Yesterday we sang "Blessed Be the Name" at church. That song is such a powerful statement of our faith.  That song and the verse that matches it ...

"The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away, blessed be the name of the Lord"-Job 1:21

have been like a banner for me, a standard to continually lift.  The boys and I read the story of Job a couple of weeks ago. We talked about how satan had to have permission to test Job. We discussed how Job had no idea why things were happening to him. Who would have thought that just a couple weeks later we would have our own experiences to go through?

Saturday, the boys went out to take care of animals. They discovered something had killed a bunch of our birds. We lost all our baby chicks that we bought and hatched out, except 1. We lost one of the 2 babies a mother hen was raising. We also lost all our baby ducks. Daron said he felt like Job. These were their babies. We were in shock at the carnage. As we buried those birds we cried and wondered why. That night even though we thought we had the coop secure- we lost the rest of our babies, the mama hen, and our female adult duck. We had to go back over the coop and find every weak area.

My boys have had such tough lessons to learn. I never went through what these boys have when I was a kid. But I just have to embrace that God knows the other side. He sees them and loves them more than I ever could. He is passionate for them. It seems so crazy that God allows these things but then I look at the whole picture. This world is just a stepping stone into the next. It is just a little blip on eternity. He is God and He has said it is ok. I know there are people out there who might say "Well, if that is how He is I don't want anything to do with Him." They would like to accept only good like a child and not have any discipline or challenges in their life. Like spoiled children that never have a hard day or have anyone challenge their authority, they would like to live. They want to live in the pretend world where bad things only happen to others and never to them, where it only rains on the naughty but not the nice.

What power there is in singing that song with a broken heart, a heart longing to praise Him even when we don't understand. Some days I have stood in silence, cried, and eventually whispered those words. Some days I can sing the song all the way through. But every time I sing it my voice catches as I say those words...

"...Blessed be Your name, when I'm found in the desert place, though I walk through the wilderness, blessed by Your name...

...Every blessing You pour out, I'll turn back to praise, when the darkness closes in, Lord still I will say Blessed be the name of the Lord...

...Blessed be Your name, on the road marked with suffering, though there's pain in the offering, blessed be Your name..."

I want them to be real words... not lightly spoken words that I sing and then whine about later. This Sunday, as I sang, my voice caught as I prepared to sing them. I was thinking about all we've been through and how much I miss my Dad. I glanced to my right and saw the most holy private moment in my middle son's life. The words of the song hit him and he covered his face at the impact of it. He couldn't sing the song. The words caught. I knew in that instant that satan was questioning Will's faith.

"What do you believe... do you accept what is happening and then have the gall to stand here in church and sing? Might you like to reconsider your options?"

What a creep he is to attack a young boy. But what a privilege that God has found Will and the other boys worthy to suffer. He has looked down from heaven and said, "Have you considered My servants, those crazy boys that live in the woods?"  I can boast in my Father's promises,

'If we are faithless, He will remain faithful, for He cannot disown himself.' (2 Tim 2:13)

'He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus' (Phil 1:6)

Like our spiritual lives, we have to strengthen and correct our weak areas. We will review whether we even should be doing what we were (raising chicks in the woods).  We will have to make some decisions about what to do now. But in all of it, God doesn't change. He loves us passionately.

My grace in sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.' (2 Cor. 12:9-10)