Nov. 25, 2009 - Thanksgiving Food and Fun!

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday!  While I love Christmas, "the world" has taken over the Christmas holiday to such a degree that it is hard to focus on Jesus' birth.  My family and I have some wonderful Christmas traditions that help us think about the birth of Jesus at Christmas and not get so caught up in presents and all of that "stuff."  I will post about some of those traditions later.  For now, though, I am really getting excited about celebrating Thanksgiving tomorrow. 

I love Thanksgiving because it is so much fun to get together with many of my family members and just have a great time eating and visiting together.  There aren't any presents to buy and bring.  There's no pressure to do anything except just eat and visit--two of my favorite activities!  And there's always so much food that, if something doesn't look good to me, I don't have to eat it because no one will ever notice.   

My older daughter has autism and doesn't care much for helping me cook, but my 6-year-old daughter has been assisting me with cooking for the past few days.  We have made "real" food and lots of sweets and things that are really bad for us!  I confess!  The truth is that we only eat all of these sweets once a year, so maybe it's not too awfully bad for us.  (At least we tell ourselves that!) 

Some of our favorite things we've made over the last few days are Martha Washington candy, pumpkin pies, and a new recipe we tried for gooey butter pumpkin cake.  I think Mary Grace (my assistant) and I could eat a whole pumpkin pie each.  (No kidding.) 

It has been so much fun this week taking some time off and just enjoying being together and having fun.  We have taken time to play some games together.  We have listened to our first Christmas music of the year while baking and cooking.  We have started burning our apple and pumpkin scented candles.  All of those things really make it seem to us as if the holidays are truly here. 

The day after Thanksgiving (while all of those brave bargain hunters are out fighting the crowds), we will all be here safe at home taking down our "fall" decorations and putting up our Christmas tree.  My kids love turning off all of the lights at night and just looking at the beautiful lights on the tree.  We always put it up the day after Thanksgiving so we can enjoy it as many weeks as possible. 

I think it's so important to have holiday family traditions.   They make our kids and us feel cozy and comfortable and loved.  The help us to feel like we are part of something special--the particular family that God placed us in. 

This Thanksgiving, I am thankful for my family and for our family traditions.  I thank God for each family member.  I thank Him that I have a Christian husband who loves us and takes good care of us.  I am so blessed, and I am looking forward to our "official" day of thankfulness tomorrow! 

If any of you would like to post about your family's Thanksgiving traditions, I would love to hear about them!    If you are reading this on Facebook, just click on "view original post" at the bottom of this post, and it will take you straight to my blog.  You can leave your comment there so my blog readers can read your comment too.    Blessings to all of you on Thanksgiving.

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Nov. 19, 2009 - I Need Patience (And I Need It Right Now!)

I have heard many moms who don't homeschool say that they don't have the patience to homeschool their children.  I think these moms have it backwards.  I don't homeschool because I already have the patience I need to do it.  I develop the patience as I homeschool my children and as a result of homeschooling my children.  This morning as I was attempting to get dressed and out the door in order to be on time for an appointment, I had a wonderful opportunity to develop more patience! 

We try not to schedule appointments (for myself or the children) early in the mornings if we can avoid it.  Because we normally don't have to immediately get up, get dressed, and leave the house in the mornings, it can be difficult to do on those occasions when an early morning appointment is unavoidable. 

This morning I needed to leave the house as soon as the sitter for the children arrived.  She was due to arrive at 8:30.  I was planning to let Hannah (my 14-year-old daughter who has autism) sleep until the sitter arrived because Hannah must have help doing her morning routine.  (I have to help her in the bathroom, brush her teeth for her, help her wash her hands, dress her, and give her her breakfast and medicine.)  It takes 15 or 20 minutes minimum to get Hannah's morning routine done, so I thought it would save time if she just slept until the sitter arrived, and then the sitter could help her do her morning list of things.  Well, you guessed it, Hannah didn't sleep late today!  Normally, she will sleep as long as I will let her, but not today!  Today she woke up at 7:45--just about the time I was beginning to get dressed and ready for my appointment. 

It wouldn't have been so difficult if Hannah had simply gotten up a little early.  She decided that I needed a little lesson in patience today, though, so she proceeded to give me one!  After I did her morning routine, I told her that she could listen to some music (she LOVES music) in the living room while I got dressed in my bathroom. 

