Proverbs 31 Devotionals

• Oct. 3, 2008 - Cross Dressing

Cross Dressing

My ten year old daughter and I had the unfortunate experience of running into a drunken cross-dresser one day. I really did not care to have her exposed to this kind of lifestyle at such a young age. To complicate matters even more, I had to explain to her why this man, who attends our church, is dressed like a lady.

After returning home, the Lord revealed to me that all Christians, at one time or another, have been guilty of being cross-dressers. The difference is that our cross-dressing does not affect our clothing, but our spirit.

Christians are commanded to put on garments of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, and love. (Colossians 3:12-14)

As I read that verse, I began to think of the many times my husband has needed a compassionate, listening ear. Instead, I dressed myself in a garment that said, “I am too busy to listen to you right now.”

How many times have we been in a long line at the grocery store, only to offer the cashier rudeness instead of kindness?

Instead of putting on humility, we choose a prideful garment. Even though we may not be speaking our prideful thoughts audibly, God hears, and He is not pleased. (Proverbs 8:13; First Peter 5:5)

I can think of several times when my daughter has struggled with a new concept in school. As her teacher, and even more so, as a Christian, I should offer her gentleness. Instead, I put on harshness or a critical spirit.

When we are trying to get out the door, and the rest of the family is poking along, how often are we patient with them? If we are honest, most of us would be embarrassed to admit how often we put on the garment of impatience.

Patience seems to be one of those garments that we would rather not wear. It seems to fit about as comfortably as a tight-fitting girdle. Instead, we opt for impatience, which often shows itself through anger, rudeness, rage, foul language, and very discernable body language.

We are to be dressed in love, yet how do we act when a dirty, smelly person visits our church? Do we put on the garment of love? Or do we turn aside, pretending they are not there?

When we get dressed, we may look through our closet and think, “I do not feel like wearing this outfit today.” I think we also do this with the garment of love. We tend to think that love is a feeling. If we do not feel like wearing it, we will tend to put on bitterness, anger, unforgiveness, rudeness, selfishness, and a critical spirit.

I was really disgusted by the sight of the drunken cross-dresser. However, after allowing the Holy Spirit to show me many occasions where I have guilty of cross-dressing, I am more disgusted with my own behavior.

Father, help me to daily put on the Lord Jesus so that I can cease to be a cross-dresser. Amen. (Romans 13:14)

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• Oct. 2, 2008 - Hide and Seek

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Hide and Seek

Children seem to revel in playing hide and seek. They find such pleasure in this game. We, as adults, often play hide and seek, but we don't do it because it's fun. In fact, it is an often painful "game" which we play. We do it because we are trying to hide our hurt feelings, our anger, our fears, our failing marriage, physical or emotional abuse, our sin, and the list could go on and on. What do you hide behind? Many times it can be the big things, but sometimes it's the "little" things that can cause us to hide. You know, those nagging little things like envy of a friend's nicer, bigger home, or anger at being treated unfairly, or the jealousy of a friend who has a prestigious job and gets to wear nice clothes all the time......

You may think that you are hiding things very well, but God says:

"For the ways of man are directly before the eyes of the Lord, and He carefully weighs all man's goings." Prov. 5:21 Amp. Bible

Ps. 139:2-3 says that God knows when we sit or stand. God understands our thoughts from afar. He sifts and searches out our paths and our lying down, and He's acquainted with all of our ways.

Ps. 139:7 "Where could I go from Your Spirit? Or where could I flee from Your presence?" Amp. Bible

Luke 12:2 says that nothing is so closely hidden that it won't be revealed.

Jer. 23:24 "Can anyone hide himself in secret places so that I cannot see him?" Amp. Bible

Let's look at some people in scripture who played "Hide and Seek." The first game of hide and seek was in Genesis with Adam and Eve. (Gen. 3:10) The sin which they tried to hide ended up getting them kicked out of the garden of Eden.

Jonah also felt the need to play this game. (Jonah 1:3-4) Where did it get him? He was in the belly of a fish for 3 days and nights. I was pondering on this the other day, after my husband and daughter went through a bout with the stomach flu. When you have the flu, you get to the point where you are just vomiting bile, and not only does it taste bad, but it SMELLS AWFUL!!! That sick smell just seems to linger if you don't work hard to clean everything. Imagine what Jonah went through, living amongst the bile of a fish, and for 3 days!! YUCK!!!! Sin will surely take you places where you DON'T want to go!

