This is what I compiled recently for our women's group's meeting on "Encouragement".  Several ladies wrote up some things to help encourage other women and a booklet was made with them.  It was a great idea!

The Gift of Laughter

“She can laugh at the days to come…”  Proverbs 31:25 NIV

Five years ago, I could not remember the last time I had laughed.  I know I had gone months without hardly even smiling.

I had reached the end of what I had always considered my “strong spiritual roots” due to a severe financial setback in our home that we had not seen coming.  I was suffering from controlling, paralyzing fear over circumstances beyond my control.

But the Lord was teaching me some deeper things that I could never have learned without the trials we were in the midst of.  He wanted me fully willing to “surrender all” and “be content” in whatever circumstances came my way.  I cannot point to one defining moment because it was a process the Lord was walking me through, but a while later, after many dark nights, I was finally able to thank Him for taking my control away from me, because I had learned to hand it over to Him!  I could thank Him for helping me to be content in my circumstances because I had learned He was always there in the midst ~ in control.  I could finally see that I had no reason to fear because He had always been my Provider, my Peace, my Comforter, even when I had not been so sure of it.  I knew that He was truly all I needed.

It was finally getting from my head to my heart.  I was learning to trust.  It was taking a while, but I was learning, and am still in the process.

While still in the midst of many of our financial trials, I began to notice that I was laughing again.  I wrote this in my journal:

"Thank You for laughter ~ the gift of laughter.  A gift is never more appreciated than when it is gone.  You have given it back to me and I worship Your awesome name for such an incredible, beautiful gift.  Your love for me is revealed to me every time I am able to hear myself laugh again."

Father, I pray that my spiritual sisters who may be hurting or fearful or weary of their journey today may be filled with joy in Your presence.  And I also pray that laughter may be part of their daily lives as they lay their worries at Your feet and gaze upon You.  Help each of us to approach each day as it comes with the beauty of laughter…because You are in total control of all of our days.  And help us to realize each time we laugh that it is a gift from You. 

“She can laugh at the days to come…” 

Thank you, Jesus, for returning laughter to my life.

I went to a funeral today.  It was for my Aunt Mag.  She was 83 years old and one of the Godliest women I've ever known.  I loved her much.  Here are some of my memories.

As a child, I loved going to her house.  She lived a couple of hours away, but we visited often on weekends due to various circumstances during my adolescent years.  She had a pool where my shoulders were fried every summer for a few years in a row.  I remember sleeping in my cousin's bed with my sister and the clogged drain in the bathroom. 

Once, around the age of 8 or 10, I saw a book of Spanish lessons on her living room table.  I picked it up and was immediately enthralled.  I had had a few Spanish lessons on the television at school during 3rd grade and loved learning the language.  When I asked Aunt Mag whose book it was, she hesitated for a moment and then said, "Yours" and she smiled.  Oh my.  I cherished that book for a long time.  It meant so much to me during a time when gifts were few and far between.  Was the book really purchased for me?  Or was it a decision-of-the-moment from a woman who saw a child's wishful gleam in her eye?  I don't know.  I do know it was a gift from a loving, caring, beautiful lady who meant a lot to me.

I remember pointy gold house slippers, a closet full of beautiful clothes and a vanity covered with lots and lots of makeup just begging me to play with it.  I tried hard not to, but my sister and I had a very difficult time resisting.  We did just "touch" it a few times.  I remember elegant furnishings, a piano AND an organ in her house and, when I was very young, a color television. 

Aunt Mag was my "rich" aunt.  (It's very fun as a child to brag about your "rich" aunt.)  It used to puzzle me to no end when we'd visit her house for holidays and she'd freeze ice in milk cartons.  When it would get close to time to fill glasses at mealtime, out would come all the milk cartons from the freezer and someone would be directed to the back porch with the cartons and an ice pick to pound the ice out of them for tea.  I just couldn’t understand why in the world she didn't just send someone to the nearest gas station and BUY ICE!  My heavens, she could actually afford it!  That's for sure what I would have done if I were "rich".  :o)

But my most endearing memory is the time at church when, around the altar after service, Aunt Mag tearfully asked me if I had Jesus in my heart.  I must admit that, at the time, it wasn't a priority in my life and I gave a satisfactory answer to simply get the situation over with.  But I still remember it vividly 35 years later and have thought about it many, many times throughout my life. 

Someone actually cried real tears over the state of my soul. 

I don't recall that ever happening at any other time in my life.  My grandmother (her mother) comes in a real close second with the same loving question on a different day and a different place (her kitchen), but I don't recall the tears in her eyes.  I'm sure they had been there many times in her private conversations with God, but I just never saw them.

I saw my Aunt Mag's. 

To think that someone cared that much for me overwhelmed me to the point that I remember even today the love of Jesus extending from her to me as she asked that question.  I didn't see it then, but I do now.

As the years went by, we didn’t visit as often.  As an adult, I usually only saw my Aunt Mag each year at the family reunion.  I admired her love for the Lord, her beautiful laugh, her drive to get the job done (even if it was simply spreading the tablecloths and overseeing the food), and her zeal and love for life.  I missed all those things as Alzheimer’s took over her mind and body in her final years.  But she was always my beautiful Aunt Mag – to me.

Oftentimes over the years as a young wife and mother when faced with some kind of challenge, I would ask myself, “What would Aunt Mag do in this situation?”  Usually, I was directed to my knees in prayer as my priorities were straightened out in the presence of Jesus.  I feel very blessed to have had such a prayer warrior mentor in my life even though she never fully knew how much I admired and looked to her example whenever I was in need of direction.

At the funeral today, I was reminded of my “rich Pentecostal heritage” and I feel honored to be a part of such a heritage.  A heritage where a desire to be filled with more of the Holy Spirit is nothing to be ashamed of.  A heritage where tears are not to be hidden, but cried. 

Never underestimate the power of tears when praying for a loved one's soul. 

Yes, I DO have Jesus in my heart now, Aunt Mag.  Thank you for caring so much and for playing such an integral part in directing me to Him.

Lawsy mercy.  I love you. 

Love, Paula

I have these quotes hanging on the side of my bookcase:

"Imagination is more important than knowledge."  Albert Einstein

"If parents pass enthusiasm along to their children, they will leave them as estate of incalculable value."  Thomas Edison

"Of making many books there is no end, and much study wearies the body.  Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter; Fear God and keep His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man."  Ecclesiastes 12:12-13

"The virtues of men are of more consequence to society than their abilities, and for this reason, the heart should be cultivated with more assiduity than the head."  Noah Webster

What are your favorite quotes?

