Dec. 19, 2007 - 10 Things Families with Food Allergies Want You to Know!

Severe food allergies require a dramatic change in lifestyle, but unless these allergies have affected your immediate family, you have no idea of what goes on behind the scenes to keep these children safe. This holiday season, we'd love to spend time with you, so we need your help. With no rule book or etiquette guide, we don't always know how to ask for that help. If you really want to know what will make our season bright, here are:

10 Things Families with Allergies Would Like You to Know!.

1. Be careful with your kisses! If you've just eaten anything that our child is allergic to, we'd prefer that you kiss her on the top of her head or give her a hug or an "air kiss". This is what we do! Sound extreme? We know, and that's why we feel so funny about asking you. But trust us when we tell you that the only thing worse than seeing your child suffer an allergic reaction is knowing that you have caused that reaction.
   
   
2. We'd love you to wash your hands. We don't want to ask. But we don't know what you've eaten or touched and we really don't want to risk it. We know it sounds crazy but our child has reacted to "just touching" things he is allergic to.
   
   
3. Use care with your baby's foods and bottles. We love your children and know that they need to eat a variety of foods. However, those foods and the milk or soy formula that they drink can cause allergic reactions in our child. Please don't allow your toddler to walk around with a bag of cookies, goldfish or cereal while we're together. One dropped piece could cause a problem for a child with severe food allergies.
   
   
4. Please, watch your pets and their food. Many pet foods and treats contain allergens including milk, fish and peanut, and an innocent lick can cause a reaction in allergic children.
   
   
5. Please don't feed our child. Raising a child with food allergies is a whole new way of life. Allergy Moms and Dads can't possibly expect others to keep in mind all of the nuances of where and how allergens hide. If you'd like to help, hold the baby so mom can get a bite to eat, build a block tower, read a book, or follow our toddler around for awhile to give his mom a break. There are many ways to show love that do not involve food!
   
   
6. Talk to us first! If you are hosting a child who has food allergies, talk to the parents in advance. If you are setting out foods that may be safe, save all of the wrappers. Better yet, let the allergy mom or dad help you put the safe chips out. (Remember that if you touch the cookies with nuts or the shrimp, and then touch the chips, they are now cross-contaminated.)
   
   
7. Try not to fuss over what our child is eating. If he or she needs to have a different menu of safe foods, please don't call attention to it. Don't make food allergies a big topic of conversation. For example, "Well what can he eat?"
   
   
8. We'd be grateful if you'd confine the food to one or two areas. For example, don't allow food into the family room, or the basement if that is where the children will be playing. That way, all the children will be safe and your house will be cleaner too!
   
   
9. We'd love it if you'd ask your children to wash their hands. We know that your kids are able to eat whatever they like, but children are notoriously messy eaters. You'd be doing us a great favor if you'd encourage them to wash their hands when they're done eating. We know it's not our place to ask this of your children but we worry that our kids are not safe if they share toys or touch each other with food residue.
   
   
10. Ask for suggestions because we want to make this work for everyone. If you want to bring something to a home with a food allergic child, talk to the parents in advance for specific suggestions. Your homemade casserole or brownies may not be suitable but a bottle of wine, some fresh ground coffee, a fun board game, whole fruit, or some beautiful disposable hand towels for the powder room might be appreciated.
    
    

© 2007 AllergyMoms LLC

WOW, I couldn't have said it better myself!!  I would add, though, that this goes for all get togethers, not just at the holidays.  MOPS, church functions, parents in church or other public places in general, like libraries, play gyms, etc (trying to keep their own kids quiet with food can risk another child's life).  Keeping food in 'food designated areas' is SOOOO considerate to those of us dealing with these issues!!  For more great food-allergy-related info, check out the AllergyMoms website!

 ~Lindsay

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Nov. 20, 2007 - Celebrating with Food....Or Not...

This holiday season is always filled with gatherings surrounded by food.  Last year we had our own little thanksgiving feast at our house, and I have to admit it was nice.  (we didn't yet know the extent of N's condition).  I cooked the meal for the first time, turkey and all.  And it was really delicious, if I do say so myself.  But all the work and timing and everything involved with cooking a meal like that....it's nothing compared to the stress of dealing with severe, life-threatening food allergies.  Having a child like N puts a whole new perspective on celebrating everything with food.

