Homeschooling in Illinois

Apr. 9, 2008

Stages of Grief

I was doing ok yesterday. I was in denial. Denial is a good stage. By evening, I was in the angry and bitter stage. I don't like that one. Today, I have been bouncing around between denial, self pity, and depression. Like I said denial is good. I have this crazy hope that some miracle will happen and we will still move. And then I think about all that we have packed and how depressing it's going to be to unpack in the same house we packed it all in! And then I think God must not love me. And then I get depressed because I have to continue to wash my clothes in the basement! And then I go check my email hoping to find that a miracle happened and they will still buy the house. And then I get bummed because we have to decide if we are still going to try to sell our house and live half packed up and in crazy showing mode (which I am SO ready to be done with - like 8 months ago) or are we just going to give up. But giving up means, well, giving up my dream. Admitting it's over and that we will be here forever. It's not like we can move anytime we feel like it. We have a transfer to rely on. And this neighbor isn't getting better. As the years go by, our house value will go down. It already has. Even if the housing market gets better, this neighborhood is out of luck. I'm sure I would be doing much better if I wasn't pregnant. Pregnant woman are not emotionally stable as it is! I've been trying to keep my mind off of this by thinking about preparing for the baby. I need to figure out what the baby is going to sleep in, where the baby dresser and changing table can fit. If we need to move bedrooms around. Who can sleep with who and where. And I have no solutions. So, that's me today. At least the sun is shining and I can have my windows cracked open. Oh which reminds me of what really makes me angry. Yesterday, it was 10 degrees warmer in the town we were supposed to move to than it was here. 10 DEGREES!!!! Talk about anger and depression and self pity all rolled into one. Man oh man, 10 degrees.... That's the difference between wearing a jacket and breaking out the shorts!

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Comments

Apr. 9, 2008 - Untitled Comment

Posted by eyecorn

I am so sorry to hear about your house woes. It is so TOUGH when these things happen. We had several disappointments when we sold our last house and bought the one we're in. I remember those highly emotional times.

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Oh, the crazy things that happen in my house.... I am the wife of M for 8 1/2 years now. I am the mother of a 10 yo boy - D, 6 1/2 yo boy - N, 4 yo girl - Princess C, 2 1/2 yo boy -Toddler B, and girl Lil' L 1, and a new little blessing due Jan 31. I've been homeschooling since 2003. I lean towards a Charlotte Mason approach, but more often than not, it's "whatever works".

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