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Oct. 24, 2008
Episode III - Find me a long handled frying pan....
Justyne: *Sitting on the couch* We need to do something today
Isilwen: *Slumped in a chair* Like cook?
Justyne: No, we already ate. Would you like to go shopping?
Theynore: *Sitting in another chair* For what?
Justyne: Nothing really, we could just go to the mall and look around.
Isilwen: Sounds fun.
Justyne: Yes! And we can go into Clair's.
Isilwen: Where?
Justyne: It is a nice store there, they sell jewlery and such.
Joshuel: Have fun, I will wait outside.
Maddock: You can hang out with me Josh.
Justyne: But I need you to tell me which hat looks the best.
Joshuel: You are joking aren't you?
Isilwen *Giggles from chair*
Maddock: Of course she is, Jonathan can do that for her!
Justyne: I need advice from my brother-in-law too!
Maddock & Joshuel: *try to run away*
Justyne: *jams doors and windows*
Joshuel: NO! *throws himself at Justyne's feet* PLEASE, my authoress. Don't do this to me, I beg you!
Justyne: *attempts to be firm* But I need your help.
Maddock: Why are you begging, Josh? We can always overpower them and force them not to take us through this Clair's.
Joshuel: *whispers to Maddock* Begging is the best way to manipulate my authoress. *turns back to Justyne* Please, my authoress. I don't know ANYTHING about hats! There's no sense in asking me for advice, how can I give any to you? I don't know what people consider fashionable in your world.
Maddock: She's soft-hearted? In that case... *falls to one knee before Justyne* I beg you, my lady, have mercy and do not force us to do this!
Justyne: *shuffles feet and sighes* Only if you find me a good long-handled frying pan and a package of rolling ball-point pins.
Joshuel & Maddock: Of course, my lady.
***Later at the store***
Joshuel: What store do you think they would be in?
Maddock: I don't see anything that looks remotely close!
Jordaan: Look! There's a food court!
Joshuel: Like that will help Jordaan!
Jordaan: It will, they might have something we're looking for!
Jordaan, Joshuel and Maddock: *runs up to the nearest food stand which happens to be the Julius Caesar*
Maddock: Sir we request one of your finest iron cast pans.
Jordaan: One with a long handle.
Joshuel: Serial number RRF1123575
Kid Behind the Counter: Uhhh...are you guys out of Lord of the Rings or something?
Jordaan: Nooooo.
Kid Behind the Counter: Then why are you dressed like that?
Maddock: *looks down at clothes* Like what?
Kid: Like Aragorn.
Joshuel: Who is he?
Jordaan: Who cares, we need a pan, can you help us?
Kid: This is where we sell food, not pans...I suggest you ask Sam for one *starts to laugh*
Joshuel: Where can we find him?
Kid: *Falls over laughing*
Maddock: Well that was helpful, come on guys, we can find this Sam on our own!
All three: *walk away, and toward another store*
Jordaan: *Reads sign* Household goods, I beat we can find one here.
Maddock: *Looks in the wondow* Me too, let's go in!
Joshuel: *finds sales-person* We seek Sam.
Sales-person: Sam? Sam who? Why?
Maddock: We need a frying pan.
Jordaan: A long handled frying pan for Josh's sister-in-law.
Joshuel: Serial number RRF1123575. An informant said that Sam could help us.
Sales-person: *blinks* Um, Sam isn't here today, it's not his shift. But I can help you just as well as he can. *scans the three medievally-dressed boys sceptically* Are you runaways from a movie set or something?
Maddock: No. We are three characters on a quest for a frying pan.
Sales-person: I see. *heads toward frying pan section with boys following* Why do you want a frying pan, if I may ask?
Joshuel: My sister in law needs it for cooking and fighting the Aranara when they come around.
Sales-person: Fight Ara-whata? What are they, some kinda gang?
Joshuel: No, they are a vicious race of people from the world I come from.
Sales-person: *is beginning to think that these boys are cracked* I see. Here are the frying pans.
Jordaan: *examines pans* Hmm...these look quite nice. What was the serial number we seek again, Josh?
Joshuel: RRF1123575.
Jordaan: I have found it!
Joshuel: Oh, good! *pulls out silver piece* Will this pay for it, good salesman?
Sales-person: Umm...I can't help you with that. You'll have to go to the front counter.
Maddock, Jordaan and Joshuel: *leaves sales-person with a thanks and heads towards the counter*
Clerk: May I...Help you?
Joshuel: Yes you may my good woman. We come here to purchase this frying pan.
Clerk: *shakes herself out of a daze and says* Here, let me ring it up for you.
Cash register: *makes many noises and comes up with a total.
Clerk: $55.25. Cash, Check, or Credit?
Jordaan: Excuse me, what?
