"You're not giving me enough attention!" ....some sad words from a very sad boy tonight.  :(

Something no mum wd like to hear.

I think that with school taking up so much time, he's starting to miss all the 'together-times' we used to have while he was still homeschooling. 

Is there a solution?

Is this why he's been reacting the way he has? He's trying to get my undivided attention?

I think I need to have a good talk with the little man and try get to the bottom of this.

this week ky gave his 1st oral presentation during the school assembly.  i was so pleased for him!

he volunteered in advance... along with 5 or 6 other P1's.

his choice of topic: the F16 fighter jet  ( he's a boy through and through!) 

he practised all week, then happily shared his 'prize' with kayla as soon as he got home. ...2 pens and 2 erasers... thankfully easy to split :))

well done brave one!

e kids and scouts were to walk from e new mrt stop past braddell/ lornie rd. (i forget e name of it now)... to town (near e padang/ kallang river basin) to see e fireworks last saturday.

kayla was reeeallly keen. she set her uniform out the night before, and was bubbling over w excitement.  however, for her it was not to be; she was woken by a nice fever.

e poor girl was so insistent though... so i promised her that she cd come along with us, and that i'd take her alone on a little hike down the canal while the others were having their briefing... then she was to go off with daddy for a nice icecream treat.)

so she had her little half-hour walk with me, then went off for a date with her daddy. all happy.

kynan and i headed off with our bags full of water, milo and snacks. it was quite a good pace and the kids handled themselves marvelously. the overhead bridges were a bit of a drag... and at those times i was glad that kay was not with me... i cdnt imagine dragging her tired legs up them... and certainly wdnt hv wanted to carry her lithe 18kg frame up and down them!

dinner was at ard 7pm, but neither ky nor i were terribly hungry. thirsty yes, but no appetitie when we r walking.

so when we stopped at a bunch of coffeshops, we reluctantly stocked up on some food.  we bought 20satay, a pkt of chicken rice, and 6 bananas...all for later. :) 

as it turend out, the rest of the scouts all sat down to tuck in, so we sat down too and decided to quench our thirst.  i tempted ky to try some satay. good thing too!... he/ we nibbled with relish. then we moved on to the bananas. :b

when we all set off again... half an hr later, ky commented how he suddenly felt so fresh, like he was just setting out at the start of the hike. strangely i felt the same... the food had really given us a spring in our step! the human body is really truly amazing! and we were sustained until the end!

b4 we knew it, the sun was setting over the kallang river, and darkness fell... lights a-twinkling on the dark water. as the time neared 8pm, i arranged for dh to try meet us at our end-point... which was errr? an unknown location somewhere ard e basin. :)  i wd have taken e train w ky as we were still quite fresh, but kay app refused to eat until she'd joined us... and of course, she didnt want to miss e fireworks!

so with our mobile phones, we managed to relate our surroundings back and forth to one-another, and qt by fluke, came out at e same side of e expressway bridge over e river.... kay was bubbly when she saw us... all girly and cute, and quick to hold my hand as i walked.  as it turns out, we were just a stone's throw from our final destination... a little construction site which afforded us a good view of the bay.  so she didnt have very far to walk.

that dusty bit of wasteland is where we got comfy for a bit, while the kids finished their dinners and snacks, then oohed and aahed at the fiery spectacle over the bay.

and when it was time to go back, dear kynan was in for a surprise.

- "are we going back to e mrt?' he asked.

"yes", i replied.

-"u mean the same one we started at?"  (note, that wd be another 4-5hr walk away ;))

"yes", i said... in a rather serious tone.

-"oh," came his reply.

me: "is that ok?... we've got enough water and snacks rt?"

-"er, my water's finished," he says quaveringly, as we continue our walk.

"nevermind, i still have enough for us both. we'll be fine"

-"ok," comes his undaunted response... as we walks on resolutely.

poor kid. he'd forgotten that daddy was now with us, that kay was with us too, and that it was way past her bedtime.

but Aunty J kept up the game...

