Jan. 10, 2008 - What makes me happy?

I guess the title of this entry is a little misleading because at any given time there could be something new that is making me happy.  Currently there is something in my kitchen that makes me smile countless times throughout my day.  Every time I walk past it I find myself grinning from ear-to-ear.  It is exactly what I have needed to get me through these dreary, January days.

What currently makes me happy...A vase full of pink and orange tulips!! :O) 

Oh, how I love their open litle faces, their bright colours and their sweet fragrance.  I love them so much that I told Tim the other day if he ever wanted to send me flowers he could skip the roses and go right to the tulips!

This time of year can be a tough time.  The holidays are over, school starts back and the weather definitely leaves a lot to be desired.  A vase full of tulips hints at good things to come, though.  It is reminder of spring...fresh air, sweet smells...open doors and windows...evidence of new life everywhere you look!

Thank you, Papa, for tulips!  They were just what this girl needed! \O/

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Jan. 9, 2008 - She's growing up!

With a 15yo, very beautiful, daughter...this struck a chord with me!  Thought you may enjoy it! :O)

 

 

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Dec. 20, 2007 - Santa in the Manger

Santa in the Manger

We got a card the other day

A Christmas one, in fact,

But it really was the strangest thing

And showed such little tact.

 

For laying in the manger

Was Santa, big as life,

Surrounded by some little elves

And Rudolph and his wife.

 

There was so much excitement

That the shepherd’s saw the glow

Of Rudolph’s bright and shining nose

Reflected on the snow.

 

So in they rushed to see him

Followed by the wise men three,

Who came not bearing any gifts ~

Just some stockings and a tree.

 

They gathered round about him

To sing praises to his name;

A song about Saint Nicholas

And how he came to fame.

 

Then they handed him the lists they’d made

Of, oh, so many toys

That they were sure they would receive

For being such good boys.

 

And sure enough he chuckled,

While reaching in his bag,

And placed in all their outstretched hands

A gift that bore a tag.

 

And on that tag was printed

A simple verse that read,

“Even though it’s Jesus’ birthday,

Please take this gift instead.”

 

Then I realized they really did

Know Who this day was for

Though by every indication

They had just chosen to ignore.

 

And Jesus looked upon this scene,

His eyes so filled with pain ~

They said this year’d be different

But they’d forgotten Him again.

 

Barb Cash

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Nov. 30, 2007 - A must read!

Just wanted to give you a heads up on a book that, in my humble opinion, is a must-read for all Christians!!!  Give it a shot!  I don't think you'll be diappointed!!

 

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Nov. 18, 2007 - When time stands still!

There are times in our lives when time seems to stand still!  It happens on days when it is extremely chaotic and I think it feels about 4 hours later than it actually is! LOL!  There are some times when time seems to stand still, though, and it is for a good reason.  I got to experience one of those good times last week. 

In 8th grade I was in Mr. Richardson's french class.  Not too exciting a subject, but one of the best times of my life.  As a result of this class, I met Janet Adams!  We became fast friends and Janet was instrumental in me coming to know the Lord.  He used Janet to show me a different way of living life and, although it took a few years, I embraced the Jesus I saw in her life in a passionate way.

Last week my son, Benji, and I got to go to Toronto to celebrate his 13th birthday.  He is the only child I have that shows signs of having inherited any of my Canadian blood and I was thrilled when Toronto was his choice for a place to go!  Benji and I had a wonderful time and made some great memories.  Seeing the sights with my boy was such a fun time and time with Janet and her family topped the list for me.

It had been 8 years since I last saw Janet and I had never had the pleasure of meeting her dear children.  Her girls and Benji became fast friends and Janet and I had lots of time to catch up and share our hearts with each other.  Time flies until you are with a heart friend!  Somehow the clock winds back and all those years apart are lost in the thrill of being together again!

Thank you, Janet, for loving me for all these years and for being the one person I can talk to with whom I have a past (besides family, of course)!  You remain one of the true joys of my life and I can never thank you enough for the impact you had on my life back when we were in school!  I love you!!!

 

 

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Nov. 1, 2007 - Blessed!

Been a while, but here I am! :O)  I am actually here because I am excitedly trying out my new toy!  I have a new, 17", Dell laptop and I am thrilled!

I have been desiring a laptop for a very long time, but it was never really in the finances!  Well, the Lord, in His way of surprising His children with amazing gifts, provided for me to get that which was for a long time just a dream!  Again, He was blessing me in ways to lofty for me to foresee and I was humbled and saddened all at the same time.