Clerk: Cash, Check or Credit?
Joshuel: *hands the clerk the silver coin that is still in his hand* Will that be enough?
Clerk: I'm sorry but we can't take that. You'll have to get someone to change it for you.
Maddock: Like who?
Clerk: There is a guy who takes things like that and exchanges them for money. Do you know how to get there?
All three: Noooo.
Clerk: Alright, you go straight until you get to the end of the food court, turn right. Walk straight until you get to the giant panda bear, turn left until you get to the jewelry store, turn left again until you reach the store that says Sears, from there you take the right hall until you pass the main office, then you take a right past the big bar that says HOOTERS and your there. It'll say "Bob's Money".
Joshuel: Can you keep this here for us?
Clerk: Suuuuuure.
All three: Thank you! We shall return! *all walk off*
Clerk: *after they are out of earshot* Yeah, return of the kings!
***Several Hours Later***
Maddock: Where are we???!!!
Jordaan: I don't even know. You said you knew how to get there Joshuel!
Joshuel: I did! I just didn't do it in the right order.
Maddock: Way to go Josh, get us lost!
Joshuel: Well I didn't see YOU two helping!
Jordaan: You said you knew the way so we followed.
Maddock: Look, there is a man who seems to know what he is doing, let's ask him. *Walks up to man* Excuse me, but can you help us...
Man: *looks closely at them* I don't think I can offer you the kind of help you three need.
Joshuel: What?
Man: You are kind of early for Halloween, and way late for April Fools.
Jordaan: Why do I have the feeling you are mocking us?
Maddock: This is why no one comes to the mall anymore!
Man: You three trying out for a movie?
Maddock: *Rests hand on sword hilt* You want to take this outside?
Jordaan: Let me Maddock *Draws sword*
Man: Wow!! Put those up or I am going to call security!
Justyne: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
Joshuel: Trying to find a place called 'Bob's Money'.
Maddock: And instead of giving us directions, this fellow is taunting us. *looks angry*
Justyne: Good gravy. *grabs Jordaan's sword arm and turns to shopper* I'm sorry sir, my brothers tend to be a little melodramatic.
Man: I'll be about my business. *hurries off*
Justyne: *slams Jordaan's sword back into its sheath* What are you trying to do? Get yourselves a night in the jail?! I'll take you over to Bob's Money and then guide you back to the store you came from.
Jordaan: How do you know what store we came out of??
Justyne: My Elvish power. Come on. *leads them to Bob's Money, gets coins exchanged and escorts boys (with many stares from shoppers) back to the store from whence they set out* Try to act normally, boys. *leaves*
Maddock: But we were acting normally.
Justyne: Not normally enough for me! *stomps off very upset*
Joshuel: Not good for us guys. Let's get it right and we might get out of *gulp* picking out clothes!
Jordaan and Maddock: *rub their necks and gulp* Good idea.
Joshuel: *walks to the man behind the counter with a puzzled look* Excuse me sir, where did the lady who was behind the counter go?
Clerk: You mean Justine? She went home.
Joshuel: Not Justyne, the lady behind the counter.
Clerk: I told you, she went home.
Joshuel: No, she didn't, we just left her.
Clerk: And I'm telling you, she left to go home about an hour ago!
Joshuel: Then who did we talk to?
Clerk: When you were here? Justine, the sales assistant.
Joshuel: Justyne isn't a sales assistant! She's an authoress!
Clerk: Are we talking about the same Justine? J-u-s-t-i-n-e?
Joshuel: Oh. Different Justine. Alright. Um, did this Justine leave a frying pan behind the counter?
Clerk: Yes. Why?
Maddock: She was keeping it for us. We're buying it.
Clerk: Oh. *pulls out frying pan* Okay, that's $55.25. Cash, Check or Credit?
Joshuel: *pulls out money* Whatever this stuff is.
Clerk: Cash.
Joshuel: Okay. *counts out money* Here.
Jordaan: *takes sack that has frying pan in it*
All three: *leave*
Isilwen: *runs into them with Justyne and Theynore* That's it. We're taking you clothes shopping.
All three: WHAT??? NO!!
Justyne: You can't keep running around the mall in THAT getup, however normal it may be where you come from. To Sears we go!
Joshuel, Maddock and Jordaan: *trail after the three authors like a string of dejected prisoners*
Line of people at the checkout counter closest to the door: *gives weird looks as the motly group passes in dejection*
Joshuel: What are you looking at?!
Jordaan: Yeah!
Maddock: Haven't you seen a real warrior before?!
Justyne: Quiet you three! We have enough on our plates as it is! Come on! *goes back and grabs the hood of Joshuel's ear and drags him along*
Joshuel: OW! OW! OW!
