Proverbs 31 Devotionals

• Feb. 8, 2009 - Trashy Love

Trashy Love

One day while running errands with my mother, I mentioned something to her about some girls I knew who dressed so trashy. As Rachel sat in the back seat of the car, listening to our conversation, she said, “Mom, how are you better than them when you talk about them like that?” Busted!

Just as these girls dressed trashy, I was being trashy with my love toward them. How often do we offer trashy love to others?

Instead of patience, we offer impatience.

Rather than being kind, we choose to be rude.

When we should rejoice in God's blessing to someone else, we become envious.

Rather than having a humble attitude, we become puffed up and proud.

It seems that our motives are often self-seeking, instead of seeking the good of others.

While true love isn't supposed to be easily angered, it seems that our temper can flare up in an instant.

We aren't supposed to keep a record of wrongs, but when someone ruffles our feathers, we can quickly recite a list of wrongs done to us by this person.

Love is supposed to protect. Yet, how many times do we hang up the phone, only to call two or three people and share something that was told to us in confidence?

Love is supposed to persevere, yet we live in a society that believes in giving up as soon as some problem arises. People file for divorce. People stop serving in the church when things they get their feelings hurt. We quit attending church because we were offended by someone. We would rather not learn about perseverance.

Excuse me now. I think I need to be washed by the Father for some trashy love that I have offered to others.

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• Nov. 10, 2008 - Balcony Seating

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Balcony Seating

When our high school girls’ basketball team went to the state finals several years ago, we bought tickets from some fans of the losing team so we could sit closer to the floor for the evening game. When we arrived, someone else was sitting in our seats. We showed them our ticket stubs, proving the seats were ours and they moved to higher seating.

We allow people who are close to us to take a front row seat into our lives. We discuss personal things with them because they have earned that privilege. Occasionally, we will have individuals who expect front row seating in our lives. Yet, we see the need to put up some boundaries and quickly send them to the balcony of our lives.

For instance, I know a lady who feels the need to frequently tell me that I need to have more children. This woman has a proven reputation of being a busybody, so I quickly move her to balcony seating. The Word speaks against the behavior of being a busybody. (Second Thessalonians 3:11) I choose to stay away from her so that her bad company does not have a chance of corrupting my character. (First Corinthians 15:33)

I had a close friend who began to make foolish choices. After investing a lot of my time and energy on her, I saw she was choosing to continue in her foolish choices. After confronting her on the issues, I chose to move her to the balcony, for a companion of fools suffers harm. (Proverbs 13:20)

If you are trying to watch your words, you may find it necessary to move some people to the balcony in your own life. If we continue to hang out with those who are given to obscene language, foolish talking, and coarse joking, we will have a much harder time breaking that cycle in our own lives. (Proverbs 4:24; Ephesians 5:4)

Perhaps you have a friend who is constantly speaking negatively about her husband. It is so easy fall into the trap of adding your own negative thoughts. Yet, by doing so, you will find it difficult to respect your husband. (Ephesians 5:32) Rather than doing him good, you will likely resort to nagging. (Proverbs 19:13; 21:9, 19) It is time to move this person to the balcony so you can focus on developing the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. (First Peter 3:4)

Because I know several women struggle with setting boundaries, I want to give one more example that may hit very close to home for many of you. Sometimes we need to move extended family members to the balcony. If we have extended family members who cannot respect the way we choose to raise our children, and they continually belittle us in front of our children, perhaps it’s time to move them to higher seating. I recently had to do this with a family member. It has been very hard because I thought I had a very close relationship with this person, and often shared very intimate details of my life with her. However, she made it quite clear several months ago how little she thinks of me. I was devastated by her behavior. I have had to do much praying to be able to handle this situation in a godly fashion, especially knowing that my young daughter is closely watching because she was there when all of this transpired. The result has been that I no longer make the weekly phone calls to her, nor will I visit her. However, when there is a need to inform her of something, such as an upcoming clogging performance for my daughter, I will tell her, but I choose to keep the conversation very short. When there are family get-togethers, I attend, and I will speak to her, but refrain from engaging in any in-depth conversation. I still treat her with respect, yet at the same time, I have moved her to balcony seating.

Do you need to move some people to the balcony in your own life?

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• Oct. 3, 2008 - Merciful Mess

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Merciful Mess

I love sharing personal lessons from my life in hopes that others can learn from my mistakes. To me, it is a way to redeem those painful experiences, making all things work together for good (Romans 8:28). The story I share here was a huge “life lesson” to me. I gained much wisdom in regard to friendships after having gone through this experience.

Several years ago, a lady started attending our church. I kept hearing from other people how fast she was growing in the Lord, how awesome she was, and how on fire for the Lord she was. I thought, "I ought to befriend this gal. She sounds really neat!" That was my first mistake. I took someone else's word on this person, rather than seeking God's will on whether or not I should befriend her.

It turns out that this gal was into witchcraft. She was using her wiles and all kinds of manipulation on everyone in the church. She caused division in the church and basically destroyed our deliverance ministry. Had I not gotten wise to her devices, I think she would have destroyed my marriage with her lies.

Shortly after I cut off this unhealthy friendship, I read in Proverbs 12:26 where a righteous person is cautious in friendship. I also saw in the next chapter where a person who walks with the wise becomes wise, but if you are a companion of fools, you will suffer harm. I cannot begin to tell you how much I wish I had known these verses before I met this woman. I suffered MUCH harm because of I was not cautious in friendship.