I got to go for a walk yesterday morning and, while enjoying the chill in the air, I had a come-to-Jesus type meeting with the Lord.  I am not usually a stressed out kind of person, but lately I had found myself having an anxious heart about a few things ~ finances not being the least of them!   The Lord has been easing this anxiousness slowly but surely in His very faithful way.  Money we had not been expecting came back to us and a friend blessed us with a very generous gift.

I started thinking about Rachel and her recent birthday.  She turned 15 and we had planned a surprise party for her.  We planned and planned and did such a good job of keeping our secret that she was convinced we were not really doing anything for her.  She could not see all that was going on  behind the scenes and went on what she could see and feel and touch!

Wow!  How often I do that with the Lord!  I allow what I can see and feel and touch to dictate my emotions and I forget that there is more going on in the heavenlies than I could ever imagine!!  Just as our earthly fathers love to give their children gifts, how much more does our heavenly Father love to give us good gifts ~ gifts that arrive at the perfect time in the perfect way!

I started weeping and asked the Lord to forgive my lack of faith!  I confessed that I had made calculations about a number of things without factoring Him into the equation!  Oh me of little faith!!!  And then, in spite of all the stressing I had done, the Lord laid a brand new, beautiful laptop in my hands! 

So here I am and I hope to be here more.  Not being able to write because of time constraints is sad for me so maybe this will provide me with more opportunities to hide away and make sense of my scattered thoughts through the written word!  In the meantime, let me leave you with one last thought...

Jesus can always be trusted in spite of what you may be seeing, feeling and touching!

 

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Aug. 23, 2007 - I really did it!

I am SO challenged when it comes to figuring out how to add stuff on this blog, but I actually added music today!  I am not sure how I did it and probably couldn't do it again if I tried, but for now it is there! :OD

Now if I could just figure out how to add pictures and things in my sidebar!  (And I know you tried Nikki, but I just can't figure out how to do it!  Wish we could have had that visit after all so you could give me a tutorial!)

So for now I have music and who knows what I'll figure out next?  I think I have just enough skill to be dangerous!  LOL!

 

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Aug. 23, 2007 - A confession!

Okay, I have a confession!  I admit it...I am going to go stark raving mad if it doesn't cool off here soon!  I told Tim that I wouldn't use the word "depressed", but I am close to reaching that point if we break too many more records and have too many more days over 100 with high humidity!

Remember, I am from Toronto, girls!  I am used to a few hot days, but nothing like this!  We were watching the Little League World Series yesterday and they were wearing jackets!!  I have been dreaming about putting on jeans and a sweatshirt and there they were, huddled under jackets and long-sleeved shirts.  I was insanely jealous and a little put-out that I was sweating in an air-conditioned house with the ceiling fan going. 

I called my MIL today and told her I was getting ready to get in the car and drive north until the afternoon temperature was 75 ~ not the morning one!  I invited her to join me and she said she'd get her bags packed.  I am dreaming of cool, crisp mornings and afternoons with the windows thrown open wide. 

I started work on booking a weekend in the mountains for us today.  I could almost feel the fresh mountain air as I gazed at the pictures!  There we were in my mind's eye sleeping, windows open, snuggled under a big, thick quilt!  It was torture so I turned off the computer and went and fixed myself a big glass of ice water.  I resisted the urge to dump it over my head and just drank it!

Now don't get me wrong!  I have a heart full of incredible thankfulness to the Lord for the gift of air-conditioning.  I was almost physically ill the other day thinking of those who must do without.  I really cannot imagine how hot they are!  For that reason, I know I seem like a bit of a baby about the way I feel, but I really am close to falling off the edge.  I just wish it was the edge of a clear, cool pond with a light breeze blowing!  Jumping would be a no-brainer!!

Well, for now I will continue to hibernate behind blinds that are drawn to keep out the sun and dream of falling leaves that crackle underfoot, the smell of apple cider on the stove, pumpkin bread in the oven and that amazing Harvest candle that Yankee Candle makes!  It surely can't be too much longer til we turn the corner...can it?!

 

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Jul. 31, 2007 - The Love of Jesus!

I have been meaning to post this for a while, but just haven't taken the time.  I realize it was too precious a moment to ignore so here goes...

As you all know if you have followed my blog at all, Caleb and I spent almost a week at Scottish Rite Hospital this month.  One boy that we met while there and spent a lot of time with was Dustin.  The post right before this one will give you some background if you aren't sure about his story.

