Do you have those moments? Those moments when everything is going wrong and you feel out of control or like everyone is out of control? Today it was during garden watering and weeding time. I was outside with the kids after breakfast to get the weeding/watering done. I started in with some kids getting the hose and the buckets. Unfortunately we're one hose too short to water the farther back garden so we need to fill 5-gallon buckets and bring them close to those areas and pour the water onto the plants.

So what do you think happens when you get a hose, buckets and 5 children ages 2, 4, 4, 6, and 8? I think you all know what a 2yo does with water and buckets. He scoops, dumps and pours back and forth between containers to his hearts content! What do 4yo twin boys do with it? They grab the hose, pull it around, fill their containers, dump them anywhere they feel like it - sometimes on plants, sometimes on the fire pit, sometimes too close to someone, or just dump the whole 5-gallon container of water for fun. What does a 6yo girl do? She bosses, screams at them (even if what they're doing really isn't that bad), and creates quite the scene. The 8yo tries to help amidst all of this but also gets frustrated and complains about the younger siblings and tattles a lot. What does mommy while trying to weed while this is going on? Get very frustrated and get upset at the wrong people sometimes or the right people sometimes but not deal with the situation in love.

So that was my morning weeding! When the deed was finally done and accomplished, I knew that it was time to do some thinking about a better way to get the garden watered. So that is my task. Whenever there's a time of day, a task, a situation where things tend to get out of control like that, I try to think it through strategically. What should each of the children be doing? How can they best be a help without causing a problem. If they do start causing problems, what will be the immediate consequence to prevent it from becoming a scene? What rules do I need to have for them to follow during this time?

SO - in thinking through plant watering and weeding time, here are a few things I could do. I could have set turns (3 min. or so) for certain kids to have time to fill the buckets with water (the more desired job). I could have each of them weed their own area of the garden while someone started in with spraying another area of the garden. I could have the most likely to act out children weed next to me - especially if they're not on their best behavior. I could assign them each specific plants to water so they're each going to different areas.

I haven't laid out the whole plan, but to do this I should start by listing all the specific areas to weed and water and specific tasks that need to be done to accomplish this. After I have my list of things that need to be done, I can figure out what order they should be done and who should do what and then think of how to have each of the children occupied during this time and what I should be doing. So that will be my plan - hopefully before the next time I need to water with all of them!

Other areas to strategically plan can include: mealtimes - who does what to get it ready and what will they all be doing during this time, bedtimes, chore times, school times, getting out the door and back in the door, and many other times. The idea is that whenever you find yourself frustrated repeatedly with a situation, pray about it and strategically plan how to better handle that situation in the future.