We live in a world where people need mercy. For those who truly have a God-given gift of showing mercy to others, it can leave us vulnerable to being used or manipulated by others if we fail to counter mercy with discernment. I encountered this with the woman who was attending our church. While I was trying to show mercy to her, I was doing it on the say-so of other people. What I ended up making was a merciful mess because God had not called me to show mercy to this woman.

Many times, I think those who operate freely in the gift of mercy may feel like they need to befriend everybody they meet. Since we are to be cautious in friendship, it is clearly not God's will for us to be close friends with every single person we meet. We need to discern whom God wants us to have for our close friends.

When we choose to base our friendships on God's principles, it might stir up controversy from those who don't live by these principles. We may be accused of being judgmental, when in fact, we are simply being cautious in friendship. There is a huge difference between the two. Since bad company corrupts good character, we should earnestly desire God's will in our friendships (First Corinthians 15:33).

Are you making a merciful mess in any of your friendships?

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• Oct. 2, 2008 - Spiritual Hyenas

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Spiritual Hyenas

One behavior common in the animal kingdom is the arrival of hyenas trying to steal the prey from other animals. Rarely will you see a nature show portraying hyenas on the hunt for live prey. They let other animals do the hunting, the chasing, and the killing. They come along after the fact, in hopes of taking the food for which others have worked.

I have seen spiritual hyenas in the church. These hyenas are too lazy to “hunt” for spiritual meat, so they try to take it from others. Often times, they even demand that you spoon-feed it to them.

Spiritual hyenas are too apathetic to chase after God. They may show up at the altar and weep bitter tears, yet walk away unchanged because chasing after God is not something you do only on Sunday. A healthy spiritual diet requires that we pursue God on a daily basis. (Psalm 61:8; Proverbs 8:17)

Spiritual hyenas refuse to kill their fleshly desires. (Romans 8:13) They also refuse to fight spiritual battles. (Ephesians 6:10-18) They would rather prey on someone who is prayed up and ask them to fight the spiritual battle for them. Yet God says to put on the full armor of God so that you are able to stand against Satan’s schemes. (Ephesians 6:10) Notice that it does not tell us to find someone else to stand in our place against the devil.

When we allow spiritual hyenas into our life, the results are:

1. We are not giving to them from the overflow of God’s Spirit in us. Rather, they are stealing our spiritual food and we will quickly become spiritually depleted.

2. Not only do they steal spiritual food from us, they steal glory from God. If only they would seek the Lord for themselves, God would give them plenty of reasons to praise Him!

3. They begin to seek us instead of God. In a sense, we become God to them.

We are told to be very wise in the way we live, making the most of every opportunity. (Ephesians 5:15-16) When we are doing things which seem to be of a spiritual nature, we may think we are still using our time very wisely. However, spiritual hyenas are very sly and sneaky. Because of that, we must be careful to guard against them so we do not end up becoming unwise stewards of our time.

Have you become prey to a spiritual hyena?

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• Oct. 2, 2008 - Spiritually Used

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Spiritually Used

It is a noble thing for a woman to desire to model Titus 2:3-5. However, because a woman has a passion to minister to other women, she can easily fall prey to the tactics of a user. Women who are timid find it difficult to say “no” to a user. Women with strong personalities often find pleasure in being asked to share their opinions.

I met a lady whom I will call Betty. We hit it off very well, seeming to share the same values. We forged a friendship, attending some of the same classes, and even visiting each other on occasion.

I began to notice a pattern to our conversations. They seemed to revolve around the happenings in her life. She was constantly seeking my advice. When I would respond with scripture, she would quickly affirm my insights with comments like, “Oh, that is good,” or “I never thought of it like that.” Because I thrive on words of affirmation, I never seemed to notice that she rarely brought scripture into our conversations.

Several months later, Betty was faced with a difficult dilemma. Because of my desire to help women, I spent a great deal of time counseling her with a scriptural approach to her situation. A few times I even left messages for her, stating that I had some more information which she may find helpful. Those calls were always quickly returned. Yet on other occasions, she would rarely, if ever, return my calls.

One evening, I was quite stressed and in despair over a situation of my own. I knew Betty had faced this very circumstance, so I decided to call her. I left a message for her, leaving no doubt as to my frame of mind. I knew I could count on her to help me. After all, Betty was my friend. However, she never returned my phone call.

As I pondered and prayed about this, I realized that I was not being unreasonable in feeling that I deserved a return phone call, for true friends are kind to each other. (Job 6:14)

I also came upon the realization that some people are only friends with us if we give them gifts. (Proverbs 19:6) I had poured myself into Betty’s life, yet was not getting anything in return. I discerned that what Betty was doing was using me. She was seeking the spiritual food which I had earnestly sought so she would not have to be diligent in the Word herself.

By trying to be a Titus 2 woman, I had ended up becoming spiritually used, allowing her to use up my time, my energy, and my spiritual food.

The Word tells us that faithful friendships are refreshing. (Proverbs 27:9) A true friend sticks by you in good times and bad times. (Proverbs 17:17; 18:24) Real friends are like iron sharpening iron. (Proverbs 27:17) If you cannot say this is true of your friendships, perhaps you have also been spiritually used.

Take some time to evaluate your friendships. Have you been spiritually used?