Paula

I was really hoping to get this recipe posted before Thanksgiving, but naturally I didn't.  Lyntley left a comment after I posted the Applesauce cake recipe and said she'd be interested in the pecan pie recipe with maple syrup, so hopefully it's not too late!  Christmas is coming up and it's good for that, too! 

Pecan Pie

1 unbaked 9 " pie shell, chilled
2 T butter
3 eggs
1/2 c honey (or a little less)
1/3 c maple syrup
1 t vanilla
1 1/2 c broken pecan pieces

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.  Melt butter and let cool.  Beat eggs, then beat in honey, maple syrup and vanilla.  Add cooled butter and nuts.  Pour mix into pie shell and bake 10 minutes at 400, then reduce heat to 350.  Bake for an additional 25 minutes, until set, but not dry.  Cool to room temp before serving.

It's good!

Paula

AMAZING FREEDOM 2007!

I went to Women of Faith this past weekend and was blessed yet again with The AMAZING Gift of Laughter.  Oh, my goodness, did we laugh.  Patsy Clairmont is the funniest woman over 65 on the planet.  Anita Renfroe is the funniest woman under 65 on the planet .  And the other speakers all ran a very close second! 

I'll be cracking up every time I hear "You Raise Me Up" from now on until the day I die. 

A good time was definitely had by all.

Paula

It's time to talk about something else.

I've been on a quest over the past couple of years to make desserts with more natural sugars, such as honey, maple syrup, raw sugar, etc.  Lately, I have been making a variation of this applesauce cake and it's been great with the weather turning cooler and more Fall-ish.  To give credit where credit is due, I found this recipe at www.honeyflowfarm.com.

Spicy Honey Applesauce Cake

1 c honey
1/2 c butter
2 eggs
1 t vanilla
1 c applesauce
1 t cinnamon
2 c flour
1/2 t salt
1 t baking soda
1/2 t nutmeg
1/4 t powdered cloves
1/4 t ginger
1 c nuts

Cream honey and butter.  Blend in eggs, vanilla and applesauce.  In separate bowl, combine dry ingredients, then stir gradually into creamed mixture.  Add to a greased 9 x 13 pan and bake at 325 for 25-40 minutes.

My variation is that I canned a BUNCH of pearsauce this year from pears given to me by neighbors of my parents, so I used my home-canned pearsauce instead of applesauce.  We use local honey bought from a local beekeeper, and pecans (puh CAHNS) from our own front yard - they're flowing out of the trees this year!  I feel very thrifty and down home when I'm able to use ingredients secured from somewhere besides the local Super WalMart.    The original recipe called for 3 eggs, but I put down only 2 because I'm presently using a small toaster oven and can only make half a recipe, so I use 1 egg for half the recipe.  I think 2 for the whole recipe would be plenty, but you can use the 3 if you prefer, of course.  Also, I have no idea why they give such a wide range for the baking time, but it takes around 45 minutes at 350-375 in the toaster oven.  Yours, of course, will vary. 

I have a very good recipe using maple syrup to sweeten pecan (puh CAHN) pie, too!  I'll post it closer to Thanksgiving for anyone who might be interested.

I hope you're having a wonderful day! 

Paula

Within the last week, some very nice things have happened to me.  First of all, my way to the Women of Faith conference this coming weekend has been paid in full by my church or some wonderful person - I don't know which. 

Also, a friend slipped a $20 bill into my purse on Friday so I could take my kids to Burger King with the rest of the Friday Homeschool Enrichment crowd.  (She had apparently noticed that we don't do lunch after enrichment very often with the group and she wanted to bless us.)

And to add even more blessings - during that same lunch, another mom asked me if it would be okay if she took my daughter with her and her daughter (best friends) to the dollar store for some things to help fill the Christmas shoe boxes that the kids are doing at our church this year.  She said she'd give them each $10 to buy some things to fill the shoe boxes with.  I said, yes, of course!

My first reaction to all these kinds of blessings is usually - Lord, why must my family be so pitied?  (Is my humanity showing here?)  But this time, immediately after that thought came this one - Paula, your friends are not showing you pity, they are showing you love.

Oh, thank you, Father, for helping me put it all in the proper perspective.

Paula

This is a quote from Tuesday's My Utmost for His Highest.  (Sorry for the odd layout.  I just did a cut-and-paste from my email account.)

--------------------

How are we going to get the
life that has no lust, no self-interest, no sensitiveness to pokes,
the love that is not provoked, that thinketh no evil, that is always
kind?

The only way is by allowing not a bit of the old life to be
left; but only simple perfect trust in God, such trust that we no
longer want God's blessings, but only want Himself. Have we come to
the place where God can withdraw His blessings and it does not affect
our trust in Him?  (bold, italics and underline - mine)

--------------------

Wow!   How many of us are there yet?  (My hand is trying to go up.)

"...Oh, for grace to trust Him more."

Paula

All to Jesus I surrender;
All to Him I freely give;
I will ever love and trust Him;
In His presence daily live.

I surrender all, I surrender all
All to Thee, my blessed Savior
I surrender all.

"I have learned to be content..."  Philippians 4:11

How many of us grew up singing and quoting this song and Scripture?  I did, for sure.  I meant it, too.  Every word of both of them.  I sang the song and quoted the Scripture from the depths of my heart.

Until the fire of testing came upon me.  Until it was time to prove the words.  I stood strong for a time.  A fairly long time, considering how weak I found that I really was as time marched on.  Then I sank, and sank hard.  Walking on rocks gets exhausting after a while, no matter how strong a person is.  I thought my roots ran deep, until I came to the end of my roots.

A few years ago, I decided to make my Scripture goal - "I have learned to be content in whatever situation I find myself in" (my paraphrase).  Little did I know at the time that the Lord had that goal for me also. 

Over the past five years, we have left Middle Class America (albeit the lower end of middle class probably) and traded it for near poverty.  My husband was laid off from his job and has yet to recuperate.  He has started an insurance business (due to being unable to find other employment) and we live on small monthly commissions and a night-time cleaning job, in addition to a few hours I put in at our church's office.  We have moved into a house half the size of where we were (from 2000 sf to 1000 sf which includes my husband's insurance office), have lost all savings including retirement, our van burned up on the side of the road so we took out a loan for another one that we could barely afford, we have no health insurance except for the two youngest children who are on the state's insurance plan for kids, and are simply existing from day-to-day financially at this point.