The day that we were to leave the hospital was a joyous time for us.  Our friends, Smith and Julie were there with us, and it was a crazy time trying to make sure we had packed all we brought with us and all we had paid dearly for while there.  You know the drill..."Hey, take that box of Kleenex!  We probably paid $10 for it!" LOL!  

Amidst all the confusion, Caleb kept saying he wanted to tell Dustin good-bye.  Dustin had gotten to be Caleb's buddy and he usually wouldn't settle down for the night until Dustin had stuck his head in the door and assured Caleb he would see him in the morning.  Leaving the hospital without telling Dustin bye was not an option for Caleb. 

Dustin, however, was still asleep and I was reluctant to wake him.  I told Caleb we would write Dustin a note and tell him we would miss him and would be praying for him.  One of the nurses heard what we were doing and assured me that Dustin was due to get up and it would be fine to go in and tell him we were leaving.  The nurse led the way with Caleb hot on her trail!

We went in Dustin's darkened room and he began to stir.  He had a bit of that deer in the headlights look when he saw us all there, but it didn't last for long.  In a moment mixed with 3yo excitement and compassion way beyond his years, Caleb reached up, stroked Dustin's face and in a gentle voice said, "Good-bye Dustin!  I love you!" 

My heart leapt to my throat and I was moved beyond words.   My sweet boy had just shared the love of Jesus with one of the forgotten ones!  I pray that those words will resonate in Dustin's heart and he will be reminded that a little 3yo boy named Caleb really did care! 

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Jul. 10, 2007 - Praise the Lord for Benadryl!

Benadryl may seem like a strange thing to praise the Lord for, but if you had been up in the middle of the night the night before with a ravenous 3yo, you might feel the same way! :O)  I am also quite thankful for the 2 Advil Pm that I washed down right before bed. ;O)  Needless to say, we slept quite well last night which is a BIG praise!

We are scheduled for surgery tomorrow at 7:30am EST.  I am ready to get this show on the road and so is Caleb.  He has been a good bit fussier today and has had a couple of meltdowns.  He says he needs to go home!  He got to see R/B/J and H today and took great pride in showing them his current digs.  Benji was laughing at how well he knew his way around.  I told him it was because he had probably logged at least 8 miles on the tricycle from the playroom.  I may actually lose weight while in here! LOL!

Hannah and I got to go eat breakfast this morning when she got here with Tim.  It was a joyful reunion that made her tears upon leaving that much harder.  She is a Mama's girl and 2 days has been quite long enough to be separated in her 4yo mind!

My little friend, Andrea, (a 14 mo Mexican girl) got to go home today.  She is as cute as can be with little Cindy Lou Who pigtails and that diapered bottom sticking out the back of her gown!  Her mom and I spent a lot of time together and they brought Caleb a balloon before they left.  Andrea was in because she got an infection from a spider bite and they were thankful to end their 5 day stay here.  Her Mama asked for our phone number and e-mail so we could stay in touch.  What a sweet family!

Little Kayla went to visit the turtles and fish with us today and this afternoon she is getting a CT scan to see if there are further abuse issues that they may not know about!  I wish I had a camera because you would never imagine how someone could have looked at that sweet little face and then committed heinous crimes against her.  Makes my blood boil and my heart constrict just thinking about it!  Her hearing was postponed til today so her foster parents , who have been with her around the clock, are still unsure whether or not she will come home with them.  They are very hopeful ~ and so am I!!

We hung out with Dustin today and our boys got to meet him and hear his story.  Both of them had trouble processing that, at 15, he was all alone in this world.  His mom, whom he hasn't seen since he was 4, is a drug abuser.  His dad died 4 years ago and his grandparents are all dead.  His 18yo brother "lives in jail" ,as he put it, and has since he was 13.  His younger brother is in foster care and his younger sister lives with an aunt. 

We spoke to an administrative person today and asked him if he could talk to Dustin's case-worker and see what was being done for him.  Tim is going to try and make some calls and see if he can get some help for him.  Our friends brought us lunch today from an Italian restaurant and so he is going to dine with Caleb and me tonight on leftovers!  He said he was bored today so I offered to play cards with him.  He declined so we took him some travel games we had brought.  He seemed to like that better.

Please pray that the Lord would intervene in Dustin's life and help us find a way to provide more stability for him!  He is a lonely boy, with no home, who doesn't know he really matters to anyone!