David committed adultery with Bathsheba and went so far as to have her husband killed on the front lines. He thought that he had done a good job of covering up for his wrong doing, that is, until Nathan the prophet approached him. Num. 32:23 says to be sure that your sin will find you out.

Hagar ended up running away from Sarah after Sarah "dealt severely with her, humbling and afflicting her." Gen. 16:6 (Amp. Bible) In verse 8, God said to Hagar, "Where did you come from, and where are you intending to go?" It ended up that Hagar called God El Roi - "the One who sees." Gen. 16:13 Even when she tried to hide, God still saw her.

If you trying to play your own game of "Hide and Seek," I promise you that you won't win. Sometimes it is so hard to admit those things which we hide behind. I know, I've been there, and unfortunately, I've played this game more than once or twice. I remember a time when someone at church kept showing me their baby and telling me that I needed one of my own. I didn't realize it at the time, but I let a stronghold of anger and bitterness develop over it. I had some serious back trouble at the time which made pregnancy seem like an impossibility for me, not to mention that I had chronic colitis, and was on 6-8 pills a day. That sure wasn't a conducive environment to a pregnancy. (God has since delivered me of the chronic colitis, and maybe one of these times I will share that AWESOME experience.) It was so bad that God had to remove me from that particular church for a while so that he could get me away from situation. For the longest time, I blamed it on the pastor. "I wasn't getting fed." Ever hear those famous words? Eventually, I was to the place where God uncovered that "hidden place" in my heart, and I dealt with it, and was very quickly back into my original church. I have no anger or resentment toward the person who originally offended me. I can now see her as a very dear sister in the Lord.

If you are playing the "game," please pray for God to reveal to you what is in your heart, mind, soul, and spirit that isn't pleasing to Him. Allow Him to show you where you aren't clearly seeing things which need to be corrected. Pray for Him to strip down the walls of arrogance and fear, and to expose you to yourself. (That can be scary, but well worth it!) Pray for Him to give you the desire and strength to correct the error of your ways. Pray for Him to help you to replace any lies of the enemy with the truth of His Word. (Remember how I shared in an earlier devotional about how Satan twisted the Word with me on the sowing and reaping principal?)

Psalm 32:3-4 "When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me, my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer." (NIV)

Ps. 38:3-5 "Because of your wrath there is no health in my body; my bones have no soundness because of my sin. My guilt has overwhelmed me like a burden too heavy to bear. My wounds fester and are loathsome because of my sinful folly. (NIV) Life is hard enough without adding to the burden by trying to play "Hide and Seek" when there is no way that we will ever win.

When you confess your sin, it's not like you are telling God something that is going to shock Him, or make Him turn away from you. He all ready knows about it. Confession is just admitting to God what He all ready knows, and agreeing with Him that what you did is wrong. Then comes repentance - truly being sorry to the point of grief, and turning away from it. I know in my own walk, I can repent, but then I find myself doing the same thing, even though my intention was to truly turn away from it. When we repent of something it doesn't mean that we won't ever commit that sin again. It simply means that we don't INTEND to ever commit that sin again. Anytime we sin, we need to quickly repent so that the death process which has been set into motion will be stopped; for we know that the "wages of sin is death." Rom. 6:23.

Prov. 28:13 I am paraphrasing here: She who continues to play "Hide and Seek" will not prosper, but she who confesses and renounces the game will find mercy from her Lord.

Acts 3:19 paraphrasing again: Quit playing "Hide and Seek" so that your sins may be blotted out, then will come times of refreshing in the presence of the Lord.

My sisters, time is too short to be playing games in any way with our spiritual walk. Let's be diligent in making sure that we are keeping our garments spotless so that we can be unashamed when Jesus comes to take us to that glorious marriage supper of the Lamb.

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• Oct. 2, 2008 - The Adulteress

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The Adulteress

I love to read through Proverbs, but when I get to those chapters about the adulteress, and how to avoid her, I get a little bored. After all, I am not ever going to visit an adulteress, nor do I have plans to ever be an adulteress! :) So, how do I apply that portion of scripture to my life?