'dont worry kynan, that stop is only one away from bishan. u can take a train home from there."

me: "nah, remember we past by braddell rd on the way here?... so when we go back that way, we just need to keep walking straight down it, then we'll end up in bishan!"

ky: "oh, ok."

me: "anyhow, i wdnt want to pay to take e train just one stop away rt?...we might as well save e money and walk." 

ky: in a slow deliberate voice... "yah, we shdnt waste our money like that..."

poor kiddo...he really believed me!... only when we got to e padang mrt carpark did his eyes suddenly glisten, and a faint smile tip his lips... and yes, that's when i pointed a finger sideways to my hubby... asking ky what he thought he n kay were doing there. 

very faaaarny....    he shared with me later that he thought he and i cd well hv walked back together that night... "cos we are quite fit", he added, "and we still had some energy left " :)   yes, i think we cd have my dear.  (but kayla wdnt have thanked me for it!.... cos she was more than ready for bed!  :))

tonite we ended up discussing the pro's and cons of s'pore city life for kids growing up now, vs life in south africa when i grew up.

this was a totally impromptu conversation started tonight after lights-out, by one thoughtfull little boy.

and it began with a question, or rather a statement:
"mum, daddy doesnt like animals does he?" :>

so i had to explain how daddy grew up in a very different environment to mummy...

which led to kynan's 'if only'.... ie if only we cd be having that kind of childhood...

but i explained how fortunate they r to be exposed to animals and the great outdoors *inspite* of their environment. :)  which wasnt convincing enuff for him...

so for almost an hr we talked abt all the things they're exposed to now in s'pore, which i never had as a child... aside from fab experiences (such as our annual camping trips).... i had to point out that at that time, we had 8kids in the house at 1 point, so there wasnt always that much of everything to go around... eg new things were only seen at birthdays and Christmas... oh and did i mention there were no roller-skates, skateboards, bikes etc, and pls dont mention gym classes, archery, rock-climbing....and daily treats?

yes, it makes them sound totally spoilt!  they are indeed very fortunate here... fortunate to hv more than 1 pair of shoes... toys galore, and no shortage of fun trips all over the island.  

hopefully it's balanced out the draw of a large house, rambling garden, pool, and a yard full of 2-and 4-legged feathered furry friends to pet. 

convinced? gotta wait-n -ee!

ky's bn sick since our trip... still is. so he's been home doing e-learning. :)

unfortunately it wasnt as easy as i'd envisaged... not him doing e work, nah that's a piece of cake... he prob finished it all in less time than it took me to read through e stuff, figure out e order, locate a lesson-plan (mia), then download and print it all! 

yah, having to print a bunch of stuff is not that smart on e school's part...esp if one particular mama is not prepared for such...(expecting to be doing & submitting e work online only)  ...so low on ink, n unable to go shopping for e stuff!  had to save e work n squeeze it onto fewer sheets, cut-n-paste here n there. more like homework for me ;) 

another fix, getting e malay work v late in e week... and i'm in a spot now....dont understand a word of it!... not e lesson-plans/ letter/ powerpoint.   so it wd be interesting me trying to direct his learning!... ;)  and dh? ah that wd be good if he were home... but with e h1n1, he's leaving for work b4 sunrise, n coming back wen it's dark... so while i get e kids to bed, he's eating dinner n fast asleep by e time i emerge.... so not much help on that front....

fortunately tho, the rest of e schoolwork has been a breeze for him... some workbook-style eng w/shts, a whole bunch of similar math ones... along w some journal-writing, show-n-tell prep, n e usual spelling.  e w/shts were more quantity than quality...so we supplemented with plenty of reading, book reviews, narration, intro to poetry/ haiku & blank verse, and even some letter-writing.  it still left us time for art (drawing/ sword-making/ n mosaic), as well as p/e (long walks along e canal, bike-riding, gym, and some dualing with home-made swords!)

e change in tack has got him asking abt homeschooling again...

"S is so lucky to be homeschooling now.".... "oh wdnt it be nice if x,y,and i cd all join him...then we cd hv our own lessons together while e little-ones have p/grp!" ....

"yes, wdnt it be nice!" :-)

1)  the day i put on a skirt that i'd not worn in ages...

-"mum, you look too girly!"

2)  while reading 'the swiss family robinson' tonight...

-"eeeee!...mussels are so disgusting! i've seen the chinese people eat them at a restuarant.... argh! they make me feel sick!... yugh, dont talk about them!"

3)  after observing dh stuck with his nose in a book for the last 24hrs... (as opposed to e tv~)

-"mum, when u 1st met Bal, did he read books?" :b

ky:- "mummy, today is the 111th day of school!"

me:- "how do u know that?"

ky:- "i counted in my head."

me:- "oh, how did u do that?"

ky:- "i just did."

me:- "did u use a calendar?"

ky:- "nooooo.... now that wd be difficult!"

?????

....so now i'm off to go and check ;)

1)  coming home tearfully one day...

