Joy Bird

Nov. 6, 2009 - Moving

I'm no longer going to be posting on here because Emily and Daniel had this great idea that we have a group blog and call it RED (Rachel, Emily and Daniel). We think that it will work out better and we will post more often than on our individual blogs. I also figured out how to host it directly on our website, so we're leaving homeschoolblogger for good. Here it is: http://lambsundries.com/red

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Oct. 8, 2009 - Since all I have time for is school nowadays...

I've decided I'll just start posting my school reports. Not to scare all my readers away--I'm going to post the really interesting ones. This week I was going to research about James Fennimore Cooper, (I've only read a few of his books) but I got caught up with The Pathfinder, and made some very interesting discoveries. I'm only posting part of this one. I saved the best for last, so keep reading. :)

Natty Bumppo—The Pathfinder

* * *

(Note the *'s are a signal to do three solemn taps on the table. So says Daniel)

As I was researching for this paper, I made a discovery—The Pathfinder actually has a name and what's more, he appears in several books other than the Pathfinder, including The Last of The Mohicans. His name is Natty Bumppo, and is believed to be in part based on a real man named David Shipman. The Pathfinder goes by many nicknames in a group of five books called The Leatherstocking Tales. He is called "Deerslayer" in The Deerslayer, "Hawkeye" and "La Longue Carabine" in The Last of the Mohicans, "Leatherstocking" in The Pioneers, "The Trapper" in The Prairie and, of course, "The Pathfinder." Out of all his nicknames, I still like Pathfinder the best. I don't even know if he was ever called by his 'real' name in any of the books, but I'll have to read them to find out.

The character is very interesting to me, and I'm looking forward to reading the rest of The Leatherstocking Tales. I'm hoping The Pathfinder won't change too much in between books; James Fennimore Cooper has a habit of forgetting things and changing them in the middle of books. For example, Mabel Dunham, who used to be named Agnes. In that case, I'm very glad her name changed because Agnes is just too ugly. In The Pathfinder alone, the main character, Natty Bumppo, frequently changed his age, starting out at about 50 at the beginning of the book, and ending up about twenty years younger by the end. There is a good thing about that though, because it lets the reader decide for himself how old he wants The Pathfinder to be!

Fenimore Cooper's Literary Offenses by Mark Twain

When I saw this I nearly died with laughter.

(Note: "JoyBird? Really? Die?" You may say. "I really think you're exaggerating a little tiny bit." No! Not a bit!)

'Finally!' I thought, 'Someone who agrees with us in our criticisms of Cooper's hilarious little blunders in his writing!' I will now proceed to relate to the reader a small summary of this essay, but will save most of it until next week—after I have read the whole paper.

Mark Twain starts out by listing the "nineteen rules governing literary art in domain of romantic fiction," and proving that Cooper violated at least eighteen of them in his book, Deerslayer. He talks about all kinds of stereotypical things that James Fennimore Cooper does, like referring to all women as 'females.' For example: "He approached the stage containing the females." It's really ridiculous sounding, isn't it? Twain also talks about the different ways in which Cooper miraculously defies nature, and how the characters are always stepping on dry twigs. I haven't found out if he's noticed the constant 'blushing and paling' yet, but more about that next week.

As Mark Twain goes through and picks out all the little errors in Cooper's writing, his favorite thing to make fun of is Cooper's use of the word 'situation'. I might add 'novel situation.' I wonder, if we were to count, exactly how many times we would find the words 'novel situation' in all of Cooper's books. He ends by saying (of Deerslayer) ; "...it's humor is pathetic; it's pathos are funny; it's conversations are – oh! indescribable....its English a crime against the language. Counting these out, what is left is Art. I think we must all admit that." Stay tuned for the thrilling accounts of the novel situations Deerslayer- Hawkeye- LongRifle- Leatherstocking- Pathfinder-Bumppo often finds himself in.

Hopefully I will get around to posting the next thrilling episode about Fenimore Cooper's Literary Offenses by Mark Twain when it's finished. Until then, I hope my wonderful readers will comment! (hint, hint) And if flattery doesn't work, I will have to resort to other methods like the one-legged space chickens...or worse yet the sock drawer monsters!

-Joy Bird

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Sep. 5, 2009 - We finally finished our room (So now we have pictures.)

So we finally decided on paint colors, scraped the ceiling, put in flooring, and finished decorating our room. Finally. So for those who haven't actually seen it in person, I've decided to post pictures!

First the before:

Ugly, isn't it? The house was built in 1970 and was never updated.

Now, since it looked so boring before and I'm running out of picture space, The After Photos!

We did two shades of blue on the walls.

Our shells from when we lived on our boat, and the Philippines boxes. Aren't they beautiful?

The picture on the left is made up of blue morphos butterfly wings; my great grandfather bought it in Panama in the early 1920's when he first went to Brazil as a missionary. Most of the other things came from either the Philippines, or the Caribbean.