Here is an exerpt from my journal back in December, 2003:

"I try so hard to lay it at the feet of Jesus, but fear gets the best of me.  I live in a constant state of fear these days.  I had a couple of hours of actual happiness a couple of days ago.  It was such a strange feeling and I really enjoyed it!  I was thinking I was on the road to recovery after these last two years and was about to begin feeling happy again...I'm bummed again now and just can't shake it.  Why can't I trust??  Why can't I shake this fear that controls my life??  I'm so tired and weary.  It's taking too long.  I want that happiness back that I was beginning to feel.  It was so good.  I know deep in my soul that the Lord is there and with us and will carry us through - is carrying us through.  But I'm just so tired."

The end of my roots.  Controlling, paralyzing fear.  I have learned to be content?  Hardly.  I only thought I had.  I surrender all?  Not on purpose, no-sir-ree.  I wanted it all back.

Here is another exerpt from a few months later in August, 2004:

"Thank You, Father, that I am reaching the point of thankfulness to You for Your teaching, for growing me deeper and deeper in Your love.  Thank You, Father, for being more concerned with my character than my comfort.  Thank You, Father, for taking my control from me.  Through this I've learned to hand control over to You.  Thank You, Father, for helping me to be content in whatever circumstances I find myself in ~ because You are there in the midst ~ in control.  Thank You, Father, for helping me see that I have never had reason to fear, for You have always been my Provider, my Peace, my Comforter, even when I've not been so sure of it.  Thank You, Father, because it's finally getting from my head to my heart.  This could not have happened without trials to the point of despair, without learning to give up control, without learning to be content no matter the circumstance, without learning, through trials, to rest in You.  It's all about You, Lord, it's all about You.

More of You, more of You.  I've had it all, but what I need is more of You.

We have lost all monetary crutches, and have gained ~ You!  We have no resources left to rely on ~ but we have You!  Our assets have been cut in half, and we are left with You!  You are truly all we need.  Your faithfulness endures forever!"

What a change over just a few months!  What caused the change?  Well, I guess my roots grew.  The trials, even though I was still in the midst of them - and still am - had not consumed me.  They had helped me grow. 

Andre Crouch's words:

"Through it all, through it all, I've learned to trust in Jesus, I've learned to trust in God.  Through it all, through it all, I've learned to depend upon His Word!"

Yes, I can sing those words now and know what they mean.  Because I've learned.  Have you ever noticed how Paul said, "I've learned to be content?"  Andre sang, "I've learned to trust in Jesus, I've learned to trust in God...I've learned to depend upon His Word.

I still have my moments (as in last week's blog post).  Most days, I've learned, but I am also still learning...

Please don't judge me for my periodic lapses.  It continues to be hard, and harder still to continually present it as a prayer request to others in my circle who have heard it all several times before.  

"I have learned to be content..." is still my Scripture goal and will continue to be for a very long time, because it's a goal that travels a very long, hard road before the finish line of accomplishment can be reached.

I pray God's blessings on the road you're travelling today, too.

Paula

Today I have been depressed.  Very, very, extremely depressed.  This has been an on-and-off thing over the past five years since we began walking the difficult road of what can only be described as near poverty.  I will save the sad details for another day, but after five years, I can tell you that it begins to feel like something similar to what a chronic pain sufferer must feel on a daily basis. 

At first, people are sympathetic.  After all, you are going through a devastating time.  The Lord gives people *a word* for you.  Friends listen and sometimes slip you some cash, sometimes a lot of cash.  The church prays and intercedes and cares deeply. 

But after a while, it all dwindles down.  Other people's lives go on.  Yours, however, still seems to move very slowly.  I don't mean to imply that people no longer care deeply.  I know they do.  But it becomes very difficult to bring yourself to constantly give the same story over and over and over.  After all, it's been five years!  Shouldn't my husband be making some kind of decent living again by now?  After all, he's able-bodied, not injured or disabled or anything *understandable* like that.  The explanations start sounding like woe-is-me complaints.  So you just stop giving them and start saying "Fine!  Doing well!" when people ask how things are going these days.  It's just easier than saying the truth.  You don't want to alienate friendships with the never-ending downers, so you paint on the smile and lie through your teeth.  Sometimes you try and slip in that it's still painful and hard, just to test the waters and see how folks may respond.  The glazed look gives the obvious answers.  Either they don't understand what you're trying to tell them, or they're embarrassed about not knowing what to say.  Whatever it is, it's not worth your own embarrassment that you've just exposed yourself and gotten a blank stare (or diverted eyes) in return.

So anyway, I was having one of those horrid days earlier today where nothing was good and all was bad.  It is a paralyzing kind of emotion that curls you up in the bed and accepts no comfort from anyone. 

However, the Father has been merciful (I actually prayed for mercy today - and have received it) and I am better this afternoon.  I say merciful because in the past, I simply lived in the depression.  It was not something that fell on me in the morning and dissipated by the evening.  It permeated every moment of my life - for months.

And that is where The Gift of Laughter portion of my title comes in.  I wrote in my journal in November, 2006 (last year) these words:

"Thank You for laughter ~ the gift of laughter.  A gift is never more appreciated than when it is gone.  You have given it back to me and I worship Your awesome name for such an incredible, beautiful gift.  Your love for me is revealed to me everytime I am able to hear myself laugh again."

Indeed.  Amen.

I hope before this day is over, I find myself laughing deeply with my children.  Thank You, God, for your mercy toward Your child this day.

I have friends from one end of the spectrum to the other when it comes to the dating/courting issue.  Many a discussion on this topic has found me quietly listening on the sidelines because I didn't really know where I fell regarding this issue.  I'd read all the right the books and listened to the all the varying opinions.  I knew which side I *leaned toward*.  But what did I really believe regarding how my children should pursue relationships with the opposite gender?  Should we follow this set of rules?  Or that one?  Does this person's view of dating make sense?  Or does that person's view of courting sound better?  Oops, here's another viewpoint with a different set of rules regarding courtship.  Oh, dear, now what do we do?  Two different ways to court!  Uh-oh, I just read about another one - more decisions to make!  How many ways to go about all this is there anyway??

Well, our boys are 19 and 16, and we have an up-and-coming 10 year old daughter, so I've decided it's time I put some more serious thought into this topic.

(I know some may be thinking that I should have put more thought into it about 10 years ago.  Yes, that would be right.  Although, 10 years ago, my thoughts would have been different than they are now, so I'm sorta glad that I didn't waste all those brain cells back then.  I need them all right now.)