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• Oct. 2, 2008 - Spiritual Enabler

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The Spiritual Enabler

In recent years, the terms “co-dependent” and “enabler” have become quite popular in dealing with people who are in dysfunctional relationships. These ideas have infiltrated the church.

For instance, we may fail to obey the Lord when He tells us to step down from a place of ministry. After all, if we step down, who will fill our shoes? The church needs us! We are spiritually co-dependent when we think God cannot find someone else to fill that place of ministry.

I went through a situation where a lady kept seeking me for advice. I spent a great deal of time talking with her on several occasions. I gave her clear-cut, scriptural guidelines. Yet, she refused to make the necessary changes. By allowing her to monopolize my time, I was enabling her – enabling her to take time away from my family and my priorities, not to mention enabling her to drain me emotionally, physically, and mentally.

I have seen a situation in church where a lady lies continually. Several people refuse to confront her lying ways. Doing so enables her to continue in her sin, whereas, loving confrontation may lead her to repent for her sins.

I think women fall into this trap too often because we have such a hard time saying “no” when we are asked to do something. Keep in mind that when we refuse to say “no,” sometimes we hinder God’s plan for someone else. Perhaps what we just agreed to do was really a job God had planned for someone else. Yet, we just got in His way.

Is there someone who seems to be drawn to you like a magnet, constantly needing spiritual advice? Perhaps they discern you are a person of the Word, so they seek you instead of the Word because they are too lazy to seek God on their own. By letting them continue in their behavior, we become enablers. We may also be co-dependent; for we may love the way they make us feel when they seek our wisdom. Often, one feeds the other. We enable the behavior because it makes us feel good to be needed.

David asked the Lord to search his heart. I think it is wise to ask the Lord to also search our relationships. Perhaps we will discover that we have become spiritual enablers.

Have you fallen into the trap of being an enabler?

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• Oct. 2, 2008 - One Anothers

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Relating to One Another

Several months ago, our pastor did a series on the "one anothers" in the Bible. I wanted to do a message on that topic, but relate much of it where many of us live on a daily basis as stay at home moms.

Col. 3:16 tells us that we are to admonish and teach one another. Maybe God hasn't called you to teach a Sunday school class. Even so, you can teach and admonish your children, or even ladies in the church who are looking for one to mentor them.

James 5:16 tells us to confess our sins to one another. When confessing our sins to another, we need wisdom to know who would be a trusting person for us to approach. I remember hearing about a man who was struggling with homosexuality. He approached a leader of the church. What he said in confidence was told to everyone. It's no wonder that this man has turned back to the homosexual community.

James 5:16 also mentions that we are to pray for one another. First, we need to be faithful in praying for those in our own household. We also need to remember to pray for others and maybe the best way to do that is to dedicate one day a week for lifting up the needs of others. Some of them may not have anyone else who will pray for them.

Rom. 12:10 tells us to honor one another above ourselves. This is a good practice to start in the home. It is good teaching for our children. We live in such a selfish, "me-oriented" society. It is good to make the choice to honor others above ourselves. While it is virtuous to practice this outside the home, it is more honorable to practice it in the home with those whom God has entrusted to our care.

Gal. 6:2 tells us that we are to carry each other's burdens. It goes on to say that this will fulfill the law of Christ. Which law? The one that says to love your neighbor as yourself. I saw this in action right after our town was flooded. It was incredible to see people setting aside their own agenda and going to help others who had lost so much.

I Thess. 4:18; 5:11, and Heb. 10:25 all tell us to encourage one another. Sometimes that may be in person. Sometimes it may be just a phone call. Another way to encourage is by sending a card or a note. When you send something, the person can read it over and over, and be encouraged each time they read it. We can practice this in our homes as well. A note in a child's lunch can mean so much to them as they go through hard times. A friend of mine discovered all of the notes which she had written to her son. He had saved them all, and she "happened" to see them one day while in his room. We can do this for our husband's as well. What about sending him a card to his work address? What about tucking away an encouraging note in his luggage as he prepares to leave town? If you don't know what to say to encourage him, just tell him that you will be ready and waiting for him when he gets home! That alone will speak volumes to him.

II Cor. 1:4 tells us to comfort one another with the comfort we have received. We don't have to use eloquent words. A simple hug, along with letting them know that you are praying for them will mean a lot. When I miscarried, the one thing I needed to hear was that it would get better, but no one told me. Now, when I see others going through things, I am able to share that with them, in hopes that it will help them. We can practice this with our children as well. When they have been betrayed by a friend (or a number of other scenarios), we can comfort them by sharing with them a time when we faced the same thing.

Col. 3:13 tells us to forgive one another. I can't stress the importance of this. Many years ago, I struggled with chronic colitis. I was on so much medication for it. As I began studying on deliverance, I found that I had a lot of unforgiveness in my heart, which had opened the door to the colitis. I had to forgive, not just because our Lord demands it, but I had to forgive so that I could live a full life again. I am thrilled to tell you that once the unforgiveness was gone, so was the colitis. It has been gone now for over 10 years. We need to be sure and ask for forgiveness from our children and our spouse, and to grant them forgiveness when they have done wrong.

We are to love one another. (I Jn. 3:11, Rom. 12:10, James 2:8) In I Pet. 1:22

we find that we are to love one another deeply, from the heart. We are to have a sincere (without pretense, genuine) love for one another. Many times it is easy to say, "I love you." What is often harder is putting action behind our words. Action means that we are setting aside our own agenda for the good of someone else.

