I'm learning to be nicer to myself. To read my own physical signs and give myself a break when I'm getting tired. To recognize when I'm heading down the road to burn-out and take time out to rest. It's easy to get caught up in the rat-race and be so busy running that I don't eat properly, or get to bed on time, or nourish my spirit with the Bread of Life.

In the past I sat back and waited for others to notice that I was tired. Or, I'd slam pots and pans around in the kitchen while I was cleaning up, resenting that I was 'forced' to do 'all the work' while others were sitting back. I hope I'm getting better about admitting my limitations and asking for help rather than stewing in my self-made misery.

As the kids get older I think it's important to involve them in the household chores and daily upkeep. They need to learn those lifeskills, and as teenagers they need to realize the amount of work involved in many of their glib suggestions for entertainment.  And, it's fun to hang out together and listen to their silly banter and get to know what's going on inside their heads.

I think as Mom to three daughters I often send messages that I don't intend to teach them - that they have to punish themselves with overwork, that they must do all their work alone, that motherhood is so very very sacrificial, that being a woman means being a martyr. I confess that when the kids were younger that I often fell into the pattern of complaining and whining about the amount of work I was expected to do in a day. I didn't give myself breaks or curtail the standards I kept trying to achieve. (Perfection in housekeeping is an unattainable goal and not one worth pursuing!) Very strange behaviour considering I was my own boss, and was quite capable of making my life easier.  I'm not advocating slothful habits, but when I make my workload overwhelming I become a not-very-nice person to be around. Sometimes my work ethic can become a foothold for the enemy.