On Thursday and Friday this past week the family took all our music equipment over to the church to spread out and do some practicing and recording.  As a result of 4 hours work we have approximately 2 minutes of usable tape (pretty typical!)  One day I'll figure out how to actually insert an MP3 or a link to one here but in the meanwhile this is one of the songs that really touched me.  It's "I Was in His Mind" by Jane LaRowe, copyright 1970.

I was in His mind before the worlds were made,

I was in His mind before earth's frame was laid,

Because He knew me, because He loved me.

I was in His thoughts the night He prayed for me,

I was in His thoughts before Gethsemene,

Because He saw me, because He loved me.

I was in His heart when Calvary's hill He climbed,

I was in His heart when He died for all mankind,

Because He sought me, because He loved me.

I am in His mind and soon He'll come for me,

I am in His mind with Him in heaven to be,

Because He wants me, because He loves me, because He loves me.

    I sent the MP3 to one friend.  I didn't know why at the time, because it was so rough.  But I just felt the urge to do that.  She sent me back a lovely encouraging email about how that song touched her.  I was amazed (again!) about how sometimes you do something, a little random thing, and you wonder where that idea came from (or you don't think about it at all) and then come to find out it was the Holy Spirit moving through your life.  Praise God!

   Those who know me know that I love to sing the old Celtic hymns, especially anything in a minor key.  This week I've been singing both "How Firm a Foundation" and "Immortal, Invisible".  "Immortal, Invisible" is based on an old Welsh melody named St. Denio and the words are 19th century by Walter Chalmers Smith.  But to me they are pure praise and adoration.

Immortal, Invisible, God Only Wise

Immortal, Invisible, God only Wise,

in Light inaccessible hid from our eyes,

most blessed, most glorious, the Ancient of Days,

almighty, victorious, thy great name we praise.

Unresting, unhasting, and silent as light,

nor wanting, nor wasting, thou rulest in might;

thy justice like mountains high soaring above

thy clouds which are fountains of goodness and love.

To all, life thou givest, to both great and small;

in all life thou livest, the true life of all;

we blossom and flourish as leaves on the tree,

and wither and perish, but naught changeth thee.

Thou reignest in glory; thou dwellest in light;

thine angels adore thee, all veiling their sight;

all laud we would render; O help us to see

'tis only the splendor of light hideth thee.

   Living in what I think are the most beautiful hills in the world has given me an appreciation of the symbolism of the mountain as the dwelling place of God.  So high and mighty and unmoving and unchanging.  We went up to the Peaks yesterday and got to see spring time arrive again.  The wildflowers are gorgeous now, the trails were lined with carpets of violets.  I praise God for His glorious creation today. 

Go to Jacque's blog "Seeking Rest in the Ancient Paths" for more Saturday Psalm and Praise.

    April 16th came and went almost unnoticed here.  I didn't even think about what we were doing last year on that day until I noticed all the maroon and orange everywhere at FW Friends.  It was Virginia Tech Day one of the kids told me.  "Oh yeah," I thought, "I remember."

   I remember fear gripping me even though I knew Matthew was safe.  He had called, he was fine.  Was Ben OK?  Was Janice OK?  Fielding phone calls all day long... "Yes, Matt called, he's alright."  "Thanks for calling, we're fine."  "Love you too, yes, I'll tell Matt."  Preparing for the remembrance service.  Singing On Eagle's Wings.  "You need not fear the terror of the night, or the arrow that flies by day..."  Yellow tulips.

   I don't think I shared that story in all that happened last year.  I had a dream on the Friday night after the shooting.  I dreamed that I was on the drill field at Tech.  It was cold and dark and utterly absolutely silent.  But on the drill field were thousands of lit candles in those little candle cups.  No one was holding them they were just scattered all over the field.  Then slowly the sky lightened and the sun rose.  The air warmed and started filling with little sounds, like bird song and insects. And when I looked at the field all the candles had turned into thousands of beautiful yellow tulips.  And I knew that "sorrow may last for a night, but joy comes in the morning."

   Now the spring flowers are blooming again.  And everywhere I see yellow tulips.  There might not be a Hokie heaven, like the billboard in Roanoke says, but I know that our Lord reigns in heaven and that He will wipe away our tears.

