Proverbs 12:4(KJV) says this: A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.
Wow! Rottenness in his bones~that's a pretty strong term! Throughout Scripture, there are many passages that show the tremendous power that a wife has. The verse cited about is just one of them.
We, as wives, DO have tremendous power. Our power to influence our husbands is almost immeasurable, and so is the responsibility that goes along with that power.
We can be two things to our husbands. We can be his crown to wear, or his cross to bear.
One HUGE way that we become a crown instead of a cross is to submit to our husband's leadership. ( Oh, my, I said the S word, didn't I?~Sorry, but it IS Scriptural). Many people fear that S word, and I did too, until I came to understand that Scriptural submission does not mean being a doormat, or a mindless robot who obeys commands without thought. It DOES mean using your talents, abilities and intellect to truly be your husband's help mate.
Many things have happened in the last year that brought this lesson 'home' to me, but the biggest thing has been in the area of finances, particularly tithing.
I was raised in a home where tithing was practiced faithfully, and without question. My husband was raised in a home where the 'principle' of tithing was given lip service, but if money got tight, the tithe was the first thing to go, with the excuse that 'God understands that we can't afford to tithe right now'.
For a long time, I made the mistake of nagging my husband about our 'sporadic' tithing. He continued to tell me that he WANTED to tithe, but 'we just can't right now'. This was SO frustrating to me!! Finally, I came to realize that GOD alone could change my husband's heart on this issue. So, I started to pray about it. I finally understood that I had stated my case to my husband, and that I needed to leave it at that and let God handle it. I prayed specifically about this for weeks. Then, our pastor began to preach often on the principle of tithing. I prayed more earnestly, hoping these messages would touch my husband's heart. Then, one night on the way home from the evening church service, I asked dh what he thought of the message that night. He told me that he enjoyed the message very much, and that he had been going to the bank once a week, taking out our tithe in cash and tithing for 4 weeks!! I wanted to shout HALLELUJAH!!
Not only had he been tithing, he chose to do it in cash so as to let our giving be in secret as Jesus speak about in the book of Matthew. And, since he was using cash and not checks, I never missed the money at all.
We have been tithing faithfully for a couple of months now, maybe a little longer than that. I can all ready see a difference in our finances. It's odd, in a way. We don't have MORE income coming in, and none of our bills have disappeared, but somehow, they are all being taken care of!! God has been so good and so gracious and merciful to us that not only are our needs being met, but we are going to be able to use Roger's Christmas bonus this year to take our traditional family trip to Pigeon Forge, TN, and to use the rest for Christmas gifts. We don't know yet how much Roger's bonus will be, but I have no doubt that it will be enough. I am just amazed at what God has done for us!!
I am also humbled by the fact that all of this came about AFTER I finally shut up and let my husband make the decision to tithe! I realize now that I would not have wanted him to tithe anyway if he was only doing it so that I would stop nagging him about it. I want him to do it because it is in his heart to do it, and now I KNOW that it IS coming from his heart.
In the New Year, I hope to come much closer to being a crown for Roger to wear, and less a cross for him to bear.
Blessings,
Mom23munchkins
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Posted by mrssulli