Gal. 5:13 tells us to serve one another in love. This is a hard one for me when evening comes and I am so tired. I want someone to serve ME! But if I follow scripture, I must crucify my flesh once again, and serve my family in love, no matter how tired I am.

Eph. 4:31-32 tells us to be kind to one another. This is another one that needs to be practiced consistently in the home. I often find myself barking orders to my daughter instead of speaking kindly to her. I have been faithfully asking Father to help me to learn to be kind to my daughter in spite of how frustrated I may be with her.

Rom. 12:16 tells us to live in harmony with each other. In the Webster's Thesaurus, it mentions having an even balance. How many times do we disrupt harmony in our homes because we aren't living a balanced life? I saw this in my own life over the summer. Because I homeschool an only child, I try to get her involved in several activities over the summer. This year I found that I overdid it. There wasn't much harmony in the home because "If Momma ain't happy, ain't no one happy!" At the time of this writing, we have had two days of having to be nowhere. While I have been very busy over these two days, I have been happy, calm, and content. It has brought much needed balance and harmony to our home.

Eph. 4:2 tells us to bear with one another. In our homes, this might mean learning to listen to both sides of the story before making a judgment. It could also mean to discern whether something was done because of childlike immaturity, rather than defiance. As mothers, we run in an exhausted mode much of the time. It can be very hard to bear with others, when the "others" are those in our own home. In those times, we need to remember that God is right there, just waiting for us to call upon Him to help us.

Precious Jesus, You gave us such wonderful examples of how to treat others. Help us to put those examples into action in our own homes, then help us take them out to a lost and dying world. Amen.

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• Oct. 2, 2008 - The Rose Garden

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The Rose Garden

When you see a rose first budding, you are looking at it in its youthful stage of life. Only when it's fully mature, will you be able to see it in full bloom, capturing the beauty from the depth of its color. What causes the rose to bloom into a beautiful flower is the heat from the sun and the storms to water it. After the sun has provided much heat and the storms provide the water, it blooms, giving off a wonderful fragrance. We are to be the fragrance of Christ to our world. (II Cor. 2:15) Before we can be much of a fragrance, God requires that we go through heat and storms, otherwise known as the trials of life. When we actively look to God, trying to capture the lesson He is trying to teach us through those storms, we become a rose -- giving off the fragrance of our Christ to those around us.

You can't help but notice the thorns on a rose bush. One thorn may tear into another branch on the rose bush, destroying it. Many times, we will find that the thorns in other people may try to destroy us. While that can be very hurtful to us, we must also realize that we can't have beauty without enduring pain in the process. Gazing upon my Savior, I can't help but notice the pain He endured to become the Rose of Sharon to me. The fragrance of His love is unending. It lifts my spirit on the darkest of days because He never fails to remind me that just as He endured much pain to bring about something so wonderful, He will use the very pain I endure and make something beautiful from it. And sister, He will do the same for you.

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - Weightlifting

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Weight Lifting

One Wednesday night, Pastor asked if anyone lifted weights. One gentleman, who has a rather large belly, replied, "I lift my spoon!"

We are admonished in Gal. 6:2 to carry each other's burdens. We can probably think of several people who are carrying heavy weights right now. Why should we desire to help them?

Jesus left us an example when He wept with Mary and Martha over the death of Lazarus. (Jn. 11:35) When a friend is going through the loss of a loved one, we can cry with them. We can take a meal to them. We can remember to call on them in the days after the viewing and funeral are done. Now, some of us may be saying, "But I won't know what to say." Moses said the same thing, but it didn't excuse him from what God wanted him to do. If we just tell them that we were calling to see how they are doing and tell them that we care, it will speak volumes to them.

Jesus also touched the untouchable. (Mt. 8:3) When I was a new Christian, we had a foot washing at our church. I will never forget seeing one of the women approach another lady who would have been considered "untouchable" by many. This lady was partially retarded, she smelled, her clothes were too small and they didn't match. That left a profound impact on me. I'm not saying that we need to be looking for opportunities to wash everyone's feet, but there may be someone in your church who often gets ignored because they are "different." One way that you could "touch" this person is by sending a "thinking of you" card, or even a card at Christmas. Why not physically touch them when you greet them? It may be the only touch they have received all week. Think of how you would feel if nobody took the time to hug you, shake your hand, pat you on the shoulder, etc. I call those kinds of touches "God-touches."

He fed those who were hungry. (Mt. 15:35-38) The virtuous woman in Proverbs 31 leaves us a good example; she opened her arms to the poor and extended her hands to those who were in need. We can make the choice to buy a few nonperishable items when we shop, then once a month, drop them by a food pantry. Years ago when I worked at a bank, instead of tithing to the church from my Christmas bonus, I would go to the store and spend my tithing amount on food, then deliver it to the Rescue Mission, which serves food to the poor on a daily basis. Another thing we can do is to take a batch of cookies to new neighbors. They may not be physically hungry, but I am sure that they are "hungry" for some friendship in their new neighborhood.

Abigail leaves us a wonderful example. In I Sam. 25, we find that she is married to Nabal, whose very name means "fool." He was careful in living up to that name as well! When he refused to give food and drink to King David, Abigail found out about it. She was quick to see that the King's needs were met. Her intercession on behalf of this foolish man ended up sparing his life because King David was prepared to see that he was destroyed. Do you know any people who you would classify as foolish? What about the teenaged girl who was raised in church, yet she finds herself pregnant and unwed? Too often, we want to talk badly of her, as well as her parents. We aren't called to be judge and jury over their lives. We are called to love one another fervently. (I Pet. 1:22) We are told in I Jn. 3:18 not to love with words, but with actions and in truth. If you know of an unwed, pregnant teenager, it is going to do far more good to reach out to her and help her in a tangible way. Purchase some items for her, even if they are from garage sales. Throw a baby shower. Encourage her that she made the right choice to give life to her precious child.

