My Journey Toward A Trusting Heart

Moving Stones and More

I think I mentioned in an earlier entry that I'm on the weight-loss wagon. Again.

Yes, I've been a yo-yo dieter for years. Deadly serious about it maybe three times in the past twenty or so years. This is the third, AND LAST, time I'm getting serious about it. Once I get it off, it ain't coming back on.

I've given much thought to the process...and back we go to my reality that I am truly a destination person and barely tolerate the journey. Well, that may be a bit harsh...to not tolerate it, but its really difficult for me to be patient. Espeically with myself.

I have often read things that talk about the Journey -- ANY journey. And life IS one. Every aspect of life is one. Tough for people who like to BE there but don't like GETTING there. That would be me. But I'm somehow, finally, coming to terms with the fact that it just doesn't work that way.

And what is so ridiculous about that is that in years gone byI have encouraged people about THEIR journeys. Telling them, "God prepares us at Point A for moving to Point B; we can't get to Point M without passing thru all the Points in front of it." We can only reach a goal by going through various steps. We don't just wake up one day 80 lbs thinner.

You may have read a recent post I stuck into the "Article" section...the "Stones" or "Rocks" entry...and I've been thinking about that, and may have to re-write it a bit.

first of all, there are things in life that are huge obstacles. We all have them, to varying degrees. But some of those 'mountains' are probably not going to be moved. What 'may'happen is that God, in His great wisdom (isn't that an understatement!) may simply give us the grace and strength to GET OVER IT.

I've seen the perspective of Him moving mountains, "one rock at a time" -- but that only applies to certain things in life. For instance -- in my weight loss efforts...my weight is not going to come off in one big blast. This experience, or 'journey', if you will, is a perfect example of something happening one stone, or pound, at a time. Being overweight is not a state of mind that I have to 'get over.' Sure, there's a measure of self-confidence, believeing in who I am in Christ and all that...but frankly, being overweight is not healthy. I have allowed this to happen and, if I don't get a handle on it, I may not live to see my boys raised, or see my girls' own babies! AND, I barely have the energy to keep up with my boys as it is. I really hate that...

And not only is it unhealthy, being overweight ruins one's self-image. I do not have the confidence I once had...I KNOW most people -- who do not know me -- judge me based on my looks. Even in the the church (and that's a whole other discussion!)...but I'm just tired of feeling self-conscious, frumpy...etc.

Yes, most of it is pride. But you know what...I also believe its just a reflection of what I believe I deserve as a child of God; as Mark's wife, as my kids' mom...I deserve to be healthy -- God intended it from the Beginning. He intends me to live life to the fullest -- I cannot do that at this weight.

I KNOW I have been robbed of wonderful opportunities for ministry because of the image of my weight. In my eyes It suggests gluttony, lack of self-discipline...and it has nothing to do w/ my genes. I did this to myself.

Thing is, I'm much more forgiving of others for not being their ideal weight...I do NOT base my friendships on what my friends look like. But somehow I don't apply that same grace to myself. Dumb. But true.

So, in life, there are things we can see God MOVE -- the stones in our way that come down a little at a time...like someone getting well after a car crash; like recovering from a surgery; like recovering from a stroke -- as I did! -- and in other ways there are things we simply must learn to climb.

Sometimes He moves the mountains, and sometimes He just gives us strength to climb! (I think I head a song about that lately!)

So, whatever our situation, God gives us the grace to do what needs to be done. We either do our part to move the stones (in my case, 'pounds'), or we stay the course and find the strength and grace to keep moving toward the summit.

My mountain is moving...10..6 lbs as of last Wednesday. Weigh-in is tomorrow. I'll report back how it went.

Please send me a note, will you, and share your own perspective on this.

Oh, and one more thing...I just learned that I have been published for the first time, in a print magazine!! Its the March/April 2007 issue of "Hearts at Home"... I don't know if you can access any of it on line, but you can try at: www.hearts-at-home.org

Its my "YAMGT' article....I didn't know they'd accepted it until I rec'd a couple copies in the mail yesterday! I'm excited, and now confident about submitting other things here and there!

And thanks to all of you who have enocuraged me thru the years...its paying off. I'm finally believing it!

Wonderful post

8:22 AM, Apr. 2, 2007 .. Posted by LizzieBee

Thank you for this post. Like so much in life, recovery is about moving one stone at a time. That is such wisdom to remember, especially for me right now. Thank you. I'm going directly to the link to read your article!