tell you of a truth, there be some standing here, which shall not taste of death, till they see the kingdom of God."

Luke 14: 27

"And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple."

1 Corinthians 1:17-18

"For Christ sent me not to baptize, but to preach the gospel: not with wisdom of words, lest the cross of Christ should be made of none effect. (18) For the preaching of the cross is to them that perish foolishness; but unto us which are saved it is the power of God."

Galatians 5:11

"And I, brethren, if I yet preach cirumcision, why do I yet suffer persecution? Then is the offence of the cross ceased."

Galatians 6:12

" As many as desire to make fair shew in the flesh, they constrain you to be circumcised; only lest they should suffer persecution for the cross of Christ."

Ephesians 2:16

"And that he might reconsile both unto God in one body by the cross, hasving slain the enmity thereby."

Philippians 2:8

"And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross."

Hebrews 12:1-2

"Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnessess, let is lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, (2) Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God. "

That is a powerful bunch of scripture! It gets me thinking about how I have (or haven't) been carrying my cross. Have I carried my cross today? Was it only a small effort on my part by letting the Lord carry the brunt of the weight? Or was it truely me who was carrying it? I am inspired to the the right thing, no matter how much it hurts!

Instead of asking if you've had your milk today ask this,

Have you carried your cross today?

The Life Of A Loving Wife

If I treat others with loving encouragement,
But sweet words to my husband are totally absent.
If I do not speak in love to him, proving he is adored,
I am like fingernails scraped across a chalkboard.

If I raise my children, and keep the house,
I may think of myself as a wonderful spouse.
But I am not following God's command,
If I do not show love to my husband.

Love takes time to listen to my husband,
Love looks for ways to serve my husband,
Love does not ask my husband to spend all of his time in labor,
Because I so envy the things of my neighbor.

Love does not talk badly about my husband until his heart aches,
Love does not push his buttons and remind him of past mistakes,
Love looks for the truth and admits when I am wrong,
Love looks for ways to make our marriage strong.

Love puts up with morning breath, the passing of gas,
And even the dwindling of romance.
Love looks toward the days of sitting on the porch in a rocking chair,
While holding hands with our heads bowed in prayer.

Love never fails. Our hearing and eyesight may fail, and our health will fail,
But deep love for my husband never will.

When I was a child, I believed in fairytails.
I searched for prince charming but to no avail.
As a woman, I realized I needed faith, hope, and love,
All of these gifts are given from above.

The longer I live, I realize in my life,
The greatest blessing of all is the love between a husband and a wife.

-Diane Ellison

Sunday Morning

As I wait for my husband in the car with my kids,
I glance over at the time and see 10:40.
My kids yelling in the back round,
"Mom, honk the horn:
(I remember ... Love is patient)

As he enters the car in his favorite plaid shirt
that I keep trying to hide from him
(I think... Love is kind)

As we pass the pearl white, 5-series, BMW,
in our family mobile
(I remember ... Love does not envy)

As I am tempted to ask why he is running late because I am the one who got all the kids ready this morning and his outfit didn't take a lot of planning
(I tell myself ... Love does not boast and is not rude)

As we Sunday cruise to church,
I count the minutes
and every car speeding by
(I repeat... Love is not easily angered)

As I sit in the passenger seat, clenching my Bible in my hands,
praying and hoping that there will be a seat left,
trusting that everything will work out,
and knowing that once again I will have persevered
through another Sunday morning,
(I remember to thank God for his love.)

-Cindy Monzon

1 Corinthians 13 For The Christian Wife

I can put a "Honey-Do" with his honeydew in his lunchbag;
But if I have not patience I'm just another nag.

I can gas at his gas and speak my mind;
But if I send him to the couch I'm just being unkind.

We can pay alot for the lot in the new housing tract;
But I must then be content as a matter of fact.

I can hem up the hem on my new black dress;
But if I go too high I'm just trying to impress.

We can can pay our fare for the fair and have fun and be loud;
But if we spend too much to win the plush we are just being proud.

I can buy a washer to fix the washer at the hardware store;
But if I'm rude when he gets home it's just another chore.

I can have a beef with the beef that is in my dish;
But if I don't fix his favorite I'm just being selfish.

I can be blue over the blue that he picked for the wall;
But if I scream and shout that really shows some gall.

I can be bored with the board game that he loves to play;
But I can't remind him of his loss day after day.

I can know whether the weather will be cold or hot;
But if I tell him wrong that's an evil plot.

I can loose my ring and wring my hands until he returns;
But when I tell the truth, he will share in my concerns.

All these things are possible but not profitable for the Christian wife,
Love protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres through all life's strife.

-Melissa Jones

I was chatting with a friend the other day and we were talking about how I could love homemaking more. I thought I would make a catchy little something to help me stay focused! So here it is, for all of you!

The 3 "G"s of Homemaking

1. GO to bed early each night, and with a deliberate vision about what tomorrow is going to look like.

2. GET busy in the Lord when having sinful thoughts (like grumbling). Thinking/giving my mind something else to focus on will help me stay focused on the task at hand.