Hannah will usually listen to her music and wait patiently until I (or someone else) can begin doing her school work with her.  Unknown to me, Hannah decided this morning (while I was in my bathroom putting on makeup) that she was going to refill her own glass of tea.  Because her motor skills are really poor, she has trouble doing things like that alone.  I'm sure you guessed again--she spilled the entire gallon of tea all over the floor in the process!! 

I didn't know she had spilled the tea until I went in the living room to check on her after I was about half way finished getting dressed and ready to go.  I noticed something liquid all over the floor in the kitchen/living room, but I didn't know what it was.  Upon closer inspection, I discovered what had happened.  My heart just sank as I realized it would take me probably 15 minutes or more to clean up the mess, and then I still had to finish getting ready myself!!  There went my hopes of getting out the door on time.

In past years when things like that have happened, I have gotten upset and angry.  While my first reaction this morning was to be angry and upset, I knew that wasn't the right reaction.  I also knew it wasn't going to help the situation at all, and it would probably just make it worse.  Please don't think that I am "patting myself on the back" for having the "right" reaction.  I truly believe that God has allowed such circumstances to occur often enough in my life that I have learned, with His guidance, to control my emotions and be more patient. 

Did I leave the house on time this morning?  Not quite.  Was I upset and angry and off to a bad start because of the circumstances?  I am so happy to say that I wasn't!  Even though most people would say that my day started off on the "wrong foot," because I chose to be patient, the morning's happenings didn't ruin the rest of the day. 

The point is certainly not that I am so patient and wonderful.  While I wish that were the case, it isn't.  The point is that, with God to lean on and to learn from, I can be patient when I need to be!  I don't always react in the right way, but I am learning and getting better at it.  I am so thankful that God allows me to benefit from having the right attitude, yet He is merciful even when I don't.  Isn't it wonderful that God is so patient with us?!  Let's all try, especially with the stress of the holidays coming, to be more patient and loving with our children and even our spouses.  In the end, we will ALL benefit from it! 

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Nov. 18, 2009 - Too Much of a Good Thing?

Have any of you homeschooling moms ever felt like laughing when folks who don't homeschool ask if your children receive "enough" socialization?  Between church activities, homeschool support group activities, sports, clubs, and get-togethers with friends and relatives, the problem in my family seems to be not how to get enough socialization but how to limit socialization in order to get school work done! 

I have been homeschooling my children for about 12 years.  For the last 8 years, I have been active in my local homeschool support group.  My support group is made up of smaller groups that we call "family" groups.  The family group that I have always been a part of is a very active group!  Each week a play day is offered.  Usually once a month (or more often at times) a field trip is offered.  There are also holiday parties, activites like reading fairs and science fairs, and I've probably forgotten to list some other events/activities that are offered. 

"What do the above two paragraphs have to do with each other?" you may be wondering.  Well, I'll tell you! 

Toward the end of the last school year, I realized that it was going to be difficult (though possible) for us to finish all of our work by the end of May or the beginning of June.  We had participated in so many activities and events in the homeschool group, at church, on sports teams, and with friends and relatives that there were many days when we had a little bit of school work that just didn't quite get done.  (Every year we finish everything in our textbooks and workbooks, etc.  I remember when I was in school we hardly ever actually completed a math book or even a science or history book.  I don't want my children to miss out on the information in a certain subject simply because it was offered toward the end of the year.  If it's important enough to be in there, I figure it's important enough to study and learn about it.)

I remember talking to another homechooling mom who has more children than I do and who has been homeschooling longer than I have.  When I asked her how she managed to get school work done with all of her children and do the regular house cleaning, cooking, and other necessary jobs around the house, she said that her first priority has always been trying to stay home more and participate less in all of the activities that are offered to our homeschooled students.

When she first gave me that bit of wisdom, I just thought, "Well, that's ok for her if that's what she chooses to do.  I think it's important for my kids to attend all of these activities."  Then I just put it out of my mind and kept on with my regular routine. 

It worked for years--until my two older children reached ages at which their school work takes more time each day to complete.  As I struggled to keep up with what had become our regular routine and to try to give them time to get all of each day's school work done, I remembered what my friend had told me years ago.  This time, her advice made so much more sense to me than it had when I first received it.

