Writing from My Heart

8/30/2009

Exert from My Prayer Journal (part 2)

August 30, 2009, 9:53 PM
Daddy.
Daddy, please. I give up. I’ve been trying to do things my own way and it isn’t working. I’m tired and unmotivated. I’ve lost sight of where you’re telling me to go. You’ve been setting this up for a long while now. I see that now. Daddy, I’m coming back to you. I need your help. These songs we’ve been singing, Hosanna, We Cry Out…
Daddy, I’m crying out now. I’m crying out to you. Tell me where to go and what to do. Everything’s coming to a point where I can end my school, I can end my rent, I can end my job, if that’s where you want me, but I don’t know if that’s where you want me.

Father of life, seated on your throne of grace
It’s only by your mercy we are saved
Lord you have said, if we call upon your name,
We and our families will be saved

So we cry, out your name
El Shaddai, God of grace
Lord, most high, Jesus Christ
We rely on your grace
Adonai, crowned in praise
Lord, most high, Jesus Christ

Father of love never failing to forgive
Each moment is a gift from you to me
We’re only here to tell the world about your grace
Until the day when you take us all away

We will cry, out your name
El Shaddai, God of grace
Lord, most high, Jesus Christ
We rely on your grace
Adonai, crowned in praise
Lord, most high, Jesus Christ

So we cry, out your name
El Shaddai, God of grace
Lord, most high, Jesus Christ
We rely on your grace
Adonai, crowned in praise
Lord, most high, Jesus Christ


Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
Everyone's here
Everyone's here
Everybody's watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next
What happens next

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here
Tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened before

All of this in conjunction with what Jeff said and mom’s…change of heart, I may not have a definite answer now, but I feel like I’m closer to one. Thank you so much Daddy. I’ll get better.
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What happens when a writer quits writing? Well, if they write for money, then they find another source of income, but if they write for a purpose other than the obvious then something happens that can't be explained. Writing is how God speaks to me and through me. Life, love, and why. Family, friends, and school.

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