As we have discussed this topic in our household, and as we have been working our way through the Proverbs as a family lately, my husband and I have simply decided to direct our children beginning with this question - What's the wise thing to do?  The answers to this question are subject to our own interpretations, so every household's answers will probably vary at least slightly.  But in order to find the wisdom we seek, we must first ask the question and seriously pray about how it needs to be answered.

So here's what I'm thinking.  First of all, the labels have been tossed out the window.  We don't use the words *date* or *court* when we discuss this issue.  We just talk with our boys, and daughter if she happens to be within earshot, about the wisdom, or lack thereof, of pursuing a *beyond friendship* relationship with someone before they are able to actually take responsibility for the emotions, financial commitments, promises and luuuuv they would be professing.  If they, or the party of interest, are not yet able to fulfill these responsibilities and promises maturely and wisely, with at least the possibility of permanance, then what is even the point? 

Why toy with emotions when they have nowhere constructive to go?  Why begin a relationship when the pain of a breakup is most likely inevitable due to youth and inappropriateness of marriage at the time?  Why in the world do parents even encourage these things when they surely must remember their own pain from their early, immature years when they were caught up in this vicious cycle that almost always turned ugly before all was said and done?  Why have we fallen for the common concensus that all the pain of several different failed, immature relationships is good and necessary in order to eventually find the *right one* that we hope will last forever?  

I believe we must answer all these questions by going back to the original question.  What is the wise thing to do?  I'll leave the answer up to your family to answer.  We're also attempting to answer it here in our household as we travel down the road of life with our teenagers.

Fortunately, due to our tremendous parenting skills I'm sure, neither of our boys have yet become emotionally involved in a boy/girl relationship.  I do know that they have had their eyes directed toward the opposite gender and I'm fine with that.  It means they're developing normally and all is good and right in their thinking.

I pray in all seriousness that they are able to keep their thoughts and actions pure and respectful toward their female friends and that they will understand the need for maturity and at least a hint of life's direction before beginning an emotional relationship with a special young lady who eventually captures their attention in a way they can't ignore.

At which time, we will begin phase 2 of this process.  How to proceed after they are mature and financially stable enough to make a lifetime commitment.  Oh, wait.  Then they'll be mature enough to make those decisions without their parents.  Or will they? 

Stay tuned.  I don't have all those answers yet.  I found out a long time ago that all my well-laid plans tend to unravel at the point of application, so I'm not making any grand statements at this point.  But I do know one thing for sure.  If our children honestly want to know the wise thing to do, they'll ask for advice from those who have gone before them and have some wisdom to offer.  That would be us - their parents.  We're not out to pasture yet, my friends!  And we can't dismiss the example we are setting for them each and every day as we live out our marriage commitment in their presence.  By the time they are ready to walk down the phase 2 road, they'll hopefully have hearts full of wisdom gleaned from the two adults who love them most in the world.

I am well aware that I have not presented very many specifics here.  Every family is made up of a unique set of individuals, so every family is different in how they will make this particular issue work within their home.  But this is what makes the most sense to me here in this household.  If it sounds like we're flying by the seat of our pants, well, your wisdom is showing.  :o)

Father, you know I look forward to being a mom-in-law someday.  But until that time, keep our children's hearts pure and their eyes directed toward You.  That - without a doubt - is the wisest possible thing to do.

Well, it has been a while!

After it has been months since one has blogged, what does one say to flow back into the blogging world? 

Do I update on what life has been like, lo, these many months since I've been gone?  Do I simply begin again, never mentioning the lapse?  Do I re-introduce myself?  Or does it really even matter since I don't have a following anyway?    (I must say, I really don't like the slim pickins on the icons these days.  Am I doing something wrong here?  Are there no more to be found?  I miss the old icons!)

I am going to try and be more active here.  I do enjoy writing and journaling very much, but my time just seems to be pulled in other directions most of the time.  It takes major, uninterrupted, concentrated effort for me to sit down and blog and I don't seem to have many occasions to fit that kind of effort in!

Life is still plugging along and we will be starting up Official School again after Labor Day, per usual.

I'll be back with more riveting posts, just like this one, soon!  I hope!  Stay tuned.    (Stupid icon.)

A real bummer here.  My husband's office computer crashed last week.    It had been moving slowly for a few weeks and we kept talking about needing to back some things up.  We never did.  And then it crashed.

He has bought a new hard drive (which we could not afford but it's for work) and has gotten all the software, anti-virus stuff, etc. reloaded.  But he has lost all his form letters to clients, labels, etc. that will have to be re-written, and we can agonize for hours over those types of things to get them sounding the way we want them. 

The worst part of all is that he had written some poems on that computer that we had not backed up or printed off.  He was hoping to contact an editor to see if there was any possibility at all of getting them published.  We know there is probably not much of a Christian poetry market, but it was a dream nonetheless - a dream now shattered, or at least postponed.  Those poems were written from the depths of his heart and sometimes from the pit of despair as we have been going through some difficult times.  I thought they were quite good, although I realize I'm a bit biased.    Fortunately, some of the poems were on a free website we had set up over a year ago, so those are not lost.  And we had printed off one recent one (by God's providence I have no doubt) written about his father's death two years ago on January 10th.  He was able to send that one to his mom via email a couple of days ago on the anniversary of his dad's death and I'm SO HAPPY that one had been printed off so we had a copy of it.

Hopefully there will be more poems forthcoming - and those WILL BE backed up!!  But I'm still so bummed about the loss of the others that he had recently written.  They were so good.  I will miss them so much.

Paula

Just in case some of you click on my blog periodically to see if there's a new one, I'll just post real quick! 

We're having a wonderful month celebrating Christmas.  Our funds are extremely limited this year, so the bare basic minimums are being done.  This gives opportunity to relax and enjoy the season.  I'm having a great time listening to Christmas music, seeing all the lights and decorations around town as well as in/on my own home. 

Our oldest son (18) put up Christmas lights this year all by himself (with our 9 yo daughter helping, of course).  He did a fabulous job - better than my dh has ever cared or taken the time to do. 

Our church has blessed us again this year with some wonderful gifts for the kids and funds for our household.  We are so humbled by their generosity.  Hopefully, we will be able to repay some day by blessing other families within our church body (or outside of it) ourselves.  This time of financial stress has taken its toll and we are exhausted by it much of the time (it's been five years now since my dh lost his job and we've really been down a rough road since then) - but God continually shows us He's still taking care of us through the generosity of others. 

