I am finding as the girls get older that it is becoming harder to effectively discipline them. The issues are sometimes more subtle and a hardness of heart. We don't have to deal too much with blatant defiance in the older three, although it does occur. Most of the time, it is them treating each other with disregard or just plain meanness. Or, as is the case with one of the girls on a regular basis, the issue is a bad attitude.

I have been praying for a solution because, quite frankly, I feel powerless and tend to erupt with anger. In the past, I rarely became angry, but now it is a daily thing. I hate it! It doesn't feel right. I end up apologizing for my anger while they are apologizing for the infraction.

I know it doesn't have to be like this. I know that if I had a way of disciplining set out in advance with the consequences clearly stated for whatever the problem is that I could handle it without anger and with a calm and maybe even a cheerful heart.

I was thinking of a reward/consequence system. One idea I might try is having a jar on the counter that they fill with pebbles (or some other small item) and as they show positive fruit: obedience, diligence, helpfulness, love towards the sisters, accomplishing chores, etc., I would reward them with a pebble. At the end of the week we would see if they filled the jar and they would be rewarded with an allowance (which we haven't really been good at remembering-which the allowance thing and money stewardship is a whole other issue that I need to work through and get started). During the week, if they display negative traits and behaviors then I would remove a pebble from their jar and give them a chore to do.

This is my idea. If you read this and have any helpful suggestions or see some major problems with this...please comment!

I just received the book Creative Correction by Lisa Whelchel. I am excited to see if it offers any insight that I can use.

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