   I am so enjoying our first spring in Southwest Virginia.  One thing that has been interesting to me is watching spring creep up the mountains.  Where I grew up in eastern Kentucky the mountains are shorter and closer together.  We lived halfway up windy little hollers nestled right in the hillsides.  Here at the edge of the Blue Ridge Mountains I can see 5 miles away to a series of peaks close to 4000 feet tall.  So here I can see a line of green advancing up the mountainsides.  The green creeps up in lines along the protected edge of the ridges and hollows.  So it looks like fingers of green pointing towards the peaks.  Here at the base of the mountains the dogwood and redbud are in glorious bloom.  I expect that two weeks after our blooms have faded I will be able to drive up to the Blue Ridge Parkway and enjoy the height of springtime again.

   Another nice surprise is that we have a lilac bush!  It's so interesting to find out that the boring shrubbery of last summer is actually forsythia and lilac.  It's supposed to freeze hard again tonight, maybe for the last time.  Bethany and I are going out after supper to cover her strawberries.  Mr. Berry, our dear neighbor, gave us some mint this morning.  We're going to plant it along the woods.

   The ravening hordes are starting to tear apart my refridgertor.  I better go throw some food to them.

   I'm fixing next week to start the biannual clothing tradeout.  Starting with Lydia (age 4) and moving up the line I'll be removing all the clothes from the dressers.  Packing away the winter clothes either to give away or keep for next winter, throwing away the stuff that is too worn.  This has got to be my most dreaded regular task.  It takes me approximately a month to finish working at about 4 or so hours a week.

   But I save lots and lots of money this way.  I know this isn't a new hint but it must be the one that saves us the MOST money every year.  I gratefully accept all the hand me down clothes that I am offered.  I sort through them immediately giving away things we will NEVER use.  I divide the rest by season and sort through them by size as that season rolls around.  The only things I ever buy are socks, shoes and underwear and even then we are given some underwear and shoes that work for us.  (I hope used underwear doesn't gross anyone out...I DO wash it first!)

   I haven't bought a handbag in 15 years.  I was given a stack of purses many years ago, barely used.  I sorted through them, gave away the ones that I would never use.  As I wear out a purse I just pick another one from the stack.  Now I'm down to colors and sizes that I'm not particularly happy with...so it might be time to buy one.  The ones that are left won't hold my daytimer or Bible.

   I'm not sure what the national average for clothing purchases is.  But last week the kids were working on banking in math in the Abeka curriculum.  They were recording checks in a check register and making budgets.  The example had them budgeting something near a thousand dollars for one person for clothing.  Both teens thought that was WAY out of line.  We figured out that for all 8 of us we spend less than $500 a year on shoes and clothing.

  So I will attempt to remember how much money I'm saving as I sort through boxes of clothes in the basement for hours and hours over the next month.  Check out the rest of the hints for this weeks Tightwad Tuesday, sponsored by Canadagirl.

   The theory behind "ugly" day is that there are certain tasks you put off and put off because you think they are going to be difficult, time consuming, messy, whatever....   So you put these jobs on your to do list and feel guilty because they never get done and every day you write them down again and again you don't do them.  So instead of this guilt cycle you should pick one day of the month and just do those "ugly" jobs.  Don't even think about doing them on any other day.  Don't harass yourself with guilty thoughts, because you are going to do that job on "ugly" day.  This concept is discussed on the Make Today Matter website at brooknoelstudio.com.  I think I've heard other folk call this a "just do it" day or "anti-procrastination" day.

   So TODAY is ugly day and this morning I'm going to finish cleaning out the van and make a decent start on cleaning out the unfinished area of the basement.  Maybe even get the ping pong table unloaded enough that we could play a game of ping pong.  Maybe even set up some band equipment so that we could do some recording which is something I really really want to do.  I won't have time today, but maybe on next months "ugly" day I'll finish all the mending that's piling up.  Bethany and Tom are even doing something "ugly" today.  They are going to go to the Thaxton Youth and Community Center and rake up leaves with the youth group of our church and the baptist church on a joint project.

   I thought this week was going to be soooo "ugly".  I had decided last month that this was the week to potty train Moriah.  I was envisioning a loooong frustrating week cleaning up puddles.  But she is doing so well.  She had one accident on Tuesday and one on Wednesday.  Yesterday she went in the potty almost every time I took her there.  And Joe tells me that while I was out picking up Tom she actually came to him and said "peepee potty".  We have been rewarding her with a turn on the computer watching a cartoon with every successful attempt.  With seven successful attempts yesterday I think I might need to come up with another reward.  She can't watch "movies" on the computer all day long. 