... "mum, it's e 1st time my teacher has completely not believed me... even though i was telling the truth!"

2) ... "mum, girls can be really mean. i dunno why, but the boys just aren't really like that."

3) ... "he fell and hurt himself, so i took him to the office, even though the end-of-recess bell had already gone. it took 3 of us to get him there!"

4)... "oops, we forgot mothers' day!"

5)... "our treehouse opens in 7days!!!"

-she says she likes me. she says i'm not mean like the other boys.

-i'm so glad i dont do chinese.... have u seen how they have to do their spelling!

-she has a dirty habit. she picks her nose. then she doesnt wash her hands. she's very unhygienic.  she'll go straight and eat her lunch without 1st cleaning her hands you know...

-i dont wanna do any sports in the morning. i really dont like waking up so early! 

-i dont know if that's her mother or her helper...

-mum, can i tell u something?... u know, i feel so sorry for poor A. her mother will cane her 10x if she leaves her small bag behind. and poor thing... she's left it quite a few times already...

-i *have* to find that worksheet, else the teacher will REALLY scold us very loudly.

-my wobbly tooth feels kinda furry...

-mum, i preferred u with long hair u know... can u pls grow it again?

-suddenly, since going to school, the days seem to be going by so fast.... like it was just this morning a minute ago, and now it's already dinner!

-mum, u see those teenage boys over there... i really dont wanna grow big so fast!

dear Ky,

today u thrilled me no end! u came home with a wonderful cheezy grin across yr face... u just cdnt stop smiling. your face was all aglow... you looked so so so happy!

and why? i didnt even ask...

you quickly told me that in the hall today you told yrself over and over, "i'm going to do my best! i know i can do it! i'm gonna do it right and i'm gonna doit  well.... yes kynan, you can do it!"

u told me u spent e whole of hall-time saying this over-and-over to yrself. (it shd have been malay oral exam today~ yr 1st exam ever!... but in the end it turned out that u did english oral exam 1st, leaving no time for malay)... "and mum i did soooo well! i did the best i could and Ms O said it was the best she'd heard all day!...mum i'm sooooo happy!"

my dear, i was so pleased to hear u have such a positive experience for such a momentous 1st-time!  we'd prayed over it the night before, do u remember?... and we'd asked God to help u remember what u needed to know, and help u to express it clearly, calmly and with confidence.

and tonight u shared that today was a wonderful day!... and that the exam was the best bit!  

when i asked you why?...  this is what u said:

"because it was easy mum and it was fun!... and better yet, i didnt have to go to regular classes!"

when i asked u why u talked to yrself in the hall, u said that u didnt know why, but just that it's something you felt u needed to do. you felt then that u were gonna do yr best, and that's exactly how it happened...

that night we said a thank-you prayer, and asked for continued guidance for the remaining exams.  the last thing you said before u slept...

"i wish we had exams every day!!!" :b

yes my dear, i see the joy on your face and i am so happy for you.

may u continue to feel this way for the longest time....!      luv, mummy

"i want to hit my head on something hard.."

"mama, pls...i hv to hit my head on something hard... i cant take it!"

ky had been complaining in his sleep all night. like he was having constant nightmares. he was semi-awake evry few minutes but cdnt verbalise what e problem was... until just before 4am... "a very bad headache" he said.

from what e neurosurgeaon told me, i knew it must be a very bad one to wake him... so i grabbed e new meds. i managed to get e codeine into him just before e whole thing escalated.

it wasnt confined to e left side this time. but rather e whole head... and he was screaming and writhing and begging and repeatedly punching his forehead.  again he wanted to go to e tiled floor but i stopped him and covered the area with pillows.

it was only one round this time...1st time ever. so although it was a bad one, i'm glad it wasnt e usual 3 or 4 times cluster. all i can attribute this to is the codeine.  and altho it only kicked in after abt 40min of headpunching and screaming, i'd still follow e same next time.

as an aside, it makes me wonder what kind of damage he can inflict on his brain if he keeps this up longterm?

well because of e nite's 'happenings', he had to miss gym today, and there was no way i was gonna let him stay over w/o me for tnite's scout camp. 

i think of all this and i wonder why...?

and for his precious sanity, i wonder *when* this will all end...?

kynan: "mummy, how heavy is air?"

me: "err, go ask daddy." :)

kynan: "daddy, how heavy is air?.... does it weigh nothing?"

dh:  "err, no..... from here to outer space is the same as 10metres of water pressing down on u."

kynan: "aaah.... so that's why we can't fly up....the air pressing down on us is too heavy!"