Well, my sleeping prince is awakening from his slumber so I better put my walking shoes on.  We have a lot of ground to ride over before bedtime!

 

 

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Jul. 9, 2007 - Disclaimer

It seems best that I add a disclaimer before you read the post below.  I KNOW there are many parents who must leave their children here at the hospital and are broken-hearted that they cannot be with their babies. 

The children I am refering to below in my post are ones I know are here alone.  I met a little girl named Kayla this morning and she played with us for a while.  She is here with a foster dad having been admitted on Friday as a child abuse victim.  Big scabs covered her little fingers where she had been burned; bruises lined her tiny body. 

She is one my heart cries out to the Lord on behalf of.  Her physical scars will soon be a distant memory, but her emotional ones may linger...

 

 

 

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Jul. 8, 2007 - Just tears...

I am writing this from the light of a dimly lit bulb in a room at Children's Healthcare of Atlanta.  I am here with Caleb, our baby, for his third surgery as the result of an aspirated pumpkin seed.  Hard to believe one seed could cause so much struggle, but it has.

I hate to see my baby here, IV in his little hand, bags of who really knows what dripping slowly in.  There's not really any other option, though, for him...or for me! 

He's the patient, but I'm the one with the hurting heart!  Hurting for Caleb, yes it's true, but hurting for the others.  The ones I see when I walk down the halls.  The babies, laying in their beds, ALONE, staring at the walls, crying out to whoever will listen.  It's them, Lord, that cause my tears to flow in torrents as I pace around our darkened room.

Tears for Dustin, 10 maybe, his mail addressed to DFACS.  I heard him tell an oncoming nurse he  felt abandoned by his nurse today; a nurse who had probably spent the day run off her feet, but who provided some of the only care and stability this lonely boy knows right now.  The mask he's forced to wear may keep out the germs, but it can't keep the pain from escaping!

I asked a nurse if I could talk to one a while ago.  So still and small in that big bed, barely 6 months old.  I don't know her story; don't know where her parents are; don't know why she is here and they are not.  Maybe pain keeps them away.  Pain is like that, you know...makes you run when you're needed most!  I rubbed her little hand and whispered to her softly.  I told her You hadn't forgotten.  You knit her together and numbered her hairs and you know... 

My tears are but a drop in Your bucket, aren't they?  "Let the little children come unto Me, for such is the kingdom of God."    You see it, too, and it hurts your Abba's heart!

I want to run.  I want to pack my baby up and head for our home, tucked safely away from the pain.  I won't, though, I promise... for it's the cowardly way out. 

I'll touch them, Lord, and hope they feel Your touch.  I'll sing to them, Lord, and hope they hear Your voice.  And I'll pray for them, Lord, and hope Your Holy Spirit will minister with groanings that words cannot express, for there are no words...just tears...

 

 

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Jul. 2, 2007 - It's not all about the baseball!

We are a baseball family.  My dh played professionally, we watch baseball, minister to baseball players and we have some pretty good little players in our sons.  I am surrounded by it! :O)

Benji plays on a 12yo travel team and it has been an amazing year.  It has been a very successful year baseball-wise, but relationally it has been off the chart.  The coaches have been great, the boys have had a blast and cheered and supported each other, the parents have been united and have thoroughly enjoyed the time we have spent with each other.  It has been a very relational year!!

It's been a tough year, too, because many of the families have been touched by things that hurt them so they hurt the rest of us.  A couple of grandparents have been hospitalized, one Grandpa died this last week, a 20 yo cousin was found floating face-down dead in a pool, our Caleb is facing his third surgery, one of the boy's mom is having a hip replacement in a week and one of the precious moms on the team is facing a tough fight against an aggressive form of cancer!  So much pain!  So many needs!

We had our end-of-the-year party last night and it was unlike any other I have ever attended.  There was the usual food, swimming and plenty of laughter!  There was lots of fun conversation and a cooler of ice did end up over a certain coach's body!  What was different, you may ask?  We PRAYED! 

We had a very intense and lengthy time of intercessory prayer for those among us who were hurting.  We laid hands on each other and anointed the sick with oil.  We beseeched the Lord to intervene on behalf of those we have come to love!  We had church! 

There is a reason the Lord assembled these particular families together.  There was a try-out process and each boy had to make the team.  It seemed that they were picked because of their baseball skills, but I know it was more.  The sovereign Lord, back in the fall of 2006, hand-picked each boy from each family...for such a time as this!!  You know why I know this and I can say it with full confidence? 

