Posted in Ponderings

I'm still milking this virus or whatever it is; there's a 1/2 cap lysine here from when I was splitting this for someone so I may take that tonight. I have not taken my vits yet; lately I've been putting it off until evening which I don't really like. It's so much nicer to have them all down in the AM, but there's just too much to do then & I don't get to it. I think I'd be able to get over it quicker if I could sleep at night, but there's just too much nursing going on these days!

My day starts out with supplement mixing for 4 kiddos, while hopefully my Ladybugs (twin baby girls) stay quiet for me (which doesn't always happen!). Then it's breakfast making & administering all the supplements, cleaning up, trying to get something into myself, computer time, & onto homeschooling. Needless to say, I'm quite tired by then, but I'm tired just getting out of bed these days!

One thing the virus has done for me is curbed my hunger. I have to still make sure I eat enough for nursing two, but it's been nice to not be SO hungry, SO much of the time. It's also made me extremely thirsty. It might be the extra nursing going on these days (teething), the mouth breathing from being so stuffed up, the dry heat here, or all of the above. But it's made it a lot easier to get that water drinking done.

I'm extremely tired & when this tired it's tough to keep the head above water, so I'm trying to keep that in perspective right now. These difficult periods tend to pass, although the autism thing here doesn't pass, but there are times I'm physically & emotionally stronger to deal with it. Right now I'm neither too well, so I guess the best thing I can do is pull closer to the Lord & do the best I can health wise, even if it's just the bare minimum right now. I have a book coming in that's been highly recommended to me, so I will blog on that when it comes.

This morning I wondered why the Lord wants me to go it alone most of the time. It really bothered me at one point because there's not really anyone I can lean on. I've been reading a great book with my children & they've been discussing how we can't see the big picture, only God can. So we can only do the best we can in our present situation, day by day, minute by minute, & leave Him to work out the plan. I don't know what's coming in the future, how I affect others in my behavior during these difficult times, & how He will continue to use me if I am listening, staying close & allowing Him to grow me. So I have to keep that in mind as I press through, with His strength, not mine (because I don't have it). I also believe He wants me relying on Him, not others, & He will bring in others when He feels it's time to provide.

2 Corinthians 12:9 My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Philippians 4:13  I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.