This year, DH will be staying home with N on Turkey Day, while I take the rest of our clan and go to a family Thanksgiving dinner.  N won't miss it, and DH is really looking forward to the fun time alone with him (plus I'll bring home plenty of left-overs for him!).  It's difficult for others to understand, but for us it's a choice between N's health and safety, and other peoples' feelings and opinions.  N wins, hands down.  In our own home, we keep as much of the allergenic foods out of the house as possible, and N knows what he can eat.  But even here, accidents happen, and he reacts.  That happens here, in the safest environment possible!  So taking him somewhere that he'll be surrounded by food he's allergic to; that's being cooked in the same area as him; that others are getting on their hands and faces and possibly then touching him; that may be dropped on the floor; may be smudged on a chair or a counter or a door handle....  The possibilities of exposure are endless!!

I don't like taking him places that I know we're going to have to give him Benadryl and put steroids on his skin after we take him there.  Gatherings, museums, the zoo, church.  It's a very uneasy feeling knowing you have to choose between making others happy and comfortable and drugging your kid, or keeping your kid safe and people thinking you're crazy and over-protective.

I am a member of a great food-allergy support group.  They sent out a newsletter with non-food suggestions for Thanksgiving.  They are great suggestions, which all the parents of food-allergic children, I'm sure, love and go for.  But with a holiday like thanksgiving, it's hard to convince people to let the food take the back burner!  Anyway, I do get visitors often that are dealing with food allergies, so click here for 12 food-free Thanksgiving crafts and activities; strategies for making dinner and school safe; and allergen-free recipes for pumpkin pie and stuffing!

~Lindsay

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Aug. 19, 2007 - Food Allergies

I am always thinking about food allergies.

But this weekend has been especially significant, being it was our anniversary. Our anniversary last year, I spent about 10 hours in the hospital with our youngest - his first anaphylactic reaction to a food. Thankfully this year, we did not have a repeat performance!

But I got to thinking how his health challenges, specifically food allergies, have changed our lives. We’ve dealt with food allergies since my oldest - now 6 ½ years old - was about 18 months. I knew he had food allergies before he was that old. In fact, I suspected wheat allergy when he started eating Cheerios - America’s first food - at around 6 months but I gave in to everyone poo-pooing me as an overprotective mother. I continued to let him have wheat, soy, diary, etc until finally his eczema, constant diarrhea and his disposition brought me to a nutritionist who started guiding me through eliminating those highly allergenic foods. And his skin cleared and he became the happy boy we know and love today.

But even then, I didn’t take his allergies seriously enough. I didn’t know any better. Even our pediatrician gave me ‘the look’ when I mentioned his allergies. You know ‘the look’. The ‘you’re a little wacko, but you’re MOM so I won’t say it out loud, I’ll just look at you in a way that lets you know I don’t believe the whole food allergy scheme as much as you do’ Look. I gave in to pressure from family to allow snacks, candies, treats, fast food, etc much more often than I should have. Wondering now - now that I know the research and statistics I didn’t know then - if he’d have outgrown his allergies more substantially at this age if I had been more strict with his avoidance.

But our little N has taken that to a new level. Because his allergies don’t just cause eczema or diarrhea. They are life threatening. We can have everything turned upside down and be facing a life-and-death situation in a matter of seconds. My husband and I have seen that reality first hand. We keep the stuff (nuts, most diary, eggs, fish/shellfish, most wheat) out of the house. We never eat at restaurants anymore. We never even have take-out with the kids anymore. We load the diaper bag with Benadryl and his EpiPens EVERY TIME we leave the house. We live with a constant reminder of what could be. But others don’t. Others for the most part, still don’t get it. They don’t live with it, they don’t bother to inform themselves, and so we - mostly me - are left looking overprotective and over-reactive to their ignorance.

My dear, dear friend Nichole tells me how much Nolan has changed her life. That she’s so much more aware of allergies, especially foods. Always asking parents when she’s caring for other children (she volunteers at the YMCA), always thinking about cross-contamination, being careful not to bring things to our home that Nolan is allergic to. It is so refreshing. It’s hard enough to keep it out of the house ourselves, then to have to be police for everyone else that comes over...it’s not a fun position to be in. But it’s that or N’s life, so I put him before what everyone else thinks of me. LOL

Here is a YouTube video that I think is great. These kids are so cute, and they are old enough to know that their allergies are serious. Personally, I don’t think there will be a cure for food allergies, though I suppose there is always hope. It is going to boil down to better public awareness and getting the most common and severe allergens out of public areas (not necessarily restaurants, but libraries, schools, etc). Please watch this video, and make yourself more aware of allergic kids!

