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It has been since December that I've posted. I apologize to you, my friends, who check in on my blog from time to time... Wow, I can't believe how time has flown. I am getting ready to sell/give away much of my homeschool materials tonight at our Curriculum Fair. It has been very difficult to go through our books, supplies, etc. but I know that is what God is leading us to do right now. The older children are doing relatively well in their school situation, and the two youngest boys are looking forward to joining them next year. I am looking forward to all the opportunities I have to get involved in their lives at school during the day, and the lives of their friends and teachers. Change is not easy. I know that God doesn't ask me to change unless it is for my good, but that still doesn't make it easy. But perspective is so important. I pray daily for a handful of children that are fighting a losing battle against a horrible type of cancer. Even though I've only seen these children in photos, and have gotten to know them through their websites, I love them...and my heart aches to see their families in pain. I pray daily for the Lord to show Himself to them, giving them the hope of eternity with Him....and these precious children whose time here on earth is so short. Remembering what others are going through and lifting them to God in prayer...it gives me the perspective I need to make the changes that God is asking of me. As I am writing this I am hearing some tremendous bumps and thumps coming from upstairs in the boys' bedroom. No cries, so I'm assuming all is "well", but I should at least go and check out what's going on up there! Besides, it's time to start school for the day! I hope everyone has a great day! |
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Good morning, dear family! Just want to wish you all a wonderful day celebrating Jesus! I love you each so much! Feliz Navidad! ~me |
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"Chris, I praise God for bringing you into my life and I know that He has brought us together for the ultimate purpose of serving and glorifying Him. I love you, and I give myself to you. As I seek to grow in God's love and keep Him first, I can love you selflessly and thus, I commit myself to you for as long as we both shall live or until our Lord returns to take us Home. As your wife, I will gladly submit to your headship as unto the Lord. I will cherish you. I will pray with you. I will stand beside you in good times and bad. I will seek to build you up and honor you. To you I make this sacred vow~ You are my beloved and you are my friend." Those words I say to you again today, as sincerely as I spoke them fifteen years ago. I love you. |
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"Love anything and your heart will be wrung, and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal." ~C.S. Lewis "We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own, live within a fragile circle, easily and often breached. Unable to accept its awful gaps, we still would live no other way. We cherish memory as the only certain immortality, never fully understanding the necessary plan." ~Irving Townsend Today my heart aches. Yesterday, our 2 year old miniature Dachshund, Isabella, was hit by a car and killed. I am grieving. I've questioned my maturity and relationship with God because of the deep nature of my grieving. But this I know about myself. I am an all-or-nothing type person. If I love, I love wholeheartedly. A friend kindly teased me about comments I had made about Bellie. "I thought you didn't like her." I didn't alway "like" her, but I loved her deeply. And I will miss her so much. She was cute, and spunky, oh-so-smart. She would climb from the couch onto the piano bench when I was playing and continually drop her little ring toy until I would play with her. If that "subtle" approach didn't work, she would simply climb inyo my lap while I was playing, and proceed to put her front paws on the keys, playing with me. She would always jump into the bathtub to drink the water that was sitting around the drain. (yuk) She loved to snuggle. I'm sure I will write more about her, but for now I have children that need help with homework. |
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Referring to God's Chosen Servant...Jesus Christ.... "He will be gentle-he will not shout or raise his voice in public. He will not crush those who are weak or quench the smallest hope." Isaiah 42: 2-3 and then, over to Philippians 2:5. "Your attitude should be the same that Christ Jesus had." Lord, teach me. |
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Our Adult Bible Fellowship just finished a two-month series on spiritual gifts and being ministers of Christ Jesus. Although I have done studies in the past, this time it impacted me in a very personal and timely way. Here's the thing...Right now, the area of ministry that God has me in is not easy. Some days I really want to say "enough! I can't do it anymore!" And lately, I've had many of those days. BUT, God tells me that I am to serve Him cheerfully in the area He has placed me, He wants me to be WHOLEHEARTED about this. Last Saturday, I was telling my husband how I just wanted to move out into the country and live like a hermit, I just didn't want to interact with people anymore. Then, Sunday morning came and Pastor Mark was teaching from Romans 12...about spiritual gifts, and using them wholeheartedly, representing the body of Christ in a loving and cheerful way. I was convicted and moved as God spoke directly to my heart. My husband (who worked in childcare that day) couldn't wipe the grin off his face as I conveyed this to him on the way home. Truly, my face matched his, as I was so awed by how God spoke to my need so perfectly. And yet, as I've meditated on this all this whole week, I realize that all service done without love is nothing. So, I decided to do a word study on the I Corinthians passage about love. Once again, I was humbled by the knowledge that I fall so short in demonstrating agape love. When hurt or disappointed, I want to pull back in, hide, quit, become proud or judgmental, anything but keep myself in a place of vulnerability. But I know that in order to be obedient to God, I must stay engaged in ministry, serving with a whole heart, a cheeful heart...understanding that it is not people that I am serving, but Almighty God. It should not matter what people say or think or do, all that should matter to me is what God says, what God sees, and what God does. He has told me to minister. He sees my heart. And He gives me the grace I need every day to obey Him.