Proverbs 5:20 says Why be captivated by an adulteress? Why waste time with a promiscuous stranger?

As I pondered on the above scriptures, it occurred to me that while we, as women, would never visit an adulteress, we can commit spiritual adultery.

There is so much in the world that tries to get our attention. The new reality TV shows, secular books, the talk shows, soap operas, the malls, the idea of "keeping up with the Jones's," the Internet, and even adult toys and gadgets. There is always something out there to tempt us to get our focus off of where we should be focusing.

I Jn. 2:15 says that we shouldn't love the world or anything in the world. If any man loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. Wow! That's a tough one to think that if we love the world too much, God's love isn't even in us. I'm not sure that I like that scripture!

It's just too easy to get caught up in worldly things. I remember right after becoming a mother, it was too easy to turn on Maury or Montel or Jenny Jones while I was sitting there nursing Rachel. I missed adult conversation. I had worked full time for many years, and suddenly, I was home with an infant who couldn't converse with me beyond crying. It was so easy to fall into the trap of letting the TV entertain. Thank God, I quickly realized the effect those shows were having on me, and I switched to Christian TV, if any. The atmosphere in the home was so different -- so alive, instead of making me feel like I was drowning emotionally.

I've had a struggle with using the computer too. We have only had it for about 6 or 7 months. It's so nice to be able to keep in touch with friends and relatives on a daily basis. While that is good, it's not so good when I begin, by my actions, to tell the Lord that I would rather be online than in His Word.

I even began going into Christian chatrooms, and found to my dismay, that many of them were "Christian" in name only. There was still a lot of filth in there. Sure, I could use the ignore button, but my eyes had already taken in what was said, and transferred it to my spirit. I began to think of what Job said in chapter 31:1 about making a covenant with his eyes not to look lustfully upon a woman. I made a covenant with my eyes that I wouldn't even visit the chatrooms because it was defiling my spirit. Not only that, while I was in a chatroom, I wasn't spending quality time with my daughter. We had gotten away from playing games together. Now that I am back on track, I really look forward to those times of the day when we can sit down and play games together.

Another area where we can struggle is in our choice of books to read. There are many secular books out there that look interesting. Some of them even relate to where many of us are right now -- parenting. But again, if you look at Ps. 1:1, it says that the man who doesn't walk in the counsel (advice) of the ungodly is blessed. Well, a secular book on parenting may have a few good ideas, but the fact remains that most of what is in the book is advice which is ungodly counsel.

Ps. 119:15-16 says "I meditate on your precepts and consider your ways. I delight in your decrees; I will not neglect your word." NIV How often do we neglect the Word, and if honest, we have to admit that we really had no good excuse for doing it?

119:18 "Open my eyes that I may see wonderful things in your law." NIV

When I open the Word, this is often a prayer which I pray for myself. I want to see those hidden treasures in the Word because they are LIFE for me!

119:31 "I hold fast to your statutes, O Lord." NIV How can we hold fast to His statutes if we don't stay in the Word enough to even learn them?

119:58 "I have sought your face with all my heart." NIV Hmmmm, have I really done that?

119:72 "The law from your mouth is more precious to me than thousands of pieces of silver and gold." NIV By our actions, can anyone tell that this is how we really feel about the Word?

119:92 "If your law had not been my delight, I would have perished in my affliction." Verse 111 says that God's statutes are the joy of my heart. Do we really delight in the Word? If we do, then it's a joy to read the Word.

119:131 "I open my mouth and pant, longing for your commands." NIV When you haven't spent your daily quiet time with God, is your relationship with Him so close that your spirit can actually pant for Him and His presence?

119:171 "May my lips overflow with praise, for you teach me your decrees." NIV

119:172 "May my tongue sing of your word for all your commands are righteous."

Father, may You show us wonderful things in Your Word each time we read it. Show us those hidden treasures of wisdom and knowledge. Let those quiet times with You become such a joyous treasure that our spirits will pant to be in those intimate moments with You. As we have many things which require our attention every day, help us to keep our focus and our minds on You, for You said in Is. 26:3 that You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfastly fixed on You. Help us to walk daily in that wonderful peace. Amen.

