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So today has been one of those days where I have been feeling sorry for myself. You know the ones. Everything is going wrong, no one likes you, and no one wants to be your friend. I feel I am a bad mom, a bad wife, a bad daughter…no matter how hard I try something is going to be messed up! It was supposed to be a good day. Dewayne is off from work, we had plans to grill out, the pool is nice and clean and the weather is great. So why was I feeling down? Why am I feeling downright irritated with everyone? I couldn’t explain it. But I hated it. I went to visit my parents and had a nice talk with them. I also weighed in there and realized I had lost close to one more pound. That is almost 13! So far to go yet, but at least it is progress. I was feeling a little better when Dewayne called and asked me to run to the store to get a little more meat. Well, that just irritated me more. We already had meat, but the “Grill King” wanted more. Don’t get me wrong, I love to put grilled meat in the fridge and freezer for upcoming meals. Just pull out the already grilled meat, warm it slowly in a water bath and fix a couple of sides. Ta da! Dinner is served. But today was different. I had not fixed my hair, put on make up, nor was I dressed well enough to leave the Ranch. I was annoyed that Dewayne would ask me to “run to the store” (seven miles away) because he didn’t think the trillion pounds of meat we already had was enough. Wanting to avoid an argument, I agreed to run the errand. I went to a small grocery store in the next town because they were having a great Memorial Day sale on meats. And the quality is wonderful. I figured as long as I had to run in the first place, I may as well get the good stuff. After paying for my purchases, I was making my way to the parking lot when I saw an elderly woman standing beside my van. She was looking intently at it and pointing with her cane to the side door. Great! I thought she had backed into the side of my van! Just add one more cup of misery to my day! As I approached, she called out, “Is this your van?” “Yes.” I replied cautiously. She laughed that elderly chuckle, the one that takes years and experience to obtain. “You caught me,” she said, “I was asking my husband to take my picture beside your purty (that is southern for pretty) van. It is so nice!” A little confused, I thanked her. She admitted she was joking about taking the picture, but not about liking the van. We have a 2004 Nissan Quest. It is gold and has a lot of the bells and whistles. We did not go looking for that nice of a van, but the Lord really opened up the doors for us to get a nice vehicle for a great price. We were in awe at the time we drove it off the lot, marveling in God’s goodness and provision. I had forgotten about that until now. I told the woman exactly that. I gave praise to the Lord and his goodness right there in the parking lot. She reminded me that it says in James we have not because we ask not. And she joined me in praising the Lord. She said quietly, “You are so blessed.” I had just explained that the DVD system had come in really handy with our kids and long trips. After her quiet declaration, she grasped my arm and looked directly into my eyes. “YOU are so BLESSED!”, she said again with more emphasis. She had my full attention. In that moment, I felt she was speaking to my heart. She was speaking to my day, my inadequacies, my doubts, my fears, my bad mood. She had no idea how my day had gone, no idea what I was feeling. Or did she? You know, the Bible says that we entertain angels without knowing who they are. She got into a car with two other people and drove away. I am not saying for sure that she was a REAL angel, but I know she was my angel today. |
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Posted by Anonymous
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