It's not all about the baseball!!

 

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Jun. 17, 2007 - A word from Tim...

CASTING CROWNS has a song that is titled - "Who Am I"

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth  - Would care to know my name - Would care to feel my hurt

Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star - Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am - But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done - But because of who You're

I am a flower quickly fading - Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean - A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling - Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am - I am Yours, I am Yours

Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin - Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea - Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Not because of who I am - But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done - But because of who You're

I am Yours - Whom shall I fear - Whom shall I fear                                                            'Cause I am Yours - I am Yours                                                                                                  

Do you ever struggle with your identity?

Do you ever wrestle with questions like: Who am I? What is my purpose? What does God want from me? Does my life really have value? Do the choices I make matter?

 

Ponder these powerful – yet simple truths…

God calls me HIS child.                     John 1:12; 1 John 3:1

God calls me His friend.                    John 15:15

God says I am completely justified. I am righteous in HIS sight.    Romans 5:1

God says HE has bought me and that I belong to HIM.                  1 Cor. 6:19,20

God calls me a saint.                          Eph. 1:1; Romans 1:7

God has redeemed me and forgiven me of ALL my sins.               Col. 1:14

God says I a complete in Christ.        Col. 2:9,10

 

When I ponder who God says I am – I sense an incredible freedom. I sense that what HE says is all that counts. The world seeks to mold and conform us into its image.

God is at work to will and to act according to HIS purpose and plan.

Do you believe what God says about you is true?

 

Whom shall I fear? I am Yours! I am your child! Your friend! A Saint!  Complete! Justified!

Righteous! I belong to you! I am YOURS!

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Jun. 2, 2007 - A Study of Contrasts

Many of you have heard me talk about my dear friends, Smith and Julie, whose 4yo son, Jackson, was killed 2 1/2 years ago.  It was tragic and changed them forever.  It changed them in painful, heart-wrenching ways and it changed them in powerful, heart-changing ways! 

This week their story was on Oprah.  Oprah, being Oprah, didn't really allow the full impact of their story to be shared because their story is rooted in the power of Jesus Christ.  Talk like that makes Oprah nervous! 

There was another family on before S&J who had lost a daughter in a horrific way as the result of a drunk-driving accident.  It was a story that was painful to watch on many counts, but especially because of the lack of hope and joy this family possessed!  And that is where the study in contrasts came...

While Smith and Julie didn't get to share the hope they had in Jesus Christ in so many words, and while they edited their oldest daughter sharing how it is only because of Jesus that they could even go on, and while they never got to share the resolve they made that they would live in such a way as to join Jack in heaven one day ~ you could tell. 

You could see the hope in their eyes.  You could tell that, while pain still floods their hearts at times, joy is present.  Smith and Julie have it!  Maddie and Macie have it!  Those of us who love them and share life with them witness it every day, and those who watched Oprah were given a glimpse of it, too.  One couple was hopeless, dreading the arrival of each new day.  The other couple, equally touched by tragedy, extended forgiveness and talked of their embrace of each new day!

I love this family and count it such a privilege to have an opportunity to witness the power of Jesus in their lives.  They challenge me and convict me in ways I never would have been if I hadn't walked this road with them.

I wish Oprah wasn't so afraid of truth and that her team didn't censor their interviews in such a cowardly way, but the truth of Jesus Christ does scare people.  Even when they see the unmistakable evidence of His presence in a person's life, they shy away from it.  They don't want to offend and they don't want to take a stand.  Wishy-washy is always best in their books!

I take comfort in knowing, though, that the Lord will use Smith and Julie to continue to impact the lives around them.  I know what they said that day and I know an audience full of people heard the truth.  I know the people that came and filmed Smith and Julie and their family at home saw a difference in their family because they said they did! 

So Jesus was glorified in spite of Oprah's attempts to present a spiritually sterile show!  The contrast was evidence that His power is real and He is still changing hearts, healing pain and placing a hope and joy where it doesn't make sense to find one! 

Praise Him!! \O/

 

 

 

 

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May. 12, 2007 - So much time has passed...

So much time has passed since I last posted on my blog!  Why?  I am not even sure.  Seemed at first like there was just a lot going on and not much time and then the more I ignored it the harder it was to face it!  Kinda like cleaning the fridge! LOL!

