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Never say "I guess this has been a pretty good day" unless you are about thirty seconds from switching to the next day. A lot can happen to make you eat your words. Yesterday, after getting home from the play and resting for a bit, we get ready to go to church. About ten minutes before we are set to leave, my two year old, Hannah, comes out of the boys' room with the small silver balls from Caleb's Magnetix Set. Now, for those of you who do not know what those are, they are small rods with magnets embedded in the ends that you can attach to small silver balls and make all sorts of cool shapes. It is educational because you can make atom structures, DNA models, etc. It is also dangerous. I heard a couple of news stories about small children ingesting at least two of the magnetic rods, having them magnetize in the intestine and causing death. So when Hannah came strolling out with pieces to the set, I calmly asked her did she eat any of them. Her reply was "Yeeessssss" while batting her eyelashes. She seemed to know that it was going to cause a series of events unparalled in recent history.
After a quick call to her doctor, the nurse advised me that we had better get an x-ray just to make sure she didn't swallow them. "Better safe than sorry" she said. At this point, my mind had raced to the point that my little girl was going to have to undergo major surgery to remove these evil foreign objects and she was so little and why did we even buy those stupid things in the first place and did the van have enough gas to get us to the hospital and WHERE ARE MY KEYS?!?!
Thankfully, my dh was able to meet us at the hospital (which is no small feat because he is working a ton of overtime this week) so off we go. We get there, explain the story to about 50 different people and finally are called back by a nurse who had to be 16 years old or younger. She had braces (which I am not knocking, but it seemed to fit with the underage theme we had going), a ponytail on top of her head, metallic blue/green eyeshadow, a florescent print tropical blouse, several plastic brightly colored necklaces and plastic bright green nursing shoes. She also had the most high pitched, annoying voice you have EVER heard. As she took Hannah's vitals, she could not get the ear thermometer to work and said "Like, this thing doesn't like me...it's ALWAYS mean to me." Finally, when she was to the point of listening to Hannah's heart and lungs, even Hannah was eyeballing her, debating whether or not to ask for her credentials.
Long story short, the x-ray showed that Hannah had NOT ingested any of the Magnetix (I am going to begin teaching her about telling the truth) and we were free to go. Of course the doctor reminded us about throwing away the recalled Magnetix toy and we slinked out of there like a scolded puppy. Deep breath...time to go home and relax, right? Wrong.
Apparently, the heavens had popped a seam and we were in the midst of a downpour that would rival the great flood of Noah's time. Well, we would just have to be a little slow going home, right? Wrong. As we neared the bottom of the hill, I heard a loud "POP" and my windsheild wipers stopped in mid-stroke. I am not kidding. I turned them off, turned them back on, off, on, off, on, cursed silently, off, on, massaged my temple, off on, finally gave up and called my dh who was behind me wondering what in the world was going on, then rested my head on the steering wheel while repeating "I will not throw a temper tantrum, I will not throw a temper tantrum." After following Dewayne's tailights across the street to a gas station ( I literally could not see), we assessed the situation in a calm, rational manner. Actually, I think by this time I had reached the mental marker that causes everthing to amusing becuase it is so unbelieveable that it is actaully happening. Speaking of amusing, imagine driving down the road with three kids in a mini van, in the pouring rain, with the window rolled down, arm stuck out the window, squeegie in hand, trying desperately to clear off enough water to see some semblance of a road to follow. Now imagine doing this for the entire thirty minute (stretched into an hour and a half because of the circumstances) ride home.
The details of the rest of the trip can be summed up like this: Went to Micky D's to wait out the brunt of the storm, got terrible service, bad food; jumped back in the car to head home because there was apparently another thunderstorm right behind us (as told to us by my mom from her nice comfy recliner); got almost home, only to be stopped by a road block and told that power lines were down, we would have to find another way home. That sent us out of our way by about 20,000 miles. Needless to say, when we got home, kids went straight to bed, Dad crashed on the couch, and Mom...well, I settled in to a nice, warm bubble bath, hoping to soak away some of the day. The old saying goes, "That which does not kill you makes you stonger." I can honestly say I must be the strongest person in the world right now because that night almost killed me!! |
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