Aug. 2, 2007 - A Love/Hate Relationship

I'm still trying to decide if I want to keep this thing.  So many others have left for other blogging arenas, and I'm just not quite brave enough.  I really don't like have my life flashed across the internet, but then again, there is that insecure part of me that wants to put myself out there to see if there's anyone else like me, or, in case any friends happen by, they can see what's really going on inside my head.

The thought occurred to me to start over fresh (hence the new title up there)...to throw myself out there with no identity, no friends, and no connections.  When I read back over my previous (and long ago) posts, I couldn't delete them.  After all, it was a part of my life, a peek inside my head, something to look back on when I wonder what I was going through at the time.  For a possibly temporary compromise, I have taken those entries and made them viewable, supposedly, only by me.  Then I will either decide to hang on to the newly revamped blog, or trash it all and start a new one.

As is obvious, I have a hard time keeping up with this thing.  Sometimes it's hard being anonymous (which is the way I prefer it), but for the most part, I have no time.  I am dedicated to homeschooling my children, spending time with my husband, and emailing a dear friend each evening.  For now, a blog simply does not fit.  Plus I'm not like everyone else, and I don't necessarily want to fit in.  I don't say that in a rude way, or even matter-of-fact...it just happens to be where I am right now, and is, in my opinion, one or more less plates to juggle.  So more in the future....maybe.