Mar. 10, 2007 - Mom Time

A year ago I started a monthly Mom Time group.  This month's was this past Friday night.  I'm exhausted!  I'm barely functioning!  I absolutely love this time! It is worth every bit of the sacrifice in sleep.

Once a month, on a Friday evening, I host a Mom Time.  I serve coffee, tea and dessert (usually chocolate!).  I currently have about 30 on my invitation list, however, it is an 'open' invitation - not an exclusive group.  So all are free to bring friends or spread the word. The only exclusive part is that the group is for mom's with at least one child aged birth to preK. Attendance has ranged from 8 to 17 and has always been a fun and interesting mix of people.

We have a pre-determined topic (organization, budgeting, parenting, nutrition, etc). I always invite a mentor mom to be present for 2 reasons: (1) to offer advice or tips and (2) to help make sure our conversation stay God-honoring.  It's a relaxed group discussion. No side conversations are allowed. This is a chance for mom's of young children to get together and share frustrations and challenges and to hopefully walk away encouraged.

There is no ending time to our evening. Moms just leave when they need or want to.  They start to trickle out around 9:30 PM. But always 1 or 2 stay until 1 or 2 AM!.  As the group size dwindles, the ladies become increasingly open and talkative.   Every month the last hour or 2 has been myself and only 1 or 2 other ladies that have stayed into the night.  That intimate time is the hightlight for me.  The best conversations take place besides the fact that we are getting a little giddy from lack of sleep! And always it's been a different person staying late into the night. 

This past Friday, 2 ladies stayed until 2:45 AM!  It was fantastic!  One of the ladies I didn't know at all (I do now!) and the other I didn't know very well.

The price to pay began at 6:30 AM when a 4 yr old ray of sunshine came bursting into my room!  I am soooooo tired!

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Jan. 23, 2007 - Letting Out The Safety Line

My oldest, 6 yr old Chloe, has been causing us some frustration lately.  But as hubby and I took the time to think and talk it out, we hit upon the source.    We are the source!  We've been treating her like a 3 yr old and so.....she's been acting like a 3 yr old!

Over the past few years Chloe has continued to have birthdays but we have not continued to add to her responsibilities and freedoms.  We have not expected any more out of her than when she was 3.   It doesn't help that she has 3 yr old twin siblings so the majority of the "house rules" are geared to them. 

Anyway, we wrote out a short list for Chloe of the new responsibilities as well as freedoms that are unique for her because she is older.  Wow!  What a difference!  She was so excited.  Suddenly, she is acting more grown up (well, like how a 6r old should act).

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Jan. 5, 2007 - I Am So Glad My Neighbor Moved!

 It sounds so horrible to hear myself say that!  I have always considered neighbors to be part of my "mission field" - my responsibility to show Christ.

Last year I did a monthly Bible Club for the neighboring kids.  I had an average of 8 kids come each month.  One boy even chose to believe in Christ as his Saviour!    Another girl, "K", came every single month. I also took her to AWANA every week.  But she still has not yet chosen Christ as her personal Saviour .  She would often come over to play with my kids.  She was new to the neighborhood and had no friends at school yet.  Her 2 siblings are 10 + years older than her. And she is home alone much of the time - don't know what her parents are up to. 

The first year she came to play was fine. She was in 3rd grade then.  I supervised the play because my oldest was only 4 yrs old at the time and because "K" is not a Christian.  Even though the age difference they had a lot of fun.

But then last year I started getting a little stressed when "K" came over to play.  She was then in 4th grade and beginning to say things I didn't want my children hearing.  Things like swear words or even things about alcohol, guns, fighting, teenage pregnancy,etc.  She didn't say much but these were the topics that had come up from time to time.    This is one reason why I homeschool!  Jim and I are the ones to tell her of these things in the time and in the way we deem appropriate!  My 6 yr old is still appropriately naive and believes what she's told, even by "K".

This past summer was so trying!!  I had an infant in the house and found it nearly impossible to supervise the girls' play.  I would dread it when the doorbell would ring.  As often as I could I would think of an excuse why the kids couldn't play.  It was terrible!  I was feeling overpowered by a now 5th grader!

In the last few months there has been trouble at "K's" house.  The police have been there several times. I don't know why.   Then, over Christmas weekend they spent all night moving out.  My husband and I are so happy!  At the same time, I feel bad because I know we may be the only light of Christ she will see.  But ladies, my own kids are more important.  My protection over them was being jeopardized.  I am glad she's gone!

