We were listening to a message on the internet and I took some notes. I combined these notes with another message I heard on forgiveness YEARS ago and I want to get rid of the notebook so I thought I would transfer the points onto my blog.
Five Qualities of a bitter person
* They justify their bitterness. They feel that they have a right to feel hurt and bitter. The things they think sound like, "I am entitled to feeling this way, look at what they did to me!"
* They become overly critical. They feel that they can never see anything good in the person who hurt them ever again. They find fault in not only the person who hurt them but in others too.
* They secretly celebrate the misfortunes of others. They even quote scripture to justify themselves like "you reap what you sow" and they say "what goes around comes around".
* They write off entire groups of people because of hurt.
They say things like:
"I hate men!"
"I hate women!"
"I hate church!"
"I hate pastors!"
"How can they call themselves Christians!?"
* They struggle to see bitterness in the mirror.
They say, "I wish so and so could hear this message on bitterness!" 
People who are bitter BLAME God, themselves and others.
QUESTION
How do you kill the root of Bitterness?
ANSWER
With forgiveness!
Ephesians 4
29Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.
30Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.
31Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.
32Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
So verse 31 says we have to get rid of ALL that yucky stuff and forgive each other.
You can go into seclusion and still have a bitter root grow. Carrying around something that God wanted you to get rid of is detrimental to yourself in so many ways.
Forgiveness is not the same as pretending it never happened.
It is important to acknowledge that there IS significant and deep hurt.
If you are saying, "I don't want to forgive, how can I even get there?" The answer is that it is a choice and can be a process.
It was suggested that we make a list of the people who have hurt us and how they have hurt us and start systematically working through the list.
Not forgiving allows the abuse to continue and the pain to ourselves to carry on.
Obviously none of this comes naturally to us which is why it is commanded. It requires EFFORT on our part....
Matthew 6
14For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
15But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.
The more we forgive the easier it becomes. If we hold onto the grudge we suffer.
We are to stop talking about how much we have been hurt. Stop thinking about it. Stop looking back. DROP IT!
John 20:
21So Jesus said to them again, "Peace be with you; as the Father has sent Me, I also send you."
22And when He had said this, He breathed on them and said to them, "Receive the Holy Spirit.
23"If you forgive the sins of any, their sins have been forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they have been retained."
|
• Jun. 28, 2008 - Untitled Comment
JoAnn