***bravo to dh's scientific answer!... tho i admit i am still none the wiser :) ***

ky tonite-  "school is so so so fun mama, i wish i didnt have to have a break on saturdays! i wish i cd go to school that day also."

me- "don't worry my dear, u still have many more years of school to enjoy!"

ky- "oh ya!... but by then it will be more difficult ya? it's not gonna stay this easy rt?"

me- "you find it easy rt now?"

ky- "ya."

me- "well, that's good. yes it will get more difficult, but by then you'll also know more. and if any time u dont understand something, then u jus keep asking until u do. and if u still don't, then u just come and ask me...then we'll work it out together."

ky- "ya i know." 

me- "so what's so much fun abt school then?"

ky- "sitting cross-legged and having stories in the morning while we wait."

me- "the ones u have to bring in to read?"

ky- "no, they tell us a story, but not today."

me- "what kind of story? Bible stories?"

ky- "er, i dunno. i'll tell u another time.... i also like playing in Aunty C's office. there were 15 of us in there today, and you know it is just half the size of my bedroom and we played freeze."

me- "is that a boardgame?" (thinking it cdnt possibly be the other kind considering the space constraints!)

ky- "no mum. for real. we moved one step forward and one step back, then she shouted 'freeze' and we all had to keep still."

me- "she plays this game with such a big bunch of u kids in her office?"

ky- "ya, me and x,y,z went there today. but there's lots of bigger rooms un-used, i think they shd give her one of those."

me- "i think i agree!... she sounds like a truly wonderful woman!"

ky- "oh and mum, do u know what's the 3rd thing that's fun for me?"

me- "what's that my dear?"

ky- "going home!"

me- "oh yea? how come?"

ky- "cos then i get to rest and play!" :)

***the above are just a few reasons why ky is really enjoying school rt now.   oh, and he's just discovered a field behind a heavy gate, where they're allowed to kick about during recess.... and an excercise area where he can swing on the bars and do a few push-ups.... and the library...or the toys in Aunty C's office, ...or just messing about in the canteen. so many options... so little time!

****oh and they've just started a new book- "Sam, the flying man," he informs me... "but it's not very good", he says... "quite boring in fact!"  he app found 'mrs wishy-washy' a much better read!  :)

ah, i'm happy for him! and so glad it's all been delayed until now... a time when he's mature enough to enjoy it for what it is. i enjoyed my primary school yrs too! so i truly hope he continues to...

*****oh, and he has a project now::- to befriend 1 or 2 of the 'crying kids', share his 'special places'  with them, and see if things can take a turn for the better.  an uphill task perhaps, but let's see how it goes...

Wow, what a BUSY time it has been for ky...

...so much to see and learn and do and simply absorb...

my quiet moments spent lying beside him b4 he sleeps, have become something that are very precious to him. although he constantly chats abt everything in the day, this is a time when he gets the rest of it out of his system b4 sleep. it's quite pleasant for me too!... and i try to put aside thoughts of e full sink waiting for me... or the laundary that needs to be done... etc... but it takes a loooot of self-control!

tonight was all about how he loves to watch the sec school kids play soccer during recess... peeking through the fence with a few of his buddies. 

this led to him mentioning that 1 teenage girl stood watching with them... which in turn lead to talk abt e approriate/ inappropriate conversations of teenagers... which led to him telling me:  "pls dont put me in an all-girls sec school!" which got a confused response from me. huh???  (seems he'd heard dh talking abt that as an option for kay, and somehow thot it mt somehow be dh's preferred choice for him!)...

which led him to tell me he wanted to be in a mixed sec school... which got us on the subject of e pro's and con's of single-sex vs mixed schools. and the pros and cons of focusing on studies in a single-sex school, vs 'talent-spotting' in a mixed school, then day-dreaming abt girl-friends... which he found rather amusing!  and then brought him to the conclusion that: " ya, i think i'd prefer an all-boys sec school so i can do boy's sports and rough stuff. e girls wd just wanna sit down and share their 'fairy books'."  i commented that by then they'd more likely be looking at mags and checking out the latest fashions, make-up etc, and probably be making plans to go shopping together, & sipping iced-drinks in starbucks :))  for now though he's happy to be chit-chatting with them, and learning just how different they are to boys! :)

