Yesterday I decided that we could all use a break from daily life.  So i announced that it was a day off.  Truly a mental health day for myself.  I let them watch an hour of television in the middle of the day.  That was a HUGE treat.  They were able to play games on the computer and do whatever they wished.  My other motive was a desire to see how they would spend free time on a last minute whim.  All in all it was a good day.  I became slightly snarky when my oldest two tried to find find an ulterior motive in my 'family fun day'  (i have an obsession with marking things with names.) I do regret my burst of anger because I was trying to see if I could be more fun and lighthearted as well.  Oh well.  I cannot make it through one day without losing my patience.  It's not the most enlightening revelation.  I did have doubts that I could do it.  I do think that the very act of mothering is foreshadowing to some sort of breakdown.  The very presence of children is a recipe for irratation at some point.  The foolishness of children can wear upon even a saint's nerves. 

What bothers me the most during the course of any given day is the bickering between my brood.  Oh it wears upon my nerves.  When i'm at my weakest and my nerves are bandaged up and recoverying from a previous assult it BUGs me.  When I'm rocking the mother deal and my nerves are rested and at peace it BUGs me. 

It is the area in my parenting that has been the most inconsistent.  Sometimes they are sent to a neutral corner and sometimes they duke it out.  I have manipulated peaceful co-existence with shameless bribery and I have refused to get involved in any way. 

Still, as I type my boys are fighting over room territory at the same time the older two are fighting over who is the faster worker.  My stragedy for today?  My ipod and it's trusty ear buds.  Michael Buble and volume control.