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"Abraham never waivered in believing God's promise. In fact, his faith grew stronger and in this, he brought glory to God. He was absolutely convinced that God was able to do anything He promised. And because of Abraham's faith, God declared him to be righteous." A friend and I are doing a Beth Moore study...A Woman's Heart....God's Dwelling Place. It is a study of the tabernacle, the place where God chose to meet with His people. This past week we reviewed the first several chapters in Genesis, leading us to why there was a need for the tabernacle. As I was reading about Abraham, this passage brought tears to my eyes, and it tugged on my heart. This year God led us to put our two oldest children into one of the schools in the area, and continue home-schooling our youngest three. I had no idea when we did that how difficult it would be to juggle the two different schoolings, plus the rest of life. Please understand, I am not complaining. I am simply admitting that this has been a lot more complicated than I thought it would be. And honestly, there are days when I want to give up...I don't care (at that moment) whether it means bringing the two oldest back home, or sending the three youngest off to school. I just don't feel like I can go on, because I can't see how it will all work out. Will my oldest children continue to thrive and stay strong in their school? (will they ever get caught up to grade level in math and handwriting?) Will my youngest ones ever learn what I am trying to teach them? (Currently...what is a civilization? What is history?) Will my house ever be clean and organized again? Will I always feel like I am trying to "catch up"? Yes...to all of the above. The children will continue to grow in the grace and knowledge of God at their school. Their principal just told me that they are catching up to grade level in math, and the children have assured me that the different handwriting is getting easier... One of my younger sons excitedly made the connection during a discussion at the dinner table tonight that "the past" is "history". He's learning.... My house will be clean again. Maybe not for 15 more years, but....I can wait. And anyway, is it really that important? ....And yes, I will always be catching up on something. I love my life. I have a lot of it on my plate right now. But I want to live every moment of it to the fullest, believing that He will also give me every thing I need to carry out His will. I want it to bring glory to God by my unwaivering faith in His promises. Lord, teach me to be absolutely convinced of your promises to me! |
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We were supposed to go camping this past week (a gift from some friends-remember my earlier entry?) But the forecast was pretty nasty-looking (tornado watches, high winds, hail, lots of rain...) and so some friends from church offered us the use of their cottage on a lake in Kettle Moraine. We gratefully accepted their generous offer, and got to work changing menu plans and packing! The cottage was so nice to be in and had everything I needed for the few days we were there...all I had to pack was our clothing and food! Well, the first afternoon it drizzled. And that was it. It was a beautiful weekend, no rain, no tornadoes, no hail, just beautiful weather.... I wonder why God has us change our plans, but I may never know. We enjoyed most of the weekend together. On Friday evening, our son with asthma problems had a flare-up (we think a reaction to mildew) and so he and I spent the next couple of days back in town...meeting up with the family on Saturday afternoon for lunch at our favorite family restaurant and a movie at the theatre (BIG treat). On Sunday night we ended our vacation with arm wrestling matches, which were SO much fun...it is so good to laugh! While the vacation was much different than what we expected, it was a lovely time away...time to be together...enjoy the beauty of autumn as we drove to and from town...a time to breathe. Thank you, Lord, for this gift from you! |