I just have to share this wonderful story.  Get out your tissues.  Tears just flowed down my cheeks when I read this and again when I reread it to my dh! 

This was  written by a fellow forum member on MOMYS.COM.  Her name is Wendy.  I asked her if I could share it on my blog and she said I was welcome to share it with anyone who might be blessed by it!  I know you will be! 

Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 1:09 pm    Post subject: personal testimony - LONG
I should have shared this LONG ago, but I'm the poster child for procrastination. However, I've learned not to ignore the leadings of the Holy Spirit, so I made the time tonight to share this very personal, very true story. As some of you may remember, my now 5 yo dd was born with a birth defect, metopic suture craniosynostosis. In this defect, the suture (lines where the skull fuses into a single hard bone) that runs from the top of the nose to the top of the head at the "soft spot" fuse in utero. There are 5 suture lines, and often when the metopic is the affected suture it is only a cosmetic defect, and surgical correction is elective and not medically necessary. In Camden's case, however, it was not elective, as she had temporal pinching to the extent that her head circumference was only in the 10th percentile and she had cranial nerve impingement. So, we embarked on a journey, which would ultimately lead us to MAJOR reconstructive surgery. In this surgery, performed by a team consisting of a craniofacial surgeon as well as a neurosurgeon and others, an incision is made from ear to ear, the face is literally removed down to the nose, and the frontal and temporal bones are surgically broken and removed from the body for reconstruction in a surgical vat of sterile antibiotic solution. Then, they put Humpty Dumpty back together again. As you can imagine, this initiated a deep spiritual pilgrimage for dh and myself as well as our other dc. We decided that we would remain faithful that the Lord would see her through the surgery safely, and indeed He did. We were quite proud (big mistake) that we had been such righteous, faithful Christians in the face of such outstanding risks (stroke, hemorrhage, blindness, paralysis, etc., etc., etc.). The first surgery was done at our local facility in Greenville, NC, and was far from satisfactory. In fact, after the surgery, she looked the same, if not worse. We then went to Duke University in Durham, NC, for a second opinion. We were informed that she would, indeed, require a second surgical correction, as her head circumference remained in the 10th percentile. WHAT?????? How could this be? We had been so faithful. Hadn't we been such good Christians? How could the Lord allow this to happen to us after we had played our parts so well? Just to clarify time tables here, Camden was 2 weeks shy of her first birthday at the first surgery. The second surgery would be when she was 2.5. Going into the second surgery, I again chose faith. However, this time things felt very mechanical and empty. I had MUCH left to learn. When I prayed and sought the Lord, I did not feel His presence. This went on for several months. For that entire agonizing period, dh kept reassuring me that, "He will speak to you in His time." I began to worry. Never before had I felt that he had forsaken me. I kept repeating to dh, "I've been listening, and I don't hear him. He's just not saying anything." My sweet little Camden had faced so, so much in her very short life. Endless doctors' visits being poked, prodded, measured, scanned, x-rayed, blood draws, etc. She was SUCH a trooper through it all. Our bedtime routine that we had shared since she was born was as follows....each night I would hold her on the side of her sister's bed (where her crib was located). I would rock her while singing "Amazing Grace" until she fell asleep. We had done this every night of her life for almost 2.5 years. It was the Sunday before the second surgery, and I purposed to make it to church that Sunday. The enemy did everything he could think of to keep me from going. Dh asked, "Are you SURE we really need to go to church this morning?" Someone couldn't find their shoes, someone couldn't find socks, a dress, a tie, a shirt, etc. You name it, it went wrong that morning. My response, "If I have to go in curlers and a night gown, I AM GOING TO CHURCH, which will be a real feat because I don't wear curlers." I was CONVINCED that I would "get a word" at church. I was SURE that the pastor would have an inspirational sermon just for me or that the soloist would sing a song that would speak directly to my heart. I was going to receive my blessing and assurance that this second surgery was also going to be Spirit covered. Well, off to church we went, fully expecting our blessing. I was disappointed upon arrival to find that the pastor was not even there that day. The head deacon was delivering the sermon. Oh well, we'll still get what we need, right? Well, the sermon was delivered as uneventfully as any could have been. There as NOTHING that I could find that was directed at our situation. The music was beautiful but did NOT speak to our circumstances. The scripture lesson was completely off the topic I was looking for. To say I was disappointed would have been an understatement. I remained hopeful right until the end when he gave the blessing and released the congregation. As everyone began to gather Bibles and children, the deacon, who had begun to walk to the back of the church to greet everyone, suddenly stopped at the front of the church, and the following is a paraphrase of what he said: "May I please have everyone's attention again for just a moment? I've been in service to the church for over 30 years, and if there's one thing I've learned in those 30 years, it's that when the Holy Spirit speaks, you had better pay attention. Well, the Holy Spirit has just laid upon my heart that there is someone in this church today that needs something. I don't know who you are, but He does, and you do. So, whoever you are, this is for you directly from the Holy Spirit. I would like for everyone to join in a circle around the sanctuary and join hands while we sing the first verse of Amazing Grace acapella." It took EVERYTHING I had to keep from falling to my knees. Dh looked at me and said, "Well, was THAT loud enough for you?" As we joined hands around the sanctuary, the woman holding my hand to my left certainly knew that it was for ME, because I was shaking like someone having a grand mal seizure and sobbing the entire time. She squeezed my hand in tightening and loosening grips repeatedly as if to acknowledge I was the one in need and to encourage me. It was the most awesome display of power I have ever witnessed. I was physically exhausted the rest of the day, in complete awe, and incredibly HUMBLED at the work of the Spirit that day. I had learned my lesson, though every day is still a learning experience, I had come so far in my spiritual journey. Pride was losing its stronghold in my life. I was NOT a good Christian. I was and am a sinner, redeemed only through the grace, blood, and mercy of Christ. Well, as if that wasn't enough, there is MORE. Fast forward 2 years. My dad is in the hospital suffering from gangrene awaiting a below-the-knee amputation. At this point, we aren't even sure the surgery will save his life. As we're standing in the hallway talking with my very spiritual aunt, Joyce, she looks directly at my brother, Craig, and says, "You must have faith." This launches us into a discussion of faith. My brother is quite the intellectual and finds faith too far of a stretch for him, preferring science to faith. He looks at me and questions, "but how do you KNOW He exists." My response, "Craig, no one can PROVE to you the existence of God. You know He lives because you EXPERIENCE Him." He questions, "Have you ever felt Him?" I proceeded to share the story I just shared regarding the "Amazing Grace Sunday." A tear began to roll down his face, and he walked down the hall to where my dh was waiting in the lounge/snack room. He and dh stepped out into the hallway, directly across from the elevators, and my brother began to question dh about my story. My dh confirmed and repeated the story to him. As he finished, my brother responded, "that is the most incredible story I have ever heard," to which dh responded, "not quite, Craig. You want to hear something even more incredible? The Lord is working hard on you, brother, because that deacon who led us in Amazing Grace that Sunday? Well, he just stepped off the elevator behind you." Yes, ladies, God is chasing my brother earnestly. Well, does everyone have chills now? I hope that story is as incredible to everyone else as it is to me. Questions arise sometimes, and the dark emptiness of doubt begins to try to creep in, and when it does, I breathe in every memory of that story all over again, and I KNOW that I serve a LIVING GOD. AMAZING GRACE, HOW SWEET THE SOUND, THAT SAVED A WRETCH LIKE ME. _________________ God bless y'all real good. Wendy - DH, 15 years; dd 13; ds 8, dd 5, ds 8 months

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