Unlike some women I am not softspoken. Whether this is due to a lack of training at an early age or genetics I'm not sure.  Right after high school I worked in a nursing home and grew accustomed to practically shouting for my patients to hear me. Perhaps this carried over into my daily life. All I know is that it is a pain to me today. As hard as I have tried, it seems I am at an impasse with it. 
It causes me deep distress due to the fact that I do not see it as being very feminine at all. As a plus size woman, I am already feeling the strain of appearing less than delicate. More like a dandelion than a rose or carnation.  Then again, women need to be hardy to handle the stresses of life, so perhaps being a dandelion is not so bad after all. 

My idea of a feminine sounding woman is one with a soft tone of voice, not so quiet that it is difficult to hear, nor so boisterous it is easily overheard. So What do you do if your voice carries to the next county? 

In earlier times, girls were taught to speak quietly, softly, in preparation for being women. The Bible tells us that we are to have a meek and quiet spirit. Our conversation is to be chaste, as is our life. We should be discreet-including our tongue.  The tongue can no man tame, according to James. What are we to do?

I believe, dear sisters, that we must go to the heart.  What is in our heart comes out of our mouth.  We cannot tame our tongue if our heart is wild.  Contrary to popular thinking, speaking your mind isn't a good thing, and usually you speak you heart. There is a book I wish to get by Ruth Beechick. In this book she has documented medical proof that speech passes through the heart first. I am not sure what the details are so I will go on.  Sisters, do you have trouble with saying hurtful things? You think it is unintentional, and maybe this is true, but if you can keep the hurtful thought from taking root in your heart it will not pass your lips.  Prov. 31 says "in her tongue is the law of kindness".  That is how a feminine woman should sound. Yes a womanly tone and manner is good. A Graciousness should be there, and if you are like me, you like to talk and your voice is loud, you may decide that you need to retrain yourself to refrain from speaking too much and when you choose to talk, control the tone and volume carefully.  Our words should be gracious and kind. Have you ever thought about how one speaks to a baby? Usually we approach a baby, and do that little high pitched voice, or we whisper just loud enough to be heard.  I am not saying that we need to speak to grown-ups that way, but there are few times when a woman is at the height of being feminine without thinking about it.  Usually at her wedding, giving birth, and tending her newborn baby. I can attest to the FACT that as my children outgrew babyhood, my voice, directed at them, grew too-louder, LOUDER and...... So loud in fact, that some nights at bedtime my throat hurt.  

If you have my problem, perhaps a day of whispering, and practicing speaking only words that edify is in order. That is how a feminine woman sounds.  

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