How do you give comfort to a dear friend when her husband is suddenly killed in a car accident?  What do you say to comfort her when she is living your worst nightmare? 

My friend lives back in Rochester (near where I am from).  I have only corresponded with her occasionally....like all my friends back home.  I am a horrible pen pal.  Good intentions but no follow thru.  I am even shocked that I have logged into my blog as much as I have.    Now, she is a widow and I can't be there for her.  I know she has her children and grandkids.  I know she has her sister and many, many friends.  But I, too, want to be there for her.  I have no wonderful words of comfort.

I asked my sister in law, who has been a widow for some almost 4 years now (is that possible??)  She too, lost her husband suddenly and without any kind of warning.  She kissed him good-bye and next thing she knew, she got a phone call that he had had an aneurism.  We were not in town when it happened.  I think she got to the hospital, but he was gone already.  The same thing for my friend.  Would it be any better or less traumatic if they had had a warning?  I just don't know.  I don't want to find out.

My friend's husband loved her dearly.  He loved his children and his grandbabies.  I know that he loved her because I saw how he looked at her when she wasn't looking at him.  I only met him a few times, but I saw the look...longing, love, devotion, tenderness all wrapped up in a gaze that he would give her as he looked upon her.  He was devoted and caring, loving and funny, intelligent and creative.  He indulged her and took care of her.  They were married for almost 40 years.  He was the love of her youth and they were just settling in to, what I think, was their favorite time of life...retirement and grandparenthood.

My heart is just sick.  I know that God is there for her.  That He grieves with her and that He is there to hold her and fill the incredible void left in her life.

Keep the widows and widowers in prayer.  Listen to them tell you of their loved one...over and over if you have to.  Remember them long after the funeral has passed, the funeral meal is eaten and the flowers have wilted.  They need the love and comfort of others.

"Behold, I with you always...."

He is Risen, Just as He said!