Sep. 11, 2008 - child directed learning
I just completed reading HOME SCHOOL BURNOUT by Raymond S. Moore and Dorothy N. Moore. I'm casually flipping back through the book to reiterate some of the information that was given. First of all let me say that my desire is for my children to WANT to learn and I'm all for them pursuing their interests. With that said, I want to admit that I'm not sure how to allow this to happen. For one thing, their interests don't seem to me to be that worthwhile or educational. All that they really seem to care about are webkinz and TV. These things are not bad things in and of themselves, they're just not meaningful. While reading the HOME SCHOOL BURNOUT book, I couldn't help but wonder where these people come from (I'm struggling here trying to verbalize my thoughts and confusion). OK, let me try it this way, like I said, I'm all for my kids learning on their own. That's what they need to do. But HOW do I let them go? HOW do we get away from books/curriculum and still maintain education?
A couple of quotes from the book stood out to me:"Our attitudes and general conduct had a greater bearing on our children's development than their knowledge of subject matter", and this one, "Spend more of your mental effort on studying and exploiting your children's motivation instead of always confronting them with books". This sounds really good and I'm sure it's true, but again I ask, "HOW"? I've been homeschooling for seven years now. You would think that I would have a grip on things and stop doubting myself. But obviously something still is not completely right, or I wouldn't be having these doubts.
Today my DS is sick. We started out trying to go ahead with a regular day, but it wasn't working out. So I finally told him to turn off the computer math and go to bed. His sister asked if she could take him his laptop so he wouldn't be bored, and I said that would be OK. So now he has his laptop, and I thought this might be a good time to observe his interests. At first I was thrilled to notice that he was back doing his math! This got my hopes up that perhaps he really does WANT to learn. Well, after he did a few problems he quit that again and asked if he could sign up on the LEGOS website so he could play games. He also asked if he could go on Ebay. I said yes to both and inwardly felt disappointed. Do you see what I mean about his "interests"? If I don't tell my kids what to learn, all they will do during the day is play. How can that be beneficial?
I truly want what is best for my kids. I want them to WANT TO LEARN, but right now I'm not seeing that. I can't help but wonder if it's my fault because I didn't start out with the "child directed learning" method. I just don't know. I would LOVE your insights, and forgive me for presenting to you yet another one of my dilemmas. Do you still second-guess yourself, or is it just me?
Blessings to all.
Comments
Sep. 11, 2008 - my take on things
Posted by Potpourri of Praise...Laura A.
Let me start by saying...that while I agree with their theory in general, there ARE certain things children have to learn at certain ages (more or less) in order for us to hit the mark according to our state standards/tests..... Do I back off and let my DD pursue interests? Of course, but we still have to get some things done. Just because writing imaginative stories strikes her fancy for example, we cannot let that be the primary goal every day and let math, history, ...go by the wayside. So, I let her have days or parts of days where we "chase a rabbit trail" but then we still do cover the essentials the next day. But, for instance, if she wants to do a creative writing project, I do let her substitute that for our writing that day. However, that does not mean she can skip learning to write a "how to" paragraph or a personal letter all the time by saying she wants to do a 'creative' project instead.
The ideas you mentioned sound a lot like Montessori or even The Country Day School (in our area). And it also reminds me of some elements of the "unschooling" movement. These have a lot to offer, but since our kids have to be tested beginning in fourth grade, it does benefit them to at least introduce them to the testing format/material covered on the test. (Testing is another debate altogether...but at this point, let's just assume that we are going to do it...because we have to.) Testing should not drive what we cover with our children, but I don't think most kids are going to have a natural interest in standardized tests:) So we do have to teach them certain test taking skills so the test results will be helpful to us as parents.
Do I question my choices as a homeschool mom and as a parent? YES!!!!! sometimes DAILY!?!?!?!?!? Every book I read or every different curriculum I see makes me wonder...did I miss something??? Am I doing the best for my child??? And, I was a classroom teacher for years...so it's not like this is all new to me. The problem is there are SO many good methods/approaches out there that you cannot use them all...you have to make some choices. And, if your child becomes frustrated or is not progressing (or in our case, we saw SAT results that made us re-evaluate our choice of one subject area to address our DD's need for more practice of new concepts), then make a change.
I could go on and on, but I hope you understand that most everyone I know questions things in educating their children. God will give you wisdom to know how to teach each of them.
PS--I hope your DS is feeling better soon.
Sep. 11, 2008 - Well...
Posted by ohiohol
We can get all twisted up in philosophy, can't we? To keep both me and the kids sane, there is a certain minimum school they must do and then there is a great deal of the day that they can structure. I try to get us out of the house to a lot of fun and educational places. That can spark stuff down the line. And I love www.bravewriter.com for exploration of a writing lifestyle, not just a writing program. But, yeah, we've got some Lego fiends here...consumes a lot of their free time and thought.
Blessings, Holly
Sep. 12, 2008 - <em>Untitled Comment</em>
Posted by blessedwith2angels
Everyone doubts themself with their schooling sometimes. (Although some people might not want to admit it.)
I am trying to do more studying on subjects which interest my kids, but I feel if I didn't make them do some of the subjects they don't like, then they would never to choose to do them! I mean, my dd would love to spend all her time on the computer if I'd let her!
I am trying to do more hands on educational activities. That has really captured my son's interest.
Pam
p.s. Hope your ds feels better soon!
Edited by blessedwith2angels on Sep. 12, 2008 at 12:48 PM
Sep. 15, 2008 - Thanks
Posted by dcellis
I appreciate all the comments. I am really thankful for this blog site where we can all encourage one another and share ideas. You ladies are a blessing!
Sep. 18, 2008 - Oh, If Only There Was a Magic Key!
Posted by deovolente
I agree with your conclusions. As I look through the Bible and see God's methods of teaching/dealing with His people, some of them are pretty harsh and do not involve the person's desire to do whatever it is (Jonah, the Israelites much of the time, etc.). But then we see those who love the law of God, although they love it imperfectly (David, Samuel, Paul, etc.).
And so I think the real "goal" is to help develop that love of learning. But sometimes that's going to involve pain. You know how you have to learn the rules to anything before you can enjoy it properly...the rules to a card game, the rules of typing before you can effectively write something on the computer, the rules of a language before you can converse with someone in that language...
As parents, I think it is our job to make sure the kids do the work that will ensure they learn the rules, whether or not they like it.
HOWEVER, I think that OUR attitude as we do these things is key in this, and I would love insight into that! How do I teach something that I think is boring without conveying that, yes, this is boring but necessary? I know I don't have to entertain at every venture, but if I am grumbling and complaining...well, you know.
I think you are thinking through some good things. Doesn't it feel good to do things purposefully and not just mechanically?
Sep. 25, 2008 - Sounds like a book I'd like to read
Posted by kcmyworld
I, too, struggle with the value in ds's primary interests - super heroes, cartoons and tv/video games. (Yes, I limit his time, but he's still consumed with it!) I'm praying that as he matures, so will his interests!
Robin