   Today I think I'll give her a choice of snack, "movie' or outside time with each success.  The doctor was completely opposed to treats as a reward for children with Down Syndrome, since most kids with DS tend to overweight.  But Moriah is NOT overweight.  She is a busy busy girl and is a very healthy weight.

   So I think we might be over the hump with the peepee in the potty.  Now if we can train her to put her "poopoo" in the potty, we'll be DONE!

Sorry I've been MIA for the last week or so.  Sometimes it seems you run and run and run and don't get anywhere.  That's where I've been for awhile.  On the little hamster wheel of life.  On the "up" side: I've been getting more schoolwork done with the kids and the house is marginally cleaner.  On the "down" side: I have a headcold and feel totally stressed.

I read Terry Pratchett's Making Money last week and the Blue Ridge Library is holding another book for me that I've been looking forward to reading.  We had a nice visit with some old friends on Monday.  The van passed inspection (after $500 worth of work!)  Matt is enjoying his new job. Joe has lost 11 pounds with his new diet.

Really all IS right with us.  God is in control.

   O.K.  This is a weird one.  But my dh has been fasting lately and we have really been saving some money.  So here ya go.  Stop eating one day a week, you can lose weight, save money, and also use it as a time of spiritual growth.  Or those same things in a different order.

   You can avoid purchasing pencils by stocking up at job fairs, festivals, spring open houses at various businesses.  Yes, all your pencils will say things like "Modern Woodmen" or "Jones Heating and Air Conditioning" but if your household goes through pencils like ours does, it's a small "price" to pay, i.e. free!

    My 12 yo was just reminding me about all the neat things we get for free at our Methodist Annual Conference.  I have to admit not only is it the PLACE to get pencils that say "United Methodist Homes", but notepads, sewing kits, plastic bracelets, free snacks and lollipops, and a pill dispenser that Bethany uses to store seed beads.

   I had a marvelous time at the Clergy Spouse Retreat in Blackstone.  I caught up with some friends that I normally only see in passing at Annual Conference.  And I made some new friends that I hope I can keep in touch with.  It was a fairly small group, about 40 people.  The program was on de-stressing and finding joy.  It struck me though that the people that came to this program were probably not the ones that NEEDED the program.  Gail had us take an inventory to show us ways we could alleviate stress.  It had things on it like, exercise, healthy eating, don't drink or smoke, etc.  Most of us already do those things.  The only thing I could do to improve my life (according to this inventory) was drink less coffee.  And I'm not sure I WANT to drink less coffee. 

  But the spouses at this retreat were THERE!  They had made an effort to reach out to each other and connect.  That was a major stress reliever right there.  To be able to say, "How do you get a parsonage committee to agree to replacing the (furniture, toilet, dishwasher, etc. etc.)"  and have 20 other people say "I KNOW what you mean!"  To be able to talk about the stress of always being in "view", that fishbowl syndrome, and have those around you understand. 

   I was telling Joe about the program and what fun I had and he said that it sounds like I'm already making plans for being there next year.  I think he's right.

   I had been worrying about whether the volunteers at FW Friends would get along without us today.  During devotions yesterday I was led to the Sermon on the Mount, the section entitled in my Bible, Do Not Worry.  I know Jesus was talking about worrying about food and clothing, but  the last few verses really spoke to my situation.  "Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own."

    And then during Bible study yesterday afternoon Joe had picked for us to sing "Seek ye First".  I was stunned that he chose the same verse that I had been meditating on.  And Rita had called and said "Don't worry, we can handle it...just go and be with your husband."  I have very real peace about both Joe and I being gone this afternoon.   Matthew will handle Games and Music, Bethany will handle opening and closing, and either Angie will be there to help with my group or Rita will add my girls to hers.  Joe was teasing me saying, "So how does it feel to be not as necessary as you thought?"  Silly man, I'm thrilled.

   And Joe thanked me SEVERAL times for being with him at the viewing last night.  I KNOW I'm doing the right thing.   The kids were fine here at the house, though I had alerted the Berrys that we would be gone and they said they'd be available for an emergency.  And it was lovely to see old friends and family and we will be able to talk more this afternoon at the funeral supper.  I must be getting OLD to start getting so much enjoyment out of a funeral.  But a funeral of an old saint in the Lord, gone to Jesus after a life well lived is so different than, for example, that funeral Joe had last December for little Tyler.  That one was gut-wrenching.  And we do not grieve as those who have no hope!  Praise God!