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - Going for Broke

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Going for Broke

I love to read the story where Mary, the sister of Lazarus, breaks open her expensive bottle of perfume and lavishly, lovingly, pours it on Jesus. This bottle of perfume is her dowry. It is very costly. To break this bottle of expensive perfume likely means that she gives up the dream that most women have -- that of getting married. Back then, if you didn't have a sizable dowry, you weren't classified as marrying material. Inspite of that, Mary chose to 'go for broke.' What a precious gift she gave the Lord.

I love how Mary gave the best she could give, and she didn't even care what others thought of her. When the customs of that day said that she should have been in the kitchen helping Martha, there sits Mary, at the feet of Jesus, taking in his every word. (Lk. 10:38-43)

In 'going for broke,' we can gain so much because we learn to let go of ourselves. To offer something sacrificial to our Lord, it requires us to be broken of our self-centeredness and our pride. It requires us to look beyond our financial needs, looking beyond our fears for the future, and lavishing our love upon Jesus.

When we are broken by God, we experience true joy because weeping endures for the night, but God promises us that joy will come in the morning.

We learn that our life is in the Master's hands, and He is carefully watching over us, using everything we face to bring about honor to His name. The brokenness we learn from our trials gains us peace that passes all understanding.

Being broken helps me to understand that God's agenda is much more important than my own. That can give me a greater patience because I realize that I really can let my own agenda go.

When I'm broken to the point where I realize that I have no rights, it reduces my urge to compete with others, and that helps me to walk in kindness.

In our brokenness, when God strips away our pride, we realize that within us lies no good thing, and that our heart is deceitful and desperately wicked. We learn that any goodness that comes from us is ultimately from Him.

In the midst of deep brokenness, we discover that the greener grass is actually being in the center of His will, even in those times when we don't understand His plan. This leads us to follow hard after faithfulness. We become faithful and steady even in the hardest of times. What an awesome sacrifice that is to the Lord. He knows how hard it is for us to remain faithful and steady.

When we pour out our fleshly tendencies to the Lord, we realize the depths of our wretchedness. We also see the heights of God's graciousness and goodness towards us. That works in us a gentleness in responding to those around us.

God gives us all that we need pertaining to life and godliness. We have power to say NO to worldly passion. When that passion is to lose our temper, we react instead of respond to situations. Maybe the worldly passion is spending money that we don't have, or usurping our authority over our husband. It may even be a passion to have an affair -- whether that affair be physical, emotional, or even just in our mind. Breaking open that alabaster box of our flesh can bring us a self-control where we truly want what our heavenly Father wants -- obedience.

So many times, when we think of giving a sacrificial gift to God, like Mary did with her alabaster box, we think in terms of something that may cost us financially. We see in I Sam. 15 that to obey is better than sacrifice. Instead of trying to come up with an expensive gift to offer the Lord, why not offer up your sinful flesh? There is nothing more precious in His sight than a child who comes to offer their flesh, allowing Him to cut away those unwanted pieces so that He can make you more like Him. We may discover that sometimes obedience IS the sacrifice.

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - What Did I Tell You to do?

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What Did I Tell You to Do?

Recently, I’ve had to implement a new method to giving instructions to Rachel. After telling her to do something, I would discover that it wasn’t done. I’d find myself saying, “What did I tell you to do?” She’d claim that she didn’t hear me, and I’d end up repeating the same thing three or four times, wearing myself out in the process. In my frustration, I’d often resort to yelling things like, “Why are your shoes still by the back door when I’ve told you three times to put them away?” Or, “Why aren’t your teeth brushed? I told you to do it twenty minutes ago!” I think you get the picture.

A wise lady suggested that when I tell Rachel to do something, have her repeat the instructions back to me. If she fails to do what I told her to do, she can’t use her normal excuse of not hearing me. I am amazed at how well this method has worked for us!

I have a feeling that sometimes God wants to yell at us, “What did I tell you to do?” Not that God needs to hear us repeat the instructions He’s given us, but WE need to speak them verbally so that they stick in our mind.

