Yes, you read that right, I am home alone right now. I have realized my kids have come to the age that they will be gone at friend's houses and sometimes both gone at the same time. Sarah was invited over to her friends house today after playgroup. It's been set up for a week. Then at playgroup a friend of ours that we've been trying to get the her boy and Paulie together, she asked if Paulie wanted to come over today after lunch. You mean both of them gone at the same time? Wow, have I finally reached that stage in my life? Since I'm sitting here in a quiet house, I guess I have. I've always been o.k. with being by myself. I lived on my own for a little over 7 years before I got married, so being by myself really wasn't an issue. But I will admit, I am so out of that habit now. I try to cram so many things in during those few hours I'm by myself. But usually what happens is I end of falling asleep. And I'm fighting to keep my eyes opened right now.
It's the new phases in my life that creep up on me. It's like I know they will come, but then it seems to be an out of the blue, overnight thing, and I'm there. My oldest is going to be a teenager next month, my youngest is 11 yo and going by himself to a friends house, and I'm turning 40 next month. The emotions and actions I see from my kids are changing (some good, some needing to be worked on ) and Paul and my relationship seems to be changing a bit (for the good). I know that these are things I need to get use to, and truly I'm not worried about them, it's just all so different. But it's a good different too. When I looked down the road at age 20 I never envisioned myself where I am today. But I'm happy were I am today, though I know it will continue to change, and I think I'll be happy with the changes too.
It's funny how when you are younger, you see yourself as one way, and expect to be that same person your whole life. But as you get older you see yourself changing, and knowing that the changes usually don't end. I see lots of elderly people and I wonder, will I be a bitter, snappy, angry old bitty when I get older or will God's love shine through my life? Right now I still have such an angry side that rears its ugly head all too often. I worry that I'll end up being that bitter, snappy, angry old bitty, but I pray I allow God's love to shine through.
Wow, talk about reflecting and dumping on you guys, sorry. Not quite sure where all of that came from, but when it just starts flowing, I just keep typing. Though this is read by others, its also my thoughts I want to have written down. Obviously that's something I needed to get out. Thanks for reading it with me.
With my birthday coming up my mom said she's going to give me some extra money for it. I'm already mulling around in my head what I want to spend it on. I'm thinking web design software, but that's only if I can get a real good price on it. I also want to make a little reading area in our bedroom. I want to get a rocker/glider, side table and small lamp. I also need to get a new (though it can be a cheaper one) 5 drawer dresser. We have a big long one in our room now. I would get rid of that one, use two upright ones then I would have more room for the little corner. But a glider, side table, lamp and dresser won't be cheap. The side table and lamp I could probably get a the second hand store somewhat cheap, and the dresser, I think I can get at Walmart or something like that pretty cheap. It's the gilder I'm a bit worried about. Plus I want to start a small herb garden in the kitchen and maybe get a book. Now you can see from my list I'm not going to be able to do all of it, so that's my dilemma. Trying to figure out what I can do and which things I want the most. I guess I just need to start pricing things and go from there.
I'm thinking of changing our science curriculum, though we won't be able to change it until next year. I've really been hearing some good things about apologia science, and I think I really want to give it a try. But all of our school money has been spent for the year, so it will have to wait. I think we'll be starting school around August 13th or 14th. Sarah's birthday is the 12th, so I know we won't be starting that day. It's going to be different this year though because we live in a neighborhood. The kids across the street can come over pretty early sometimes, though we tell them not too. So I think it will take a few times of having to say, "We are doing school right now, please don't come over in the morning." We've never lived this close to others, so starting earlier then the schools around here was never an issue, until now. I do pray they don't keep trying to come over early in the morning. I guess we'll see.
Well, I have rambled on enough. I should go check some other blogs, catch up with all of you, then work on our homeschool group's website. A few more things need to be done and it should be published by the end of the week. It's been so much fun, and I would love to be able to work on more websites. I'll leave that in the Lord's hands.
I hate the girls being away, I can't seem to concentrate on anything that I really should be doing and end up wasting the time until they come back. :) Yep, sometimes it's hard to see our little ones grow up. I hope I'm a sweet little old lady with all my wits about me, no scratch that, I hope the Rapture happens before I get too old and that our whole family goes together. 40 was easy for me to reach, now I'm looking at 50 in 7 months - yikes! We did Apologia Astronomy one year and LOVED it, we made lapbooks with it. I also have the Botany book, but a friend has been borrowing it for the last couple of years, I hope I see it soon. Have a good evening. I hope you got some rest my friend. Don't let your money spending decision keep you awake. :)
Wow, you and I both seem to do the same kind of thinking ;)
I miss Anna terribly when she is not here. She is babysitting next week at a friend's house and I am alredy missing her.
When I turned 40, it really didn't hit me, until I actually turned 41 ;o)
Yes, i am thinking what will I do when my Anna leaves home in a couple more years.
Have a wonderful day :)
Katia
I know what you mean about wondering what we will be like when we are older. I keep saying to Handsome ...."please, remind me what I want to be when I am a MIL. Please remind me what I want to be when I am a grandma." [0= My mil is very grumpy and critical so I want to be more. I am having a horrible time loading a video on You tube. Do you know of another site ?
This blog is so I can share my journey with the Lord, my journey as a wife and mother, and my journey as a homeschool mom. I pray that you will see the Lord in my life through happy and sad times, and that this blog glorifies the Lord.
This is an award and tag free zone, thank you.
You mean both of them gone at the same time? Wow, have I finally reached that stage in my life? Since I'm sitting here in a quiet house, I guess I have. I've always been o.k. with being by myself. I lived on my own for a little over 7 years before I got married, so being by myself really wasn't an issue. But I will admit, I am so out of that habit now. I try to cram so many things in during those few hours I'm by myself. But usually what happens is I end of falling asleep. And I'm fighting to keep my eyes opened right now. 
) and Paul and my relationship seems to be changing a bit (for the good). I know that these are things I need to get use to, and truly I'm not worried about them, it's just all so different. But it's a good different too. When I looked down the road at age 20 I never envisioned myself where I am today. But I'm happy were I am today, though I know it will continue to change, and I think I'll be happy with the changes too.
Not quite sure where all of that came from, but when it just starts flowing, I just keep typing. Though this is read by others, its also my thoughts I want to have written down. Obviously that's something I needed to get out. Thanks for reading it with me.
