One in 150… those are the statistics for autism. It seems like everyone at least knows someone with an autistic child, & maybe even more than one. I’m on a few Yahoogroups for parents with autistic children; some of the groups are for Christians.  The subject of church comes up quite often. Many families don’t go, others have left churches because they were not welcome or their situation was too difficult for the churches to handle, or they’ve actually been asked to leave because the church did not understand autism or the child’s behavior & didn’t want to take the time to work with the family.
 
These are Christian churches …  which adds to it being so disturbing.

Many times it’s just impossible to handle taking an autistic child to church, never mind more than one, & never mind having more than one child needing attention. The sensory issues such as the loudness of the music or even the pastor’s voice, the people singing, the lights, fans humming, etc, can all be very overwhelming for the child. This can result in a terrible meltdown, the result of which very often leaves many looking down upon the child & judging the parents for not being able to “control” him/her.  I was told by a father at one church that he didn’t believe ADD exists, but that it was just a disciplinary problem. Parents of the higher functioning kiddos meet that kind of uneducated judgment by self proclaimed experts (without special needs children) all the time.

The child is often not able to stay quiet due to the sensory overload, so in an effort to cope they may make odd noises or gestures or stim in some way. This becomes disruptive to some people. I was at one church where a small child with autism would sometimes have a bad day & make some sniffing noises during the service. I didn’t find her disruptive at all (considering how loud my kiddos get), but I don’t think that’s just because I’m used to odd noises. It was a low sort of noise, nothing an adult person with a cold or allergy wouldn’t be doing but she just did it more consistently. Apparently she was disturbing some of the people around her therefore they were asked to leave.

The typical “diet” of snacks & treats before, during, or after services is not a welcome sight for those suffering from food allergies, or autistic children on special diets, many of whom do not know better than to grab something they cannot have, often resulting in terrible behavior & physical illness. My daughter was once handed a cookie on a napkin by a well meaning person after a service. I was right next to her, but was not asked if it was something she could have. She is highly allergic to nuts & intolerant to dairy, so I had to thank her nicely but give back the cookie. Thankfully my daughter was very understanding & I had brought an alternate treat for her. If this had been my Big or Little Guys the story may not have ended so well.

“Children’s Church” is not much help. They typically have several children. Most churches are not able to accommodate a child who needs a “shadow” as they need a person familiar & comfortable with the child’s challenges who can help him/her through the class, & perhaps help them to participate on some level. Many parents have been told their children are not welcome to return because of difficult behaviors that are not “bratty”, but simply a part of autism that they do not understand.

Unfortunately, this & worse happens all the time - in "Christian" churches.

The book, Special Needs-Special Ministry is a blessing, if it can get into the churches, & if they are interested… (I fear the latter will be a problem).

I’ve visited churches, called several others, & been told time & again that they do not have the facilities, do not have the money, do not have the resources, maybe someday…etc.

Someday is now for those of us with autistic children. We’re part of His family as well, & so are our children, & our segment of Christian society is being neglected & forgotten.

Special Needs, Special Ministry
Contributing authors, Jim Pierson, Louise Tucker Jones, Pat Verbal

From the back of the book:

REACH EACH ONE!

Jesus told us to reach out to everyone – and that includes children with special needs and their families. But where do you start? How can your church become a welcome place for families whose children have special needs? How can you reach this under-served – and sometimes unwanted – group of God’s children?

Special Needs – Special Ministry is a practical, real-world guide to help you! In a warm and friendly way, this complete step-by-step guide helps you think through this strategy, scope and purpose of your special needs ministry. You’ll be prepared to build, launch, expand, or deepen your special needs ministry – with impact!

-Learn from the successes and failures of churches with special needs programs.
-Build awareness about special needs ministry in your church.
-Launch or further develop a special needs ministry.
-Partner with local agencies.
-Gain insight from Pat Verbal, Louise Tucker Jones, and more!
-Think through the staffing, space, budget, and leadership implications of hosting a special needs ministry.

And a bonus: You get three complete sermon outlines from Dr. Jim Pierson, plus 10 reproducible bulletin inserts to hand out in your church services!

This book is not geared toward autism & church exclusively; it addresses special needs children and church, with autism mentioned as well. I read it a while ago, however, I devoured it as it seemed to really capture the challenges we face, the exhaustion, the inability to find the time or energy to educate the world while putting that much needed energy we do have into helping our children, the not wanting to even try anymore, & the rejection that often comes when we do.

And instead of understanding, we often must face harsh judgments about not attending from church going Christians who have no conception of what everyday life is like with autism, & don’t take the time to understand the difficulty involved in going anywhere, never mind church.

Many families with autistic children needing to be reached are Christians put off of church from bad experiences, & others are not Christians who will never be reached because there are no ministries for autistic families.

God bless the missionaries… the world needs them. He said to go out & make disciples of all nations, & they heed that command.

But, where are the autism missionaries?