yesterday was abt which 3 kids are the quietest in class, and which 3 are the 'naughtiest'. ;) e girls are mostly e quieter ones, while the boys seem to be getting in more trouble....  then he startled me by asking whether i know that: "there are two types of nouns, proper and common"/ and in which groups "names and places and people and things and plants and animals fall".../ and can he teach me that "the clock on the wall is a 'neuter noun' which means blah blah blah ('neutral' i think... possibly the pronunciation of his chinese teacher that's not too clear ;)), and "that dogs and cats are common nouns with proper gender".  mmm i dont think i learnt such detailed grammar when i was young... but it's good that he's actually remembering some of it! which sure is a surprise to me! ... "but u know what i hate mama?... that she's doing nouns every day now... and it's the same stuff over and over!!! it's really getting boring!"....he then ended with a humorous narration of 'mrs wishy washy'.

how nice it was for me to finally be the one lolling in bed listening to a story being told!... :)

the day before, was abt the games he'd played in p.e, then who'd pulled who's hair, who'd broken someone's special 'xyz', and who the special someone was, that he gave his extra marshmallow to. :b  and he was happy to mention that he and 2 others were asked to help his teacher carry some big boxes to another room, and how he thought he cd do a better job at keeping his class quiet in the teacher's absence.  :)

this is clearly such a brand new world to him, with so much to do and see and think about.  i'm so thankful that he's taking it in his stride.

it's been a week and what a turn-around from just 10days ago. back then kynan knew he had to go to school, but "still wished he didnt have to!" another day he asked me seriously, "mama, if school is 6hrs, do u think we only do lessons for like 2hrs of it?"  :b

things improved though.... the day b4 school started he was really chuffed about all the goodies we'd bought together for his lunchbox. and of course the fully-stocked art folder was just too exciting to bare!

then after a few days of school, this is what he said:

-my bag's so heavy... i think it's heavier than yours!

-school was ok. i made some friends.

-i met the principal today.

-my bag's lighter now. we handed the books to e teacher. i'll show u what others i nd to take tmw.

-the groundfloor boys' toilets are sooooo smelly! there's no soap and no toilet paper.  the upstairs ones are not so bad.

-all we do all day is practice lining up and we take sooo many toilet breaks.

-kayla, you did more work than me!

-we didnt do any art today. not p/e either.

-i'm so tired of sitting cross-legged on the floor, waiting for school to begin! it's soooo uncomfortable!

-the day was really long today.... i'm sooooo tired!

-i dont wanna get up....pleeez....it feels like i've hardly slept!

-my bag's so light today. i think i can carry it all the way there in one hand!

-i'm so happy now! i'm making more friends.

-T--- plays 'tya tya' games with me. it's quite funny.

-that's ------. she's very sweet.

-remember that girl from swimming.... she told me to 'shut-up' when i talked to her.

-i wish i cd sit next to Z---. i wish the teacher didnt choose.

-i'm ready to start some work now.

-there's soooo much noise. the other kids are always talking and the teachers keep shouting.

-the chinese teacher yelled so loud it made my feet jump off the floor. i was soooo shocked! now i've had such a bad headache since then.

-you came just at the right time! did u see me?

-i made something for u today. oh, but i cant show to u. the teacher has it. i hope/ i mean, i think we'll be able to give it to u someday.

-my teacher's shouting less now. i hope she starts sending the noisy kids out soon.

-[about friends] ...they wear white shoes / x--- only has half an ear/  t--- speaks into his neck so the teacher cant understand him/ c---- starts crying everytime the teacher tells her what work to do/ a----nearly got left behind in class cos she was too slow to pack up for recess/ ...and one girl lost her class in school, so our teacher helped her find her way back.

-the writing we're doing is like kindergarten work.

-the kids race through their work. it looks very messy.

-we've not done any p/e yet. we keep doing writing in that time. or the teacher wd collect books and money.

-recess is like half-an-hour, but by the time the whole class has been to the toilet, it feels like just 10minutes!

-mum, e canteen noodles taste like poison!  the drinks taste artificial, i dont like them.

-please can u pack my food for me every day?

-mum, pls dont pack my food in a big lunch-box. all the teachers come and look to see what i've got. it's embarrassing...

-how do u know that? have u been spying on me while i was in school?!

-school went by so fast today... like it was only 2hrs!

-i wasnt twirling my bag-straps today... how come u still saw me?