Lest you think I am over-sheltering, let me inform you that currently in my house is another neighbor girl playing.  She is not a Christian either but I know her family well and have never heard anything compromising come out of any of their mouths.  Surely, this is not grounds to have complete trust in someone so I still keep a listening ear in on their play, nonetheless.  But I'm not stressed and I enjoy hearing them have so much fun!  By the way, it's this girl's younger brother that accepted the Lord as his Saviour at one of my Kid's Bible Clubs last year!!!

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Dec. 4, 2006 - Willow is Going to Heaven

My almost 4 yr old daughter, Willow, asked Jesus in her heart last Thursday morning during breakfast.   The other kids had crawled in bed with daddy so it was just Willow and me eating breakfast.  I was able to seize the moment when Willow again asked about heaven. Previously, she had not understood a key point.  But this time was different.  She understood and asked me to help her make sure we was going to go to heaven someday. 

There are 2 things in particular that I want to share with you about this experience.  First is this.....my husband mentioned that I never would have had that quiet, uninterrupted few minutes with Willow had he not been home.  He was home from work because we had a funeral to go to a little later that morning.  The funeral was for a very close friend who died of a heart attack at age 49.  My husband and I both agree that if while our friend was alive and we asked him if he would be willing to die today in order to give Willow the opportunity to invite Jesus into her heart....well, no doubt about it, he would have said yes.  He was that kind of person.  We'll miss him greatly.   He had sacrificed on our behalf more times than I can count.

Secondly....I am grateful that I listened to the holy spirit's prompting to stop what I was doing and to give Willow my full attention on the topic even if it didn't end with her taking Jesus as her Saviour as had happened a couple times before.  There are many times that I am answering my children's spiritual questions during the rush of going here and there.  In fact, here's a previous experience I had while not being alert.....

When my daughter Chloe was 4 yrs old (she's now 6) she mentioned to her daddy that she had asked Jesus in her heart the day before.  He was stunned!  When he questioned her she said she did it while in the car with mommy.  Now I was stunned!  I didn't remember anything happening in the car the day before!  Here's what did happen....  While riding in the car, she asked me all sorts of questions about what would someone need to pray to make sure they were going to heaven.  I answered her questions while being more focused on my driving.  Understand, Chloe is a girl of nonstop questions.   She's a learner.  She will ask all the same questions over and over just to make sure she has all the details correct in her head.  So I often find that with her especially, I am answering her questions (again) without really paying much attention to her. 

And in the car that day, I was not alert to the fact that at the moment I was answering her questions that she was actually applying my answers and praying - asking Jesus into her hear!    I missed being able to be a part of the most wonderful moment my daughter would ever experience in this life!  Praise the Lord her salvation is not dependent on me being alert!!!!  And praise the Lord my lack of alertness did not hinder her in that moment!!!! I also thank God that Chloe perceived me to be truly engaged with her in that moment of decision.   And praise the Lord I was alert to Willow!   It was a few minutes in time I will never forget and am so honored to be a part of!

Here's a picture of Willow washing dishes later that day.  She loves to play in water more than a fish does!

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Nov. 13, 2006 - Raising Children / Building Cathedrals

From Family Life, Dennis & Barbara Rainey

Laying Bricks or Building Cathedrals?

Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth.
How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them.

Psalm 127:4,5

Parents today need God's perspective of children. I think many of us can relate to the story of a man who went door to door asking for donations for a new children's home. At one house he met a tired, beleaguered mother who responded, "I'll tell you what I'll do. I will give you two children."

That is how many people feel about children some days. On one hand we say, "We sure love kids." And then we turn around and complain, "They sure cost a lot, and man, you have to deny yourself to raise kids." It's as if we don't really believe ththat we are "blessed" when our quivers are full of children.

Children are divinely placed gifts, not accidents. They are a privilege. Barbara and I may sometimes feel that kids get in the way of life, but in reality they are part of the life that God is bringing to us everyday. They are on loan with a divine purpose.

A man saw three men working with mortar and bricks. He went to the first man and said, "What are you doing?" The man replied, "I am laying bricks." He went to the second man and asked him the same question and the worker said, "I am building a wall." But the final bricklayer had a different answer: "I am building a cathedral."

In the process of raising kids, it is very easy to feel like you are just laying bricks. In reality you are building a cathedral, a child whom God has given you to train up to carry on in the next generation. There is no greater privilege in life.

Discuss: Why is it easy to forget that, as we raise children, we are "building cathedrals" and not just "laying bricks?"

Pray: That you would develop a vision for what God wants to accomplish through you as you build into your children.

From: FamilyLife [mailto:enews@familylife.com]
Excerpted from "Moments Together for Couples" by Dennis and Barbara Rainey.
Used with permission. Copyright 1995 by Dennis and Barbara Rainey. All rights reserved.  To purchase the book, visit  ->
http://www.familylife.com/1-800-358-6329/detail.asp?id=1170

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