I had a sweet friend e-mail me recently and tell me that she checks for new entries from me and she had missed hearing what was on my heart!  That was so humbling and it meant so much, Kristina!  Thanks for blessing me like that!

Much has happened in the last few months...My biggest boy turned 12 and my littlest boy turned 3!  Where does the time go?  I have attended more baseball games than I can count ~ and my boys have turned into amazing ball players!  I have seen my biggest girl blossom into a beautiful young woman who is passionately pursuing Christ and my littlest girl work hard to learn to speak correctly!  I have seen my baby turn into a little boy right before my very eyes and we have officially conquered potty training 5 times!!  (That in itself deserves a medal!)

We have seen the dissolve of one marriage and the digging in of 2 other dear friends to try and save another.  I have seen a dear homeschool friend, Maggi, fight for her life and was forced to ponder again the brevity of life!  I have seen the body of Christ rally together and support one another in prayer and other tangible means and I have been challenged to look at what I can do to be a better leg or arm!

What I haven't done is find much time to write and that has been sad for me.  Writing is a means for maintaining sanity in my life and that might account for some of my crazy thoughts! LOL!  Not enough time to sort them out and record them!

So all that is to say...I am back!  I will do my best to be diligent and to make time to record the ponderings of my heart and the milestones we are all facing!  Thanks for being the kind of friends that spur me along to pursue what is missing in my life!

 

 

 

 

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Dec. 16, 2006 - An empty manger!

Okay, I am sure the title of this entry may not make any sense to you, but bear with me!

Have you ever wondered why so many people can accept the reality of Jesus being born, but never see their need for Him as their Saviour?  I have been pondering this lately and the Lord, I believe, showed me one possible reason why...

Some people have never taken Jesus out of the manger!!!

Think with me for a minute...Even with the attempts of some to remove Jesus from Christmas all together, there is still ample opportunity to see a manger scene in stores, in front of churches and in many of our homes.  We, ourselves, have one out front of the house and at least 5 or 6 displayed inside ~ some all year round.  While there is nothing inherently wrong with this, it gives the illusion to some that Jesus was merely a baby who was born amidst much hoopla.  End of the story!

The reality of his birth is not hard for them to grasp, but they stop short of acknowledging that Jesus grew in wisdom and stature and favour with God and man.  They can't accept the crucifixion and they certainly don't want to mentally entertain the thought of the resurrection.  Why you may ask? 

Well, as long as Jesus is tucked safely away in swaddling clothes and laying in a manger He is no threat  to them and the "safe" little world they have created for themselves.  To allow Him to grow up, suffer unimaginably and then raise Himself from the dead requires something from us!  It requires us to search our hearts and come to some tough conclusions...either Jesus is Who He says He is or He made the whole thing up!

When our children have a birthday we have a lot of fun remembering their birth stories and laughing about how each one made their grand entrance into our world.  We don't stop there, though.  We also celebrate who each child has become and what they mean to each of us now!  We don't just look at pictures of them as a newborn, sing them a song and then go on with our lives until the next year when we pull out the birth pictures again!  To do that would be to deny the reality of who they have become to us and how our lives have been forever changed because of the privilege of sharing this journey with them.

So let me challenge you as you celebrate the birthday of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.  Enjoy those mangers and, by all means, remember how God came to earth wrapped in flesh, but once the 26th of December rolls around ~ put Baby Jesus away.  Let others see an empty animal trough and ask you what happened to Jesus!  It may just be the opportunity you've been looking for to share the hope we have in Christ!  Share the rest of the story!  Not only is that manger empty , but that tomb they placed His tortured body in is, too!   

My life has forever been changed because of the birth, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ!  If yours has, too, then join with me in letting others know that our mangers are empty and we serve a resurrected Lord!

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Dec. 15, 2006 - Santa in the Manger

We got a card the other day

A Christmas one, in fact,

But it really was the strangest thing

And showed such little tact.

 

For laying in the manger

Was Santa, big as life,

Surrounded by some little elves

And Rudolph and his wife.

 

There was so much excitement

That the shepherd’s saw the glow

Of Rudolph’s bright and shining nose

Reflected on the snow.

 

So in they rushed to see him

Followed by the wise men three,

Who came not bearing any gifts ~

Just some stockings and a tree.

 

They gathered round about him

To sing praises to his name;

A song about Saint Nicholas

And how he came to fame.

 

Then they handed him the lists they’d made

Of, oh, so many toys

That they were sure they would receive

For being such good boys.