-i'm sooooo happy to be doing some writing at last!!!!

e kids slept at ard 3/ 3.30am on new year's day, so it was important to me that ky especially, caught up on some sleep the next day. (it was precisely this time last year that his cluster migraines started, so i was very apprehensive, esp with school e following day.)  so that nite we had dinner half-hour earlier at 5.30pm, bathtime at 6.30, boardgames at 7, stories at 8, followed by prayers, and lights-out by 8.30. my job done! :)

kay slept soundly til 10am the next day. ky til 10.30! what a late breakfast they both had!...   i'd planned to be at school by 1pm (15min b4 school officially started). i'd wanted to drop by granny's to wish him well, but as it turned out, she wasn't in, which turned out to be a blessing in disguise.... so suddenly we had almost an hour to spare... or so i thought! 

with the extra time we had, we went to a playgrd nearby and let them have some fun.  (i wasnt sure whether parents usually let their kids climb ard in their spanking new uniforms? but then i thot "oh well, i did when i was a kid, even in our own school playgrd- i swung on e monkey-bars daily." so i was comforted knowing that he wasnt missing out on anything :) 

but just as we were enjoying our last bit of free time together, i noticed that e trickle of accompanied p1 kids walking past us, was now becoming a steady stream... "boy," i mentioned to kynan, "these parents sure are going in early today... perhaps i shd be doing the same?..."  "nah," he grinned.... but God agreed and cut short our escapade with a few drops of rain...so we hurried on our way... arriving at the school at 12noon...1 full hour earlier than i'd planned.

i saw a mass of p1 kids and parents, and realised that we were probably one of the last to arrive (and i'd still wanted to speak to his teacher abt his asthma meds and dislexia issues!) what was i thinking... for one, it became clear that i was way too laidback compared with the rest of e singaporeans there! well, i managed to see the teacher and she assured me ky still had 15min to spare. so he had time to wolf down some of my "specially-prepared organic noodles with chicken-stock and bacon" :)  (it's not often i do home-cooked lunch btw :))  when he was done i cdnt even give him a hug as the place was too packed, so i had to make do with a quick kiss on the top of his head.  and that's when i felt my eyes start to burn... but i blinked away the tears that wanted to come, and instead shepherded him to the cordoned-off area where the rest of his class and school-mates were lining up. due to his height he was put at the back of the line...so he never saw me after that.

but my job was not yet done there.... i had to hang ard for another hour b4 going for another principal's address, along with a talk by a rather amusing and gregarious teacher, abt parents' being good moral examples to their kids.  kay was surprisingly patient, thank goodness! after the talk we headed downstairs to watch from outside some barricades as e p2 buddies accompanied our kiddoes to buy their food at the canteen. it somehow reminded me of a cattlemarket. kay and i finally left at ard 3.30pm. as we had to be back by 6, we decided not to go home. all the waiting around had exhausted both of us.... so we plodded to junction 8 for our very late lunch (ya, poor kay had not even eaten yet! thank goodness for her late breakfast...)  

it struck me how afwully quiet it was as we walked. uusally ky wd be talking, but this time, unless i initiated converstaion with kay, it was just silent. a couple of times i wanted to tunr back to check that ky was crossing the road with us, only to catch myself short. how odd it's going to be...

kay played on her own at the playgrd. i felt sad that she didnt have a friend. she kept calling out to me to look at what she was doing... which is something she never usually does.  she wdnt eat her lunch either, but i didnt have a heart to make a fuss. i remembered that ky needed a toothmug for school, so we went upstairs at j8 to go and find one. kay helped me look for a "non-baby" one :)  it was hard when most of them were either barbie princess or dora.  but finally we chanced upon the only "boyish one"- sporting super-heroes of course!

she knew that kynan had got some lunch money today and noticed he'd bought a milo during recess.... so she wanted to go to the "treat shop" to spend the 50c that she'd brought along out of her wallet.  it's hard to find anything at that price nowadays!...but eventually we did.  (some very healthy crackly space-dust ;))  she'd been excited the whole day to go and choose some vcd's for kynan from the library, so that was our final stop.  we stuffed her and my bags full of cd's and books and headed back to meet the little boy.

we were told to be there by 6pm but i was even earlier this time :) 5.40... alas, they only were released ard 6.30!   i'm so not used to all this waiting around!... our own h/s classes have always started and ended punctually, and time is utilised efficiently. but from my experience that day, and even ky's feedback, that is soooo not the case in school...

kynan's feedback:

-we spent all day learning how to line up!

-the best way to do it is to look at the back of the person's head in front of you.

-we watched a video abt 2 kids going to school.

