I can't believe we've just begun our fourth week of school already.  It seems to be passing along so quickly.  I must admit I'm a school junkie.  I've always been a school junkie.  I was the child who longed for school to begin in the fall and hated to see it end in the spring.  A new box of crayons has an enticing smell.  I still remember the way my heart would leap for joy when the boxes of crayons arrived in our classrooms each fall.  I would relish the joy of opening the stiff cardboard, sniffing the waxy scent and then coloring in such a way as to keep the points pointy for as long as possible.  I never colored them down flat or, heaven forbid, break them because I pushed so hard as I made my strokes (all in one direction and approxamately the same length). 

I remember the joy of experiencing those same sounds and smells the first year I taught.  The wonderful aroma of fresh pencils shavings and the sound of the squeaky bus brakes.  It sure seemed like a dream come true.  Until the reality of teaching hit home.  I struggled with the politics of being a teacher.  I often felt like the principal had expectations that were never clearly spelled-out and that the "older" (read elderly) teachers had it out for me simply because I was young and had a sense of adventure in the classroom.  Yes, mine was the classroom that pushed everyones comfort level and that people walked slowly by so they could try to find something to gossip about. 

I also struggled with the sense of hopelessness I saw in my pupils and their families.  I had the privilege of teaching at Christian schools but was struck by how Christ-less the families seemed to be.  My heart ached for them to know Jesus in a deep and meaningful way.  I could teach them to read, count, do fractions, and write book-reports but without Christ it would all be meaningless.  

So, there I was.  A new teacher with a freshly minted dipolma and all ready my ideal is shattered.  I have to admit that I really began to be disillusioned with my career and began to beg God for some true direction.  At that time in my life I clung to Psalm 119:32, "I run in the path of  your commands, for you have set my heart free".  I continued to follow my career path and even began persuing a master's degree in Early Childhood Education (I told you I loved school).  I kept thinking that if I just found the "right" job that my concerns and frustrations would go away.  Well, they didn't.

Fast forward (so this doesn't become horribly long)...God didn't allow me to find that "job" that would answer my questions.  I searched and searched for it but it was elusive and I finally ended up realizing that God wanted be to be home and available for my dear husband.  I surrendered my desire for a career to God in the summer of 2001 and by March of 2003 we were moving out-of-state to pursue God's call as vocational missionaries.  God had the best plan for my life.  I praise Him for the opportunity to labor with my dh for almost 5 years as we diligently called families to the truth of Scripture and challenged them to focus on the eternal rather than the temporal. 

Yet, God wasn't done with my love to teach, learn, and experience school.  It was during our time as vocational missionaries that God called both dh and I to home education.  So, here I am still intoxicated with the smell of new crayons and having to control myself during the school supply sales.  But now I feel that I can truly be a teacher because my days are spend weaving the truths of Scripture in with the gift of knowledge and skill.  This is who I was created to be!  This is what I pray my former students can somehow experience in some small way. 

IMHO, I believe true education can only happen in the home and balanced with the truth of God's Word.