Originally written 2/3/09; updated and expanded 2/18/09; expanded 6/6/09.
Creative ... nearly always has a project going on
Likes to read (like me!)
Loves the Lord
Same values as me (biblical)
Very smart ... I usually feel a lot more confident when I solicit her thoughts
Enjoys being intimate with me and often initiates
Athletic ... likes to downhill ski, cross-country ski, ice-skate, hike, canoe, ride horses, and sometimes gets on a jogging kick
Looks great (to say the least!)
Invests in exercise and eating right to keep looking great (I like to think this is for my benefit!)
Not too materialistic ... for example, although every other woman we know has a cell phone, she gave up her cell phone for five years as I started my business and we paid off our home mortgage
Not overly concerned with looking perfect ... for example, doesn't get uptight if her hair gets messed up or if she isn't wearing the latest fashions
Likes me and enjoys doing things with me
Similar sense of humor as me
Willing to stay at home and raise our kids
Excels at homeschooling our kids
Fantastic cook ... and keeps expanding her repertoire
Raising my daughters to be capable, happy, strong women
More sympathetic than I am when our kids have problems
Well-read and knowledgeable on a variety of topics
Prevailing attitude is cheerful, optimistic, and strong
Willing to make sacrifices for the sake of other people and the gospel
Lets me snuggle up to her at night ... and always has warm feet (and did I mention that her feet are cute?)
Still fun to kiss after all these years
Cheerful eyes
Wears her hair long, like I like it
Willing to humor my superficial requests like wearing perfume for special occasions
A great mother ... loving, but not a pushover
Frugal ... willing to buy second-hand clothes, drive extra miles to grocery shop at Walmart, etc.
Health conscious ... buys quality, wholesome food and even raises her own
Wife of my youth ... what a history we have together!
Not given to fads, whether worldly or "Christian"
Doesn't do things that I see or hear about other wives doing that seem negative to me, like:
Bringing up various men to compare me with
Vying to be our kids' favorite parent
Bringing up old grievances or calling to mind my past blunders
Watching too much TV (even better, she watches none)
Reading trashy books or magazines
Having crushes on celebrity men
Partying with girlfriends
Smoking, drinking, doing drugs, gambling, or any other addiction
Maintaining close relationships with any men besides me
Lovely voice to listen to when she talks or sings
Tidy and organized, especially for a mother of four young children
Lately has been minimizing her time on the computer, and in particular reserving it for when the kids don't need her attention (I know this is difficult, b/c where we live the Internet is the primary way to get info and to shop wisely, but I think it makes a world of difference in our home)
Willing to do things or change certain things when I ask her, even though she doesn't want to. For example, grocery shopping was a huge weekly ordeal that was getting in the way of my work productivity because I need to mind some of the kids while she is gone for most of the day. She switched to twice-weekly, and even shifted the time of day so less of the workday is affected. It takes humility to respond to such a request, not to mention consideration and self-sacrifice.
Forgives and forgets. Next to God, she is the one who most knows about the times I've sinned (in other words, been a big jerk). Like God, she forgives me, still loves me, and still has high hopes for me. It's amazing to me that she doesn't keep bringing up some major screw-ups I've done in the past.
I am by nature a saver, where she is more of a free spirit when it comes to money. While this sometimes causes friction, she never treats me like a tightwad. We discuss things and generally come to a mutual decision. I say "generally" because sometimes the thriftier person (which could be Erin if we're talking about something I want to spend money on) simply has veto power due to the reality that we only have so much money, and so although we both accept the decision it's not exactly mutually decided. Anyway, it would be easy for Erin to manipulate or play a martyr often by rolling her eyes and saying, "You're just a cheapskate" or "Don't bother asking Daddy, b/c he hates spending money." By treating me with respect, she gives me the freedom to carefully think about what's best for the family (which often involves spending more money than feels right, but hey -- I'm a tightwad).
I mentioned above that Erin is a great cook, but it deserves special mention that she often makes up a new dish or dessert. To me, that makes eating at home continually feel special and as exciting as going to a restaurant.
It really feels nice when she does something just for me, like paint her toenails or wear her hair a certain way or buy something that she knows I like. Those thoughtful moments bring a feeling akin to when we were dating -- what a thrill that someone so awesome cares about me!
If we both have errands around town or in another town, she tries to arrange schedules so we can ride together, even if driving separately would be more efficient. How cool is it that she likes to spend time with me?
Journal of a father very interested in seeing his four children walk in truth. While my wonderful wife is our school's main teacher and curriculum planner, my role is critical as well ... so I'm always interested in learning and sharing with other homeschool parents. I own a small consulting firm (see www.blackwater-consulting.com) that I love because the work is interesting and I get to work from home.