In Mk. 2:1-5 we find the story of the lame man whose friends carried him and lowered him through a roof so that Jesus could heal him. We may not be required to physically carry a weight of this kind, but when you know someone who has been diagnosed with cancer or any other kind of terrible disease, you can "weightlift" by praying faithfully for them. (James 5:16)

Maybe you know of some people who are going through some trials, but you think that they don't need your help. Maybe they seem to be self-sufficient so you don't want to offer to help. Even our precious Lord asked for help. In Mt. 26:38, He told the disciples that His soul was overwhelmed with sorrow, and He asked them to keep watch with Him. In Jn. 19:28-29, He said, "I thirst." After they helped Him, by giving Him a drink, He was able to cry out those famous words: "IT IS FINISHED!" My prayer is that those words will encourage you to look for people who may need you to do some "weightlifting" on their behalf. You may never know this side of heaven how much your help meant to them. Your "weightlifting" may help them to do the impossible. I know that we can't do it all, but if we look around, we will surely find something that we can do.

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - The Warfare of Love

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The Warfare of Love

"Above all things have intense and unfailing love for one another, for love covers a multitude of sin (forgives and disregards the offenses of others).

I Pet. 4:8 (Amp. Bible) The KJV uses the term "fervent" love. In the Greek, fervent is translated "to be hot, to boil."

We need to have a love in us that is hot and on fire. Too often, our love appears as barely observable. Yet, Jesus told us that others would know we are Christians by our love for one another. (Jn. 13:35)

As I pondered on this truth, I thought of the many times that I have popped popcorn in the microwave. I can't tell you how many times I have burned my fingers, trying to open the bag. Needless to say, I drop the bag very quickly when I feel my fingers being scorched by the steam coming out of the bag. God wants our love to be so hot that we can literally scorch Satan - even before he has his day in the Lake of Fire.

In Mt. 24:12 (Amp. Bible) it says, "And the love of the great body of people will grow cold because of the multiplied lawlessness and iniquity." The church is the "great body." Even in this day and age, we can look at things that are taking place within the body of Christ and see that the love of many is already waxing cold. I know of a lady whose husband lost his job, where he was making over $150,000 per year. Where they used to be part of the "inner circle" in the church, now they are being scorned. Love has waxed cold in that church.

Look at the divorce rate in the church. Love in marriages is waxing cold.

Look at the children who are in rebellion, even in the church. Love is waxing cold. Have you noticed the materialism that is even creeping in to our churches? How often do we find ourselves falling into that subtle, but snaring trap? So many people in the body of Christ suffer from terrible "I" problems, always thinking of only themselves. Their love has waxed cold. So many people have found themselves in rather troublesome circumstances. It is so easy to be caught up in those affairs, and before we know it, our love toward others has waxed cold.

We need to be praying for God to help us to have an intense and unfailing love toward others, helping us to forgive the sins of others, and to disregard their offenses. It can seem overwhelming to try to walk in God's love all the time, but He encourages us that we can do all things through Jesus, who gives us strength. (Phil. 4:13)

Father, let our waking thoughts be turned toward You. Show us this day how we can be Your hands and Your love extended to those who will cross our path. Go deeper into our hearts and fill us with Your love. Let there be more of You and less of me. Amen.

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - Got Critics?

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Got Critics?

Doesn't it hurt to find out that others are criticizing you? I was pondering on this one night and decided to look in scripture at some of the many times where Jesus found Himself in the same place. Often, He saw His critics face to face while they were hurling their accusations.

He was accused of blasphemy. Mt. 9:3

He was accused of being possessed and of driving out demons by the prince of demons. Mt. 9:34, 12:24, Jn. 7:20, 8:52-53, Lu. 11:15, Mk. 3:22

He was criticized for working on the Sabbath. Mt. 12:1-2, Mk. 2:23-24, Lu. 6:2,6-7, 13:10-14, Jn. 5:16. I thought that it was interesting to note that in Luke 6:2,6-7 when Jesus was criticized by the Pharisees (leaders of the church), He went on to say in that same chapter to pray for your enemies and do good to them (v. 27-28). In verse 37 He says not to judge others or to condemn others. We will often have our own critics when we make the choice to put Christ first, spouse second, and children third. Even people in the church get their priorities wrong. Some tend to think that by putting church work first that they are putting Christ first. There are many who appear to be putting church above their families, and I have seen the chaos that has come into their lives because of these erroneous actions.

In Mt. 26:6-9, Mark 3:20-21, and Jn. 7:4-5, His own family criticized Him and said that He was "out of His mind." Jesus went on to say that a prophet is without honor in his own town. (Mt. 13:54-57, Mk. 6:2-3) Many times, we will find that our those closest to us won't understand how serious we are in our walk with the Lord. They will begin to criticize us. I have seen this in my own family, so I know how much it can hurt. Some of my family members say that I am brainwashing my daughter. That's odd - God's Word calls it "instructing her in righteousness." While reading about how the people in Nazareth were furious with Jesus, driving Him out of town, and hoping to throw Him off a cliff, I saw that Jesus "walked right through the crowd and went on His way." (Lu. 4:30) Father spoke to me and told me that as we walk His pathway, and we have critics who start talking so hatefully about us, He will enable us to also "walk right through the crowd" and go on our way.