 

And sure enough he chuckled,

While reaching in his bag,

And placed in all their outstretched hands

A gift that bore a tag.

 

And on that tag was printed

A simple verse that read,

“Even though it’s Jesus’ birthday,

Please take this gift instead.”

 

Then I realized they really did

Know Who this day was for

Though by every indication

They had just chosen to ignore.

 

And Jesus looked upon this scene,

His eyes so filled with pain ~

They said this year’d be different

But they’d forgotten Him again.

 

Barb Cash

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Nov. 2, 2006 - A mind-blower!

Psalm 45:11 says, "The King is enthralled with your beauty."  Wow!  The King of Kings and Lord of Lords thinks I am beautiful!  The One who tossed the stars into the sky and made them stick is enthralled by ME!  That really is a mind-blower!!

 

The Lord and I have been on an interesting journey lately.  Do you ever feel like you’re just cruising along, minding your own business and all of a sudden the Lord grabs your hand and says, “Come on, let’s go!”  Before long your hair is blowing in the breeze and you are being whisked along on a journey you never asked to go on, whose destination you are very unsure of, but you know Who you are traveling with so it is sort of okay.  That’s how it’s been for me.

 

Our friend, Mac Powell, has a CD coming out soon on which are a lot of songs that he has written based on specific passages in scripture.  One of them is based on Zeph. 3:17 ~

 

Zeph. 3:17 

            "The Lord your God is in your midst,

            A victorious warrior.

            He will exult over you with joy,

            He will quiet you in His love,

            He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy.”

 

It’s an awesome song and I find myself listening to it over and over.

 

Well, recently I had the privilege of meeting a woman named Tania whose son plays on Benji’s football team.  About 8 months ago, Tania’s husband left her and they just recently got divorced.  It has been a rough road for Tania, but she has felt the Lord sustaining her and loving her in ways she never has before.  She has been a beautiful example in my life of God’s grace and how a woman can be radiant even in the midst of great struggle!

 

One night we were on the way home from BS and Tim had to make a phone call.  I was singing a praise song to myself and I started praying for Tania.  I was telling the Lord how neat it was to see the way Tania really wanted Him to be glorified in her life and how she wanted others to see His power evidenced in her life.  All of a sudden I heard the Lord say in a quiet voice, “But she needs to know that I rejoice over HER with singing, too!”

 

I got so excited that I wanted to call Tania when I got home, but it was too late.  She works so I was going to have to wait till she got home from school to call her, but I never had to.  The Lord wanted her to have this message so badly that SHE called ME for the first time ever the next afternoon.  I shared what the Lord had laid on my heart and Tania started to cry softly.  It was a special moment for both of us.

 

I was so excited that the Lord loved Tania so much that He would go to such lengths to affirm His love for her.  How cool, is that?  But you know what?  He wasn’t done!

 

Before I knew it, He was asking me a question, directly at ME, not on anyone else’s behalf.  He asked me, “Barb, do you believe that I rejoice over YOU with singing, too?”

 

“Me?  Really?”  I mean, I believe it for others, but I don’t know if I can truly wrap my mind around it for myself! I know He loves me, He sent His Son to die for me and He will always care for me as only He can.  The whole “rejoicing over me with singing” stuff really blows my mind, though. 

 

At the same time He is dropping this bomb on me *wink*, He had me pull out a book that I had bought a while ago to preview (I thought) as a study for my BS girls.  It is called, Do You Think I Am Beautiful and He used it to continue to disrupt what (I again “thought”) was my peaceful existence.  How I could have considered it peaceful, when I have struggled so much with those “counterfeit voices” in my life is beyond me, though.

 

You see, I struggle with body image.  I struggle with insecurity about how I look and can become preoccupied with it if I let myself.  Part of it is probably because I minister to girls with Barbie-doll bodies, but that really is no excuse.  I hate it because it’s pride.  Tim shared this truth with me one day and I have to admit I didn’t receive it very well at first.  After my righteous indignation died down and I allowed the truth of it to sink in, I had to agree.  Pride is not JUST arrogance.  Pride is pre-occupation with self and I certainly was!  I was beating myself up for all my perceived imperfections and I was living a defeated life in areas.

 

Reading this book was so eye-opening for me, though.  This is where I first became aware that the King is truly enthralled with me!