3. GET help from older women or a pastor/elder in your church if things still don't improve.

I have been keeping a journal lately for certain reasons, which also is helping me to stay focused on what and why I am doing. I bought the journal about 7 years ago just because it was pretty and never used it. I guess the Lord had something in mind for it even though I didn't.

The cover says this:

DON'T QUIT

Don't quit when the tide is lowest,

For it's just about to turn;

Don't quit over doubts and questions,

For there's something you may learn.

Don't quit when the night is darkest,

For it's just a while 'til dawn;

Don't quit when you've run the farthest,

For the race is almost won.

Don't quit when the hill is steepest,

For your goal is almost nigh;

Don't quit, for you're not a failure

Until you fail to try. By Jill Wolf

" On the eighth day, when it was time to circumcise him, he was named Jesus, the name the angel had given him before he had been conceived.

     When the time of their purification according to the Law of Moses had been completed, Joseph and Mary took him to Jerusalem to present him to the Lord (as it is written in the Law of the Lord, "Every firstbornmale is to be consecrated to the Lord") and to offer a sacrifice in keeping with what is said in the Law of the Lord: " a pair of doves or two young pigeons."

     Now there was a man in Jerusalem called Simeon, who was roghteous and devout. He was waiting for the consolation of Israel, and the Holy Spirit was upon him. It had been revealed to him by the Holy Spirit that he would not die before he had seen the Lord's Christ. Moved by the Spirit, he went into the temple courts. When the parents brought in the child Jesus to do for him what the custom of the Law required, Simeon took him in his arms and praised God, saying,

"Sovereign Lord, as you have promised,

   you now dismiss your servant in peace.

For my eyes have seen your salvation,

   which you have prepared in the sight of all people

a light for revelation to the Gentiles

   and for glory to your people Israel."

The child's father and mother marveled at what was said about him. Then Simeon blessed them and said to Mary, his mother, "This child is destined to cause the falling and rising of many in Israel, and to be a sign that will be spoken against, so that the thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your own soul too."

     There was also a prophetess, Anna, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was very old; she had lived with her husband seven years after her marriage, and then was widowed until she was eighty-four. She never left the temple but worshipped night and day, fasting and praying. Comming up to them at that very moment, she gave thanks to God and spoke about the child to all who were looking forward to the redemption of Jerusalem.

     When Joseph and Mary had done everything required by the Law of the Lord, they returned to Galilee to their own town of Nazereth. And the child grew and became strong; he was filled with wisdom and the grace of God was upon him."

"The heavens declare the glory of God;

the skies proclaim the work of his hands.

Day after day they pour forth speech;

night after night they display knowledge.

There is no speech or language

where their voice is not heard.

Their voice goes out into all the earth,

their words to the ends of the world.

In the heavens he has pitched a tent for the sun,

which is like a bridegroom coming forth from his pavillion,

like a champion rejoicing to run his course.

It rises at one end of the heavens and makes its circuit to the other;

nothing is hidden from its heat.

The law of the Lord is perfect,

reviving the soul.

The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy,

making wise the simple.

The precepts of the Lord are right,

giving light to the eyes.

The fear of the Lord is pure,

enduring forever.

The ordinances of the Lord are sure and altogether righteous.

They are more precious than gold,

than much pure gold;

they are sweeter than honey,

than honey from the comb.

By them is your servant warned;

in keeping them there is great reward.

Who can discern his errors?

Forgive me hidden faults.

Keep your servant also from willful sins;

may they not rule over me.

Then will I be blameless,

innocent of great transgression.

May the words of my mouth and the mediation of

my heart

be pleasing in your sight,

O Lord, my rock and my redeemer."

This passage was read at church yesterday. As the passage leading into a time of confessions for the congregation. It really touched my heart.

In verse 12 it says, "Who can discern his errors? Forgive my hidden faults." And I began to ponder. How true that is for sins to be hidden in our heart. Even before this passage was read. Just as the confessions was mentioned, I was thinking that I wasn't sure if I had anything to confess. Nothing that I had done wrong. I silently asked the Lord to show me if I had anything I needed to bring to him. And I did.

How many times I have forgotten past sins and hid them away? I do not know. But God does. I don't want to hide anything from anyone. But I do. After all, sin wouldn't be sin if everyone flaunted it.

O, Lord! Search my heart and show me my sins so that I may confess them unto you continually!  Amen

Hello there,

Thank you for taking the time to read my entries! A little bit about me. I'm a wife and mother to one (so far). And I hope to be sharing with you all the ups and downs that life brings.

I would like to start off today with a little scripture reading and it really sums up how my life has been.  Its my favorite passage and can really lift my spirits in times of need. :)

Psalm 42 (niv)

As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When can I go and meet with God? My tears have been my food day and night, while men say to me all day long, "Where is your God?" These things I remember as I pour out my soul: how I used to go with the multitude, leading the procession to the house og God, with shouts of joy and thanksgiving among the festive throng. Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my savior and my God. My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember you from the land of the Jordan, the heights of Hermon-from Mount Mizar. Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me. By day the Lord directs his love, at night his songis with me-a prayer to the God of my life. I say to God my Rock-"Why have you forgotten me? Why must I go about mourning, oppressed by the enemy?" My bones suffer mortal agony as my foes taunt me, saying to me all day long, "Where is your God?" Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why are you so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my savior and my God.