Dec. 27, 2006 - Gerald Ford's Death and What That Means to Me
I got up this morning and began reading the FIAR boards (my normal routine) and discovered former president Gerald Ford had died in the night. What a shock! My 6 1/2 year old is a presidential nut. He knows all things presidential. Earlier this fall, he watched with great anticipation as Ford became the longest-lived president. He wrote to Ford and received a letter in return (with what we think is a "real-deal" signature).Anyway, I told him the news this morning and he took it in stride. In fact, he seems almost happy about it. It's another presidential fact for him to know. He's spent half the morning writing the date down in all of his president books. He keeps repeating over and over and over that Ford and Truman have the same death date, just like John Adams, Jefferson and Monroe all died on July 4th. He is making a list of all the presidents who died in the state of CA (Ford, Reagan and Harding). I know in my head it is just the Asperger's Syndrome. People with Asperger's don't express the same sorts of emotions as others. Joel is just looking at this as another bit of presidential knowledge. To him it's just a fact ...nothing to mourn about or feel sad over.
I saw all those posts on the FIAR board with my sweet FIAR sisters mentioning feeling concerned for my Joel and how he would take the news. If only they knew ... I know that probably anyone else's son with a great interest in presidents would cry or be upset or ask a lot of questions about death. And when moments like this happen, my little bubble of thinking Joel is just like any other 6 year old boy (other than his great interest in presidents and his amazing ability to memorize/remember facts) is completely popped and I feel, in almost an overwhelming kind of way, just how different he is than the rest of the world.
So I'm grieving today ...for the loss of a President, one who was honest and true and ultimately helped heal our nation from some terrible trials. America will certainly feel the hole left behind by this American patriot.
But today I am also grieving for my own son and for what Asperger's has cost him. I know it isn't a death sentence in the way other horrific childhood diseases might be. I know that most likely he will grow to adulthood, be able hold down a fine job (perhaps even as a college history or political science professor) and quite possibly even marry and have children. But he will always, always, always struggle to see the world as the rest of us do and to respond appropriately. And for that I feel an even greater sense of loss.
Comments
Dec. 27, 2006 - Untitled Comment
Posted by eclecticeducation
I'm sorry to hear about your struggles. I'm a mother with two special needs children and I understand the pain that your struggling with. We want everything for our children but sometimes it feels like we just hope we can survive the day. I will pray for your family.
Dec. 28, 2006 - Praying for you
Posted by BlessedBeingMom
I am sorry if it was hurtful what I said on the board about thinking about Joel. I did not realize the struggles you are going through. I will be praying for you all.
With love,
Tricia O
With love,
Tricia O
Jan. 3, 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by HarvestChristian
Paige, I know it is hard to deal with our little guys and their special needs. A mom's heart continues to grieve in situations that remind us of the differences. Praying for you today!! Love and Prayers!
