I am packing up diapers, frustrated with only finding one diaper pin (i bought two dozen, didn't i?  But they are perfect for capes, these nice metal locking head pins, and they disappear fast.... Still... can't i have two?).  Find the diaper cream, pack the ditty bag, wipes, liners, counting out diapers from the diaper bin as two little girls keep interrupting my count with "mama?  Mama?" 

One more little thing to tell me.  One more thought that hadn't occured to them until i was here, kneeling in their dusky bedroom, feeling the fresh breeze blow in through their window, and hearing the teenagers outside calling to each other.

I can't believe i am going.  It's only three sleeps.  But i wrote on both sides of the paper, individual notes to each one, emergency numbers to call, just in case.  I know Daddy won't do things the same way i do, so i leave a lot unsaid.  He can do it his way.  I hope when i get back he falls on my neck saying "How do you do it?".  Sobbing. 

This has been a great year, but it's seemed to pass at breakneck speed.  Usually my neck breaking.  I kept forgetting to delegate, to shift the load a little bit to my brood of helpers.  Now i am packing up everything i need, everything baby needs, for four days/three nights.  Trying to anticipate what i might need.  Should i bring laundry detergent just in case i need to do a load?  Or hobble through the airport with a great big too big suitcase, stroller, and the cutest baby in the world?

Can i do this?  Really?

I will find out.