Posted in Confessions of an Imperfect Momma

This is a phrase I heard a lot last year. Truly, last year was very trying. I was raising 6 young children --  ages 10 and under -- without my husband who was away on military orders. I was dealing with cancer, surgery, radiation, and a few other health issues. I was homeschooling and running our household alone. Many of you are also facing difficult circumstances right now. I'd like to share just how I did it so it may encourage you where you are.

First and foremost, I learned to rely on Jesus my Christ in new and deeper ways. FROG -- Fully Rely On God. Nice token phrase, right? But what does that mean, practically speaking? It means praying a lot. Not necessarily a formal, scheduled devotion time. Although this is a good thing, it wasn't always practical for me. I discovered the meaning of I Thessalonians 5:17 "Pray without ceasing." I prayed all day long. Not continuously but continually. I prayed for strength. I prayed for wisdom. I prayed for help. Sometimes I didn't know what to pray, so I just said, "Jesus." This continual recognition of Who my source was carried me through when I had no strength left. I also read my Bible asking the Lord for insights for my specific situations. He always provided. And I journaled. I recorded what was happening in my life, what I was praying, what I was reading in the Bible, what revelations the Lord was giving me. Often, just re-reading my prayer journal was enough to encourage me for a new day.

Secondly, I learned to take things one moment at a time. Really. I learned that I can only do what's in front of me right now. Focusing on one thing at a time, and doing my best on that one thing, kept me from feeling overwhelmed with everything else that was on my figurative plate.

Thirdly, I let my house go. As much as it pained me to have a "dirty" house, I had to come to terms with the fact that I could only do so much. My older children had regular chores and I cleaned A LOT as well, but we just couldn't keep up with everything. This meant that things were dusty. Floors needed to be mopped. There was always a pile of laundry to be washed and another pile of laundry to be folded and put away. I rarely went to bed with an empty sink. (We did not have a dishwasher, so everything had to be hand-washed which takes a lot longer.) Clutter piled up here and there. It wasn't very pleasant, but I quit beating myself up mentally over it.

Finally, I learned to ask for help. This was very humbling for me because I am a task-oriented, self-sufficient person. I did not like to admit I was in over my head. I did not like to ask people to come to my house and see my inadequacies. But I truly needed other people more than ever before. My parents and my husband's parents were incredibly helpful. I couldn't have made it through without the help they provided. Others that helped were other family members, church members, families from our homeschool support group, friends and neighbors. Essentially, I made myself vulnerable to everyone I knew. But it paid off. The Lord used them all to meet our needs. Some people helped only once, some people helped out on a weekly basis. What mattered was not who did what or how often but how God met our needs through the serving hands of others throughout the year.

This year we have been re-united with my husband. I'm having semi-regular devotions in the morning. I'm keeping up with my housework. Our homeschooling is going very well. My health is greatly improved with no signs of cancer. And I am making many healthful changes in our lifestyle. I've learned so many things, especially spiritual lessons. I wouldn't trade last year for anything. It was worth it all because I wouldn't be where I am today without it. I thank God for loving me enough to grow me.