Look at that! All my favorite books in one place. And they match, too.

I particularly like that light green one there in the middle. :)

...and I've run out of space. Hope you enjoyed the pictures.

Rebekah- Have you ever seen a soft ball sized spiky clam? My Grandma gave one to me that had been sitting in her basement for the last 10 years, and told me it had come from the Philippines. According to National Geographic Magazine they're kind of rare now. Hmmm....

That's all! No more! Wala na. :)

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Aug. 27, 2009 - Funny things I used to write when I was younger.

The other day when Emily and I were moving our stuff to our new room, (more about that later) and going through ancient boxes that hadn't been opened in years, we came across a very interesting little book full of Celestial Seasonings coloring pages. On the front it said:

Short Stories

(& poems)

Fun & Adventure

Color & Read

by:

Emily, Daniel & Rachel

I had some recollection of this, so we opened it up and inside we found a hilarious story about a lion written by 8 year old me. So here it is:

*Ahem*

Journal of a Sentimental Lion Abroad

August 10

As I, Leo, King of the Jungle, sit here drinking my Vanilla Red tea, I think that if only my lioness were here, I could share the beauty of the zebras drinking, the gazelles grazing, and the giraffes, who have extremely long necks. If only my lioness were here.

Ho hum.

Dear Leona,

I cannot ezpress to you how satisfying it has been to have been able to get out of a den filled from front to back with cubs. It is very pleasant here. I have but one comlaint, that is, I need your company.

But of course, I am kept busy when on a safari. But still, safaris need to be shared. As I have said, it is very agreeable here. Your Vanilla Red tea adds so much to that agreeableness. I will be back on September 25 and I will be happy to see you. Perhaps some time, when the cubs are grown, you can come with me on a trip such as this.

All My love,

King Leo

I am weary because of my exertions in fast swimming. I fear I am not a good swimmer.

"But what is strength without a double share of wisdom." -John Milton

__________________________________________________________

Then there was the poem about the sock drawer monster, written at about the same time....but maybe I'll post that later. ;)

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Jun. 14, 2009 - Update and Comic relief :)

Sorry to those of you who actually read my blog! Life has been hectic lately. My grandpa has cancer, and as of today it looks like he won't survive past this week. Please pray for him and for our family especially.

So...what have I been doing this summer so far? First of all Daniel, Emily, my mom and I have volunteered at Rock Ledge Ranch for this summer. We get to dress up in period clothing, give tours of the historic buildings there at the Ranch, do demonstrations, and Emily and Daniel get to play in the mud. (Emily works in the garden and Daniel works at the cabin) I'm a little disappointed that I don't get to play in the mud too, but oh well. :)

At the gift shop at Rock Ledge Ranch I found this really neat little whistle for only $2! It's wooden, and is played just like an Irish Whistle. It's slightly out of tune, but is fine as long as I'm not playing with anyone else.

That's what's been going on here. Oh and, by the way, IF YOUR LAST NAME IS ORFIELD YOU HAVE TO COMMENT. Just thought I should add that. And for comic relief:

I can't decide which one to post, so I'll post both.

Tim Hawkin's 'Subway' and 'Imagine'

-Joy Bird

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Jun. 9, 2009 - Vintage Wedding Refashioned Frock GIVEAWAY!!!!

Vintage Wedding Refashioned Frock Giveaway

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Feb. 23, 2009 - The Sober Science of Migrating Rubber Duckies

"In January 1992, a freighter crossing the Pacific from Hong Kong to Tacoma, Wash., ran into rough weather near the International Date Line As the ship heaved through the storm-tossed seas, several cargo containers on deck--including one filled with tens of thousands of plastic tub toys--came loose, fell overboard, and broke apart. Seven months after the spill, the plastic ducks, beavers, turtles, and frogs began washing up on beaches. Scientists who track ocean currents were ecstatic. Even today, additional members of the tub-toy armada occasionally make landfall."

-Source: findarticles.com

A few months ago I came across an article in the Wall Street Journal about 'flotsam science'. Dr. Behar and his colleagues at the University of Colorado this past August set 90 yellow rubber ducks set afloat into the melt water flowing down a chasm in the largest of Greenland's glaciers. Each duck had an email address and an offer of a reward in 3 different languages. The idea is that, if all goes well, one day the ducks will come out on the other side of the glacier, which is 30 miles away. This way they will be able to learn more about the currents, and what they have to do with global warming. (Not that I think the earth is getting warmer or there's anything we can do about it) They have been doing it in other places, too. Often the rubber ducks end up on the opposite side of the world from where the scientists were expecting them.

So, why rubber ducks? Well, they're cheap, brightly colored, and they are surprisingly durable. They endure cold and pressure under glaciers, and can float around and around the world for years. Then there's the question of 'What if they get eaten?' Hmmm....