When I have trouble in submitting to my husband, I can say, “Jesus didn’t hurl insults when He was insulted, nor did He retaliate. He didn’t make threats, but He entrusted Himself to God, who judges justly. In the same way, I am to be submissive to my husband. I am to be like the holy women of old, who put their hope in God.” (I Peter 2:23, II Peter 3:1, 5) Keep in mind that I’m not saying that you should submit to a husband who abuses you or your children, or that you should submit if your husband asks you to do something that is clearly sinful.

When I am having a hard time forgiving someone, I can remind myself, “Stacy, you are to forgive others as Christ forgave you for all of your sins. If you don’t, Jesus won’t forgive you for the sins you’ve committed.” (Matthew 6:14; Colossians 3:13)

When I have trouble trusting God, I can remind myself, “If I trust God with all of my heart, instead of relying on my own understanding, and if I acknowledge Him in all my ways, then He promises to make my way straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)

If I want favor with God and man, I can tell myself daily, “If I will not let love and faithfulness leave me, but bind them upon my mind and write them on my heart, I will win favor and a good name with God and man.” (Proverbs 3:3-4)

When I struggle with being content, I can say, “Godliness with contentment is great gain, and I am in the process of training myself to be godly.” (I Timothy 4:7; 6:6)

When I struggle with overeating or eating the wrong things, as I reach for some food, I can ask myself, “Does eating this food bring glory to God?” (I Corinthians 10:31) I can remind myself that my body is a temple of the Lord, and I am to honor God with that temple.

When I struggle with the temptation to gossip, I can ask myself if I want someone to gossip about me. After all, you do reap what you sow. I can tell myself that if I have a loose tongue, I have a heart that is of little value. (Proverbs 19:20) If I gossip, I’m like a foolish woman, who will die for her lack of judgment. (Proverbs 19:21) If I gossip, I’m like a pig with a gold ring in its snout because I show a lack of discretion with my tongue. (Proverbs 11:22)

If I struggle with a secret sin, I can say, “Stacy, as long as you hide this sin, you won’t prosper, but if you’re willing to give it up, you’ll find mercy.” (Proverbs 28:13) I can remind myself that if I cherish sin in my heart, that God won’t hear my prayers. (Psalm 66:18) I have heard people say that their sin doesn’t affect others, but I believe that it does. When I am cherishing sin in my heart, and someone asks me to pray for them, my prayers are ineffective because a holy God can’t listen to the prayers of someone who is cherishing sin. Cherishing sin is the ultimate in selfishness. By cherishing a sin, we are saying that our cherished sin is more important than interceding for someone.

Are you in a place where you need to repeat Father’s instructions?

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - Mind Your Own Business

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Mind Your Own Business

I remember hearing it said that gossip is sharing any piece of information about another person that isn't necessary. Yet, how many times do we find ourselves doing just that?

On the Wednesday night before the FMA (Family Marriage Amendment) was coming up for a vote in the Senate, our pastor mentioned that there was some talk that homosexuals were planning to target some churches around the nation on that coming Sunday. He briefly shared that they may picket with signs and/or try to disrupt church services. He then mentioned that coming to churches was another one of their methods to get their own point of view heard. Anyway, someone in the church wasn't paying real close attention to what Pastor had said. The next day I received a phone call from a friend who was very disturbed over something she had heard that our pastor supposedly said. She proceeded to tell me that this individual told her that our pastor was opening up our church to homosexual advocates. Because this person didn't pay close attention to what was actually being said, they ended up slandering our pastor, speaking lies about him, tainting his character.

An area where I see falsehoods, gossip, and slander quite frequently are in the myriad of urban legends circulating on the Internet. Time is a very precious commodity, and I don't want to waste mine on reading that kind of trash. Yet, I continually find that people keep sending them to me every week. We would be wise to use some discretion when we receive these kinds of messages in our email box. Rather than immediately sending them on to every person in your address book, check them out first to see if they are even true. A great resource for checking to see if something is an urban legend is http://www.snopes.com/. When I take the time to research these kinds of messages, I have only found about two of them that were actually accurate messages.

Recently, as I headed into the women's restroom at church, and closed the door, I saw a note posted on the door. It said that someone who speaks to you about someone will also speak about you to someone.

