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I really love Valentines Day. Even though my Valentine is thousands of miles away, I enjoy anything about L-O-V-E. I know some people say its just another Hallmark holiday, but I like to see it as another opportunity to show the love of Christ, especially to those closest to us. After all, God is love. I especially try to make this day special for my kids. The boys both woke me up with sweet greetings of ,"Happy Valentine's Day Mommy!" They even had a gift for me. My mother-in-law bought it. It was a sweet journal that I had been eyeing. I've been wanting a special journal just to write down things about the boys, for instance funny things they say, places we go, or things we do together. I truly cherish my time with them. One day they will grow older and not want to spend so much time with me, oh how pray that day never comes. I think homeschoolers have the chance to really understand how important family is, and not forsake that gift. I'd really like to continue to strive for strong relational bonds with our children. Since my husband is often away, more than he is home, it is important to me that the kids and I remain close. I never want them to feel isolated or alone with Daddy away. They are so resiliant and understanding. I am working hard to appreciate the masculine attributes that God has instilled in them. Sometimes the output of the attributes is more for me to handle. or I sadly admit gets on my nerves. The Lord has been reminding me of why he created "man" and how different men are from women. He has been making me acutely aware of the fact that my giving into irriation is not valid, and I must have self-control. I stop and try to ask myself before the , "stop this or that" come out of my mouth, is what he is doing or saying wrong? Is what he is doing or saying offensive? Just because I don't like something, does it make it bad? What are my child's intentions at this moment? Certainly, there is a time for certain behavior, and then for some behavior the time is never appropriate, because somethings are flat out wrong. However, understanding what is truly going on in a situation, and being intuitive enough to know how to respond is extremely pertinent to how the child will carry on in the future. No one likes to be nagged, certainly not a male from a female, including sons being nagged by their mother. I do not want my son to cringe ever time I open my mouth to speak to him, in which case, he doesn't do such a thing, but I certainly do not want that to ever be the case. There is something said for letting boys be boys. That of course does not include excusing inappropriate behavior. An example in my own life with my older son is he is a born leader. He loves to be in charge. That in and of itself is not a bad thing. It is a godly attribute bestowed upon a male. What can turn out to be a negative factor in all of this though is that my son can come off quite bossy, and even a know it all. While that I realize that is not my sons intention, it can be unnerving to be around someone like that. God has been showing me that they way I direct my sons behavior can make all the difference. When I catch him in midstream "leader cycle", as I call it, instead of jumping on him for being bossy and publicly embarrassing him, I calmly stop him. I'll maybe touch his arm, or come in close to him. I'll say something softly like, "Son, God has given you a wonderful strength. You are going to be a great leader someday. However, sweetheart, for right now we're amongst family and friends. It would be great if you toned it down a bit. " I'll gently remind him as well that people don't like to be told what to do all of the time, and to let people make their own mistakes. He seems to understand those types of comments, we build our relationship that way, and he is receptive. He is a helper, and dislikes greatly for people to fail. He wants success for all, and if he thinks he knows how to help that person achieve it, then he will dive right in. There is so much good in all of that, it just takes training. Praise you Lord Jesus for showing me just how to be the best mom I can be for my sons. |
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