-i got to meet the principal.

-4 kids in my class have had hand-foot-and-mouth. the principal asked and they put their hands up.

-my teacher got very angry today. e kids kept talking all e time.... but not me.

-there's 29 children in my class, including me. another 1 comes on monday, and that will make 30.

-there's no soap in any of the toilets downstairs.

-i went to the toilet soooo many times, cos the teacher said it's imporatnt that we all go.

-e boys' toilets smell reeeally bad, especially when i bent down.

-can you show me where to buy pizza...

-the juices here are 50c for a cup. much cheaper than outside. and i paid 80c for a milo. but the juices are artificial. they're not very nice. can you pack drinks for me each day?

-we played a running game and i fell down and grazed my knee. it's really sore. many lkids fell down, but too many so e teacher didnt bother to check on them all.

-some of the kids were crying. one girl cried at the beginning. then she refused to sit down the whole day!

-i didnt have to hold hands with anyone today.  my partner only comes on monday.  we all have to hold hand when we line up and walk.

-i''m tall so i have to be at the back of the line. the shorter kids go in front.  we have to stick with our partners til the end of the year.

-you know i've got a friend Zooraimi...well remember the other one i talked to last time... his name is Titus.

-i dont have all my books in my bag anymore. the teacher's keeping some of them.

-i need to take x,y,z books on monday. i'll show u which ones.

-e teacher has put some important stuff in my diary here for you.

-this is my timetable and this is what i wrote... it's my name...

-we have to wear our pe kit on monday.

-i liked school. it was easy. all i learned all day was to line up!  :)

***success? ....success    ..... for now.... :)

dh met us at the school and drove us home. we were all very tired, esp me. ky was chirpy though, and kay was excited to ask if he'd made any friends and who they were. she proudly showed him what she'd been up to, with little mazes and dot-to-dots in her little notebook.

things went like clockwork.  we got home ard 6.45pm. they went straight to bath at 7, dinner at 7.30, stories and prayers at 8, and lights-out by 8.30.  surprisingly, my night-time schedule is even tighter since school began. i'm happy abt this... and happy too that the kids can lie-in in the mornings and we can all have a slow and relaxed start, and some time to just enjoy each other's company.  dh says he likes it this way too...

am presently happy, contented, relaxed, relieved, tired.... and quietly thankful that my boy is in good spirits... thank God!

on fri we went to a birthday party and stayed late swimming. then we popped round to a sick friend and had dinner along e way. by the time we got home it must have been close to 10pm. (oh and the kids had wanted to sleep at granny's that night too!)

e next morning i woke with a start at 8.25am, dh telling me in jibberish that "u hv to be at kynan's thing today." me, "er what?" eyes still half-closed, trying to turn and sleep again. "u know, kynan's thing. kynan's thing at school." me, bolt upright, eyes wide, suddenly dawning, "oh my word, it's today? today's saturday? wot's e time? wot time do we have to be there?" i bolt out e door to my diary b4 he has chance to answer. "principle's address 9pm. phew, we still hv time. "oh no, 8.30am collect name tags!"

from then on it was all go...!  i whisked e kids out of bed, dressed us all, made sandwiches, sorted an asthmatic kynan with a few puffs, and had dh run us down. ky was last in line and sat sweetly in place. no time for goodbyes and fare-thee-well's...i hurriedly introduced myself and explained his wheeze to e new teacher, then i half-dragged kay up the stairs, with the principle's address just beginning as we found our seats. :) phew, i breathed a huge sigh of relief!

dh arrived near the end of the speech and helped relieve a very bored little girl for a while.

afterwards, as i headed off past the library, i saw kynan sitting intently listening to a story, and later, holding a little girl's hand at the front of the line. (he asked later if i noticed what a very sweet face she had, esp the way her hair framed her face and hung just so... and did i notice she was wearing a nice pink dress. he pointed out that they were the only 2 in the class to have brought along their waterbottles that day.... (isnt it amazing what kids notice!)

while i spent an hour filling in forms, he had a tour of e school facilities... ( i had the short end of the straw for sure!)

this is what he said of it:   "my teacher took us to the dental clinic.  there's 2 dental staff there to do the kids teeth, and 1 nurse who just goes ard e school all day checking all e kids to see if they're healthy, like not too fat or too skinny."  he says he also saw e computer room, the science lab, and had a show put on for them by the band.  "they gave me a form to fill in so i can join e band. they let us try some of the instruments, and the band-kids gave us these stickers,"  he added with wide eyes.

friends?

