Posted on my category page: Words of Wisdom

When I ask my children to do a task, they occassionally whine, "I can't!" My response to them is simply this phrase,

" 'I can't' means 'I won't try.' "

There certainly are times that we cannot do something and we legitimately need help. We must be humble enough to admit this and ask for help. It is our Christian duty to serve one another and when we ask others for help we give them the opportunity to serve the Lord by serving our needs.

However, we need to not abuse this, nor train our children to do so. If it is something we can do, we should. If we must pray for strength, patience, endurance, wisdom, forgiveness, and/or grace to get it done, then we should. We must at least try the task. We must give an honest effort. And we must teach our children to do the same.

~Layla

Posted on my category page: Words of Wisdom

Like so many other values, we seem to have lost the value of hard work in this country some time in the past few generations. I confess that I don't love to work hard. But the Lord is changing this in me as well as many other areas of my character. The Lord began my training by teaching me the meaning of this phrase:

Anything worth doing is worth working hard for.

For me, the lesson started in the middle of the night just before Christmas about 2 and a half years ago. At the time I had a 7yo, 4yo, 1yo, and a newborn. My 1yo was still nursing several times a night. My newborn was actually our foster child (whom we were in the process of adopting). He, of course, woke several times a night for feedings (with a bottle). At that time, my husband was working midnights and was unavailable to help with the babies. I was also in the first trimester of pregnancy which caused me to feel more tired than usual. My days were very busy and my nights were very long. My babies rarely woke at the same time; they usually woke in succession. No sooner would I get one back to sleep and fall asleep myself than the other would wake up and need to be fed. I was exhausted! It was a labor of love that the Lord strengthened me for, but I certainly did have difficult nights.

On one particular night, I woke with the newborn who was having a particularly fussy time. His crying awoke the 1yo. I ended up rocking them both in the recliner in the living room. At one point, I was nursing my 1yo while simultaneously feeding my newborn with the bottle. When it came time to burp them, I had one on each shoulder. The newborn began to cry which caused the 1yo to cry. They fed off of each other and just wouldn't stop. It wasn't long before I was crying too. I cried out to the Lord and said, "I need some help. I cannot do this alone. This is just too hard." That beautiful, still small voice spoke to my heart simply, "What's wrong with it being hard?" I was offended! I had expected the Lord to send angels to calm the babies so I could get back to bed. I had hoped he would miraculously change my husband's schedule so he could help me with the bottle-feedings in the middle of the night. I had wished he would send someone over to volunteer to watch my children so I could get a regular nap. But that is not what He did. That is not what He said. He urged me to work hard. He showed me that these beautiful babies were worth the work. He gave me peace and grace and strength to get through this difficult phase. And do you know that just before our next baby was born, both the 1yo (by then almost 2) and the newborn (by then almost 1) both began to sleep through the night. And my husband got off midnights! When the new baby was born, she slept so well I had to wake her for feedings! It took some time, but my sleep was restored.

I now see my responsibilities from a new perspective. When I'm tempted to feel overwhelmed by laundry or to complain about my workload, I am reminded of the words God spoke to me that night. It lifts my spirit and strengthens me for the work at hand. It truly is a joy to work hard, especially when done in love.

~Layla

Posted on my category page: Words of Wisdom

I'm a little obsessive-compulsive, I think. I don't want to do something unless I can do it all at once, do it thoroughly, and do it perfectly. Maybe that's merely perfectionism. Whatever it is, I find its often more of a hindrance than a blessing. So many things go un-done in my life because I know I don't have the time to be thorough or because I start it and its not perfect so I give up on it. The Lord taught me something last year that is changing the way I think:

Start where you are.

See, I had this idea that I wanted to write a meal plan. I wanted to plan breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack, dinner, and evening snack for every day of the week. I wanted a plan that would give us a different dinner every day for 28 days straight. The idea being that I would save time making my grocery list because I would know what I needed for meals all week. I would also save myself the aggrevation of standing in front of the cupboards or refrigerator thinking, "Hmm, what should I make today?" And I would save my family the monotony of eating the same 4 meals for dinner over and over again.

There was one limitation preventing me from completing this meal plan, though. At the same time, I wanted to change our eating habits. So I wanted to include 28 dinner meals that were healthier and more nutritious than those that I usually made. This would mean taking the time to peruse websites and recipe books looking for new meals. I didn't have the time for that so I didn't make the meal plan.

At some point, I decided to ask the Lord to help me get this done and He spoke to my heart the words, "Start where you are." In other words, make the meal plan with meals I already knew how to cook. I would surely still benefit from it. Then I could look for new recipes at my leisure and slowly make replacements in my meal plan. This was much more do-able. I was so encouraged!

I made my meal plan last summer. I have made a few substitutions. I don't always follow it, but when I do it saves me a lot of time and aggravation. My latest project is working on self-discipline so I can stick to my schedule and meal plan.

Do you have a project you've been putting off? Or a project that seems completely overwhelming? Start where you are. What can you do now that will bring you one step closer to getting it all done? Think in baby steps. Think about the do-able, not the impossible.

~Layla

Posted on my category page: Words of Wisdom

I found this quote and it is amazing to me that it still applies to our country today, but a-hundred-fold!

Intoxicated with unbroken success, we have become too self sufficient to feel the necessity of redeeming and preserving grace, too proud to pray to the God that made us.  ~ Abraham Lincoln

No need to say any more.

~Layla

Posted on my category page: Words of Wisdom

In our family we have 2 older children (9 & 6) and 3 younger ones (3, 2, 1). My olders hear me say quite often:

"You are ALWAYS an example."

Their little brothers and sister watch every move they make and hear every word they say. I try to remind them that they need to be conscientious about their actions because they have little people waiting to imitate them! It's a good thought for all of us, though. We may not realize when a younger mom or teenage girl is watching and learning from our actions as a wife and mother. Let us strive to set a good example in all we say and do.

~Layla

Posted on my category page: Words of Wisdom

Just thought I would start a new category of little catch phrases or words of wisdom that have helped me through the years.

In regard to raising children:

If it's not an option, don't give an option!

In other words, if your daughter must put her shoes on in order for you to leave for an appointment on time, don't say "Do you want to put your shoes on?" Instead say, "Please put your shoes on." By asking her if she wants to do it, you are giving her the option to say no. Then what?

If you have a strong-willed child or a child who enjoys making decisions, you can rephrase the direction to give an acceptable option, "Which would you like to put on first, your shoes or your coat?" This instructs him to get ready to go, but gives him an acceptable degree of control over how he gets ready.

~Layla