i wish i had more time with ky... to read, to talk, to play whatever games he wants me to. ... to just be there.

it's bn so different since he's been in school. so hard to build on the relationship.

so much time in a  day...yet so little time for *us*.  has it been worth it?

the year is almost up...  and what has *being part of the system* done for us???

-academically, i see negligeable progress. (and in written english a noticeable decline.)

-physical & creative input, almost non-existant.

-science and nature interaction, minimal.

-malay, #@*6#@# ... after a year of daily classes, he is still unable to string a sentence together on his own. (and the class size is small. mb 12 kids)  cd he hv achieved more if we'd had a tutor come to our home? cd he achieve more this coming year if we did just that? 

on the up-side...

-he shows a growing interest and ability in reading. exposure at school is positive.

-social skills, have blossomed.  he is forging, breaking and keeping new relationships independently of us.

presenlty it's hard to tell if the negatives outweigh the positives. 

how long will i wait to see if it rights itself?

if my other half agreed with me (and if ky was willing)  then i'd probably call it quits at the end of this year... and just do what i know best... but i am not him and he is not me....

a *year out* would be nice...   it wd certainly give him time to catch up with his malay.... a big bugbear at present.  and just think of all the things we could do!!!

but i'm talking myself in circles. and that's not a good way to get anywhere!...

so i'd better go and do something more constructive :)