-the 1st thing he said wen he saw me, "mum, the naughty boy is *not* in my class!"  (referring to a mischievous little monkey from our neighbourhood ;-))  "i waved at him to say hi"... (so they mt well become good friends! :))

-"i made one friend. i dont know his name, it's something chinese. he sat next to me in line at the beginning.... and he has a friend called Zooryhmee. u know, like zoo-ryhme-me. that's what i thought when i heard him say it, so it's easy to remember.  ("is he malay?")  "no" ("so do u think he's chinese?")  "no he's english"...   "and there's one little boy who had a lot of white stuff on his shoulder, and a big sore covered with white stuff on his neck. ("excema?", i ventured, suggesting he try befriend him perhaps)  "ya mb. we didnt know his name cos he wdnt say.  and another boy lost the namecard in his nametag, but he *did* know his name!"

what else?

-"i followed nicely in a line. e teacher told us we had to. but nearly all the other kids didnt. they just messed around going all over the place."

-"e teacher said we will get a library card and we can take out 4books. her name is Ms W_." ("Ms O_?" i query...)  "no, Ms W_.  she says her grandmother and grandfather were Mr and Mrs W_. so it's definitely that."

-"e book the teacher read us in the library was this biiiiiig!"

-"there are 22 children in our class, and 4 of them were not there." ("not 30?") "no, not 30. only 22"

-"e teacher asked if we'd all had breakfast. 1 child hadnt." ("what did she say then?") "that's too bad!..."

-"there's lots of stairs! did u see?!"

-"it's a reeeeeeallly big school!"

did u have fun?

-"ya, but i still wish i didnt have to go to school!"

and what tickeld me?

-a library book sale, $1 each, a bargain! ... e P5& P6 kids did brisk business fundraising.

-"be prepared for camps in P1." woa hooray!

-"no reason why P1&P2's shdnt be doing weekly cca's" . whoopdeedoo!

-"new guitar club starting this year, open to P1's."

-"band open to P1's.... start them early so they can become proficient."

-"gymnastics classes for P1 kids, run by a private coach" (beginners though, but great just for fun!).

-"we share resources/ facilities with e affiliated sec school, incl basketball courts etc"

-"no examinations in P1"

-"we are developing a programme to stretch our top performers."

-"we are a family. let's behave like one!"

any shocks to the system?

-the price of all e P1 books for e year!

-the total no of P1 books needed (esp all e workbooks!!!!!!!!!!!!)

-e price of uniforms!

-e price of p/e kit!

-kynan holding hands with strange girls!

***what an incredible new journey we are abt to begin!***

"Mama, put your arm around me again..." 

...a quiet voice came from a little boy during storytime, as i moved to turn a page.  a simple request, but it meant a thousand words to me, and coming from someone who never asks, but certainly needs...

my dear Ky, you're such a strong, well-rounded little boy. and it's probably because of yr physical strength that i have failed to recognise your ongoing need for such gentle touch. i can understand how warm and reassuring it must be for u, especially after so long being on your own, and having me constantly encourage u to fend for yourself.  

pls forgive me.  i have not given u the care i should have.

i'm so aloof and distracted at times, wanting to get abc done, and forgetting there's a little soul in there, waiting and wanting to be nurtured.   it seems too often that such moments just pass me by...   yr still a child like i once was, yearning for a soft gentle hand in a quiet moment. it's a learning journey for me. pls help mama remember. and i'll kp trying

While walking along the road today... on the way from playgroup to chinese class...and stopping off home along the way to feed the cat...

Ky- "Mama, i wish i could be 6 forever!"

Me- "Why?"

Ky- "Then i wdnt have to go to school, or work... and life could just be this way forever..."

Me- "Aaaah..."

kynan:  "Mum, i think i wanna be a taxi driver when i grow up."

me: "Why's that?"

ky: "They earn lots of money!"

me: "but they have to work very hard."

ky: "no it's not hard work. all they have to do is drive around."

me: "i know, but driving around looking for customers can be tiring. besides, there are plenty of 'easier' jobs around that probably pay better? for mama, that wd be teaching. you can sit or stand in the day. and it can be quite fun getting to know all the kids."

ky: "oh ya, like a swim teacher. that mt be nice... or a gym coach! i wonder how much a gym coach earns? do u think it's enough to survive on mama?"

me: "i dont know kynan, perhaps u shd ask yr gym coach?"  :)