In John 12:1-7 we find the story of Mary pouring expensive perfume and lavishing it upon the feet of Jesus. Judas was very critical of this action. Jesus said, "Leave her alone." Imagine the Master telling Satan to leave you alone. After I miscarried my first baby, I had months where I didn't read the Word because every time I did, I would start crying. I was tired of crying, and since the Word made me cry more, I quit reading. After I got through the most intense part of the grief, I was talking to the Lord. I asked Him why I didn't go through any condemnation from Satan for not reading the Word. He assured me that He doesn't put more on us than we can bear. I knew that He was telling me that when Satan wanted to heap condemnation upon me, Jesus told him, "Leave her alone!"

In Mk. 8:11 and Mk. 10:2, the Pharisees had come to test Jesus. Often, we will find that our own family members want to "test" us. They knew the person we were before Christ, and so they push and push, trying to provoke us. If they catch us in a weakened moment, and we fail to act in a Christian manner, we can count on hearing the words, "Oh! I thought you said that you were a Christian!"

In Mt. 8:34 we see that the people asked Jesus to leave their region after setting the demoniac free. When our lifestyles show a radical change because of our Lord's work within us, we may be asked to leave as well. It may not be said to us in those words, but we may find ourselves missing out on invitations to do things. People whom we considered friends will suddenly stop calling. Family members may act distant with you at family get-togethers.

In Mt. 21:23, they asked Jesus by what authority He was doing different things. Many people will not understand why you homeschool, why you don't work outside the home, why you don't get your kids involved in lots of different activities, why you don't let your children view certain programs, why YOU don't view certain programs, and the list goes on..... They are questioning your authority on different issues. When facing our critics, we must always remember that we are to serve our Christ, looking only for HIS approval, and not the approval of man. (Gal. 1:10)

Jesus told us that if people persecuted Him, they are going to persecute us. (Jn. 15:20) In Mt. 5:11 He tells us that we are blessed when we are persecuted because of righteousness. We are told in II Tim. 3:12 that all who live godly lives will suffer persecution.

While it's never easy to be persecuted or criticized, we are given some words of encouragement in scripture. I Pet. 4:14 tells us that if we are insulted because of Christ, we are blessed, for God's Spirit rests on us! Heb. 12:1-3 tells us that we need to run with perseverance the race marked out for us. We need to fix our eyes on Jesus, and not grow weary and lose heart. Heb. 11:27 tells us that Moses persevered because he saw Him who is invisible. When we are persecuted by those closest to us because of our stand for the Lord, may we also "see Him who is invisible." While facing those who may oppose us, may we sense His presence right there with us because He said that He would NEVER leave us, nor forsake us. (Heb. 13:5)

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - The Other Woman

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The Other Woman

Many times, we become so myopic with our vision. We are focused on our own personal tasks, whether it be for our job, our home, our family. We can miss out on those quality moments to minister to the 'other woman' who may be right in front of us.

Looking at the woman at the well, Jesus was likely tired and very thirsty, yet He took the time to minister to this woman at the very heart of her need. (Jn. 4:1-42) When Peter's mother-in-law was sick, Jesus took time to heal her. (Lk. 4:38-39) If we take time away from our agenda, can we bring healing through our intercession to the 'other woman' whom God places on our heart? Can we be a healing balm to the 'other woman,' who may have a wounded spirit?

The widow of Nain depended on her son for financial support, and now he was dead. Jesus cared enough about this 'other woman' to raise her son from the dead so that her needs would be met. (Lk 7:11-17) What about the 'other woman' you know who is widow? Can you offer her a ride to the doctor so she doesn't go alone? Can you take a few moments to let her know that you are thinking about her, or that you appreciate her?

The sinful woman came to pour out precious ointment upon the feet of Jesus. Yet, those around scorned her. (Lk 7:36-50) Would we be the same way with the 'other woman' if she suddenly started attending our church, and lavishly giving of herself to the Lord? Would we be intimidated by how fast she was growing in the Lord? Would we be jealous of her free worship of our Lord?

Joanna was a woman who supported the ministry of Jesus with her finances. (Lk. 8:1-3) If the 'other woman' has implemented some really creative ideas to support the work of the Lord, would we stand back and criticize her? Or would we desire to encourage her?

When the woman with the issue of blood approached Jesus, He was on His way to help Jairus, whose daughter was sick. It's implied in scripture that this 'other woman' wasn't important because she wasn't mentioned by name, yet Jairus was mentioned by name and occupation, giving us the idea that he was an important man. Yet, we see Jesus take time for this insignificant woman. (Lk. 8) Do we forget about the insignificant woman in order to take care of the woman who seems to be more important in social stature? Do we prefer to do our acts when they are seen by those 'important' people?

We see that the Syrophoenician woman had a serious plea and Jesus takes the time to respond to her. (Mt. 15:21-28) When the 'other woman' has a plea for a prayer request, do we take the time to agree with her right then in prayer? Or, do we tell her that we will be praying, only to forget about her request in a matter of seconds?

