I have terrible auditory issues. Not only do I need one of those ear horns...eh? ....but I hear all lyrics incorrectly. My husband has a field day with this and often turns the radio down and quizzes me with "what was that last line?"  I guess that is why you might see me smiling and rocking back and forth to a song that explains lost love or depression.

My husband brought me some ear cleaner home, stating that "you have hearing that's getting out of hand". I didn't respond because I thought he said "you have clearance to land."  And he complains about my random thoughts...Geesh!

I once used some cleaner in my ear and my hearing became muffled...okay MORE muffled, for days. I finally went to the doctors. He looked inside my ear and said "Heavens woman, you have great balls of  wax in there!" If you are eating, stop here.

It was right before lunch and a poor nurse came in with a needleless syringe and tried pumping warm water into my ears to make the sound stopping milk duds come out. This was to no avail, and I could tell she getting totally grossed out. I profusely apologized and felt terribly inadequate for having such uncooperative ear wax. After no luck at all the Dr. came in with tweezers. I knew the nurse would be relieved, but I didn't know that there was hair INSIDE the ear. The ball had not come out because it was hardened onto the ear hair. He tugged,..... nothing.... and tugged, ...nothing, and once more he tugged,  I yelped and he dropped what sounded like a bullet slug into the pan. My ear bled a little...  and we had one more ear to do. Totally gross I know. But you see that was years ago, and it has gotten so bad again. I know what the problem is, and I can feel them move when I tilt my head. I can tell they are BIG this time. Did you know they even recommend pediatric stool softener to help loosten it? Administered into the ear of course!   

 Well I am not going to do that, besides it hasn't hurt my communication any. Well I gotta grow now, so I slope to walk to you wheel goon. 

Shell