Over the summer, I got my children's books, notebooks, lesson plans, and any other necessary materials ready for the school year. Then, when the school year began, I was ready to go!  I also decided over the summer that we were going to make it a priority to limit outside activities and make sure we were home enough to get our school work done without it being a struggle.

Now that it is mid-November, I have to admit that this school year has gone more smoothly, been less stressful, and been more productive than any other school year since we began homeschooling!  Do I think socialization is important?  Yes!  Do I think my children should socialize to the point that it is difficult to get their school work done?  No!  In fact, I have decided that the next time a new homeschool mom asks me for advice or tips about how to homeschool, my #1 piece of advice will be to make sure she stays at home as much as possible! 

The opportunities for socialization are many.  It is tempting to take advantage of too many of them at the expense of time needed at home.  I would like to encourage each of you to take a look at your "outside" activities to see if perhaps you are spending too much time everywhere else and not enough time at home.  Even if the activities your children participate in are good things, we all need to be sure we aren't getting "too much of a good thing!" 

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Nov. 17, 2009 - Limelight Review

After reading What Matters Most:  Diary of a Teenage Girl by Melody Carlson, I was a little skeptical about reading Limelight by the same author.  The "teen" book was fine for teens, but I was hoping this book, meant more for adults than teens, would be a little more appealing to me.  I found that I really enjoyed this book very much!  It is based on the familiar theme of the rich and famous falling from favor in Hollywood as the beauty and grace associated with youthfulness is lost during the process of aging.   In the end, the reader can see how God has answers we can't always understand or plan for.

This book is filled with hilarious yet tragic "spins" on this old story that make the book highly interesting and different.  As Claudette's life changes, you will feel her pain and triumph in a way that makes her seem real.  If nothing else, you will see that, even on your nastiest day, things "can always get worse!" 

I found Claudette to be alternatingly pitiful and brave and bold.  Her radical life change (moving, leaving all she has known most of her life, becoming poor and lonely) is handled by the writer in such a way as to seem possible and not contrived.  The way Claudette stubbornly hangs on to old ways of thinking and old beliefs is frustrating and familiar to anyone who has ever had a family in "real life!" 

I think you will come to like Claudette in spite of her peculiarities as I did.  You will be proud as you learn with her that, "with God, all things are possible."

If you would like to purchase a copy of this book, you may do so at http://waterbrookmultnomah.com/catalog.php?isbn=9781400070824.

I received this book free in exchange for reviewing it on my blog.

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Nov. 16, 2009 - Am I Good Enough?

Am I good enough or smart enough or organized enough to homeschool my children?  The answer is definitely no!  Then you may wonder why I homeschool instead of sending my children to school somewhere.  The answer is that I am being obedient to God.

Years ago when my oldest daughter was about 2 years old, she received a diagnosis of autism.  (She is 14 now.)  I began homeschooling her without even really realizing what I was doing.  I just knew that, without some early and intensive help, she would never learn to do the things that typical children learn to do on their own.  (You can read about the beginnings of my homeschool journey with her here: http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/ourcrewsship/699789/.)  When Hannah was only 3 years old, I began intensively homeschooling her.  A few years later when it was time for my son to start kindergarten, it just seemed natural to keep him at home and homeschool him as well.  (Now I have another daughter who is 6 years old who homeschools too.)

There have been many times during the 12 or so years that I have homeschooled my children when I thought I wasn't doing a good job.  There have been times when I thought about how nice it would be to send them to school just so I could have a little free time during the day!!  (Oh well, I'm just being honest!)  I have persevered, though, because my husband and I truly believe that we are doing what God has called us to do. 

On the days that I feel like I'm not doing such a good job, I just have to remember that, if I am obeying God by teaching my children at home, then all He expects me to do is the best I can do!  I have to remember that, because I am obeying Him, He will take care of my deficits and make sure my children don't "suffer" because of my weaknesses.  God knows what my children need to learn and what skills they need to possess to be successful at whatever He has for them to do as adults.  I just have to be willing to do my best each day while I have them here at home.

It helps so much to take some of the pressure off of me when I stop and remind myself of those things.  I still have days that I feel like I'm not doing a good job.  I still have days when I feel disorganized and grumpy and tired.  But the good news is that, when I have those days, I know that God will make up for my weaknesses and mistakes. 

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