   This week is already starting with uncertainties for me.  Joe's dear uncle in heart died yesterday morning.  Ed and Joe's dad have been best friends forever, even had a double wedding, oh 60 or so years ago.  The families were very close.  Now Ed is home with the Lord and we are dealing with now.  So the funeral is set for Wednesday at 2.  Most definately Joe will not be at FW Friends and I'm thinking I should be with Joe, but I don't think it can operate with both of us gone, either one of us, yes, but not BOTH of us.  I think I may pray for the schools to be closed Wednesday and then it will be a moot point.  How's that for selfishness?

   Oh yes, the plan:

Monday: school, therapy, grocery shopping, craft night at the library

Tuesday: school, Bible study, viewing in Stuarts Draft?? will we go?

Wednesday: school, (FW Friends or funeral for me?)

Thursday: school, ladies prayer meeting, evening Bible study

Friday: gone to the clergy spouse retreat in Blackstone

Saturday: coming home from the retreat mid afternoon

Sunday: church and in the evening a progressive dinner for the youth (we're doing appetizers)

   I feel all up in the air and rootless for some reason.  I guess not knowing my plan!

Here is the photo we had done back in October. 

Jocelyn at http://aponderingheart.com/blog/?p=351 is having a family photo contest.  Check it out!

Almost done with my latest pair of socks.  You can still see the paper clip holding it together at the end.  I guess I better take care of that before I wear it.

   I did GREAT at the grocery store yesterday.  $176 for the week's stuff.  Lately I've been going over $200 a week.  Part of that is because I decided to eat more out of the freezer.  Sometimes I forget all about the things I've frozen.  I did a freezer inventory and discovered chicken and green beans and loads of tomato sauce from last summer. (I'm going to just assume it's still good....)  So my hint for this week is:  Don't forget your freezer!

   Back when we lived in Mechanicsville Va we were very near a bakery thrift store.  I would go and buy the day old bread and baked goods and freeze those.  This was much cheaper than making my own bread.  (Though not as nutritious and tasty.)   Here in Bedford County I have yet to find a bakery thrift store.  I presume there might be one in Roanoke and I could stop by there on Mondays after Moriah's speech therapy if it's not too far out of the way.  With gas prices as they are you need to factor travel expenses into any special jaunts you might run.  Joe occasionally has cause to go to Lynchburg and he could do shopping too.

I'm going to go ahead and get the planning done here too!

Monday: school, take food to Bedford Christian ministries, take Moriah to speech, go grocery shopping

(lunch is spaghetti and mozzerella bread)

Tuesday: school, YMCA, afternoon Bible study

(lunch is chicken oyster pie and peas)

Wednesday: school, Faithweaver Friends, this week Joe is preaching at the Lenten lunch downtown

(lunch/supper is snitz and knepp and broccoli)

Thursday: school, ladies prayer meeting in the afternoon, evening Bible study, no choir practice this week.

(lunch is split pea soup)

Friday: school catch up day, YMCA, fun stuff with Joe and friends

(lunch is latkes and applesauce)

Saturday: housework, etc.  (lunch is hamburgers and fried cabbage)

Sunday: church (fellowship, Sunday school, services in the a.m. youth meeting and song service in the p.m.)  (we'll probably just have mac and cheese for lunch)

    We try to always have our dinner at lunch time.  This works very well for us, because Joe works from home and I have MUCH more energy in the morning than I do the evening.   I need to plan ahead for the first weekend of March also.  I'll be out of town at a clergy spouse retreat Feb. 29 and March 1.

My (current) favorite hymn is "What Wondrous Love is This".  This is an Appalachian folk hymn.  The tune is haunting, the words are full of praise and wonder.

What wondrous love is this, O my soul, O my soul,

What wondrous love is this, O my soul!

What wondrous love is this that caused the Lord of bliss

to bear the dreadful curse for my soul, for my soul,

to bear the dreadful curse for my soul.

What wondrous love is this, O my soul, O my soul,

What wondrous love is this, O my soul!

What wondrous love is this that caused the Lord of life

to lay aside his crown for my soul, for my soul,

to lay aside his crown for my soul.

To God and to the Lamb I will sing, I will sing,

to God and to the Lamb I will sing;

to God and to the Lamb who is the great I AM,

while millions join the theme I will sing, I will sing,

while millions join the theme I will sing.

And when from death I'm free, I'll sing on, I'll sing on,

and when from death I'm free, I'll sing on,

and when from death I'm free, I'll sing and joyful be,

and through eternity I'll sing on, I'll sing on

and through eternity, I'll sing on.