Sunday, March 12, 2006 - A Bit of Heartsickness
I'm a bit heartsick today. By that I mean, the cares of this world have overtaken me for the moment. I guess my "human-ness" is showing. (Praise God He gives us humility to admit such stuff.) I tried to "heal" myself after church by digging out my schoolroom -- happily, I can share that some progress was made. Then the kids and I headed to Barnes & Noble for a "date" to read the brandnew picture books we can never afford and sip Double-Chocolate Cream Frappicinos.
My hubby's been gone for two weeks now...and I miss him terribly. (I feel so guilty saying that since I know that soldiers' families face much longer partings. But I maintain that God prepares you differently in such instances -- not that they don't experience heartsickness, too. Stuart used to travel ALL the time, and, while I missed him, I knew it wouldn't be long before he returned. It's amazing to think that years ago when we "dated" across the ocean for five years we'd go for over four months without seeing each other. LOL!) Hence, my heartsickness.
I guess it hit me today when he flew from Qatar to Bahrain for the day to await a new visa, and I couldn't chat with him....he just felt SO far away. You share so much with your spouse that no one else in all of the world understands: memories together and little private jokes that only you and your spouse know. Makes me feel for widows/widowers. A pastor once shared with me that widows/widowers feel loneliest at night when there's no one to share the day's events with...no one to cuddle up to.
My hubby's return date should be March 21st. So only a week to go. I know God will keep me through that much time...He's always been faithful to us -- now's my turn to be faithful to Him.
My second reason for heartsickness is our dear rabbit, Lulu. She turned 8 last month. (I've been raising rabbits for 24 years, and I've never had a rabbit make it to that age.) But with her most recent birthday came sudden paralysis of her back legs. While many think "she's only a rabbit," she's been a member of the family for 8 years. It's hard to think of letting her go...and esp. having to deal with that alone at the moment. She's happy within herself and munches on tidbits of food, but I know the time for hard decisions is coming. Hence, my second bout of heartsickness.
Still in all, tomorrow is a brandnew school week. I love Mondays in the sense that it's a clean slate -- it's the start of a new week. It's cleaning day. It's the day to put the house back in order after the "down time" of the weekend. Emily's been practicing for her PSSA exams in two weeks. She'll have a light schoolwork load tomorrow since it's also dance class day. Edward enjoys that time because he gets to spend time with me in the cafe on the bottom floor of the dance studio.
Thanks for letting me share my heartsickness. I feel "better" already.
God IS faithful! Keep looking UP!
Comments
Monday, March 13, 2006 - You are #1 on our minds today....
Posted by amlp311
We prayed for you and Stuart last night at small group and today Kyle asked me if I had talked to you today; you were on his mind as well as mine. I hate that I did not talk to you today, but I was sending you many hugs regardless...