Proverbs shares some wonderful insights regarding being a talebearer. A gossip is one who will spread rumors. Yet, the flip side is that she who is trustworthy will stop rumors. (11:13 NIV) She who guards her lips guards her own life. (13:3) Many times gossip isn't true, so when we share it, we are telling lies, and God hates a lying tongue. (6:17)

So, how do we help to guard ourselves against this all-too-common trap? In II Tim. 4:2, we are told to be ready in season and out of season. If we want to do our best to be godly women, not given to the destructive habit of gossiping, we need to be prepared with a response so that when (not if) someone wants to gossip to us, we have a response ready to speak forth to them. For instance, when Sister Busybody approaches you and says, "Did you hear about so-and-so?", you can immediately respond with, "No, and if it's something bad about them, I'd rather not hear it, thank you." Or another response could be, "Would this person care if they knew you were about to share this issue with me?" Another way of putting it would be to say, "If you what you have to say about them is edifying, I would love to hear it!" Sometimes a gentle admonishment is a good approach. Share with this person a past experience, where someone has spoken something less-than-desirable about another person -- a person whom you barely knew. The end result was that every time you saw this other person, that conversation where gossip was shared is always in the forefront of your mind. You might even share that having those kinds of thoughts always popping up isn't pleasant, so you do your best to avoid having that happen again.

The Bible tells us that we are to correct, rebuke, and encourage. (II Tim. 4:2) Part of correcting or rebuking may be to stop people who have wagging tongues when they approach us. Yes, it's possible that we may offend them. Yes, it's likely that they may turn and stab us in the back because we dared to stop them in their sin. But Sister, I ask you: Whose applause and approval do you desire? Do you desire the approval and acceptance of a gossip, who is likely to gossip about you? Or, do you desire the approval of the Lord who was willing to die for you?

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• Oct. 1, 2008 - What is Your Sacrifice?

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What is Your Sacrifice?

The Bible tell us that the sacrifices of God are a broken spirit. God won't reject those who come with a broken and contrite heart. Ps. 51:17 What pain do you have? What brokenness do you carry within? What of your past? Are there things there that you absolutely despise?

Father desires that we lay it down at His feet, as a sacrifice to Him. What you sacrifice to Him is something that no other person can give Him. It's yours alone. Only YOU can give Him your brokenness, your pain, your past. That makes it a very unique sacrifice. And God says that He won't despise that sacrifice from us.

He promises in Is. 61:2-3 that He will comfort those who are mourning, giving them beauty for their ashes. He will grace you with a garment of praise instead of the heaviness which leaves you weary and worn. Will it cost you to give this sacrifice to Him? Oh yes! It will cost you greatly, but think of the sacrifice which Jesus gave: His very life, and He did it for you.

Has your husband left you high and dry for one who years younger than you? Has he left you because he claims that he couldn't handle the stress anymore? Have you been violated? Jesus wants you to offer that brokenness and pain to Him. He bore the shame of it for you, so why allow yourself to carry that heavy yoke any longer?

Were you date raped in your younger years, yet that awful experience continues to haunt you, even though you know it wasn't your fault? Have you been abused by one whom you trusted? You are not responsible it. You are not to be blamed! You aren't dirtied or devalued, as the devil would like to have you think. No matter how you were treated, your perpetrator sinned against you and the Lord.

One of the hardest parts of being a victim of any similar circumstance is our response to what occurred. We ALL have a sin nature, and Satan's desire is to snare you through that very sin nature by getting you to cater to it. He is a master deceiver, and he can get us so ensnared that we may find ourselves with an unconscious unwillingness to be healed from the pain of the past. When we allow this to happen, we can be like the people in Jer. 30:12-15 who had an incurable wound, who could have no healing for their sores because their iniquity was so great. One of those incurable wounds can start with the seed of bitterness and unforgiveness. It grows within us, day by day. Before we know it, we are bound in spiritual chains that will only be broken by a mighty deliverance from the Lord.