A woman caught in the act of adultery was quickly condemned by the people, yet Jesus refused to condemn her. (Jn. 8:1-11) Do we condemn the 'other woman,' just like the people in this story did? Do we begin to gossip about the woman, not even realizing that our mouth has led us into just as bad of a sin? Do we remember that if it wasn't for God's grace, we could be that 'other woman'?

Looking at Mary and Martha, we see Martha griping about the 'other woman,' who happened to be sitting at the feet of

Jesus, soaking up His every word. (Lk. 10:38-42) When we see the 'other woman' being truly blessed by the Lord, do we find something about which to gripe? Do we speak bitter words about her?

In Lk. 11:27-28, we find that a woman in the crowd cries out a blessing to Mary, the mother of Jesus. How often do we take time from our own agenda to simply bless the 'other woman?'

God sets many 'other women' in our path throughout the week. Many of them have been battered by trials that we can't even fathom. Some are battling deep depression because they feel like nobody cares. Some haven't felt appreciated in a long time. Who is Father laying on your heart? Isn't it time to break away from your own agenda and minister God's agenda to the 'other woman?'

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - The Insignificant Things

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The Insignificant Things

Jesus was constantly sought by the multitudes, yet when they interrupted Him, He took care of them, even if it meant a considerable cost to Himself. He was the perfect example to us of unselfishness.

There were times when the disciples wanted Jesus to send away the crowds so that they could have some 'down time.' (Mt. 14:15-21) In Jn. 6:5, we see where Jesus asked the disciples where they could get food to feed the crowds. In verse 9, Andrew mentions the young boy who had five loaves and two small fish (this was the typical bread of the very poor who lived back then). Andrew then mentions the word 'BUT.' "But how far will they go among so many?" (NIV)

The disciples were focusing on the multitudes rather than the Master of the multitudes. They were overwhelmed, yet a poor, young boy decided to give the very little, insignificant meal that he had, even if it meant more hunger for himself. There is a lesson to be learned here. Jesus doesn't ask us to give what we don't have. He only asks us to give that which we do have, however insignificant it may seem.

Sometimes we focus on conquering world hunger, which isn't going to be cured by one person. Because of the enormity of the task, we shrink back, often doing nothing. Again, Jesus doesn't call us to give that which we don't have, but He does call us to give that which we do have. I may not have thousands of dollars to give to a food relief organization, but for my neighbor who has lost his job, I can give them some groceries, or even make them some cookies. When I do these things, it's the same as doing them for Jesus.

Do you know of a family who is going through some tough times right now? Could you give them some of the clothes which your children have outgrown? When you give of those items, to clothe someone else's children, it's as if you were clothing the Master. You may be thinking that it would be better to save the items for a garage sale so that you can make some money from them. If you give them to someone else, with the right attitude, the return which you will get from God will outshine any amount that you'd make at a garage sale!

One thing many of us can do is volunteer some of our time to help make some food baskets for those less fortunate than us. All it requires is a little bit of our time. You see, Jesus isn't asking you to make their mortgage payment or to pay their utility bills. He is only asking you to do what you can do. For some of us, it may simply be donating our time, rather than our resources.

What seemingly insignificant things do you have that could make a big difference in the life of someone else?

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - Picking Scabs

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Picking Scabs

In her desperation to give Abram an heir, Sarai decided to 'help' God by giving Hagar to Abram. Sarai had no idea as to what kind of scab she was making by her actions. Once Hagar was pregnant, she began to despise Sarai. (Gen. 16:4)

In picking scabs, Sarai begins to blame Abram for her suffering, even though SHE is the one who told Abram to sleep with her maidservant. Not only that, she begins to mistreat Hagar. How many times have we done something that we shouldn't have, only to end up taking out our frustrations on those around us?

About thirteen years later, God speaks His promise to Abram regarding the covenant to be a father of many nations. God even changes Abram's name to Abraham, and Sarai's name to Sarah. Later, we see where the three men come to visit Abraham, telling him that Sarah will give birth to a son in about a year. As we read about the birth of Isaac, it appears that maybe Sarah's scabs have healed....Well, maybe not. In Gen. 21:9, we see where Sarah observes Ishmael mocking Isaac. She quickly orders Abraham to get rid of Hagar and Ishmael. In picking her scab, I wonder if Sarah realized what kind of pain she was bringing upon Abraham. (Gen. 21:11)

If we look at the story of Esau and Jacob, we see more scabs. For starters, in Gen. 25:28, we see where Isaac loved Esau, and Rebecca loved Jacob. I can see problems already. Can you imagine how your household would be if you chose to love one child more than the others, and your husband chose to love a different child more than the others? There would be so much strife between husband and wife, not to mention the jealousy between the children. Bickering would be an everyday occurrence in the home. I can picture the children always competing to have the upper hand.

Looking back to our story, that is exactly what happened. Esau comes home from having been outside for quite some time, feeling famished. Jacob has some stew, and he is even willing to share it with Esau......for a price. The scab is being picked again.

In Gen. 27, we see where Rebekah connives and manipulates to get the blessing of the firstborn for her favorite son. She succeeds, but the thrill of conquering is short-lived. The scab is so infected now that Jacob has to flee for his life, and he never sees his dear mother again. What good is it if a man gains the whole world and loses his soul? In their pursuit to have it all, Jacob and Rebekah lost each other. Some wounds never heal.