I hope everyone is having a wonderful Christmas season.  I do read many of your blogs every day (and some of you are as bad as me at posting very often!) and pray for many of you - more than I take the time to comment on your blogs. 

Love to you all,

Paula

Yesterday morning, it was mid-70's and clear.  This morning, it's 30 with freezing rain and snow.  I'll be serving a yummy pot of chili for supper tonight!

Remember a few days ago when I mentioned that my 18 yo son was playing Beethoven on his ipod?  Well, get this, he was mentioning to me some things he'd love to have for Christmas and guess what one of the things was?  A Tony Bennett cd.  Yes, you heard that right.  Tony Bennett.  I almost fell over.  Who has stolen my son??

It's just amazing how much time I seem to find when I decide to step away from the computer more often. 

Back on Tuesday, September 26, I posted a Tuesday Ten regarding what I'd do if I had more time.  I am pleased to announce that I have completed #1 - my recipe book is now organized and looking good. 

Only 9 to go...

Paula

My 9 yo daughter, the computer whiz, has a new blog.  She set it up herself,  put the pic up herself (not sure if I'm going to let it stay or not, though), and has figured out - on her own - a myriad of things that I can only dream about. 

I'm sure you can tell that she has two teenage brothers by reading about all her favorite things.    Feel free to visit and leave a comment or two.  She's been checking hourly...

www.homeschoolblogger.com/bunniesrock

Paula

On Thursday, 9 yo daughter and I went to a pumpkin patch with the local homeschool group.  We got to walk around the patch and pick our two favorite pumpkins to bring home; we watched a pumpkin shoot out of a cannon (twice!); and we explored a fire truck.  It was a fun hour and we were glad we went.  We brought our pumpkins home, put them on display in the living room and enjoyed looking at them.

Later that afternoon, I picked up the city newspaper and saw a group of elementary children from a local public school who had been at the same pumpkin patch earlier this week.  Underneath the picture of the kids in the newspaper, I read "P. Elementary students search the V. pumpkin patch Tuesday morning...The pumpkins were taken back to school where the students tested to see if they would sink or float, counted the ribs, measured the circumference and estimated and counted the seeds." 

Oh my.  So that's what I missed by not going to *teacher school*.  It never even occurred to me to use our new pumpkins as a learning opportunity.  What kind of homeschooling mother am I? 

My daughter saw the article, too, and sighed.  She remarked that if there is one drawback to being homeschooled, it's that public school kids get to do more fun experiments than we do.  Then I sighed.  I decided it was time to grab those pumpkins and get some learning done!  We played Will It Float in the kitchen sink and learned all about circumference with a tape measure, as well as a string and ruler.  We didn't count the ribs, though (*yawn* - she's 9 - boring!), nor did we estimate or count any seeds as we're not ready just yet to cut into them.  (Remember I wanted to simply enjoy looking at them for a while.)

So now we have officially *learned something* with our pumpkins just like the school kids down the road.  I feel so much better now.

Our 18 yo high school senior is not the typical clean-cut homeschool boy. He wears a long ponytail and loves to listen to music by classic guitarists from eras gone by such as Stevie Ray Vaughan, Jimi Hendrix, Jimmy Page (former lead guitarist for Led Zeppelin), Eric Johnson, etc. (And just in case you think I’m a *way cool mom-in-the-know*, I’ll tell you I had to do a google search just now to remember all those names.) He is a self-taught guitarist and spends hours trying to emulate his mentors. I used to stress when he’d wear his beloved t-shirts bearing the faces of one of those guys to church or a homeschool family gathering, but I finally decided I could be fighting bigger battles, so now I’m just thankful.

Anyway, on to my story. Today started out as a regular day. It was a good day with no bickering and we even had some nice thought-provoking conversation going among the four of us (me and three kids). It was a gorgeous day outside and we had the door and windows open letting in the marvelous weather. I was going about my normal routine when suddenly my son plugged his ipod into the cd player and said, "Mom, did you used to play this song on the piano?" (He knows I used to play classical music when I was young.) Well, I prepared myself to hear some guitar solo screaming out from the speakers and I already had my answer ready (No!), when lo and behold, to my utter surprise, I hear...get this...BEETHOVEN! He had downloaded BEETHOVEN onto his ipod and has been listening to piano and symphony music written by BEETHOVEN lately! I’m still stunned.

You have to understand - I pulled this boy out of public school when he was in 6th grade. He had a LOT of ps running through his veins for a long time. He was very resistant to anything remotely *schoolish* and a relaxed style of learning has been very beneficial for him over the past few years that we’ve been homeschooling. I am confident that he is learning much more than he would be if he had stayed in a ps environment.

At first, as a new homeschool mom, and even lately as a more veteran homeschool mom, I have tried, tried, tried to sneak in some classical music throughout our days at home. It has always been met with moans and groans from all three kids. (The other two are 15 and 9.) Since it was not incredibly high on my priority list of things to force, er, teach, I usually let it go after a concerto or two and all was well with life again.

I’m still in shock. I really can’t believe my son is listening to classical music - on purpose! All my badgering, er, teaching is beginning to pay off. It’s about time. He graduates in May.

My goodness...I used the words "alluded" and "expound" in my opening sentence in this morning's blog.  I was waxing eloquent for sure, wasn't I?  I think I'll go look those two words up in the dictionary - just to make sure I used them halfway correctly.

Paula

I have alluded to this in previous posts, but I want to expound on it today.

I suffered for years from headaches that I assumed were just cyclical due to the fact that it was usually fairly predictable when they would occur every month.  Because of this, I don't doubt that my cycle had something to do with them, BUT I am confident today that there was another trigger that was contributing significantly to them, also.

About a year ago, I decided to improve my family's eating habits and wanted to begin slowly knowing that if I dove into it full-force, I'd probably bail after a short time.  So I thought that first I'd simply omit as much MSG as possible from our diets.  I began reading labels and doing internet searches to find out the "hidden names" of MSG.  I quit buying canned soups and flavor packets of taco mixes, dressing mixes, etc.  I started making my own broths and salad dressings.  I did as much as I knew how to eliminate MSG from my household.  I am sure there is still much I could learn and I doubt that ALL MSG has been removed from my pantry shelves even today.  But an amazing thing has happened over the past year since I started all this.  My headaches have virtually disappeared!  I still have one periodically, and it usually does coincide with my cycle, but it is short-lived and not remotely as long and severe and miserable as it was for several years. 