Here is the link to the article: The Sober Science of Migrating Rubber Duckies

Well, that's all for today!

-Joy Bird

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Feb. 11, 2009 - The Cliffs of Insanity...and the adventures met with there.

Note: Before you read this, you must know that when we were younger, we often made a pastime out of making up characters, and then performing plays about them for our parents. A few characters survived without getting killed in any of our plays, (and some even came back from the dead!) and they are still very much alive.

Here is a typical story about them that we made up the other day. Keep in mind that all of these were always performed by particular people: Dane the Galapagos Turtle, the steady one, is Emily. Miss Clueless is Daniel. Yes, Daniel. Daniel does the best Miss Clueless act, hands down. You may (mis)construe that however you like. Janks and Sally Dill are Rachel. (She being prone to double personalities...)

Also, some characters are modeled after real people. So without further ado; The Cliffs of Insanity!

It all happened one day when Janks, Miss Clueless and Dane the Turtle decided to go to the famed 'Cliffs of Insanity'. When they had all piled into the tourist tram, Sally Dill, who happened to be their tour guide, called out

"Please keep all arms, legs and baggage OUT of the vehicle at ALL times!" *BEEP*
"Guarde por favor todos los brazos, piernas y bagaje fuera del vehículo siempre!" *BEEP*

Miss Clueless, being the clueless lady she is, immediately thrust both her feet out the window and as a result lost one of her beautiful designer high-heeled sandals.

"Oh!" she exclaimed. "Well, that wasn't very nice of her to tell me that!"

Janks groaned from under his hat which he had thrown over his face. If there was one thing he hated, it was clueless people.

"No one's ever called you a blond, have they?" he said, sarcastically.

Dane just munched his celery placidly. He didn't really like celery, but he ate it anyway. That was the way with Dane.

Pretty soon they came to the cliffs. Sally Dill hopped out and said, laughing,

"Welcome to the CLIFFS OF INSANITY!! WHOOOOOOO!!"

"Ugg." said Janks. He really didn't want to be there, Sally had talked him into it.

"That's it!" he yelled, "I'm just going to jump off this cliff!"

And so he did. They heard a splash. There was a solemn silence for a while as if nobody knew exactly what to say, then Sally Dill broke it by saying,

"That looks like FUN!"

She took a running leap, and followed Janks off the cliff.

"W-where are you going?" yelled Miss Clueless.

She hobbled along on her one ridiculous sandal to the edge of the cliff, and then stopped, evidently trying to decide what to do.

"JANKS?" she called, "S-sally?"

All of a sudden she lost what footing she had and tumbled screaming off the cliff. As he looked calmly over the edge, Dane heard her scream,

"MYYYYY SSSHOOOOOOOE!!"

Dane turned and started plodding down the stairs--the stairs which no one had noticed. He sighed. His friends were just too much. What were they thinking? But it was no use trying to figure that out. Dane had thought it over many times, and had concluded that it was impossible.
Janks was just dark. Dane was sure he had killed someone sometime in his life. Miss Clueless, well, there wasn't anything in her head to know, anyway. And Sally Dill? Well, Dane didn't know if even Sally knew what Sally was thinking, she was that unpredictable. He decided it was because she thought too fast. Sally could probably be a rocket scientist, he thought, if she would just slow down.
By the time Dane was done thinking all this he had gotten to the bottom of the stairs and was on his way to a little tourist beach.

Not long after, Janks, Sally Dill and Miss Clueless dragged themselves wearily onto the beach.
Dane was waiting for them.

"Slow and steady wins the race, eh Dane?" said Janks grumpily. "Humph."

He evidently hadn't succeeded in whatever his purpose was in jumping off that cliff, and to top it all off, that dangerous missile that Miss Clueless called a shoe had hit him squarely on the forehead, leaving a nice big lump. Janks carefully laid out his hat and coat to dry in the sun, then threw himself on the sand.

Miss Clueless was on the verge of tears. Not only was she soaking wet, but she had lost both her designer shoes, (which, by the way cost $300 EACH) and her over-sized crocodile skin purse was ruined. Not to mention her i pod and cellphone; but that didn't matter because she had never figured out how to use them anyway.
Sally alone remained unperturbed.

"That was the most fun I've had in my LIFE!" she yelled in Dane's ear. "I'm going again if anyone wants to come with me!"

Then, kissing Dane on the head, "Dane dear, be a good turtle and take care of the others for me. If I'm not back by dinnertime, I probably got in trouble with the shrieking eels, and you'd better send a search party!"

With that, she went skipping down the beach.

But none of this every bothered Dane in the least. He just sat there, looking benignly on, placidly munching his celery. Everything would 'All fall to pieces' as Sally says; it always did, and it always will.

THE END

I hope you enjoyed that!

~Joy Bird

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