Our final example of one who was guilty of picking scabs is Martha. I use her as an example because there are many times when we are just like her. Martha is frantically working in the kitchen, trying to prepare a feast for Jesus. She is distracted by the many preparations, but she is also distracted in her thoughts, thinking about how Mary has left her to do all the work, while she is just sitting at the feet of Jesus, doing nothing. I'll bet she had all kinds of thoughts going through her mind.

"That lazy sister of mine has done it again -- leaving all of the work to me."

"I have never felt so 'taken for granted' in all of my life!"

"My sister is so undependable! Just when I need her the most, she leaves me!"

"Mary may help for a while, but once there's a man around, forget it! She darts off to work her female charm."

"I've had it! Enough of this! I'm going to have Jesus put her in her place, and tell her to get in here and help me."

How many times do we listen to our negative self-talk while we are busily working around the house, at our job, or even serving in the church?

Martha has done what many of us do -- she has equated serving the Master with communing with the Master. In the process, she's gotten the wrong focus, and now she's picking scabs.

Martha is expecting to have Jesus put Mary in her place for doing nothing but just sitting there. What Martha hears is something else. Jesus is putting Martha in HER place! He defends Mary's choice to do nothing, but sit at His feet, saying that Mary has made the best choice, and He isn't going to take it from her.

Do you need to sit quietly before Jesus, doing nothing, and let Him tend to all the scabs you've been picking?

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - Picking Fruit

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Picking Fruit

Strawberries, grapes, bananas....ahhh, the scents of summertime fruits. Delicious, appealing, inviting! A scrumptious fruit salad can be so invigorating on a sweltering, summer day.

Just before we are able to bite into that luscious fruit, we have to first pluck the grapes from the vine. Sometimes the grapes are attached so well to the vine that it requires some pulling to get it loose.

Moving on to the bananas, it requires pulling them apart, one by one. Sometimes the way it's pulled causes the peel to be ripped off of the end, exposing the inside of the banana.

Now we're ready for the strawberries. Before we can eat them, we have to core out the stem. I use a special spoon with sharp, jagged edges to cut out the stem. As I'm doing that, I can usually find a few strawberries that have been bruised.

Galatians 5:22-23 tells us that we are to have fruit in our lives. We are to have love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Just as we have to pick the fruit that we eat in order to enjoy it, we will have times in our lives when our own fruit needs to be picked. How do we respond when someone starts picking our fruit? We never know what kind of fruit we have until people start picking it. How do we act when someone starts ripping and tearing away at our patience? What is our response when our love is jaggedly ripped to the core? When we are peeled away, much like a banana peel, and our naked wounds are exposed, do we come up fighting to try and protect ourselves? When self-control gets pulled, do we lose our joy? When gentleness gets plucked, do we become unkind? When we've become bruised, do we continue to be faithful in serving God and showing love to others. When we've been torn over an issue, do we forget to walk in goodness? When others pick our fruit, do we blow our stack and lose our peace?

Who's picking your fruit? How does is look, once it's picked?

Picking Fruit, Part 2

We are told that Christians should have the fruit of the Spirit in their lives. That consists of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

I've heard many people over the years refer to the fruit of the Spirit as 'fruits.' However, the Bible doesn't use the plural when referring to it. Many times, we think we can choose which fruit we want in our life. Why is that?

If I ask God to work His love within me, it might require me to love with abandon, and require something of me which I don't want to give. I think I'll just use selective love. It's much safer for me.

I like to experience joy, yet so often I feel like I'm lacking in that area. Maybe that is because I know that weeping endures for the night, and joy comes in the morning. To get to that place of joy, I must first endure the nights of weeping, and I don't want to experience pain that causes me to weep.

Peace is a wonderful thing to have abiding in me, but it also requires work. Heb. 12:14 tells me that I should make every effort to live in peace with others. Putting forth effort can be tiresome. It can also put me in a position of being rejected, and I don't like that feeling. I think I'll skip the peace. Maybe I can live without it.

If I ask for patience, God may send all kinds of trials and tests my way to work that quality in my life. Nope, that's too risky. I guess I'd better skip that fruit!

I can't get over this fast-paced world in which I live. There's fast-food restaurants, convenience stores that even have a drive-thru so I don't have to get out of the car to get what I need, and high-speed Internet access, just to name a few. If I asked the Lord to develop kindness in me, then I might not get what I want from people when I want it. It's just easier to be abrasive and demanding. After all, people will jump to meet my demands, if only to get rid of me.

Why is it that I never see goodness in people anymore? People are so consumed with me, myself, and I that they don't want to take the time to show some goodness. But, goodness gracious! If I had goodness in my life, I might not get that position in the women's ministry that I've been coveting for so many years! I better keep resorting to being overbearing and pushing my way to where I want to be. After all, no one else is going to watch out for me!

I think I'll skip asking for God to develop this faithfulness thing in my life. If I don't, He may have me committed to seven different ministries that I don't want to do! And I do want to have plenty of time to do what I want to do. Never mind what He wants me to do.

Why would I ask for gentleness? The kids would take over me! They would use me for a doormat if I was gentle with them. I get more results from them if I demand things from them, and demand them NOW!

The kids are just driving me nuts! The only way that I can seem to get them to mind and do what I want is to yell at them. It would be kind of nice to have some self-control there, but when I try to tell them nicely to do something, they just sit there, watching TV, playing on the computer, playing with their toys, talking on the phone, or reading a book. Yelling and screaming seem to be much more effective. I guess I'll skip this fruit too.

My toes really hurt now. How about yours?

© Aug. 21, 2004