Theynore and Isilwen: *go back and do the same with Jordaan and Maddock*
Jordaan and Maddock: OW! OW! OW!
Salesclerk in front of the men's section: *in a very hesitant voice* May I...help you???
Justyne: *still holding on to Joshuel's ear* Yes, we (stop your squirming) need some clothes for these three (you're making a scene!) YOUNG gentleman.
Salesclerk: Rrriiight...
Justyne: *tosses back hair* Nothing fancy. Just jeans and tee shirts.
Clerk: *leaves in search of requested items*
Joshuel: *in small voice* My authoress, what's a tee shirt?
Justyne: *expression softens* Just a piece of clothing. I wear them all the time. You needn't worry about it.
Clerk: *comes back with armful of clothes*
Maddock: *peers at clothes* I am not familiar with this kind of garment.
Justyne & Isilwen: *begin using female fashion skill on clothing*
Isilwen: *holds shirt up to Jordaan* This color will look very good on you, Jordaan.
Jordaan: *looks at shirt* I can't tell.
Joshuel: *cautiously* Um, do these pants come in brown?
Clerk: These jeans don't come in brown, but we do have some cargo pants that do.
Joshuel: And do the tee shirts come in green?
Clerk: They do. Would you like those colors, young man?
Joshuel: *brightens* Yes.
Clerk: *leaves and returns with cargo pants and green shirt*
Joshuel: That is alot of pockets. I...I rather like it.
Theynore: *claps cowboy hat on Maddock* There.
Authors: *buy clothes and have characters change into them*
***A little while later in the changing rooms***
Jordaan: Now how does this go together?
Joshuel: I don't know, try this. *grabs green t-shirt and sticks both feet through the arm holes*
Maddock: I don't think that's how it's supposed to look.
Joshuel: *starts jumping around, crashing into the walls and then falls over* OW!
Jordaan and Maddock: *snickers at the spectacle*
Joshuel: What are YOU two laughing at?
Jordaan: Nothing! *snickers again* I...*clears throat* I don't think that's how it goes.
*Characters manage to get dressed and stumble out holding old clothing*
Maddock: What do we do with our swords?
Isilwen: for Pete's sake Maddock! Why on earth did you even bring them?
Theynore: Yeah, you really won't have a chance to fight anyone in a mall
Justyne: Here, just wrap them in your cloaks and we will put them in these bags. *proceeds to do so* There, now shall we be off?
Jordaan: I am hungry
Joshuel: Me too!!!
Maddock: Me as well!!! Getting lost really gives you an appitite!
Justyne: Shall we get lunch then?
Theynore: Why not?
Isilwen: Sure, led the way!
Justyne: *leads the way to food court* Where should we get food?
Joshuel: Every time we've tried to get something, we've gotten in trouble and confused people. I am going to sit right here in this chair and not do anything. *sits in chair and is joined by other characters*
Theynore: I'll go over to the Burger King and get us all hamburgers. *leaves*
Justyne: *drags another table over against first table and sits down* You guys have had a hard day.
Jordaan: Tell me about it.
Joshuel: We...we still have to get your pens, my authoress.
Jordaan and Maddock: Josh!!
Jordaan: You don't have to remind her, you know.
Justyne: *suddenly looks very tender and motherly* Oh, boys. I honestly didn't know what I was putting you through. I'll get my own pens.
Maddock: Here's the frying pan. *holds up frying pan*
Justyne: *takes and examines frying pan* This is the best long-handled frying pan I've seen.
Joshuel: Serial number RRF1123575.
Justyne: *laughs* Good choice.
Theynore: *returns with food*
Isilwen: *passes out food*
Theynore: I got you guys water.
Maddock: Good. I've seen enough strange new things to last me several years. Water is incredibly normal.
Joshuel: Even when it does come in strange containers.
Jordaan: *eating hamburger with vigor* Mph.
Isilwen: *finishes food* Come on. Let's get on home.
Everyone: *leaves*
***At home****
Jordaan and Maddock: *both want to crash on couch, fight over it, are too tired and go to sleep on floor where they were wrestling*
Joshuel: *claims couch*
Justyne: *turns off living room lights, puts pillows under characters heads and covers them with blankets in a motherly way*
Authors: *tiptoe off to bedrooms, giggling over events*
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The Story of the Flatts
* The Twins
* Tarantula Hunt
* Theynore Gets Sick
* Why Justyne Runs the Kitchen
* A Trip to the Mall
* Dreaming Reality
* Justyne's Birthday
* Kantare's Birthday
* A Trip to Trinity
* Theynore's Birthday
The Siblings
* Full Bio
* Full Bio
* Full Bio
* Full Bio
Nutty Soliloquy
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Posted by No blog!!! *humph* 
Posted by 
Nov. 8, 2008 - Untitled Comment