Posted in Homeschooling--the Best Choice We Ever Made

As we approach the the middle of the school year, parents are again questioning what to do about their children's education in the coming year. Growing dissatisfaction with the public school system, coupled with a burning desire to see their children succeed academically, parents are faced with three possible choices. They can keep sending their children to the public school, in the hopes that things will get better, or perhaps send them to a private school. A growing choice, though, has become the decision to school at home.

The decision to home school is a big decision. Many questions come into play as parents think through the possibility. Do we have the time, the money, the knowledge, the ability, the patience? Perhaps a better question is, "Do we have a choice?"

Many scriptures command parents to educate their child. First and foremost to most home educators is the Deuteronomy passage that tells parents to diligently instruct their children in all of God's ways, all day every day, and wherever they may be. In the scriptures, all education was done at home, primarily by the father. God's Word clearly indicates that we as parents are to be in control of our own children's education.

Some of my readers have homeschooled "forever." Others have just a year or two under their belts, while others are still in the deciding stage. Based on my own experience, and that of many other homeschoolers I know, there are several stages parents and students alike go through after taking the initial plunge and deciding to home school. This is especially true for those whose children have previously been in the public school system.

The first stage is the "OH! What have I gotten myself into?" stage. Once the decision has been made, and announced to family, friends, and school administrators, parents normally get quite a wave of negative from one if not all of these groups. This naturally will make one wonder if they did, indeed, make the correct decision. At this stage it is important to go to your best friend and advocate in this new endeavor, our Lord Himself. He is the source of all wisdom and strength. Veteran homeschoolers will be glad to help you through this phase, for they have been through it themselves.

Then there is "the first year." This stage can be quite trying. It is like any other new experience. You are feeling your way around, trying to see what works for you. It is easy to become frustrated and feel like giving up if your original plans for time management, instructional methods, or type of curriculum don't work out. Remember that this is a blessing in disguise. You have the flexibility as a home educator to try many different possibilities in each of these areas, until you find just the right combination for you and your child. It's called personalized instruction, and there is nothing better for your child. Sometimes it just takes a while to get there, so don't be discouraged. Again, go to the Lord and experienced home schoolers for advice and counsel.

Another phase that first year homeschoolers go through is the "withdrawal stage." Children who have been in the public school setting prior to home schooling nearly always go through this phase to one degree or another. It can express itself in many ways, from refusal to cooperate with mom as teacher, to discipline problems, to temporarily becoming very withdrawn and moody.

Most of this withdrawal problem is a sure sign that you are doing the very best thing for your child, as its primary cause is lack of peer dependency, which your child has learned to rely on.  The book of Proverbs says that he who keeps company with fools becomes a fool himself. Young children are foolish, certainly not yet wise. A roomful of children all the same age together all day everyday is literally a roomful of fools. Being peer dependent does not make a child wise, and you should thank God that you have intercepted this peer dependency in the bud. Once your child realizes that this decision to homeschool is real, and understands the parents feel God has instructed them in this decision, he will gradually realize he must cooperate in the endeavor. This whole process is a good set of lessons in character development and obedience to authority. In fact, if even these two "subject areas" are covered thoroughly the first year, you can consider yourself a success.

The next stage you are likely to encounter is the "But my test scores aren't what I expected." This is very common the first year. After all, your child has switched from one school to another, from one teaching philosophy to an entirely different one, from one curricula to another, and also is dealing with withdrawal. This is NOT a problem. Next year will be better, believe me.

These various first year stages naturally lead to the "Should I try this another year, or send my child back to school?" stage. I encourage you to really rely on the Lord and your homeschool friends at this time. You are about to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and all your hard work of the previous year is just about to blossom. Don't give up now, or you will never know what a success your homeschool experience could have been.

Other stages follow through the years, but these are the basics for newcomers. Whenever you are having doubts about homeschooling, problems with friends and neighbors, or just are in a mood where you feel like throwing your hands up in despair, I again encourage you to rely on the Lord for his strength and guidance as your best Friend of all, and to never hesitate to call upon a veteran homeschooler who will be happy to encourage you and lift you up in prayer.