I'm doing a story for the Courier Westside about the EduKids co-op that I plan to join next year. I spoke with the oldest board member, Cindy Francis, yesterday. I am VERY excited about what they have to offer. The co-op goes from preschool on up to high school. It costs $75 per family PER YEAR! They meet once a week and have four classes, 2 academic subjects, gym and some type of club. Cindy said they do more science and art than she has ever done in her whole school career, and more than she ever would have done with her kids if it had been just her.
I love the idea of the co-op. For years I have been trying to be super structured, basically a different person. When I realized I couldn't entirely be that I almost gave up on homeschool. But now that I have accepted my strengths for what they are and learned to relax I realize that I can give my children what they need. Still, I am very excited about the chance to do something a little more formal. And I'm glad it's only once a week!
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I attended my first Homeschool Conference this last weekend. I had been meaning to go for a few years but several things, including a severe mental block whenever the word “homeschooling” came up, prevented me from ever attending. Now that I have learned a little about life, school and relaxing I no longer feel like dry-heaving whenever I think of school and I’m able to relax and enjoy myself.
The exhibition hall was daunting, but I didn’t have any money to spend so I didn’t feel any obligation to purchase anything. There is much to choose from but at this point my kiddos are too young for me to worry about curriculums, so I felt no pressure. I just looked around for people I knew. My daughter rode happily on my back in my Babyhawk Mei Tai, and I walked around complimenting other women on their carriers.
The keynote speaker was Todd Wilson of Family Man ministries and boy, was his message something I needed to hear. He poked fun at many of the homeschooling myths, legends and conventions that we are so used to. His main focus was the idea that no one is living the perfect homeschool life, that all of us are screwing up in a million ways and that it doesn’t really matter in the long run. As someone who spends a great deal of time comparing myself to others it was a huge blessing to hear someone be funny and candid about having a messy house and eating cereal for dinner. He emphasized transparency and vulnerability, something a couple of my other friends are trying to do with each other. I feel many of my intimidations melting away.
At one point during the day I felt really tired and I rolled up my Babyhawk and used it as a pillow. I sat Alice on the ground and let her tear up a catalog while I closed my eyes for a few much needed minutes. Every once in a while I would open them and she would still be sitting in the same spot, just ripping away. I might not have been comfortable enough to do that before, but I felt no need to impress anybody. It was kind of fun to feel that free!
The teachable moments continue. The other day right as I was scolding Jarvis he suddenly looked up and said “Mommy, what kind of bird is in that tree?” I looked up from my vantage point at the van door expecting to see a sparrow or a robin and instead I was surprised to see a very LARGE bird roosting in the neighbors tree! I couldn’t see it’s head but something about the bluish color and white spots on the wings made it look very familiar.
Later we googled it and low and behold, there was a Pileated Woodpecker in my neighbors tree, in the middle of the city! My grandmother is surrounded by woods on three sides of her home and the site of a Pileated Woodpecker in one of her trees is a rare and celebrated occurrence! I asked Jarvis if this bird looked like the one he saw and he agreed that while he had not seen the birds head the body did look like the picture.
We looked at a few pictures of woodpeckers, and listened to some audio files of woodpeckers calling and the sound of them hammering on the trees. I asked Jarvis if he knew why woodpeckers peck at trees and he said he didn’t know. I gently pressed him to think about it. “To get a worm?” Exactly! We read the Wikipedia entry on woodpeckers, which I then explained in plainer language, and we ended our session by watching some Woody Woodpecker cartoons on You Tube.
It is my prayer that I will always treat his curiosity with such reverence, that I will take hold of every teachable moment. I am also determined to keep trying to be the best that I can be, even if my best is cereal for dinner.
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So, I've been considering myself a homeschooler for the past 2-3 days even though my son is technically still in preschool. Today we ate a bunch of Easter candy, the boys played outside in the rain, I did some cleaning. We read out of the Childcraft Encyclopedia from 1964 and read a chapter of Little House in the Big Woods. We watched 2 episodes of How It's Made, where we learned how they make breakfast cereal, one of Jarvis's passions. From this he learned what a vegetarian is, which he found quite shocking. "But...meat is GOOD for us!" I have to agree!
One episode of Dexter's Laboratory (which unfortunately isn't as educational as it sounds, haha. It mostly just makes my son act obnoxious.) And my kids watched The Miracle Maker for about the 5th time since Saturday. I'm amazed that my Scooby Doo, Spiderman loving boys are so obsessed with it. It's a beautifully done Claymation film but I have to believe there is more to it than that. They both talk about Jesus non-stop, and ask tons of questions. I think I am going to get them The Good and Evil comic book that nogreaterjoy.org sells. They'll probably go crazy over it!
I told Linus I am his teacher now and while we were reading he very sweetly said "Teacher, after we read can I do my craft?" I told him yes, after his nap. My mom is a children's librarian and she sends home the leftover crafts from story time. We did a mosaic Easter Egg. Later Jarvis got out his "Homework" in the form of a workbook my mom got him. The day before he showed NO interest in it whatsoever. But without any prompting from me he practiced writing his letters, counting, etc. I sat down and we talked it over together. He really enjoyed it! I think I am going to keep these books around for him to discover on his own.
