Sep. 29, 2008 - Monday recess

kids are outside playing happily.  I hope

I am thinking about this weekend.  Friday night my husband and son went on a bike ride with some others with a group called "Ride Civil."  It is to show support of our town having folks learn how to deal with cyclists on the road and share the road.  I don't know if folks are getting it though.  There's a lot of hollarin' at the cyclists, gunning it, and not moving over.  It is somewhat fearful for me to think about b/c it's my 9 yr. son out there.  The net reaction to the fear is anger.  So I get so angry sometimes at folks who don't scoot over.
Well, that was Friday night.
Saturday morning, we had "soccerfest".  This was a fun day for the kids at the soccer field.  For my team of under 5s, we had 3 short games spread out over the morning.  I think it was a little much.  The first scheduled game, a teenager volunteered to ref the game (great!).  This was supposed to happen, but the big kids didn't have enough command to say to the coaches, "I got this--step aside."  I think I understood the meaning in this, but it caused a little confused for the kids to have another big kid on the field and the parents who might not have know we were to expect a teenager to step up and do this. Between games, jumping things and blow-up slide-y things were around to play.  We also played "Beat the Keeper."  There was also a dunking booth.  Well, on the second scheduled game, our opposing team didn't show and the earlier game was missing an opponent, so they were playing against themselves.  Then 5 collegiate players showed up on the field to say "we want to help."  So, as coach, I say "come on.  Let's all play."  That might have been too much.  We left after a hot dog lunch in the only shade we could find and went home.
  After a long nap, we went to our Torah Club.  My husband and I were in charge of leading the children in a study.  We got through the Scripture reading and then turned to put on the CD and realized we'd left it in our CD player at home so we could do nothing.  We tried the best we could do to retell the story that was used. Thankfully not all the children that are usually there were there.   After we were done, it was potluck time.  We shared a meal.  As we were leaving, we were invited to one of the other family's church.  So we decided  we do that.
  Sunday morning: my husband goes to a men's study that he hasn't been to before.  It was a Jewish Code of Ethics meeting.  I won't go into his thoughts about that.
  Then he gets back and we go to this other church.  Now at this other church, I have so many friends here.  A lot of friends used to go to the church I go to now.  I saw a lot of them.  These are very close friends, even now.  I miss them.  It makes me want to go to this church.  However, my husband doesn't feel led to change.
  So now my internal tormoil begins... I know I'll stay with him, but it's hard to be happy.  I'm having to pretend at church that I'm happy to be there, but I'm not.  I like the people that are there.  I haven't met a single person that goes there that I just don't like or don't want to talk to.  But there's something missing when I go.  My husband knows my feelings, but says that God is not leading him to move.  So I stay.  I try.  I hope that things will get better.  I do have hope that things will get better.  We have just recently been involved with yet another group, from our church, that lets the kids come and be there.  I have much hope that this will help with that empty feeling that I can't seem to explain.
So then, that brings me to Sunday night (my next post will be about Sunday afternoon).  We had the group from our church that I just mentioned meet at our house.  Two of the four regular couples couldn't be there, but another one came and I invited our new children's minister and his family to come and they came.
It was very good and encouraging, but still I have questions and reservations.  We'll see.