I have been busy setting up my other blog, and have been feeling uneasy about it.  There are various reasons why.  One of them being that I am finding out that people can be judgemental about a decision I make, and they don't even know me, nor do I truly know them.  I am, by nature, a kind individual, and very understanding, and what you see of me in my blog is what I am like in the real world.  I don't make believe that I care about someone, when in reality I don't.  I guess this doesn't apply to others though, and this of course sets me up for a fall.  I decided to change my blog for the simple reason that this one I can't even access most of the time.  It is truly frustrating!!  My decision to move blogs, resulted in a change from the one I was going to use, because someone didn't like it.  So I changed it to blogspot.  It was more user friendly for me anyway.  So I got to thinking, why would I allow someone to tell me what I can and cannot do, although I am sure this person meant it in a nice way.  Or did they, I don't know.  I don't even really know them, though I thought I did.

Last night, I was lying in bed crying over my dog who is very, very sick and may in fact, need to be put down.  And I got to thinking about blogging, and felt in my heart that I need to leave the blogging world entirely.  I spend too much time thinking "oh, I have to update my blog", or "I wonder if I have any comments" or "Why can't I get my blog to look like that!"  or worst of all, comparing myself to others and being let down that I am not, and can't even meausure up.  Everyone else seems to have it all together; wonderful productive homeschools, simple lifestyles, able to cook and keep thier home clean and tidy and welcoming, all at the same time.  Well, I am not any of this.  But that won't happen to me by reading anyone else's blog, or life story.  God and I have to make mine, and I have lost sight of that.

I don't have a lot of friends in real life.  I am not an outgoing extovert who meets people easily.  So I enjoy chatting with others and sharing in their life. And sharing mine.  But I just feel that my contentment needs to be in God and my family, and not in blogging to the whole wide world and having that be in the fore front of my mind all the time. 

So, what am I going to do?  Well, I am going to close down my new blog.  I have been fishing for ways in order to make this whole blog thing easier, and it has just been harder.  The whole incident with this other blogger has hurt me a great deal, but I am a big girl and I will get over it.  I will keep this blog open for a while until I am 100% certain as to what I want to do.  Then I maybow out gracefully, and get back to my real life job, which is trying to be the best mom and wife I can be, and the best teacher.  If anyone would like to keep in touch, please email me, so I can have your email address.  I plan on visiting blogs and so on, as I have made some wonderful friends, and I am so glad that they have stuck by and read my boring stories and rants!  Right now, things in my home are very stresssed, and we are all very sad about our dog, and that is what I am focusing on.

I have definitely decided to move into a new blog, I just have too many problems getting into this one, and it is frustrating!  My new blog will be at www.HoneysuckleHollow.blogspot.com  It is separate from my business one, and much more easy to use, at least for me!   I will be adding stuff to it as I have time, there are a couple of entries there now, though nothing earth shattering!

Sorry!  Indecision may, or may not be, my problem!  LOL!

I was just sitting down to do school this morning, when I got a phone message from a lady who runs a shop I sell my soap in.  It is a little stained glass and craft shop in a small Scottish town, where we all have really nice booths which we pay a monthly fee for.  On Sunday morning, at 4:30 AM, a fire erupted in the bakery next door, and it is totally gutted!  It burned inot the store where my soap is also, there is a lot of soot and smoke damage, not to mention water damage.  Thankfully, my friend and her daughter and the rest of the tenants in the apartments upstairs were safe, but my friend lost part of her apartment ( mostly her bathroom, I think).  The fire started in the basement of the bakery.  It was really fortunate that no one was hurt. 

I picked my dh up from work so he could help me get my stuff out.  What a mess!  And the smell, the smell of smoke after a house fire or a bulding fire is really an unforgettable smell.  Most of my products are ruined from smoke damage.  No one wants to buy smoke scented soaps, but the odd thing is, I have a fragrance for my soap called "woodsmoke"!  My sister and I were looking at it the other day, and figuring out what we could mix it with, as it smells pretty odd for a soap! 

When I got home, all we could smell was smoke, and that was on me!  The building was still hot from the fire, and it was pretty smokey considering all the fans they had going.  My clothes just reek!  The store on the other side of the bakery houses a chocolate shop!!  They have to throw out all their chocolate, and get the smoke out or the building and have all the Easter goodies ready for Easter in a couple of weeks!  What a job!

I figure I have lost over $300.00, but I am more thankful that my friend wasn't hurt, or anyone else.