~Lindsay

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Jul. 31, 2007 - What a day...

Well, we're moving into the world of asthma with our youngest.  He's had a few episodes up to this point, but yesterday was pretty scary. 

Sunday night he started coughing.  An asthmatic cough is very distinct sounding, it sounds 'tight'.  It started right around bath-time, and he woke up a few times coughing, but no wheezing and really slept okay that night.  But yesterday morning he woke up wheezing and retracting (when you can see the accessory muscles of the chest, throat and abdomen working hard to help the lungs pull in air).  So I gave him a nebulizer treatment, which usually does the trick.  But it only helped a little, and within a half hour or so he was back to the same place. 

I debated - do I call the pediatrician, or the allergist?  Part of the difference is the cost, which maybe that sounds like I'm a bad mom for even considering it, but the thought was there.  We don't have much in the way of insurance - everything is out-of-pocket.  Anyway, I decided to go with the allergist.  I spoke with the nurse, and she said they'd call me back.  The doctor called back, and asked a bunch of questions.  He is so very thorough.  Then he could hear Nolan coughing in the background and said, "He needs to be seen.  Leave NOW." 

Wow, I was a little rattled.  I don't have a whole lot of experience, or research, with asthma.  It's something I really need to start reading up on.  Anyway, the drive to the office is about 35 or 40 minutes and he was coughing and gasping for air the whole way, progressively getting worse.  It was scary.  They got us right in and the doctor was very thorough in his evaluation, listening to his lungs for what seemed like a long time to me.  He explained what the treatment plan would be (I'll get there in a minute), and then said he didn't want us leaving without giving Nolan another neb. treatment there in the office.  He evaluated Nolan after the treatment, seeing that it helped, but not much.

Here's the scary part - he told me if I had waited much longer, we would have ended up in the ER.  He explained that while Nolan was getting the oxygen he needed, his body was working *so hard* to do it, that eventually it would have tired out and then we would have been in trouble.  He said we might still end up in the ER that evening, but hopefully we had started the treatment plan early enough that we would be able to turn the corner before he tired out. 

Not something I liked hearing, but I was glad I had called the right doctor.  Now, here's the plan he gave us:  Prednisone 2x a day, Pulmicort treatments (inhaled steroid) 2x a day, Xopenex treatments (inhaled fast-acting bronchodilator) every 2 hours.  If Nolan hadn't turned the corner by 8 pm last night, we were to call our doctor and most likely be making a trip to the ER.  *thankfullly* he did start improving about 7 pm last night.

Not to say we didn't have a rough night though.  He still wasn't breathing 'well', and all those medicines put together makes a child very restless and hyper.  He didn't sleep much, even though he was so tired.  So, I'm pretty tired today - after all the driving, treatments, carrying him more than an average day (all this at 7 1/2 mos pregnant!), and then only getting a few hours of restless sleep last night...  I'm sure I'm not as tired as Nolan, though.  He's running like a tank today, but it's the meds that are keeping him going.  I'm sure his little body and mind are exhausted.

So how was YOUR monday?   

~Lindsay

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Jul. 12, 2007 - Eczema Scrapbook

Okay, so after the enouragement of fellow bloggers and friends, I have been working on my scrapbook of Nolan's journey last year.

I have the pictures done, just need to add the journaling.  But I also need to do the front page - a title page of sorts.  I'm not really sure what picture to put there...a newborn pic? - it's not really a 'baby book'...a bad eczema pic?...a pic from after National Jewish?...a pic from during National Jewish?...no pic at all?

And then the title for that page/for the book...I'm drawing a blank for that, too.  My Journey with Eczema?  But what about the food allergies?  ...My First 14 Months?   I just don't know.  I'd like to think of a good quote or scripture to put there, possibly (no Calvinism, please!!  )

Well, any suggestions or thoughts are much appreciated! 

~Lindsay

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