Now, to continue my quest for healthier eating habits, I have also begun eliminating as many preservatives and pesticides from the foods I buy as I'm able.  I am trying to get to the point where we're eating foods as closely to the way God created them to be eaten as I possibly can.  An excellent book to read concerning all this is "What the Bible Says About Healthy Living" by Rex Russell, MD.  Maybe a bit controversial to some, but I love that book!

It is truly remarkable how much better I am feeling these days as compared to how I used to feel as I trudged through my days.  Of course, I am eating more fresh fruits and veggies which is a tremendous aid to my digestion and overall health, but it's just amazing to me how much more energy I seem to have, too.  I am thinking more clearly and my blood sugar levels don't drop as much as they used to where I would get the shakes and fuzzy thinking, etc. that accompanies that.

A couple of MSG websites are:

http://www.migraineweb.com/

and

http://www.truthinlabeling.org/index.html

Of course, there are many sites available for your perusal that will give alternate viewpoints.  So, if you're interested in all this, just do a google search and read up on other opinions, too.  But, for me, I am totally convinced that eliminating MSG from my family's diet has greatly improved my headaches and overall function. 

Periodically, we all (hopefully) read books that we can't help but recommend to all who will listen.  I love to read but have only three or four on that mental list that I love to tell people about.

I am re-reading one of them now with our church's small group that we're involved in for the next few weeks.  It is Authentic Faith, The Power of a Fire-Tested Life by Gary L. Thomas. 

It asks the question, "What if life isn't meant to be perfect but we are meant to trust the One Who is?"  The back of the book states, "As Thomas reminds us, faith is about something other than a smooth ride through this fallen world.  Rather, authentic faith is shaped, tempered, and purified in the flames of struggle."

I hesitate to gush over books when I recommend them to people because I know that gushing tends to give the new reader a bit of a letdown at the end of a book when there has been so much hype extended beforehand.  (At least that is my experience when books have been so highly recommended to me.)  Also, I realize that the Lord speaks to different people through different books and a book that ministered so much to me may not minister in quite the same way to someone else.

However, with all that said, if the description of the book tugs at something in you and makes you want to investigate further, then you would probably enjoy it as much as I am (the second time around)! 

I know they're available at www.christianbook.com and possibly even your local Christian bookstore.  The copyright is 2002. 

Prepare to be challenged in chapter 2 - Living Beyond Your Self The Discipline of Selflessness.  The whole book is a very good read!

Paula

If I had more time I'd:

1.  Organize my recipe book.  Since I've been changing my family's eating habits over the past year, I have recipes that I've printed off the net just stuck in my recipe book hither thither and yon.  It's a mess!  I can't find anything!  I need organization!

2.  Read This Present Darkness and Piercing the Darkness by Frank Peretti.  My 15 yo ds talked me into reading The Visitation a few weeks ago and I loved it!  I don't generally make the time to read fiction but, oh, how I wish I had the time for it on a more regular basis!

3.  File.  Blech.

4.  Figure out a way to make a good sandwich bread.  I'm going to start on this one soon.  Um-hum, sure.

5.  Put some of my journal entries over the past 4 1/2 years into some kind of readable form as a type of ministry to other women who need to just chill and stop fretting over things.    I have this art mastered now and need to share.  (Oops, did I just fib?)

6.  Clean my kitchen after every meal.  I really do enjoy a clean kitchen.

7.  Study organic gardening and make one.

8.  Make soy candles.  I've been reading up on this on the net and I think I can actually do it.  They say it's easy.  We'll see.

9.  Enjoy relaxing and listening to praise and worship music more than I do presently.

10.  Sleep.  (I have a cold right now and a good night's sleep seems just heavenly.)

Diversity, Acceptance, Tolerance - words some people like to use these days to be politically correct and patriotically American.  But when we add the word Grace to the mix, we must naturally turn the conversation to a much different scenario...the sometimes exciting, sometimes downright scary local Christian homeschool support group!  

[Small disclaimer:  This blog entry is intended to be generic without finger-pointing at any particular people or group of people.  Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental - in case some of my dear, beloved, full-of-grace support group friends happen to be reading this.  ]

In many local Christian homeschool support groups, you will find yourself involved with a very diverse group of families.  Some have lots of children, some have only one.  Some don't watch television, movies or play video games, some do all of the above with regularity, and still others watch and play on a limited basis.  There are varying degrees of what types of movies, tv shows and video games will be watched and played depending on the household.  Some families are very involved in church youth groups, some don't do youth groups.  Some families go to various denominational churches, some home church.  Some home birth.  Some follow rigid schedules each day, some just go with the flow.  Every homeschool family that does not live in my home is DIFFERENT than mine.

So how far do we go out of our way to connect with those homeschool families that are different than ours?  If we tend to be more liberal with what we allow our children to watch, do we look down on those who put a tight reign on those things?  If we keep our children out of youth group, do we have a superior attitude toward those whose children attend their youth group?  Depending on whether we're more conservative or not-so-conservative, do we tend to exclude the others from our little circle?  Do the unschoolers visit on one side of the room while the MOTH users visit on the other?

It's been a while since I've blogged!

We started "school" back up the day after Labor Day as we do every year.  We are working hard to get oldest son graduated this year.  It will be a chore since academics is his least favorite subject.    He's a good boy. 

Our middle son hasn't shown the slightest interest in anything schoolish either so far this year.  He just obediently (for the most part) goes through the motions and makes me wonder what I could be doing differently in his studies.  I'll keep working on it.  Surely there's something out there to actually hold the interest of a 15-year-old boy.  I don't like just going through motions, especially since it means there's really not a whole lot of real learning going on and his time could be better spent on other things in other areas.  I do believe I'll come up with something...I've just got to keep praying and thinking about it.  He's a good boy. 

Our daughter is in FOURTH GRADE and it's just unbelievable.  Wasn't she just born yesterday??  I suppose maybe it's time to pick up the speed on her studies, too.  But she's just a sponge and can't wait to learn new things every day (almost).  I think I'll give it another year (or two) before I start in with the formal studies.  I do enjoy watching her pick and choose the areas she is interested in and running with them.  Forced learning at this point would definitely take some light out of her eyes and I really don't want to go there right now.  She's a good girl. 

Life is a bit frustrating for us these days with my husband's business still not providing much income.  Will it ever end?  It seems like we'll be in this situation forever at this point, but time moves on and I know that's really not going to be the case.  So I'll hang on to that thought - as well as prayer and the knowledge that God is in control and I really have nothing to fear.  The road is rocky, though, and hard, and seemingly endless these days. 