Satan can't trap us with an opened door, but if we take on a 'victim's mentality,' we put ourselves on very shaky ground, possibly opening a door for him. Many years ago, I discovered that I had unintentionally opened a door to the enemy of my soul. I struggled with chronic colitis for several years. My victim's mentality was to blame the colitis on the stress of my job. In coming through the deliverance process, Father clearly told me one day to NEVER make that comment again. He informed me that the colitis was not a result of the stress of my job, but rather MY reaction to the stress of my job. That was very humbling to see that it was ME who opened the doorway to the enemy, allowing him to reek havoc with my body. I didn't intend to open the door for Satan, but the Lord showed me where I had willingly done so through that root of bitterness. What an awful path it led me on, and it lasted for years. It was so bad that I was on three different kinds of medicine, two of which were pain killers. I even had to take the heating pad to work with me several times a week, just because the pain in my abdomen was so great, not to mention the many visits to the doctor, having an upper GI done, as well as a colonoscopy. As a newlywed, I found that chronic colitis was also interrupting the intimate side of my marriage.

You see, our 'natural' response when we have been victimized may be to blame others, to feel that we need to be in control of everything, and at all costs. But notice that I used the word 'natural.' As Christians, we are not to be following after that 'natural' man anymore. Rom. 12:1-2 tells us that we are to offer our bodies as a living sacrifice (sacrificing all of those past hurts), to God. We aren't to be conforming to this world anymore (meaning that we quit playing the blame-game.) God desires to be a restorer to us when we have been victimized and abused. But when we spend so much time and precious energy on blaming others and being so overly self-focused, we are blocking the restoration that God desires to bring.

Father, help me to search my heart to see if there is more brokenness there that You desire for me to offer to You. Help me to discover where there might be more shame, so that I can offer it to You, allowing You to carry that burden for me, allowing me to find that Your yoke is easy and Your burden is light. Amen.

The Sacrifice, Part 2

In continuing our study on our sacrifices, I want to ask: Were you abused? Jesus bore your grief from that abuse. Are you sorrowing over a betrayal from the one who vowed before God to be faithful to you? Jesus carried that sorrow for you. Do you still feel like you will never get over the pain or betrayal? With God ALL things are possible. Mt. 19:26 In all of your weakness, His strength is made perfect. II Cor. 12:9 Do you still carry guilt over losing your virginity before marriage? Is. 53 tells us that He was pierced for that transgression. For all of those sins which try to nag at your, pulling you two steps backward for every single step forward, Jesus was crushed for them ALL! Do you hear me, dear sister? I said that Jesus was crushed for them ALL! He took the chastisement for our peace, and by His stripes, we are healed and restored. No amount of guilt, shame, remorse, or blaming will fix it. It is a finished work. So if you are struggling in this area, I pray that God will enable you to be still and know that He is GOD! Ps. 46:10

If you still feel so dirty, like God couldn't possibly love you, let the words from Zeph. 3:17-18 encourage you. God takes great delight in you, and He is mighty to save you. He longs to quiet you with His love, and He wants you to know that He rejoices over you with singing. Yes, sister, it doesn't matter what your past holds, He loves you. He even tells us in Is. 41:9-10 that He hasn't rejected us, but chosen us! So don't fear Him. He is here to help, to heal, to hold you. In Is. 57:18, He tells us that He will heal us and guide us, and that He will restore comfort to us.

My sister, don't think that I'm trying to downplay the pain which you may be carrying. I am not going to negate that your life may be wracked with torment from things of the past. Your life may still be in shambles because of someone else's sin against you. I write this to you so that you don't allow your soul to become entwined in shackles.

I will never forget reading about Lisa Beamer, whose husband was on United Airlines flight 93 on Sept. 11, 2001. She knows that it was someone else's sin who took her husband from her. It was because of someone else's sin that her daughter will never know her daddy. Lisa could have blamed the government, but instead, she has been a great example of one who has a confident assurance that her life is in God's hands. She is confident that even her husband's life was securely in God's hands, even in the face of evil, just moments before he was transferred from earth to glory.

Know that your life is in God's hands as well. He has not forgotten you, nor forsaken you. He died for all of the pain and grief that you currently carry. He is waiting patiently, lovingly, for you to hand those over to Him, giving Him your sacrifice -- a sacrifice that no one else can possibly give Him. He wants to give you that garment of praise for your current spirit of heaviness. What sacrifice do you have to offer the Master today?

© 2003, Stacy R. Miller