Jarvis reminds me so much of me...he does NOT want to be bossed about school, but he loves to learn on his own and will ask for help, but don't offer it! Don't interfere with his boundaries. I remember feeling pushed as a child and it making my skin crawl. I think unschooling will be a great fit for both of us.
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I remember being exposed to some pretty raunchy music on my hour long bus ride to school. At the time I knew my parents wouldn't like it, and now I'm pretty disgusted that our bus driver didn't switch it off. I feel like my innocence was assaulted. But that's nothing compared to this.
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From the moment I heard the word "homeschooling" I felt a small fire light inside me. Always an outsider, I felt that homeschooling was my unfulfilled destiny. I told my mom I felt that I had been homeschooled because every important thing I ever learned came from my intellectual and cultured oddball parents.
I first became aware of homeschooling through my friend, fellow blogger rachaelc, who became my dearest friend throughout high school and the rest of life to this very day. I even interviewed her for an article I wrote on homeschooling for the high school magazine. So, homeschooling has been in my plans for a good 14 years. I knew that I was going to give my children the education I should have had.
But of course, as John Lennon once sang "life is what happens while you're busy making other plans." Marriage and children didn't solve my problems, but they served as a magnifying glass to my flaws. Depression and anxiety are a constant battle for me, along with organization. Adding a third child threw me into an upheaval. The pregnancy was difficult, I was babysitting a little boy who was very hard to manage, and I felt overwhelmed.
I became convinced that homeschooling was not in my future. For starters, every time I thought about researching it I felt sick. I couldn't get motivated. My eldest son and I butt heads constantly. I never have time to do anything. I was rapidly losing my confidence. I was losing my mind.
My husband noticed my fragility and we decided to send my boys to preschool. The eldest would go three times a week, and the youngest would go once a week. We are nearing the end of the year now.
This experiment has been a complete success. It has made me realize that what I really want to do is homeschool. Preschool was by no means a negative experience, but it feels very foreign to me. I am the type of person who needs to experience things to get the full understanding, and this is what I have learned about myself.
1. Living according to someone else's schedule does not help me. I had visions of having tons of free time. Instead, I spend most of the time my son is at preschool nursing the baby and putting in a movie for my other son. I have just enough time to rush through my errands, or rush through my chores, but because I have to keep driving to and fro I really don't have large blocks of time to get things done.
2. I have no time to spend doing fun things with my kids because I am living according to the school's schedule. I am paying people to do things with my kids that I actually enjoy doing myself, and I could probably do better.
3. I enjoy being in charge of my children's choices, and not having to explain them. I seemed to be the only person at preschool who had to sign a vaccination waver, or who provided juice so my kids wouldn't drink red Kool-Aid. It can be tiring to live in one world when your convictions place you in another.
4. The days my kids missed school due to weather were my favorite days. I wasn't running around exhausting myself, I got a lot done and I got to spend time with my favorite people.
5. I am not a 9-5 person, yet my whole life I have been told I need to acclimate myself to this world. This can be true, but it is also true that there is room in the world for all kinds of people. As a freelance writer, I can move in the business world and in my own circle. I need to have the freedom to parent this way as well. I try to make sure we are on time to planned activities, but with three little unpredictable children I prefer having some flexibility in my daily life.
The other day I caught my eldest putting Spiderman stickers up and down the wall of the staircase. I redirected his efforts and suggested we make cards. He made an Easter card for his friend Matthew. I cut out the shape of an egg, and he put eleven Spiderman stickers on the outside. He dictated a message for the inside. "Happy Easter Matthew. Learn about God. You must get an Easter Egg." Of course, being me I entirely forgot to take it to church on Sunday. Jarvis decided to mail the card. Usually I would balk at this...there is something inside me that completely rebels against mailing things. Normally I would have just preferred to wait and take it the next Sunday. But I realized this was a teachable moment suddenly nothing became more interesting to me than taking my kids to the post office. I actually looked forward to running this errand.
On a school day, I would have been irritable and rushed through. I might have even just locked the car and run in. More likely I would have asked my husband to just mail the things for me. But knowing that I had an opportunity to teach my son lit a fire in my heart that I hadn't felt in a long time. We spent a good 10 minutes just walking around the building talking about everything we saw. We noticed that they had Marvel Comic stamps and decided to buy some (this was completely unnessesary, but I really wanted him to enjoy his trip. It felt important.)
After the tour Jarvis walked straight up to the counter and announced "I have two words to tell you. Number 1, I need to mail a card to my friend Matthew. Number 2, I need to buy a Spiderman Stamp." The man behind the counter was very kind and even gave my kiddos some Star Wars "stickers" cut from the tops of stamp sheets that had been used up.
Something about walking into that building with three kids in tow, one on my back and one holding each hand, felt positively organic to me. As I walked and talked I felt I was living my real life. And I feel that way when we cuddle on the recliner before nap time reading a few pages from the Childcraft encyclopedia and a chapter of Little House in the Big Woods or Mrs. Piggle Wiggle. I know I will still struggle with depression from time to time. But somehow I feel that fullfiling this destiny will give me strength in a way that following status quo never could.