Thank You, Lord, that Your Word is true and good and loving.  Thank You, Lord, for the peace You offer during these hard times.  Help me to accept that peace and rest in it.

We all have our reasons why we decide to homeschool all the way through high school or to send our kids to public or private school when they get to the teenage years. 

For our family, I just simply cannot imagine raising our children any other way.  We pulled our two boys out of public school during the middle of 3rd and 6th grades.  Our daughter wasn't old enough to be in school yet. 

We saw our oldest son, now 18 years old, begin a downward spiral around 5th grade that was going to soon overwhelm him and was convincing him that he was neither smart nor capable of doing things the "normal" way.  Well, hmm, we have come to the conclusion he will never do things the "normal" way.  Good for him!    He is who God created him to be and I'm very proud of him.  He does not fit in with the youth group at church or even very comfortably with the homeschool group of kids here in our area.  He tends to be a loner and loves the great outdoors.  His music of choice makes many homeschool moms cringe.  Jazz and the Blues music fills our home these days.  What will it be next month?

His long ponytail confuses many who know us as homeschoolers.  (Where's the clean-cut boy that we see on the cover of all those homeschool magazines?)  He lifts weights and has recently found a renewed interest in basketball.  But there's another side to him, too.  The side who considers Francis Schaeffer a genius and has read most of his books and watched his videos and has yet to tire of any of them.  The side that reads and studies the worldview of C. S. Lewis beyond the Chronicles of Narnia series.  The side that watches the old 1950's Moody Science videos and and actually enjoys them.  The side that dreams big dreams and believes they will all come to pass some day.  I just love that boy.  I really and truly cannot imagine sending him off to sit in classrooms listening to lectures designed to fill up exactly 50 minutes - all day long - every day.  And then having to do homework every evening besides all that.  When would he have the time to learn all about the complex person God is creating him to be?

Our next son will soon be 15 years old.  That child could sit in front of a Gamecube 20 hours every day.  (But he doesn't!)  He loves Tolkein and Peretti and is excited about getting started reading Ted Dekker books.  He is outgoing when comfortable with friends, yet cautious when forming new friendships.  He thinks deep thoughts and insists that when he thinks about eternity, he gets a headache.   He loves doing things in an orderly fashion and enjoys reading his Bible that way, too - beginning in Genesis and ending at Revelation.  His theological questions are too deep for Mom and are usually referred over to Dad.  I am thoroughly enjoying watching him grow and becoming the man he will be someday.  

The difference between our two sons is night and day.  But they are friends - most days.  They laugh and carry on like two brothers who enjoy each other's company.  They learn many things from each other and are not even aware of it.  Why would I even consider splitting them up and sending them out of the house going their separate ways - every day?  Knowing their friends better than each other?  LIKING their friends better than each other?

I am thoroughly enjoying teaching our 9 year old daughter.  I have taught her from the beginning and she is an absolute JOY!  She loves learning and has devoured the Lord of the Rings books as well as many, many others during the few short years that she has been reading.  She also is learning from her brothers unaware of the vast amount of knowledge she gleans from them as we all go about our days here at home.  I am so very excited at the prospect of teaching her all the way through her high school years also. 

Now, FYI, we do have our down days.  Our bad days.  Our very teary, overwhelming days where we all wonder why in the world we are all together in this little house we live in, day in and day out, every stinking day of the world.  I sometimes stress over how my boys will make a living supporting a family.  I wonder how we're going to get everything learned that needs to be learned.  Will algebra EVER be conquered?  My kids don't know a foreign language!  Then I remind myself the Lord's hand is on my children and I simply need to trust.  Trust.  And rest...in His Word:

"The Lord will fulfill his purpose for (Ryan, Colin and Rachel)." Psalm 138:8

"The one who calls (Ryan, Colin and Rachel) is faithful and he will do it." I Thess. 5:24

His Word is Truth!  And I will believe that Truth - all the way through high school.

I have a 2-ring index card holder that I have started putting Bible quotes in.  It has not been very active since I have just not put much time into it and there's not much there right now.  But as I was thinking about what I would do to encourage some family members in a difficult situation, I was thinking about simply pointing them to Bible TRUTHS.  They are listening to so many outside voices - their own, their friends and family members, and Satan's himself, I do believe.  I came up with a very original saying to put on the front cover of my index card holder that says, "Out of all the voices calling out to me, I will choose to listen and believe THE VOICE OF TRUTH."  Catchy, don't you think? 

I am going to put in the very, very, very front this Scripture:

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  This is the first and greatest commandment."  Matthew 22:37, 38

My reasoning for putting this one very first is that without the Lord God being the love of our lives - the very essence of all there is to us - no other truth will hold proper focus.  Revelation 2:4 says, "Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love."  Until I get this TRUTH - my love for Him-whom-I-can't-even-begin-to-fathom-nor-describe - down into my very bones, I will not be able to lay hold of all the other wonderful TRUTHS in the Word.

I will then begin adding TRUTHS to my index card holder as they come to me and as I need specific ones to stand on in different situations.  I already have a few that are beautiful nuggets that the Lord has given me that have spoken peace, security and love to my soul.

I am very excited about this way of understanding that we do not simply read and memorize "Bible verses", but they are TRUTHS in the midst of all the other voices that speak to us all around where we are.

I know this is not a new revelation.  I have heard Beth Moore talk about the way she does this and, of course, my blessings on Casting Crowns for their awesome talents they give to the Lord and for blessing us with a beautiful song about TRUTH.  I can't wait to get started!

May God bless you all today,

Paula

Well, I don't seem to be doing so well keeping up this blog.  I tend to need a lot of "think" time when I sit down at the computer to do these types of things.  Thoughts don't come quickly for me when I'm writing, so I put it off and put it off and put it off due to someone always needing something from Mom.  But right now I think I'm good for alone time in the next few minutes, so here goes.

I haven't yet really given a good description of me...

I'm 46 years old and have been married to my hubby for almost 24 years.  We have three children, ages 18 and 14 1/2 (sons) and 9 (daughter).  We've been homeschooling for about 5 1/2 years now. 

My days are busier than I like them to be.  I work only 12 hours per week in our church office, three mornings a week, but it seems to really take a chunk out of my time.  My husband has started a new insurance business (forced into it due to unemployment for over a year) so he needs help in the office, too.  Fortunately (and very oddly) the office is in our home at this point, so I'm always here when he needs me to cover the office and phone.  He works evenings four night a week cleaning offices, to cover our monthly expenses until the business gets going good, and gets home late, so we all tend to be night owls and late risers.  He's in his office, just a few steps from the bedroom, by 9 a.m.  I am at the church by 8 a.m. on the days I work, so I'm up the earliest.  The kids sleep in and I don't like it one bit.      But life's been worse, and I'll be fine.