 

Wow!  Doesn’t that kind of make your skin tingle!  “The King is enthralled with my beauty!”  Isn’t that all that really matters in the big scheme of things?  I can try all I want to look good, live up to other’s expectations and make sure I do everything just right, but someone will always be disappointed.  If I do all that I do for the benefit of One, then the pressure is relieved and I can walk in freedom like He meant me to all along. 

 

I work on a homeschool message board and I noticed last week that one of my friends had Zeph. 3:17 in her signature line.  I let out a small gasp and did a double take and realized that this is a message that I think the Lord really wants me to get.  I asked why she had that scripture there and this is what she said…

 

I love having my hair played with. I find it very comforting and relaxing. When I meditate on that verse, I keep getting this picture of me laying in Jesus' lap, feeling totally calm, and loved and quiet, and He is playing with my hair and singing quietly. Not because I've been wounded or just returned from some harrowing journey or because I asked him to...but just because He delights in me.

When I read Do You Think I'm Beautiful?, one of the pieces that stuck out to me the most was when Angela talks about how so many women live in a world where they are always feeling both "too much and not enough." That is so me! I'm too hot-headed. I'm not submissive enough. I'm too fat. I'm not thin enough. I'm too selfish. I'm not giving enough. I'm too controlling. I'm not faithful enough..... You see where I'm going with this.

Living in that purgatory of self-image is exhausting. God tells me I'm enough! And when I'm wrestling with belief, He doesn't stand on the other side of the abyss, waiting for me to "Get it" and then He'll talk to me. Instead, He promises to pull me into His arms, quiet me with His love, play with my hair until I'm calm (my addition) and sing over me ~ and not because He has to, but just because He truly finds me delightful.

 

Can you relate?  I know my friend and I are not the only two women around that find this concept difficult to wrap our minds around!!  I highly recommend the book Do You Think I am Beautiful?  While I know my journey to freedom in this area is just beginning, this book really did help give me a better perspective and it pointed me to Truth ~ something that is sorely lacking in the assault on women's minds these days!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Oct. 11, 2006 - My Longing Fulfilled!

  
   Hope deferred makes the heart sick,
    But a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

  Proverbs 13:12 

As a little girl all I ever remember wanting to be was a Mama!  I am sure there was maybe a passing teacher, nurse or librarian phase, but truly there was never anything else that I consistently longed to be.  As time went on and I grew older and wiser (*grin*) I realized that my dream also included a Daddy for all those beautiful babies I was going to have. 

 

In 1990 the Lord allowed the first part of my dream to unfold when I became Mrs. Tim Cash.  That was wonderful and I couldn't have asked for a better man, but there was still a longing in my heart and a secret fear that maybe I never would really be a Mama.  As so often happens, though, my fears were put to rest and the hope in my heart was realized!

 

October 11,1992 I became a Mama!  Rachel Kristin Cash entered our lives and I have never been the same since.  I would sit and rock her and sob!  I am sure hormones played a small part in my tears, but they truly were tears of thanksgiving for this precious gift wrapped in the person of Rachel!

 

The years have slipped past so quickly and our little girl is fast becoming a young woman.  We were able to take Rachel out for dinner last week, just the 3 of us!  With 4 others in the house, this was a rare and special time!  Tim was able to share with Rachel about the gift of purity that she would one day have the privilege of giving her husband if she chose to remain steadfast and sure in her walk with the Lord.  We then gave her a sterling silver ring with a heart in the center and the word "Purity" etched in the top.  Serious heart-to-hearts are somewhat difficult for Rachel as she is more of a private thinker, but she endured it well and I even think she actually enjoyed it just a tad.

 

It was neat, though, because sitting directly behind Rachel at the next booth was an older lady by herself who would have had to be hearing-challenged not to have overhead at least some of our conversation.  As dinner came to a close and Tim and Rachel headed for the door, this lady stopped me and told me she had something to share with me. 

 

She asked me to tell Tim what an amazing job she felt he did as Rachel's Daddy affirming her and sharing God's truths with her.  Then she asked me to tell Rachel that she had prayed for her as she sat there and that she would continue to do so in the days to come!  What an encouragement the Lord allowed us all to experience from a seemingly lone diner who was really dining with the King of Kings after all!

 

So today I wish my "little girl" a very heartfelt Happy Birthday!  Thank you for making my dreams come true and for being the kind of daughter any Mama would be thrilled to have!  You have exceeded my wildest dreams as a daughter and I can't wait to see what the Lord has in store for you in the years to come!! 

 

I am proud to be your Mama!!

 

I love you!! 

 

 

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