Another thing that takes up a lot of my time these days is my new-found love for healthy cooking.  I am cooking almost everything from scratch these days and buying organic as much as possible.  My food budget, believe it or not, has not risen that much.  A year ago, I spent so many days with a headache, I just could not get in the kitchen to cook, so we ate fast food way too often.  That's just the way I lived and thought it was going to be that way forever.  Well, I decided at first to just begin limiting the MSG in our diets.  I quit buying canned soups first of all and started reading labels.  I have an on-line friend who is working toward her doctorate in Naturopathy and she has been a tremendous aid in answering all my crazy questions.  Lo and behold, a few months later, my headaches started disappearing!!!  I am almost headache-free at this point and that is awesome.  I have made so many, many food changes over the past few months since I've started feeling better.  Since I had so much fast food expense each month (and lots of MSG in those meals - a vicious cycle), our food budget is still not "low" but it has remained pretty steady and I feel 100% better to boot!  Considering the fact that we're just now climbing out of poverty level (due to my husband's unemployment for so long and now starting a business from the ground up), we're doing pretty good!  I firmly believe that for many people, organic and healthy is doable.  It's just a new mindset and way of doing things and LOTS and LOTS of extra time in the kitchen, and shopping all over town, and doing internet research, etc.  But I am so glad I took that initial step last year to simply limit MSG.  I firmly believe the Lord led me in that direction (in hindsight) so that I could feel better and start feeding my family better.  I have changed my way of cooking almost 95% and am feeling good!

And, of course, in addition to all that - I homeschool my kids. 

The Lord is so good, and I am so blessed.

Well, it's summer and the kids are spending time at Grandma and Grandpa's house with cousins.  I've got a quiet week here at my house with my husband working at home during the day and going to his second job at night.  Right now this evening, I'm all alone. 

Wow, alone with my thoughts and no one to interrupt.  I can actually complete a whole sentence in my head.  How cool is that!  I'm going to enjoy it while I can and welcome my kids back later next week with wide-open arms.

"Father, I bless Your Holy name tonight.  I serve an awesome God and I love you so much.  Thank you for friends, work, children, home and security that only comes from You."

I want to thank Cheryl, aka blessedmom3, here on homeschoolblogger for checking on me to make sure I'm okay after my last post about three weeks ago.  What an awesome joy it was to see her email and Scripture verse and know someone had been thinking about me! 

Emotions go up and down periodically, but overall I am well and life is good.  My husband has started a new career, a new business actually, and we are starting over in life at a time when we had thought we would be settled and secure.  God has a way of upsetting apple carts!  But we are learning and growing and life is beginning to turn around for us again.  We feel so blessed that He loves us so much that He grows us and teaches us and stretches us beyond all we could ever imagine.

And...that He sends people to check on us to make sure all is well!

Thank you, thank you, Cheryl.  I pray you are well, too!  

I really, really do.  My heart is so full, but I cannot write what is there.  I find myself so envious of those who write so beautifully.  Their words lift me up and encourage me.  Thank you, Father, for knowing my heart and offering me Your peace.  Help me to accept it and rest in You today.

Well, my 8 yo daughter and I planted a container garden this week.  We now have 28 pots full of tomatoes, various peppers, strawberries, cilantro, and basil.  It is our second year and I hope we get tons!  Last year, we didn't do so well.  It was our first year to EVER plant a garden and we were winging it.  Actually, we're winging it againt his year, but trying some new things with the soil so...we'll see.

I would love, love, love to have enough tomatoes to can or freeze for several months (good luck this year - not enough planted!) so I don't have to spend so much on canned tomatoes at the store.  I'm doing my best to change my family's eating habits by cutting out the preservatives (as much as possible), making bread, cooking from scratch, etc.  It's a long road for me and I'm asking a ton of questions to every person I know who is doing what I'm doing.  I think I'm a nuisance, but I want to know! 

I made my first food co-op order this week and I'm so excited!  I ordered hard white flour, basmati rice and apricots.    I am trying very hard to figure my budget (which leans along the lines of WalMart, not the health food store) so I can do better in the kitchen with healthier foods.  Cutting out all the junk will help tremendously. 

My family is not too fond of my newfound venture, but they seem to be coming around a little bit at a time.  They don't seem to be asking for fast food quite so much as they used to and we can actually eat some homemade hamburgers without them boo-hooing for soft drinks.  Progress!  I DO allow soft drinks for homemade pizza, though.  There are just some things that are very difficult for this mom to give up.

It's an exciting road for me and I can't wait to see where it leads!

Have a great day everyone.

Paula

I am not quite sure yet how I want to go about this blogging business, so I'll just start out with some information about my blog's title and see how it develops over time.

The title of my blog is Come...and Rest.  Of course, this is based on the Scripture that says, "Come unto Me all you are weary and heavy-laden and I will give you rest." 

I was once a world-class worrier.  My husband tells me that when I didn't have anything to worry about, I would make something up.  He was right.  I had to have something to fret and wring my hands over.  I was in a continual state of un-rest.  But...I have come to a place of rest now and am content in this place most of the time.  What a change!  What an awesome place to dwell!  How awesome to rest in the arms of our Lord and allow Him to take care of my troubles and woes. 

The journey has not been easy.  The fruit has been borne through trials, sometimes to the point of despair.  Apparently, I was not an easy student to train.  It took me a while.  But God is good to continue to press in, even though the road is not easy.  Even though we may wonder where He has gone.  Did He leave us all alone?  The rocks in our path make it difficult to *look up* because our gaze is continually drawn down as we try and steady ourselves.  But He is patient.  He waits until we are ready to give it ALL over to Him.  And then the most amazing thing is revealed.  He's been there the whole time - even during those times we thought He had surely left us to carry our burdens alone.  His arms are amazingly comfortable to lean into and rest in, fully content in knowing He's got our problems and stresses and trials all under control - His control.

I pray your evening is a blessed evening and that you are able to rest in Him tonight.

Well, there's surely a first time for everything.  I am so excited to be blogging!

Hmm, what to say?  Thinking, thinking...

Still thinking...

Maybe just setting up the site was enough for today.    I'll be back soon.  :o)